How to Balance Feelings and Fun in Non-monogamy

In this enlightening episode of the OpenLove101 podcast, hosts John and Jackie Melfi address a thought-provoking question from a viewer about managing emotions as an external play partner in an open relationship. With their 20+ years of combined experience in open relationships, they offer valuable insights on maintaining boundaries while acknowledging natural human emotions. The hosts discuss the challenges of a play partner who has been in a relationship for 1.5 years with strict rules about emotional involvement, and explore whether it's truly possible to maintain a purely physical connection over an extended period. John and Jackie emphasize the importance of honest communication and the natural development of feelings in any human interaction. Key Topics Discussed: 🕒 0:00 - Introduction to Open Love 101 podcast 🗣️ 0:40 - John introduces a viewer question about being an external play partner 💬 2:21 - Discussion about communication being key in any relationship 💭 4:41 - Can relationships truly exist without emotions? 🔄 8:02 - The challenges of separating emotions from physical relationships 🛣️ 11:16 - Common boundaries in new open relationships 🤝 13:06 - Advice on having honest conversations with partners Whether you're new to consensual non-monogamy or a seasoned practitioner, this episode provides thoughtful perspectives on managing emotions and relationships in the lifestyle. 👍 If you enjoyed this episode, please LIKE this video and SUBSCRIBE to our channel for more insights on open relationships and the swinger lifestyle. Share your thoughts or questions in the comments below! Visit openlove101.com to learn more about open relationships and join our email list for updates on new content.

How Swinging Strengthened Our Trust & Emotional Connection | John & Jackie | OpenLove101 Can swinging lead to more emotional intimacy? In this video, John and Jackie from OpenLove101.com share how their open relationship has created a deeper sense of honesty, trust, and personal growth. Unlike traditional monogamous relationships where conversations about outside attraction are often avoided, John and Jackie embrace openness—creating a safe space for vulnerability, acceptance, and unconditional love. They discuss how this emotional freedom has transformed their connection and invite viewers to challenge societal norms around relationships. 💬 Real trust begins when you're free to be completely honest. #OpenLove101 #SwingingLifestyle #EmotionalIntimacy #RelationshipTrust #NonMonogamy #JohnAndJackie #OpenRelationships #UnconditionalLove

Join hosts John and Jackie Melfi, the force behind Colette Swingers Clubs and the award-winning blog OpenLove101.com, as they discuss common misconceptions about consensual non-monogamy. With over 20 years of combined experience in open relationships and coaching thousands of couples, John and Jackie tackle the judgmental statements and questions they hear repeatedly. In this episode, they address myths like "that is disgusting," explore jealousy in open relationships, discuss how they handle conversations with their children, and much more. Whether you're curious about alternative relationship models or already living the lifestyle, this episode offers valuable insights on communication, boundaries, and navigating relationships with honesty. TIMESTAMPS: [00:00:00] Podcast introduction [00:00:48] Topic: Things people say about swingers [00:01:27] Addressing "That is disgusting, I would never let my partner do that" [00:06:23] Tackling "Don't you get jealous?" misconception [00:13:09] Discussing "Do you tell your children?" [00:17:53] Addressing "You must be sexual deviants" [00:20:26] Handling "I don't feel comfortable being around you anymore" John and Jackie emphasize the importance of communication in any relationship model and share how couples can set boundaries that work for them. They discuss how jealousy is often an umbrella term for deeper feelings like insecurity, and how facing these emotions head-on has actually strengthened their 13+ year relationship. Subscribe to our YouTube channel OpenLove101 and visit openlove101.com to sign up for our email list for articles, videos, and events updates! Like, subscribe, and leave a comment below sharing your thoughts on relationship communication! #OpenRelationships #ConsentualNonMonogamy #RelationshipAdvice #SwingLifestyle #CommunicationInRelationships

Being in the lifestyle doesn't mean consent is automatic. In this important video, John and Jackie from OpenLove101.com dive deep into the vital role of consent within the swinging community—especially in environments like swinger clubs and parties. They address common misconceptions, share real experiences, and emphasize that clear communication, mutual respect, and the ability to say "no" at any time are essential. From using safe words to navigating alcohol responsibly, this conversation is a must-watch for anyone seeking to explore ethically and confidently. 🔑 Consent is an ongoing conversation—never a one-time agreement. #OpenLove101 #ConsentMatters #SwingerLifestyle #SexualHealth #NonMonogamy #JohnAndJackie #OpenRelationships

Join hosts John and Jackie Melfi from openlove101.com as they discuss common misconceptions about consensual non-monogamy and the stigmas they face as a swinger couple. In this enlightening conversation, they address the funny and sometimes frustrating questions they receive from "vanilla" friends, from concerns about hitting on partners to fears of association.   The Melfis share their experiences of educating curious strangers, dealing with people who avoid them due to their lifestyle choices, and their mission to demystify consensual non-monogamy. They emphasize that non-monogamous couples are remarkably similar to monogamous ones - they just follow a different relationship model.   TIMESTAMPS:   00:00 - Introduction to Open Love 101 Podcast 00:47 - Common misconceptions from vanilla friends 01:48 - Breaking down stigmas about swinger relationships 03:04 - The reality of consensual non-monogamy vs. stereotypes 05:07 - Educating others about open relationship models 06:31 - Dealing with people who avoid association 07:43 - Understanding societal subgroups and identity 09:06 - Challenges of morality clauses in workplaces 10:25 - Standing up against backlash and judgment   Are you curious about alternative relationship models or looking to better understand the swinger lifestyle? The Melfis offer a judgment-free zone where all questions are welcome.   👍 If you enjoyed this video, please like, subscribe, and share your thoughts in the comments below! Visit openlove101.com for more resources on open relationships, and check out their social media for more content.   #OpenRelationships #ConsensualNonMonogamy #SwingLifestyle #RelationshipAdvice #OpenLove101  

Can emotional connections exist without threatening your primary relationship? In this thought-provoking video, John and Jackie from OpenLove101.com explore the emotional side of swinging—and how trust, communication, and an open mindset can make all the difference. They share personal experiences, debunk common fears, and discuss how societal norms around monogamy shape our views on love, attachment, and fidelity. Whether you swing strictly for fun or are curious about deeper connections, this conversation invites you to rethink what emotional security really means in a non-traditional relationship. 💬 Explore love, trust, and sexuality—on your own terms. #OpenLove101 #SwingingLifestyle #NonMonogamy #EmotionalAttachment #RelationshipTalk #JohnAndJackie #TrustAndCommunication

In this playful and eye-opening episode, John and Jackie dive into the world of fantasy roleplay — a powerful tool for connection, communication, and confidence within relationships. Whether you're new to consensual non-monogamy or simply looking to spice up your intimacy, roleplay offers a safe, creative space to explore fantasies together. From costumes and card games to themed nights at clubs like colette, John and Jackie reveal how fantasy roleplay can break routine, build trust, and help couples express their desires without judgment. They share real-life stories, tips for easing into roleplay, and how to use it as a gentle "test drive" for exploring new boundaries before trying them in real life. With their signature warmth and honesty, they remind listeners that fantasy isn't just about fun — it's about freedom, growth, and shared discovery.      🔑 Key Insights: Fantasy roleplay is a powerful tool for deepening intimacy and exploring desires together.  Adult stores and games make starting roleplay easier and more approachable. Roleplay encourages open communication about fantasies and boundaries. It can serve as a "rehearsal space" before real-life consensual non-monogamous experiences. Emotional safety and mutual consent are essential throughout the process. Shared novelty strengthens emotional bonds and sparks lasting closeness. Themed nights at clubs like colette offer exciting opportunities for roleplay in a supportive environment.    ⏱️ Timestamps: 00:00 – Introduction to fantasy roleplay and its role in relationships  00:37 – Using fantasy roleplay to open communication and explore boundaries 01:35 – Shopping for toys, games, and costumes 03:14 – How a simple card game broke the ice for newcomers 04:04 – Theme nights at clubs as roleplay opportunities 04:33 – Personal roleplay experiences and playful tips 06:10 – Roleplay as a stepping stone to real-life experiences 07:42 – Encouraging community discussion and shared stories 08:07 – Closing thoughts and call to action   Visit openlove101.com to join the email list for updates on upcoming videos, blogs, and travels — plus tips for navigating open relationships with confidence and connection.   Like, subscribe, and share in the comments: What's your favorite fantasy to explore with your partner? How has roleplay helped you open up communication in your relationship? 

Consent isn't one-size-fits-all. In this eye-opening discussion, John and Jackie from OpenLove101.com unpack the many ways couples define and navigate consent—highlighting how mutual respect, trust, and open communication are the keys to maintaining freedom without slipping into control. They share their own experiences, caution against turning consent into restriction, and encourage ongoing conversations to ensure both partners feel safe, heard, and empowered. Whether you're exploring non-monogamy or strengthening your monogamous relationship, this video offers vital insight on building a balanced and trusting connection. 🗣️ Real talk. Honest boundaries. Lasting trust.    #OpenLove101 #ConsentInRelationships #RelationshipTalk #NonMonogamy #TrustAndCommunication #JohnAndJackie   💬 Honest talk. No shame. Real connection.  

In this candid and compassionate episode, hosts John and Jackie explore how couples in consensual non-monogamous relationships can navigate major fights and moments of emotional turbulence. They answer a viewer's heartfelt question about whether a serious fight means the lifestyle "isn't right" for them — and reveal why the opposite is often true.  Drawing from over two decades of experience, John and Jackie explain that conflict is a normal part of any relationship, not just open ones. They share how fear, unfamiliarity, and emotional overwhelm can spark arguments — and how learning to communicate calmly and empathetically can turn those same moments into opportunities for growth and deeper connection. They also discuss how to "baby step" through difficult moments by adjusting boundaries and pacing, creating space for healing and rebuilding trust. This episode reminds viewers that consensual non-monogamy isn't simply about sexual exploration — it's about cultivating safety, self-worth, and authentic partnership through honesty and emotional awareness.    🔑 Key Insights: Fights happen in all relationships — they don't mean you're failing in non-monogamy Fear often underlies conflict; naming it builds empathy Approach fights as a team instead of adversaries  Emotional reactions can differ from intellectual acceptance Baby-stepping through boundaries rebuilds safety and trust Keep discussions focused to prevent escalation Conflict can be a catalyst for growth and deeper intimacy ⏱️ Timestamps: 00:00 – Introduction to Open Love 101 podcast 00:32 – Overcoming fights in consensual non-monogamous relationships 01:36 – Fear as a common root of conflict 03:19 – Approaching disagreements as a team 05:45 – When emotions clash with logic 07:31 – Rebuilding trust with baby steps 08:55 – Keeping conversations concise and constructive 10:36 – Growth and self-esteem through consensual non-monogamy 

How to Create a Great Profile on Adult Social Sites | John & Jackie | OpenLove101 Looking to connect with like-minded people in the open or swinging lifestyle? In this video, John and Jackie from OpenLove101.com share their top tips for creating an honest, attractive, and successful profile on adult social sites like SDC, SLS, and Cassidy. They cover everything from choosing the right photos and being clear about your desires to using validation features for safety and credibility. Whether you're new to the scene or looking to improve your experience, this video helps you present your authentic self—and make meaningful connections both locally and while traveling. 📸 Be real. Be respectful. Have fun. #OpenLove101 #AdultDatingTips #SwingerLifestyle #OnlineDating #ProfileTips #JohnAndJackie #NonMonogamy