425. Coaching Hotline: Resisting Pleasure or Not Enjoying It

Confidence doesn’t come from promotions, degrees, or other people telling you that you’re impressive. In this episode, I revisit one of the earliest conversations on the podcast to break down the myths about where confidence comes from and why relying on external validation alone never works.You’ll learn why starting with your past accomplishments is helpful but not enough and how the deeper work of confidence comes from developing internal trust in yourself. This episode lays the foundation for building confidence that is self-generated, resilient, and ready to support all areas of your life.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/432The Socratic Coaching Method Certification: thesocraticcoachingacademy.comFollow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil

Other people are going to make choices you don’t agree with - your partner won’t go to therapy, your family says things that clash with your values, your friends act in ways that frustrate you. The real question isn’t how to change them - it’s how you’re going to show up for yourself when faced with choices you don’t like.In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that get right to the heart of accepting other people’s autonomy. I share why trying to control someone else’s choices only creates suffering, how to support yourself first, and how to decide what you’re actually willing to live with. You’ll learn how to speak up when it matters, let go when it doesn’t, and manage your own mind so you can stay grounded without burning out trying to fix people who aren’t ready to change.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/431Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Friction feels annoying, stressful, and uncomfortable, but it is also where real growth happens. In this episode, I show you how to stop avoiding discomfort and start using it to build confidence, resilience, and stronger connections. You’ll learn why your brain resists effort and failure, how to reframe frustration as progress, and simple ways to practice tolerating and even seeking out productive friction. By the end, you’ll see why the challenges you face are exactly what make you stronger and more capable. Let's go!Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/430The Socratic Coaching Method Certification: thesocraticcoachingacademy.comFollow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil

If you’ve ever wanted to work with me, help people live freer, more empowered lives, and be part of a team that actually changes the world, this is your chance. We’re hiring for two key roles: a CEO/EOS integrator and a Program Manager.If you’re resourceful, a self-starter, and obsessed with creating impact, head to unfuckyourbrain.com/hiring to see the details and apply. This could be your next big move!

We spend so much time telling ourselves how other people should act and it keeps us frustrated, anxious, and stuck. In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I answer two listener questions that expose this trap. One caller is constantly angry about her partner’s availability, the other worries that her friends aren’t putting in as much effort as her. Both show how our expectations about how others behave can hijack our emotions and cloud our judgment. Tune in to hear why trying to control or judge other people never works - and what actually does. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/429Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Ever feel like you’re constantly giving love, safety, or approval away, but never getting enough back? Today’s guest is Bea Albina, author of the brand-new book End Emotional Outsourcing: How to Overcome Your Codependent, Perfectionist, and People-Pleasing Habits. We’re breaking down emotional outsourcing, the habit of looking outside yourself for validation, and how it secretly shapes your relationships, work, and sense of self.We dig into practical ways to reconnect with your body, notice what you actually want, and reclaim your inner authority. You’ll get tools to break patterns of people-pleasing and perfectionism, shift how you relate to others, and start living from a place of self-trust rather than external approval.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/427Get Bea's new book here: beatrizalbina.com/bookThe Socratic Coaching Method Certification: thesocraticcoachingacademy.comFollow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil

Ever been told to “just get over it” and felt like it made everything worse? In this week’s Coaching Hotline, I answer a listener who’s struggling with that exact phrase and the pressure to move on before they’re ready. We dig into why vague instructions like this don’t help your brain—and what actually does.I also tackle a question about imagined critics and the way we judge ourselves through faceless others. Tune in to reclaim your authority over your thoughts, and discover the tools to stop letting your brain run the show.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/427Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

In this Greatest Hits episode, we’re diving into the science behind why coaching works—and why it can completely transform high-pressure careers. I’m revisiting my conversation with Dr. Tyra Fainstad and Dr. Adrienne Mann about their groundbreaking research, published in the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA), and how structured coaching can change not just individual outcomes, but entire organizational cultures. Tune in to discover what their study revealed about coaching’s real-world impact, why traditional systems often leave women disproportionately stressed, and how coaching can produce measurable improvements in both performance and well-being.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/426The Socratic Coaching Method Certification: thesocraticcoachingacademy.com/Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Do you ever feel like you're chasing future happiness—only to miss out on the joy of right now? That nagging feeling that you should be doing something else or preparing for what’s next keeps you stuck in a loop of dissatisfaction.In this week's Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two questions about being present and actually enjoying life, instead of endlessly striving for the next goal. I break down why our brains love to sabotage our peace and show you how to create mental space and challenge the beliefs that keep you from being present.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/425

IT'S HERE! My new book "Take Back Your Brain: How a Sexist Society Gets in Your Head... and How to Get it Out" is officially available as an audiobook and hardcover wherever books and audiobooks are sold!