#68: Romance vs BDSM - Which is More Intimate?

Send us a textIn this week’s episode, Harley Rabbit takes a deep dive into the world of sexual fantasies and reveals one of her most provocative ones—a cock worship scenario rooted in her submissive desires.Harley discusses how fantasies can unlock deeper arousal, help you connect with your core desires, and transform your sex life—whether you're indulging solo or with a partner. She explores why fantasising is healthy, how it doesn’t reflect your real-life values, and how to incorporate your imagination into sex without needing an elaborate setup.Plus, Harley shares practical tips on using props, positions, and gestures to amplify your fantasies and make them even more immersive.Mentioned in this episode:FetLife Writing: Explore the full details of Harley’s cock worship fantasy on her FetLife profile @harleyrabbit Kink Coaching: Want to uncover your core desires and craft your "hottest sexual movie"? Book a free connection call with Harley at HarleyRabbit.com.Episode #49: How to Give INSANE Blowjobs - Even If You Can’t Deep ThroatContact Harleyrabbit.com Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on Instagram

Send us a textIn this episode of Turns Out I’m Into It, Harley Rabbit takes on some of the most stubborn myths and misconceptions about women’s sexuality. Whether you’re a woman navigating these expectations or a man eager to understand your partner better, this episode is for you.Harley shares her personal experiences and insights from studying sexology, conversations with clients and friends, and challenges commonly held beliefs that might be holding you back from a more fulfilling sex life.You’ll hear about:Why being multi-orgasmic isn’t the ultimate goal for everyone.Why “She Comes First” is well-intentioned but not always the best approach.How objectification, when done consensually, can actually boost confidence and connection.Why putting women on a pedestal creates imbalance and prevents authentic intimacy.Contact Harleyrabbit.com Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on Instagram

Send us a textIn this empowering episode, Harley Rabbit dives into the topic of sex positivity and overcoming shame around sexuality. Sharing personal stories, including a formative memory from high school and a transformative recent experience in a burlesque dance class, Harley explores how societal messages shape our views on expressing sexuality. Harley reflects on reclaiming self-confidence and finding permission to be authentically sexy in a world that often discourages it.Referenced in this episodeChristina Agulara - Genie in a BottleThe Vavoom Room - Burlesque Dance Studio Townsville HarleyRabbit.com – Book a free connection call.The Animal Game - Somatica® Exercise watch on YoutubeContact Harleyrabbit.com Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on Instagram

Send us a textIn this episode, Harley Rabbit opens up about finally getting her first tattoo—a significant milestone that stirred up childhood memories and beliefs. Harley reflects on how her journey into kink and pain play has reshaped her understanding of resilience, pain, and bravery. Sharing stories about childhood fears, needle phobias, and reclaiming agency through kink, Harley discusses how these experiences helped overcome lifelong limiting beliefs.Tune in for an honest, empowering discussion about using kink as a way to challenge old narratives, embrace your strength, and celebrate your journey. Plus, hear updates on Harley’s coaching journey, Somatica training, and her battles with challenges in the adult industry. Resources Mentioned:Book Recommendation: The Way Out by Alan Gordon for chronic pain management.HarleyRabbit.com – Book a free connection call.Find tattoo pictures on Harley’s Instagram and Fetlife profiles.Contact Harleyrabbit.com Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on Instagram

Send us a textIn this episode, Harley dives into a fun yet insightful analysis of three popular love songs that might make you rethink your playlist: I Lose Control by Teddy Swims, Elastic Heart by Sia, and Grenade by Bruno Mars. Taking on the role of a relationship coach, Harley imagines these song lyrics as if they were clients sitting in a therapy session, sharing their romantic struggles.Harley explores how these songs, while catchy and romantic on the surface, often glorify toxic behaviors that we’ve come to accept as ‘normal’ in love stories. From possessive jealousy and feeling out of control to shaming, blaming, and self-sacrifice, these songs highlight common patterns that are often romanticized in music but can be damaging in real relationships.Tune in for a mix of humor, raw honesty, and relationship wisdom as Harley breaks down why we should pay closer attention to the messaging in the love songs we adore. You'll never hear these tracks the same way again! (Written by AI)Mentioned in this EpisodeLoose Control - Teddy SwimsElastic Heart - SiaGrenade - Bruno MarsContact Harleyrabbit.com Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on Instagram

Send us a textCNC (Consensual Non-Consent) is often discussed from a woman’s perspective, but what about men? In this episode, I’m joined by Dotch, a Somatica® practitioner who once saw CNC as a hard limit but has since learned to enjoy facilitating these fantasies. Dotch shares his journey, from initial discomfort to embracing CNC in a way that feels safe, consensual, and exciting. We discuss the challenges men face, including shame and the fear of crossing boundaries, and offer insights on how to explore CNC responsibly. Tune in for a thoughtful, candid conversation on navigating CNC from a man’s point of view.Mentioned in this EpisodeBeginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)Beginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)Somatica®Somatica® BDSM Mastery CourseEmily Tesh - Some Desperate Glory (book)Contact Sexandmischief.coach (Dotch’s website)Harleyrabbit.com (My website)Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on Instagram

Send us a textIn this episode, Harley Rabbit delves into the concept of intimacy within the kink and BDSM communities, challenging common misconceptions that equate kink with violence and degradation. Harley emphasizes that true intimacy in kink is built on trust, vulnerability, and open communication. The discussion explores various forms of intimacy that can arise in kink, including the exploration of personal limits and the importance of aftercare. Harley also shares personal experiences that highlight how kink can foster deeper connections and accelerate feelings of intimacy between partners.If you are interested in exploring some CNC roleplays with a trusted partner, I am hosting an online workshop in October. You can get tickets here:Beginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)Beginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)Contact Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on InstagramFollow me on X

Send us a textI got up to some exciting kinky shenanigans this weekend and I can’t wait to share! Slade and I did our most elaborate roleplay yet, which was a CNC schoolgirl fantasy. This has been a fantasy of mine for a long time, and was also my first time exploring middlespace. In this episode I share the details of the roleplay and what I learned, as well as how it felt to explore a more complicated for of ageplay where I was actually getting to sooth some old wounds using the repetition with agency pathway. If you are interested in exploring some CNC roleplays with a trusted partner, I am hosting an online workshop in October. You can get tickets here:Beginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)Mentioned in this episode Join my mailing list here3 Part Trauma Mini-Series#44: When Bad Feels Really Good - kink is NOT Abuse#45: The Truth About Turn Ons#46: Strength in Darkness - Soothing Trauma with BDSMBeginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)Contact Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on InstagramFollow me on X

Send us a textIn this episode, I talk with Jeanne Baade, a sex and relationship coach who discovered her sexuality later in life after growing up in a conservative christian household. Jeanne shares how she first experienced a clitoral orgasm at 48, and her journey into kink and BDSM. We explore simple ways for beginners to dip their toe into BDSM, like using blindfolds, scarves and rope harnesses to build trust and connection with a partner.Jeanne’s humour and storytelling make this conversation both insightful and engaging, offering relatable advice for anyone curious about exploring kink. Whether you're new to BDSM or looking to reignite your relationship, Jeanne’s wisdom provides a welcoming introduction to this world.Mentioned in this episodeIntimate Unicorn websiteFollow Jeanne on Instagram @intimateunicorn Follow Jeanne on Facebook Obedience (app)Come Together - Emily NagoskiCome As You Are - Emily Nagoski Contact Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on InstagramFollow me on X

Send us a textIn this episode, we’re diving into a topic that might not be the sexiest, but it’s crucial for anyone exploring their sexuality, especially in non-monogamous relationships. I’m joined by Dr. Sara Whitburn, a General Practitioner specialising in sexual health and the Deputy Medical Director at Sexual Health Victoria, to tackle all the awkward questions about STIs.We’ll be covering what you need to know about common STIs, including what you should be testing for and how often. Dr. Sara answers those burning questions like, “How risky is oral sex without condoms?” and “Can I get genital herpes if my partner gives me oral with a cold sore?” If you have an active sx life with multiple partners, or just want to stay informed, this episode is a must-listen. Being educated about STIs allows us to make informed decisions about the risks we’re willing to take and how we negotiate boundaries with our partners.Mentioned in this episodeSexual Health Victoria websiteHerpes Foundation New ZealandBetter Health Channel (sexual communication)Sexual Health Victoria on Instagram (@sexualhealthvictoria)Sexual Health Victoria on YoutubeSexual Health Victoria on TikTok (@shvic.org.au)Contact Sign up to my NewsletterFollow me on FetlifeFollow me on InstagramFollow me on X