S8 BONUS: A Conversation from Quiet the Clock with Beth Gulotta

Today’s episode is something a little different. I’m sharing a bonus conversation that was recorded for another podcast, Quiet the Clock, created by psychotherapist Beth Gulotta. Because Beth’s work and mine overlap in such meaningful ways, we decided to release this interview on both of our feeds today.If you’re new to Quiet the Clock, it’s a deeply thoughtful space for women who are feeling the pressure of fertility timelines, missed milestones, and the quiet (or not-so-quiet) grief that can come with life unfolding differently than expected. In other words, it’s a space that will likely feel very familiar if you’re listening to this show.Beth helps women question and rewrite the stories that no longer serve them, creating room for a life that actually fits — one grounded in self-trust, empowerment, and choosing your own timing. Her personal journey, combined with her clinical background, makes her a steady and compassionate voice in a space that truly needs more of both.You’ll also be hearing from Beth again next week when she joins me as a guest on The Single Greatest Choice, so this is a beautiful introduction to her work and perspective.After you listen, be sure to follow Quiet the Clock wherever you get your podcasts and explore more of Beth’s episodes. If you’re here, I have a feeling her work will resonate deeply.Podcast - Quiet The Clock Podcast

The search for a sperm donor can be overwhelming for anyone, but for Black women, the lack of available Black donors adds a whole new layer of complexity. When Lakia Holmes—senior producer of Bleacher Report’s branded sports content, award-winning journalist, and now a single mom by choice—began exploring her fertility options at 37, she had no idea just how winding the path would be.What started as an egg-freezing consultation quickly revealed blocked fallopian tubes and a 2% chance of conceiving naturally. Suddenly, the dream she’d been putting off to grow her career became something she could no longer wait on. Choosing IVF meant choosing herself—and stepping into the unknown as a solo Black woman navigating infertility, donor scarcity, and the fear of how this choice might impact her career.In our conversation, Lakia shares the emotional and logistical realities of that season: long donor waitlists, genetic mismatches, profiles with only a name or two left… and then the moment a miracle phone call changed everything.“It wasn’t my plan A, but my plan B worked out pretty damn well.” — LakiaLakia opens up about the fast-moving year that followed—egg retrievals, her very first embryo transfer, and the shock and gratitude of being pregnant with her daughter, Isla, who arrived in May 2024. She also speaks honestly about postpartum depression, rebuilding her support system, heading back to work in the sports media world, and dipping her toe back into dating as an SMBC.Most recently featured in Forbes, Lakia is now using her platform to bring fertility awareness to the Black community and to tell the story she once needed to hear.Her honesty, humor, and courage offer such a powerful reminder: when you decide your dream of becoming a mother can’t wait any longer, so much becomes possible.In this episode, we explore:How an egg-freezing consult revealed blocked fallopian tubesRecognizing that waiting for the “right time” or the “right partner” might mean waiting foreverWhy Black sperm donors are so scarce—and how that impacts Black women pursuing donor conceptionFinding a donor when the options feel impossibly limitedGetting pregnant on her very first embryo transferLakia’s experiences during pregnancy and birthPostpartum depression and learning to ask for helpReturning to work, navigating childcare, and preparing to travel againReentering the dating world as a solo mom by choiceFind out more about Lakia’s coaching at Lakia Holmes | Fertility Coach, Speaker & Advocate👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice support you’ve been craving for every stage of your journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats for early stage SMBCs and Family Trips for moms & kids.💌Become part of the SGC community and stay up to date by joining our newsletter. You can sign up >>here<< at the bottom of the page.Reach out to Katie over at [email protected]

Do you ever wonder what solo motherhood by choice looks like further down the line? I certainly do, and today's episode with a SMBC of a teen was a fascinating window into that world.Today’s guest, Elle, became a single mother by choice at 36, using a known sperm donor: someone she briefly dated years before. Today, her son is 13, and her story gives us a rare, honest look at what life can look like after the decision is made and we leave the diaper years behind us. I love how open Elle is in sharing the beautiful, the complicated, the surprising, and everything in between. From managing pregnancy and postpartum alone and watching her son’s relationship with his donor evolve, to navigating school choices, identity questions, and early teenage years.If you’ve ever wondered whether a known sperm donor could work for you, or you’re simply craving a long-term perspective from someone further down the solo motherhood path, Elle’s story offers us a peek into what it can look like.In this episode on solo parenting a teenager and choosing a known sperm donor, we discuss:How Elle decided to pursue solo motherhood at 36;Why she chose a known donor over a sperm bank and how she went about it;What the donor relationship looked like during pregnancy and postpartum;Her son’s evolving understanding of who his “donor” or “dad” is;Legal considerations (and misconceptions) around known sperm donors;Navigating boundaries, expectations, and emotional complexity over 13 years;Identity, gender expression, and raising a compassionate son;The challenges and rewards of solo parenting an older child;Trusting yourself through big parenting and school decisions;And much more.👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice support you’ve been craving for every stage of your journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats for early stage SMBCs and Family Trips for moms & kids.💌Become part of the SGC community and stay up to date by joining our newsletter. You can sign up >>here<< at the bottom of the page.Reach out to Katie over at [email protected]

What would you have to change to make solo motherhood possible? For novelist Tory Henwood Hoen, the answer meant reimagining the structure of her life. She left New York City for Vermont, moved in with her mom during pregnancy, and built a rhythm that allowed her to pursue both her dream of motherhood and her passion for writing. Through it all, she discovered that becoming a single mother by choice isn’t just about making one big decision, but rather about creating space for what truly matters.In today’s conversation, Tory shares how she built a life that supports solo motherhood: from freezing her eggs at 36, doing IVF at 39, and getting pregnant with her first transfer, to writing her second novel while parenting. Her story is a beautiful reminder that sometimes the path that looks like starting over is actually the one that leads you home to yourself.In this episode on building a life that supports solo motherhood, we discuss:The emotional and practical steps that led Tory to pursue motherhood on her own;Moving from New York City to Vermont to prioritize family, finances, and creative space;Writing her second novel while parenting a newborn, and how motherhood sharpened her creative focus;The importance of community and connection in the SMBC journey;Redefining success and identity in midlife;Creating space for what matters most;And more.More about ToryTory Henwood Hoen is a novelist based in Vermont, where she is a solo mother by choice to her toddler daughter. Her debut novel, THE ARC, was published in 2022, and her second novel, BEFORE I FORGET, comes out December 2, 2025. Before pursuing her dream of writing books, Tory worked as a magazine editor, a brand director, a copywriter, and a content consultant in New York City and Paris.You can learn more about Tory and her work on her website or connect with her on Instagram (@toryhenwoodhoen).👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice support you’ve been craving for every stage of your journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats for early stage SMBCs and Family Trips for moms & kids.💌Become part of the SGC community and stay up to date by joining our newsletter. You can sign up >>here<< at the bottom of the page.Reach out to Katie over at [email protected]

While some motherhood paths unfold easily, others bring unexpected twists and turns. Dr. Shanelle Bolton’s path to solo motherhood included multiple surgeries to remove fibroids, a chemical pregnancy, and even a near-fatal postpartum hemorrhage. But all of this was part of her journey, and today she’s a proud solo mom by choice to two thriving children. In the midst of it all, she also founded POSH Parenthood, where she helps families move from chaos to calm through purposeful rhythms and executive functioning support for kids.Shanelle shares how she turned her challenges into a mission: empowering parents to create calmer, more connected homes without chasing perfection. Her story is a reminder that the path isn’t always smooth and straightforward, but that doesn’t mean it won’t get us to where we want to go.In this episode on Shanelle’s journey to becoming a solo mom of two, you’ll hear:Deciding to become a solo mom by choice and building a support system to make it happen;Navigating an IVF journey with fibroids and multiple surgeries;Coping with a chemical pregnancy and postpartum hemorrhage;How Shanelle re-imagined her career after losing her job and founded POSH Parenthood;Why flexible parenting rhythms work better than rigid routines;Understanding executive functioning for kids and how it helps parents, too;The importance of Black maternal health and self-advocacy in motherhood;And more!More about Dr. Shanelle BoltonDr. Shanelle Bolton, EdD, MST, MLS is the founder and CEO of POSH Parenthood Coaching & Consulting, where she helps parents and educators move from chaos to calm by building purposeful family rhythms and strengthening children’s executive functioning skills. With over two decades of experience in education and early childhood leadership, she blends professional expertise with personal resilience as a single mother by choice who navigated IVF, pregnancy loss, and a near-fatal postpartum complication. Through high-touch coaching, courses, and her signature Raising in Rhythm program, Dr. Bolton empowers families to find flow, connection, and confidence in parenting.Ways to connect with Shanelle:🌐 Website: poshparenthood.com📸 Instagram: @poshparenthood🎥 TikTok: @poshparenthood📘 Featured Resource: Raising Brighter Minds eBook✨ Signature Program: Raising in Rhythm 👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice support you’ve been craving for every stage of your journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats

After a pregnancy marked by hyperemesis and countless challenges, Mel Anderson returns to share the next chapter of her story. This time, it’s a much brighter one.The birth of Mel’s daughter didn’t go exactly as planned, but from the very first moment she heard her daughter’s cry, everything shifted. Instead of bracing herself for postpartum depression, Mel was surprised to feel a rush of love and relief.The weeks that followed became a season of healing and sweetness, allowing herself to recover slowly. She discovered how much she loves the simple rhythms of newborn life, and how motherhood has brought her more presence and joy than she ever imagined.Now, eight months in, Mel is not only thriving as a mom, but she’s reconnecting with her passion for yoga: dreaming of ways to guide other single mothers by choice through movement, breath, and grounding practices designed especially for this community.In this episode on Mel’s postpartum experience as a single mother by choice, you’ll hear about:Recovering physically and emotionally after a difficult pregnancy and birthThe unexpected sweetness of newborn life and early motherhoodDaily rituals of connection and presence with her daughterHow Mel is dreaming of a platform to support SMBCs through yoga and meditationAnd much more!👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice resource you’ve been craving for every stage of your SMBC journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats for early stage SMBCs and Family Trips for moms & kids.🏘️Join our community, The SGC VillageReach out to Katie over at [email protected]

Pregnancy doesn’t always go the way you imagined it would. For my dear friend and fellow SMBC, Mel Anderson, what began with excitement quickly turned into one of the hardest seasons of her life. Instead of hiking and practicing yoga through her pregnancy as she had envisioned, Mel faced hyperemesis: severe nausea and vomiting that left her unable to care for herself, barely able to eat or drink, and often confined to the bathroom floor.⚠️Before we dive in, a gentle heads up: this episode includes a detailed discussion of hyperemesis and the mental health struggles that can come with a difficult pregnancy. If you’re feeling particularly anxious about pregnancy, this might not be the right episode for you. And if you’re currently in the middle of a hard pregnancy yourself, please know there is relief and joy on the other side (which you’ll hear about in the next episode, in which we’ll continue with Mel’s story).In this deeply vulnerable conversation, Mel shares what it was really like to go through pregnancy without a partner while navigating a condition that tested her body, her mental health, and her spirit. From the heartbreak of canceled embryo transfers to the unexpected challenges of her pregnancy, her story is raw, honest, and important.If you’re considering solo motherhood, pregnant yourself, or simply want to know you’re not alone in facing a difficult path, this conversation will remind you that strength can grow even in the hardest places.In this episode on Mel’s story about her pregnancy without a partner, we discuss:Mel’s path to becoming a single mother by choice after ambivalence about having children in her younger years;How Mel’s relationship history played into the decision;Being diagnosed with hyperemesis and how it shaped her pregnancy;Mental health struggles and learning to advocate for herself in the medical system;The critical role of support during a high-risk pregnancy as a solo mom;Why sharing the hard stories matters just as much as sharing the joyful ones;And more.👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice resource you’ve been craving for every stage of your SMBC journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats for early stage SMBCs and Family Trips for moms & kids.🏘️Join our community, The SGC VillageReach out to Katie over at [email protected]

Motherhood—especially solo motherhood—rarely unfolds exactly the way we imagined. Fertility treatments don’t always go as planned, babies don’t follow sleep schedules, and even our best-laid visions of how life “should” look often get disrupted.In this episode, I’m sharing one of our private Village Podcast episodes on the theme of Managing Expectations and Embracing Flexibility. Inside The Village, each month we take on a broad coaching topic that applies across every stage of the solo motherhood journey, from considering this path to parenting young children. Along with a monthly coaching episode like this one, members also receive a companion workbook and access to an entire library of past themes.In today’s conversation, you’ll hear about:Releasing unrealistic expectations of perfection, both in parenting and in lifeBuilding resilience when things don’t go according to plan (another failed transfer, a toddler meltdown, or changes in your own path to motherhood)Practical ways to adjust plans with more ease and less pressureLearning to “ride the wave” of unpredictability, even when it feels uncomfortableWhether you’re just beginning to imagine solo motherhood or you’re deep in the day-to-day of raising your child, this episode will help you soften rigid expectations, prioritize what matters most, and find more peace in the process.And if you love this episode and want more like it, I’d love to welcome you inside The Village—a community designed to support women at every stage of the journey with resources, coaching, and connection.👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice resource you’ve been craving for every stage of your SMBC journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats for early stage SMBCs and Family Trips for moms & kids.🏘️Join our community, The SGC VillageReach out to Katie over at [email protected]

Even with careful planning, none of us can predict how our path to motherhood will unfold.When we last spoke with Tara Resnick, she was preparing for another egg retrieval and left us with quite the cliffhanger. Today, she’s back to share the next chapter of her journey toward solo motherhood.In this conversation, Tara speaks with honesty and vulnerability about the setbacks she’s faced—multiple egg retrievals, the financial strain of treatment, and the deep emotional toll of pursuing IVF as a single woman at 42. She also opens up about the regrets she carries: wishing she had pursued IVF or at least frozen eggs earlier, and staying in relationships longer than she now wishes she had.What makes Tara’s story so powerful is not a picture-perfect narrative, but her willingness to share the messy middle—the heartbreak, the resilience it takes to keep going, and the importance of self-compassion when the outcome is still unknown.Tara’s reminder for all of us: resilience isn’t about toxic positivity. It’s about choosing yourself, holding onto hope, and finding peace even in the hardest seasons.“Choose yourself, always.” – Tara ResnickIf you’ve ever wondered what it’s really like to walk through IVF on your own—the ups, the setbacks, the financial and emotional weight—I hope this conversation will make you feel less alone.In this episode, we discuss:Tara’s second and third egg retrievals, including the unexpected decision to pursue a Duo Stim cycleThe financial and emotional impact of IVF as a single womanThe vulnerability of navigating fertility treatments without a partnerReceiving difficult PGT results and the decision to transfer an untested embryoHow to balance hope and grief without falling into toxic positivityWhy Tara believes trying was still the right choice for her, no matter the outcomeAnd moreConnect with Tara: Instagram | @TaraLaurennnSimple Coaching for Health & Weight LossEvolve with Tara: Solution Focused Coaching👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice resource you’ve been craving for every stage of your SMBC journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats for early stage SMBCs and Family Trips for moms & kids.🏘️Join our community, The SGC VillageReach out to Katie over at [email protected]

Julie thought she was freezing her eggs for a future partner.Instead, she ended up fertilizing all of them on her path to become a mom on her own—then finding love and partnership afterward.That’s the short version of Julie Ferguson’s story, but there’s so much more to it.Julie is a PR firm owner and solo mom by choice who’s been through more than her share of plot twists on the road to motherhood: divorce, miscarriage, five egg retrievals, two IVF cycles, and one hard-won embryo that became her son. She opens up about what it really took—emotionally, physically, and financially—to make her dream of motherhood happen.And her story doesn’t end there.Now a proud mom to a two-year-old, Julie shares what it’s been like to date as a solo mom, including an unplanned pregnancy at 45 and the evolving relationship that followed. We talk about rediscovering yourself in motherhood, building connections with other donor sibling families, and Julie’s advocacy work with the Stork Foundation, which helps families access IVF through grants.Whether you’re still navigating fertility as a single woman or already parenting solo, Julie’s mix of honesty, humor, and hope is one you don’t want to miss.In this episode, we cover:Navigating miscarriage, divorce, and solo motherhood during the pandemicDoing multiple egg retrievals and two rounds of IVF in her early 40sThe emotional toll of losing an embryo and trying againMaking the leap from egg freezing to IVF with donor spermAdvocating for IVF access through the Stork FoundationDating as a solo mom and navigating an unexpected pregnancy at 45Building a donor sibling community and raising a happy toddler soloWhy prioritizing self-care matters in solo motherhoodAnd moreResources mentioned:The Stork FoundationLittle Words Project - Hope BraceletSociety for Assisted Reproductive Technology (SART)It Starts With the Egg BookPulling Down the Moon Holistic Fertility CenterConnect with Julie: Instagram: @chijulesJulie’s PR Firm👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice resource you’ve been craving for every stage of your SMBC journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats for early stage SMBCs and Family Trips for moms &amp; kids.🏘️Join our community, The SGC VillageReach out to Katie over at <a href="mailto:[email protected]" rel="noopener noreferrer"...