Best Of: Kink & Casual Sex w/ Justin Lehmiller

On today’s show, I answer your sex and relationship questions. I cover what to do if you’re questioning your sexuality while married with kids, how to initiate your first threesome, when (if ever) you should tell your partner how many people you’ve slept with, and ways to get more comfortable while giving oral sex. I also talk about what to do if the porn you watch makes you feel guilty, how to approach exploring a fetish without shame, what to do if you disagree with your partner about having another child and what it means when you cry after sex. In this episode, you’ll learn: How honest, heartfelt conversations about intimacy can reignite connection and strengthen emotional bonds with your partner. Techniques to overcome sexual conditioning and experience pleasure in new ways through mindfulness and open communication. The importance of exploring sexual fantasies with clear boundaries and how they can evolve as part of a healthy sexual journey. Show Notes: Join the SmartSX Membership: Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, community building, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse. Yes! No! Maybe? List & Other Sex With Emily Guides: Explore pleasure, deepen connections, and enhance intimacy using these Sex With Emily downloadable guides.  SHOP WITH EMILY! (free shipping on orders over $99) The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure This episode is brought to you by: LELO (Use code “SEXWITHEMILY” for 25% off your order, exclusions may apply.) Want more? Visit the Sex With Emily Website  Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok | Threads | YouTube Let’s text: Sign up here Want me to slide into your email inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular. See the full show notes at sexwithemily.com

In today’s episode, I’ve brought my Mom back on the show to dive into a range of topics from the hilarious to the profound. We reminisced about growing up as women in an ever-changing world, trying to date and have sex! Our conversation covered the early passionate days of relationships to the mundane, finding time for sex and reviving your libido. I also had some fun quizzing my mom on modern dating slang. Her take on each word made me laugh. I think you’ll love hearing about the many stages of sex from my mom's seasoned perspective. Exploring dating terms with my mom was a fantastic way to demystify modern relationships! I asked her about breadcrumbing, DTR, red flags, situationships, ghosting, pegging, and rizz, aka…charisma.   Learning points from the episode: The evolution of relationships from passion to domesticity. The impact of menopause on intimacy. The many layers of modern dating terms. Insights into maintaining a long-term relationship.   Tune into these articles:  I Asked My Mom 5 Things About Sex, Sexuality and Aging: Here’s What She Said 8 Most Common Sexual Struggles for Couples (& How to Solve Them)   This episode is brought to you by Solaray. If you're seeking a healthier cycle or mood support, you have to check out these products. For 15% off your entire order, go to: www.solaray.com/sexwithemily  Solaray Disclaimer: The FDA has not evaluated any of these statements, and these products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Additionally, I've personally had a great experience with Solaray, but each woman’s experience is unique. The Solaray "HER LIFE STAGES" formulas shared in this episode are not intended to address every symptom or concern mentioned, but they are designed to provide powerful life-stage support.    SMARTSX: I'm thrilled to announce SmartSX, an exclusive membership that's revolutionizing the way you will approach sexual wellness. Last week, I kicked off this exciting journey, inviting you to join a community that's all about transforming your sex life. Whether you're looking to deepen connections or explore new kinks, SmartSX is your gateway to all things sexy and insightful. Embrace your pleasure potential with an open heart and mind. As a member, you'll embark on a journey to discover your unique desire style and boost your Sex IQ. You’ll gain invaluable tools for a healthier sex life through engaging discussions, expert guests, and direct interactions with me. Each month, we'll dive into themes based on my 12 Universal Truths About Sex and Pleasure, starting with 'Sexual Connection is a Skill Set.' CLICK HERE TO JOIN

So your partner is great… but you want them to bring the heat, and don’t know how to ask for it. Now what? On today’s episode, I answer calls about how to ask for exactly what you want, or conversely, don’t want. I also give advice about how to achieve orgasm without relying too heavily on porn or toys, what to do if your partner’s penis is too big for anal, what to do if YOU like giving oral but your partner isn’t as down to receive, and how to enjoy casual dating. In this episode you’ll learn: How past negative experiences can impact your current reactions to physical affection, and discover strategies to rebuild a positive relationship with touch. Understand the importance of transparent dialogue with your partner about your needs and boundaries, and how to approach these conversations constructively. Explore the challenges of casual dating and the significance of self-awareness in identifying what type of relationship dynamic suits you best. Show Notes: Join the SmartSX Membership: Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, community building, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse. Yes! No! Maybe? List & Other Sex With Emily Guides: Explore pleasure, deepen connections, and enhance intimacy using these Sex With Emily downloadable guides.  SHOP WITH EMILY! (free shipping on orders over $99) The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure Want more? Visit the Sex With Emily Website  Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok | Threads | YouTube Let’s text: Sign up here Want me to slide into your email inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular. See the full show notes at sexwithemily.com

Hey, pleasure seekers! I'm super excited about today's episode. I always encourage you to discuss sex with your friends, so I've invited Amy Friedlander, my CEO and brilliant friend, to join this conversation. We're both fed up with the pleasure gap, a topic The New York Times highlighted in a recent article, "The Orgasm Gap Isn’t Going Away for Straight Women." Today, Amy and I are actively seeking ways to bridge this gap. We're sharing our sexual histories, addressing the pitfalls of faking orgasms, and talking about negative sex-pectations set by porn and extreme media portrayals. We're talking about methods to prioritize pleasure and close the orgasm gap. Tune in to be part of this change and close the gap with us! You deserve a richer, more fulfilling sex life. We're sharing our sexual histories, addressing the pitfalls of faking orgasms, and talking about negative sex-pectations set by porn and extreme media portrayals. Together, we're talking about methods to prioritize pleasure and close the orgasm gap. Tune in to be part of this change and close the gap with us! You deserve a richer, more fulfilling sex life. In this episode, you'll learn: Why the Orgasm Gap Persists: We'll unpack how inadequate sex education continues to widen this divide. The Dangers of Faking It: Discover why being authentic in expressing your sexual needs is essential for true pleasure. The Role of Media: We'll debunk harmful myths and foster a healthier dialogue around sex. Also, don't miss our discussions on whether sleeping apart can enhance your sex life and how Kegel trainers can lead to more intense orgasms. Tune into these articles: Does Sleeping Apart Help Your Sex Life? Kegel Trainers for Bigger, Badder Orgasms More: Try the LELO SILA CRUISE Today. Link here! Practice love every day with Paired, the #1 app for couples. Download the app at https://www.paired.com/SWE 💖 SMARTSX ANNOUNCEMENT 💖 Today, September 10th, 2024, we're thrilled to launch SmartSx, our membership platform where pleasure meets education. Join our community to transform your intimate life, whether you're deepening connections or exploring new kinks. SmartSx is your gateway to all things sexy and insightful. Embrace your pleasure potential with an open heart and mind. As a member, you'll embark on a journey to discover your unique desire style and boost your Sex IQ. You’ll also gain tools for a healthier sex life through engaging discussions, expert guests, and direct interactions with me. Each month will feature themes based on my 12 Universal Truths About Sex and Pleasure, starting with 'Sexual Connection is a Skill Set.' CLICK HERE TO JOIN

In this episode, Dr. Emily welcomes her friend and fellow Michigan native, Ophira from The AstroTwins, to discuss their new book, The Astrology Advantage, and their revolutionary I*AM system. This unique system or framework blends astrology with the Enneagram and Meyers Briggs to unlock insights into your personality-- your buttons, skills, passions, and life path. As a bonus, Ophi reads Emily's chart, revealing how the I*AM system shapes her career, sex, desire, and goals. They explore the Authority, Innovator, and Maven archetypes, offering a fresh perspective on understanding yourself through astrology. Tune in to learn how astrology influences desire and sexuality and how to align with your authentic sexual self. Get your copy of The Astrology Advantage to dig deeper into your I*AM archetype! Ophi describes the I*AM System as “an astrological personality test” and “Atomic Habits meets The Wisdom of The Enneagram.” You need this book! I could not put it down. Purchase: The Astrology Advantage More about The AstroTwins What You'll Learn: The I*AM System Explained: Discover how the Authority, Innovator, and Maven archetypes correlate with the 13 planets in astrology and your chart. Astrology Meets Enneagram: Learn how each IAM archetype connects with the 12 zodiac signs, offering a new lens to understand your personality, desires, and behavior. Sex, Shame, and Kink: Understand how your I*AM archetype influences your sexual expression and how to overcome shame or embrace kink through astrological insights. Body Confidence and Sexual Fulfillment: Explore how aligning with your archetype helps you feel more comfortable in your body as you pursue pleasure and intimacy. Sexual Authenticity: Learn how your sexual style—whether you're an Innovator, Authority, or Maven—affects how you engage with partners and express desire authentically. Also, SmartSx, my new membership, launches on September 10th. Please join me and this incredible community of open-minded pleasure-seekers! Here's a sneak peak of what you'll experience when you sign up: SmartSX is a community and app for individuals prioritizing pleasure and sexual well-being, helping members explore desires and create a fulfilling sex life. Great lovers are made, not born: Anyone can learn how to have the best sexual experiences of their lives. SmartSX members can directly interact with her and ask questions in the community. Inclusive membership: SmartSX caters to everyone—whether you're a beginner or experienced, single or partnered—focusing on understanding, giving, and receiving pleasure. Members will uncover their unique desire style, increase their Sex IQ, enhance sexual communication, and gain essential tools for a healthy sex life through discussions, special guests, and experts. Each month features a theme based on Dr. Emily's 12 Universal Truths About Sex and Pleasure, starting with Sexual Connection is a Skill Set. GET ON THE WAITLIST: CLICK HERE

Do you always have sex on the the first date? Do you always swipe right on people who aren’t good for you? What are your bad dating habits – and how can you break them? I asked you to tell me what negative dating patterns you’re trying to change, and you all delivered! On today’s show, I’m addressing your top dating problems so we can solve them together. Having sex too soon, trying to “fix” less-than-ideal partners, fear of asserting yourself, having misaligned expectations, the tendency to audition people for the role of life partner – we’re covering it all, so you can feel empowered with new partners and have an amazing time with existing partners. In this episode you’ll learn: How to Identify and Break Negative Dating Patterns The Importance of Assertiveness in Dating Strategies for Building Self-Confidence in Dating Show Notes: Join the Waitlist for my SmartSX Membership Community: Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse. Yes! No! Maybe? Guide SHOP WITH EMILY! (free shipping on orders over $99) Shopify.com/swe The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure Want more? Sex With Emily: Home Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok  Let’s text: Sign Up Here Want me to slide into your inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular. See the full show notes at sexwithemily.com/live.

Let's explore the world of sex parties! Are you curious if this scene is for you? This episode is your go-to guide for everything about sex parties. We'll cover the various types available, from kink-centric gatherings to more relaxed swinging events. I'll guide you through finding these parties, understanding the etiquette, and what to expect when you arrive. We'll discuss how to mingle effectively and, importantly, what to wear to blend in or stand out. So join me at this podcast, Sex Party!  Don't forget to join the waitlist for SmartSX, which launches on September 10th, 2024. This incredible membership will offer you access to exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse. Smart SX: join our waitlist!  FetLife Feeld #Open Kinky Rabbit Club Just Thrive (code BOGOSWE) Shop With Emily! (free shipping on orders over $99) The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure Want more? Sex With Emily: Home Read this week's Articles: How to Have Vigorous Sex | How to *Actually* Dirty Talk Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok  Let’s text: Sign Up Here Want me to slide into your inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular.

In today's episode, we’re diving into the questions you've been too shy to ask out loud—yes, those. Remember, shame has no place here, especially when it comes to your sexual curiosities and concerns. We’re all in this together, exploring the complex yet exhilarating world of sex, so let’s break down those barriers and talk openly. In this episode you’ll learn:  How do I handle rejections for sex from my partner when they masturbate daily? If their “porn” type looks different than my body type, does that mean they may not be attracted to me? Is it normal to think about someone else during sex? How do I get my partner to understand I’m not a porn star…Yes, I’ll try things, but…I’m not that kinky. I’ve never squirted. Is that normal? How can I get myself to squirt? Can too much use of a vibrator desensitize or burn my clitoris?  How can I get a clitoris orgasm by mouth without it taking hours? I don’t like to masturbate in front of my partner because it's hard for me to focus. Is something wrong with me? Show Notes: Join the Waitlist for my SmartSX Membership Community: Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse. Yes! No! Maybe? Guide SHOP WITH EMILY! (free shipping on orders over $99) Shop VIIA Today and use code "EMILY" at checkout for 15% off your order The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure Want more? Sex With Emily: Home Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok  Let’s text: Sign Up Here Want me to slide into your inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular. See the full show notes at sexwithemily.com/live.

Let’s be honest: there are certain myths about sex that are SO common, they seem like truth. Things like: what it means to be wet, what it means to be hard, and what it means if you use a vibrator a lot. But guess what? A ton of the things you and I have both heard about sex aren’t based on science - they’ve just been repeated a lot. So on today’s show, I’m debunking the top sex myths I see and hear, and giving you the actual facts.  What does it mean about your sexual ability if you’ve had a lot of partners - or conversely, hardly any? We talk about it. How about if you’re not getting wet during sex. Does that mean you’re not turned on? We discuss! Let’s say you use a vibrator a lot - can you get addicted to it? Or my favorite: does having an orgasm mean the sex was good? I tackle both of these. And finally, we face the truth about anal sex, because spoiler alert...it’s not just for gay men. In this episode you’ll learn:  About the wide range of orgasms people can experience and why each is unique. Why libido levels vary between individuals and how this impacts sexual relationships. How pornography can shape unrealistic expectations and affect real-life sexual experiences. Show Notes: Join the Waitlist for my SmartSX Membership Community: Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse. Yes! No! Maybe? Guide SHOP WITH EMILY! (free shipping on orders over $99) The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure Want to try Promescent's Delay Spray or Arousal Gel? Visit Promescent.com/emily for 15% off your order! Practice love every day with Paired, the #1 app for couples. Download the app at https://www.paired.com/SWE  Want more? Sex With Emily: Home Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok  Let’s text: Sign Up Here Want me to slide into your inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular. See the full show notes at sexwithemily.com/live.

Are you suddenly feeling a little...kinkier? According to my guest, social psychologist, and Kinsey Institute researcher Justin Lehmiller, a lot of us are ready to sex-periment right now. Justin shares fascinating sex research from the COVID era, the sex communication practices heterosexual individuals can learn from the LGBTQ+ community, and how to make casual sex better for women. (Spoiler alert: emphasize her pleasure.) We also unpack the Kinsey Scale and why sexuality is so freaking fluid, why threesomes are such a popular fantasy, and what our porn preferences reveal (and don’t reveal) about us. Finally, we talk about sex education as it’s practiced in The Netherlands, and give you some incredibly useful tools for talking to your kids about sex (because it’s really important!). In this episode, you’ll learn: How to Improve casual sex Insights from the LGBTQ+ Community Tools for talking to your kids about sex Show Notes: More Justin Lehmiller : Website | Instagram | X | Podcast | Book Join the Waitlist for my SmartSX Membership Community: Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse. Yes! No! Maybe? Guide Try the ENIGMA™ Cruise Today! (Use code "SEXWITHEMILY" for 25% off your order, exclusions may apply.) SHOP WITH EMILY! (free shipping on orders over $99) The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure Want more? Sex With Emily: Home Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok  Let’s text: Sign Up Here Want me to slide into your inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular. See the full show notes at sexwithemily.com.