The Becoming Podcast | Season 6, Episode 1 | Annie Bray on burnout, caregiving, and finding possibility in impossible times

Hello beautiful ones! I've somehow taken a bit of an unexpected hiatus from the podcast lately, but I'm really, really delighted to share a new episode with you today.  It's a super fun and beautiful conversation between three friends – myself, Mara Glatzel and Becca Piastrelli.  In this episode, we're turning the tables and Mara and Becca are interviewing ME about the launch of my upcoming book, Mothershift:  Reclaiming Motherhood as a Rite of Passage. If you aren't familiar with Mara and Becca, let me tell you a little bit about them first! Mara Glatzel is a coach, podcast host and author of the book Needy:  How to advocate for your needs and claim your sovereignty and Becca Piastrelli is a community gatherer and women's circle facilitator, podcast host and author of the book Root and Ritual:  Timeless ways to connect with land, lineage, community and the self.  These two are friends with each other and they've been my friends for quite a number of years now, and they have been *tireless* champions for Mothershift and my work.  Becca is also an alumni of my MotherSHIFT program.  They both played a key role in my ability to get a book deal for Mothershift, and for that I will be endlessly grateful. In this episode, Mara and Becca and I talk about: > Why I wrote Mothershift and why this book is so important right now.  You'll hear me talk about how I feel like I'm this book's doula, and how easy it's been to share the messages that it holds. > Why "the mothers aren't all right," including my perspective on the US Surgeon General's advisory on the mental health of parents.  We talk about the modern conditions that are particularly challenging for mothers as well as parts of the rite of passage into motherhood that have been difficult – but also filled with potential – since time immemorial. > Our relationship with social media, about how it has become a surrogate for the witnessing we need as we step into motherhood, and whether or not we're actually ever seeing the *real* truth about anyone's experience of mothering. > Is postpartum forever?  We speculate how many years it takes to feel fully embodied in your experience of motherhood. > The role of ritual in supporting and uplifting our matrescence experiences. I do hope you enjoy listening to this episode as much as we loved recording it, and that it gives you a special sneak peek into the writing of Mothershift.  

My friends!  I'm really excited to share this interview with the amazing Asha Frost.  We had such a beautiful conversation, and Asha has so much wisdom to share, and does so eloquently.   Here's some of what Asha and I talk about in this episode: > How Asha's Lupus diagnosis was a threshold moment in her life that made it impossible to keep up with the demands of our modern, capitalist, patriarchal, white supremacist culture – and how she continues to practice slowing down. > The relationship between worthiness and productivity, and the paradox that creativity and "success" often flourish after periods of meaningful rest.  As Asha so beautifully phrases, "miracles are born from rest." > Asha shares some of her experiences of her matrescence – her rite of passage into motherhood. > The potential that transformative times in our lives offer to invite us to divest from and disrupt dominant culture. > Elderhood and the elder medicine that lives in all of us, including our non-human kin.  Asha and I share our love of herons as elders, and gush over the beauty of her new Animal Elder deck. > Cultural appropriation in the rites of passage space – and how, while it's unacceptable, it comes from our collective desire for meaningful ritual and ceremony to mark these transformative times in our lives.

I'm thrilled to bring you this conversation with Sarah Wildeman on the Becoming Podcast this month.  This was such a rich and far-reaching dialogue about all things community-building, which is such an important locus of support – and also struggle – as we traverse times of deep change in our lives. Here's some of what Sarah and I talk about in this episode: > The life-and-death threshold where Sarah learned what it was like to be doing life with people – and where she found the inspiration for a lot of her work now > What it was like living in an intentional community with her family, and how she experienced "the village" firsthand > How "the loss of the village" is not a universal experience, and is actually one that often walks hand-in-hand with the hyper-individualism that comes alongside many cultural privileges > Practical and philosophical wisdom about how to build community, including how asking for help is actually an act of great generosity, how to make your needs known (and identify them in the first place), how to create capacity and room in your life to make community a priority, and how to powerfully invite folks into relationships and gatherings > How hard it is to build community in a season of need in your life > Attachment styles and introversion / extroversion and how they relate to re-villaging > The idea of "tolerating" community and committing to relationship tending even when it's hard, or even when it's not what you'd prefer to be doing I hope you enjoy this interview as much as I did, and that you're able to find some real wisdom and practical support that will help you expand and deepen your community connections.  Enjoy!

Hello, friend!  I'm really excited to share my conversation with Danielle Cohen with you.  If you're a mother, an entrepreneur, a multi-passionate human, or have ever been on either side of a camera, this episode is a must-listen. First, let me tell you a little bit about Danielle. Danielle Cohen is a visibility coach & professional photographer with a unique talent for helping others step into and offer their greatest work. Spanning two decades, her career includes work as a doula, healer, teacher, business consultant, publisher, art director, mentor, and photographer. Known for her keen insights, potent intuition, truth-telling, and her powerful approach to visibility & visuals, Danielle has photographed famous faces and the emerging stars who are forces for good in our world. Her photographs have been featured in magazines, on book covers, as well as on prominent websites, marketing campaigns, and online courses.   Here's some of what Danielle and I talk about in this episode: > Being a multi-passionate human and entrepreneur.  Honestly, if you've got a bio that reads a bit like Danielle's or if you're a coach / doula / author / wilderness quest guide like me, this conversation is going to make you feel so much less alone, and so well-supported. > How photography helped Danielle heal some of the cultural messaging she received as a young mother > How photography can play an important role in a rite of passage, especially because traversing a rite of passage well usually includes being witnessed in the transformation you're navigating. > How to ritualize photo shoots to allow them to offer the fullest visibility medicine they have the potential to offer > Authenticity and performance in the context of photography and being visible – and how they're not necessarily mutually exclusive > The somatics of visibility and what happened to my body in my latest photoshoot > And then, honestly?  Danielle offers an amazing mini-mastermind for any entrepreneur who's visible in the world, especially through photographs.   This is SUCH a rich and wide-ranging conversation:  there literally is something in this episode for everyone.  I hope you enjoy getting to know Danielle and hearing her wisdom as much as I did!

Hello, friend!  I'm delighted to share this month's Becoming Podcast episode with you.  In it, I interview artist and fellow wilderness quester Glenda Goodrich.  Glenda is an artist, art doula, SoulCollage® facilitator, writer, and convener of ceremony.  She brings together earth-based rituals, community gatherings, and creative expression in a search for new ways to show love for the Earth.  Here's some of what Glenda and I talk about in this episode: > How creativity can support us during rites of passage and times of transition in our lives > How Glenda embraced her own creativity in midlife after a powerful wilderness Quest experience, and how stepping into creativity can be a rite of passage unto itself > The call that the midlife transition offers us to live more authentically  > Glenda and I each share some powerful wilderness Quest stories, as well as some of the challenges entangled in embarking on the ritual of Quest > What it is to become your own spiritual authority, and how that can be a journey that is both grief-filled and beautiful  > What it means to create authentic, deeply meaningful ritual 

I'm really excited to share with you my interview with Megan Sheldon.   Megan and I connected through the magic of Instagram a few years ago, and we've recently enjoyed a couple of conversations sharing lots of professional and personal commonalities. Megan holds a tremendous amount of wisdom around grief work, ritual and ceremony, and I'm delighted to have her on the show.     Here's some of what Megan and I talk about in this episode: > How engaging with ritual called Megan early on in her life, as well as the origin story of the Be Ceremonial app. > Ritual and spirituality:  can you have one without the other?   > Many beautiful stories of rituals and ceremonies Megan has facilitated, including funerals, miscarriage and abortion rituals, rituals during illness, and many inspiring and touching others. > The permission we give ourselves – or don't – to grieve and ritualize seemingly invisible moments and turning points in our lives. > Thinking outside the box when it comes to ritual (and breaking a few rules along the way!). > The tender awkwardness of creating ritual for yourself, your family and your community, even when you're new to the practice yourself 

I'm delighted to share with you that The Becoming Podcast is back for its 6th season (wow!) and that I've got a full and rich lineup of guests to share with you this year!   The first is my dear friend Annie Bray. There were a lot of different titles I could have given this podcast and "Deep Conversation Between Two Brilliant Midlife Friends About The Complexity of Life" was right up there.   After we finished this interview, Annie and I chuckled that listening in would be a lot like being welcomed as an eavesdropper in the kind of conversation we might be having anyway, over a cup of tea by a roaring fire, if only we lived in the same city. Our conversation – and our whole friendship – just feels so human.  And so if that sounds like a dose of good medicine for you, I invite you to tune in.   Here's some of what Annie and I talk about in this episode: > The paradox that traversing times of radical transformation in your life is deeply dysregulating, but that  being able to regulate your nervous system is necessary to navigating these times with more ease. > How having a "regulated" nervous system has also been weaponized – particularly against women – and can be conflated with being well behaved or put together. > How our modern perspective of the nervous system is reflective of our culture's individualism, and how we've forgotten the importance of co-regulation with other humans, the more-than-human and the numinous. > How to show up anyway even when you aren't "regulated" or don't have capacity.  Annie and I share a tender moment about how I recently asked for her support, and what it means to hold each other through impossible times that, in the world we're living in, don't look to be getting any easier.

Hello beautiful ones!  I am so excited to share this month's interview with Lucy Jones with you.  I think it might be one of my favourite episodes ever:  our conversation was so rich and so full of the kinds of things I think we *really* need to be talking about when it comes to matrescence and motherhood.   I started following Lucy in the early days of writing her new book, Matrescence: On the Metamorphosis of Pregnancy, Childbirth and Motherhood.  I was totally captivated by the ecological lens she applied to the transition to motherhood.  It was so much like my own perpsective and experience that I felt I'd found a kindred spirit. Lucy's book is one of the first on the experience of matrescence, and it is a raw and riveting account of her own metamorphosis as well as a cultural critique about modern motherhood. As we near the close of registration for the 2023 Season of MotherSHIFT and The Village, I'm delighted to be able to share this conversation with the many of you who are also walking this path of matrescence and matrescence-support.   Here's some of what Lucy and I talk about in this episode: > The rarely spoken-of and yet increasingly common ecological awakening that so many new mothers have – and Lucy's personal experience of leaning into her relationship with the living world as she traversed her own matrescence. > The things no one ever fucking told us about motherhood, including the societal expectations of motherhood versus the realities so many of us face.  We talk about ideologies around birth and mothering and how they deny us the opportunity to feel "normal" in these richly complex and usually paradoxical experiences. > The absence of modern-day rite and ritual to support us through matrescence, and how we must engage in the act of culture creation in order to reclaim these. > How liberal feminism lets mothers down, and how motherhood revolutionizes our relationship with work (and capitalism). > The untapped power of matrescence to radicalize us and poise us to advocate for social change (the biggest FUCK YES of this whole episode!).   I loved this interview so much, and I hope you enjoy tuning in!

Hello beautiful ones!  I am so excited to share this month's interview with Heng Ou and Marisa Belger with you. They are the authors of The First Forty Days:  The Essential Art of Nourishing the New Mother, which was a groundbreaking book for so many new mothers and postpartum professionals.  To say I was delighted to be able to connect with these two amazing women is the understatement of the year!  Especially as we approach the launch of the 2023 Season of MotherSHIFT and The Village, this conversation is so rich and filled with wisdom for mamas and their support people alike.   Here's some of what Heng, Marisa and I talk about in this episode: > What is true now, for both Heng and Marisa, seven years after their bestselling book The First Forty Days was published.  We talk about what has changed and how, in some ways, we're only just beginning. >  What happens when we take the traditions of the first forty days and insert them into a capitalist, patriarchal, white supremacist culture – and how having the "perfect postpartum" is another myth that many mothers can become trapped in. > How we try to tame the wildness and unpredictability of pregnancy, birth and motherhood, and how to sit in the unknowns we face during these times. >  The intuition that new motherhood gives us access to, how "maternal instinct" has been weaponized against mothers, and how listening to your intuition doesn't necessarily mean you'll always get it right. >  What happens to mothers' sense of identity and self-worth when they find themselves dramatically slowing down in the first forty days. > How mothers' relationship with food and their bodies shifts and changes over the course of pregnancy, birth, postpartum and matrescence.   I loved this interview so much, and Heng and Marisa have an incredible wealth of wisdom to share.  I hope you enjoy tuning in!

Hello beautiful ones!  I am so excited to bring you this month's episode of The Becoming Podcast with Mimi Young. Mimi Young is a Taiwanese Canadian animist spirit medium and the founder of Ceremonie, an esoteric brand focused on conversations around greater intuition and creativity, animism, and realigning with our deeper purpose. Mimi works at the intersection of animism and wu shamanism, practical magick, tea kinship, and other Chinese mystic practices to communicate with the Unseen, offering private readings, education and mentorship, and made-to-order skin and aura care. Mimi has held space globally in her Mystery Mentorship program and retreats, as well as collaboratively with brands including Goop, Almost 30, Spirit House Collective, and Tokyo Smoke. She currently holds an online coven space, Homing Coven, open to all who desire to walk closely with the Seen and Unseen.  Here's some of what Mimi and I talk about in this episode: > Failure as a confrontation with death that ultimately makes us more human and divine >  How to suspend your disbelief and follow your intuition in a hyper-rational world >  Animism and working with tea as an ally > How we clutch exogenous sources of intuition like tarot and astrology when we're traversing the unknown, and what to do instead >  How the wisdom of the 5 Chinese Elements can support us to thrive in liminal space >  How motherhood sparked Mimi's intuition – and how this plays out for so many mothers >  The link between creativity and intuition, and the animacy and mystery of Creative Force And so much more.  This was such a rich and wide-reaching conversation, and Mimi is so incredibly well-spoken and wise.  We had fun, too, and laughed a lot!  I hope you enjoy getting to know Mimi as much as I did in this episode.