S4: Normalize "Bad Women" with Rebecca Woolf

Being a widow is complicated. On top of the earth-shattering grief you experience, there’s a huge societal pressure to be the perfect image of a grieving partner, missing the love of your life. But what if the person who died was actually kind of a huge jerk? How do you take care of someone who doesn’t really deserve it? And what does it mean to be a good woman or a good widow? ⁠All of This: A Memoir of Death and Desire by Rebecca Woolf⁠ ⁠The Widow's Guide to Dead Bastards by Jessica Waite – Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program is ranked among the nation's top 8% of graduate social work programs by the U.S. News & World Report. With three New York campuses, plus hybrid and fully online options, Fordham’s flexible program works with your schedule to help you earn a degree on your timeline. Our evening and weekend part-time study plan is ideal for working adults, with most students maintaining employment throughout their education.  Learn more about Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program at: fordham.edu/TTFA. _ Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When Laura gets a call from the hospital telling her that her dad has severe frostbite and could die, Laura is shocked. Not because of the whole frostbite part ... but because her dad is alive. She hasn't seen or talked to him in years and honestly assumed he was long dead.  This is a story about what happens when we realize our parents are, in fact, real people — and that real people mess up and make mistakes.  Originally published 6/5/2018 – Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program is ranked among the nation's top 8% of graduate social work programs by the U.S. News & World Report. With three New York campuses, plus hybrid and fully online options, Fordham’s flexible program works with your schedule to help you earn a degree on your timeline. Our evening and weekend part-time study plan is ideal for working adults, with most students maintaining employment throughout their education.  Learn more about Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program at: fordham.edu/TTFA. _ Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After fertility treatments fail, Deya and Sandra decide to adopt a child through the foster system. They have a lot of love to give. They also know the intended outcome of foster care is for the child to reunite with their birth family.When Deya and Sandra begin fostering a baby girl, they try to not get too attached ... but it's SO hard. And as the baby's birth mother works toward reunification, the women are torn. They want the young mother to succeed. They believe in reunification! They also fear losing the baby girl they've come to deeply love. Originally published 2/26/2019 – Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program is ranked among the nation's top 8% of graduate social work programs by the U.S. News & World Report. With three New York campuses, plus hybrid and fully online options, Fordham’s flexible program works with your schedule to help you earn a degree on your timeline. Our evening and weekend part-time study plan is ideal for working adults, with most students maintaining employment throughout their education.  Learn more about Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program at: fordham.edu/TTFA. _ Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kelsey and Louie’s life is blessedly boring in the best kind of way. They have good jobs. They live in the suburbs. They have a kid.  When Kelsey gets pregnant again, everything changes. Not just because they’re about to go from one kid to two, but because Kelsey isn’t feeling well. She’s diagnosed with Guillain-Barre syndrome.  Some changes you anticipate. They are eagerly awaited — like a pregnancy. And some changes just jump out at you and turn everything upside down.  Originally published 9/24/2019 – Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program is ranked among the nation's top 8% of graduate social work programs by the U.S. News & World Report. With three New York campuses, plus hybrid and fully online options, Fordham’s flexible program works with your schedule to help you earn a degree on your timeline. Our evening and weekend part-time study plan is ideal for working adults, with most students maintaining employment throughout their education.  Learn more about Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program at: fordham.edu/TTFA. _ Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Gina became a caregiver at a young age.  By age 6, she was emotionally responsible for her mother, her brothers and herself, and she learned to mute her own needs for the sake of others.  As an adult, she’s still shaking off the long-term effects of being parentified and learning to attend to her own human needs.  You can read Gina’s work at http://ginadwagner.com/  Originally published 3/2/2021  – Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program is ranked among the nation's top 8% of graduate social work programs by the U.S. News & World Report. With three New York campuses, plus hybrid and fully online options, Fordham’s flexible program works with your schedule to help you earn a degree on your timeline. Our evening and weekend part-time study plan is ideal for working adults, with most students maintaining employment throughout their education.  Learn more about Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program at: fordham.edu/TTFA. _ Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all want a good death — a death where we’re surrounded by the people we love and don’t feel any fear or pain.  A good death is what Ron Deprez wanted when his body became ravaged by ALS… and thanks to his daughter, Esmé, and Maine’s death with dignity legislation, that’s exactly what he got.  In this episode, Esmé Deprez shares her father’s story with us. Esmé is a very talented writer and journalist. You can read her Bloomberg article about her dad here.  Originally published 4/27/2021 – Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program is ranked among the nation's top 8% of graduate social work programs by the U.S. News & World Report. With three New York campuses, plus hybrid and fully online options, Fordham’s flexible program works with your schedule to help you earn a degree on your timeline. Our evening and weekend part-time study plan is ideal for working adults, with most students maintaining employment throughout their education.  Learn more about Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program at: fordham.edu/TTFA. _ Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Melissa is the epitome of responsible. She loves following rules and has spent her whole life trying to be the best person possible. But accidents happen, and one winter morning, a split second changes everything she thought she knew about herself.  Originally published 8/31/2021 – Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program is ranked among the nation's top 8% of graduate social work programs by the U.S. News & World Report. With three New York campuses, plus hybrid and fully online options, Fordham’s flexible program works with your schedule to help you earn a degree on your timeline. Our evening and weekend part-time study plan is ideal for working adults, with most students maintaining employment throughout their education.  Learn more about Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program at: fordham.edu/TTFA. _ Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Damon’s grandparents were murdered 18 months before he was born. He never knew them, but their deaths — and the trial for their killer — defined much of his childhood.  For nearly three decades, Damon’s mother has attended every parole hearing to deliver a victim impact statement.  When we meet Damon, there is another such hearing coming up, but his mother is unable to attend. For the first time in his life, Damon prepares to see his grandparents’ murderer face to face.   Originally published 1/23/2017 – Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program is ranked among the nation's top 8% of graduate social work programs by the U.S. News & World Report. With three New York campuses, plus hybrid and fully online options, Fordham’s flexible program works with your schedule to help you earn a degree on your timeline. Our evening and weekend part-time study plan is ideal for working adults, with most students maintaining employment throughout their education.  Learn more about Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program at: fordham.edu/TTFA. _ Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's been a few years since we last spoke with Hayley Paige about the legal battle that took her ideas, her job and her identity. In this episode, we get an update from Hayley. And we get to use her actual name! You can shop for Hayley Paige dresses at hayleypaige.com – Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jeremy Norton has been a firefighter for over 20 years, a job that’s considered heroic and honorable … a job that sometimes means showing up to a false alarm … and sometimes means soaking up the trauma of the city around you. Jeremy has been a TTFA listener since day one. His first book — The Trauma Sponges: Dispatches From The Scarred Heart of Emergency Response — was published October 10, 2023. This episode was originally published on September 18, 2023. _ Work is, to most of us, an important part of our lives. We spend something like a third of our lives at work, and even if we’re not working our “dream job” our work gives us a sense of purpose, accomplishment…and – oh, yeah – money to survive. But work – finding it, doing it, losing it – can also be a huge source of stress. This season, we’re exploring what happens when work goes wrong. These are real stories from real people sharing the reality of work, brought to you by Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program. Big thanks to our sponsor, Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program.  Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program is ranked among the nation's top 8% of graduate social work programs by the U.S. News & World Report. With three New York campuses, plus hybrid and fully online options, Fordham’s flexible program works with your schedule to help you earn a degree on your timeline. Our evening and weekend part-time study plan is ideal for working adults, with most students maintaining employment throughout their education.  Learn more about Fordham University’s Master of Social Work program at: fordham.edu/TTFA. – Find Nora’s weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ The Feelings & Co. team is Nora McInerny, Marcel Malekebu and Grace Barry. _ Find all our shows at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices