124. From Totaling My Car to Total Gratitude

I was born a sugar addict, sneaking food as a child and using it to cope with my feelings. Moving constantly – twelve cities in eight years – made food my only reliable companion. In college, far from home, I'd cycle through dieting and binging, filled with shame but unable to stop.  After many years of failed attempts at recovery, the binges escalated. They grew bigger, lasted longer, and became more dangerous. One night, I totaled my car while rummaging through a snack bag and rear-ended the car in front of me. As I waited for the police to arrive, all I could think about was my shrinking window of time to secretly binge before my husband came home. Sixteen years ago, I joined Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA); twelve years ago, I finally surrendered. With a strong sponsor who told me the truth with love, I followed direction for the first time. That decision changed everything. Today, the mind that was once noisy and negative is quiet and grateful. I go through each day without food cravings, I've stopped nitpicking, and my marriage has improved dramatically. My greatest gift is waking up each morning with the promise of another day of recovery.

At 65 years old and 210 pounds, I saw a photo on social media and didn’t recognize myself. That moment of disbelief led me to Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), where I discovered I wasn’t just overweight – I was a food addict. As an African American woman, I grew up hearing that I’d have to work twice as hard to succeed, and the pressure turned into perfectionism. For years, I ate to cope, buying sweets late at night and eating in the car so no one would see. I knew every bakery on my route to work, each pink box “for everyone else.” After a stressful day, I’d close the curtains, turn on the TV, and eat. When I read the AA Big Book and swapped the word alcohol for food, I finally saw the truth. I’d heard about FA more than ten years earlier, but only when I was ready did I find what I needed: a sponsor, a scale, and a way to live without food running my life. I'm learning to live with grace, even through the biggest challenges. When my husband faced his fourth cancer diagnosis, I wanted to eat -- but instead, I dropped to my knees and asked for help. My fellows and my family brought meals, comfort, and strength when I needed it most. Today, at 76 – one day at a time – I am free from the addiction that once ruled my life. #africanamerican #foodaddiction #fromperfectionismtopeace #iamafoodaddict

I grew up surrounded by addiction, though my parents had found recovery early in my life. I was a relatively skinny child. Diagnosed with ADHD at five years old, I was on medication that suppressed my appetite. In 5th grade, my parents and teachers decided to try taking me off meds for a year, and I went from a size 8 slim to a 16 husky, gaining 60 pounds. When I went back on the medication to improve my ability to focus, it never again suppressed my appetite. By 19, I weighed 240 pounds. I was lonely, broke, and down to one pair of pants with the thighs rubbed out. It was less embarrassing to ask my mom to take me to a meeting than to buy me the next size up. At my first Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) meeting, I got a sponsor and began working the program. I’d had such a small view of what my future could be, but FA unleashed my ability to dream wildly and achieve those dreams. In the sixteen years since, my life has been transformed beyond what I could have imagined. I'm married, raising two kids, and living with peace and freedom instead of obsession and compulsion. FA saved my life.  #FoodAddictionRecovery #FAStories #RecoveryJourney #LifeBeyondFood #FoodAddictsInRecoveryAnonymous #BreakingFreeFromFood #RecoveryWins #OneDayAtATime #HealingWithFA #FromStruggleToStrength #FARecovery #SelfLoveThroughRecovery

When I found Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), my weight wasn’t my real problem – it was the complete madness I experienced around food. Food had controlled my life since childhood. I grew up in my great-grandmother’s house, and the kitchen was my sanctuary. I was a fearful child; the sound of the doorbell sent me running to hide under her skirt, but food meant love and safety. I started using food to make myself feel better in high school when I was being bullied. Even after things got better, the feelings of insecurity didn’t. Food became my way to cope, and college only made it worse. I would seek refuge in a damp basement study space where I could eat alone. When my sister passed away at too young an age, weight began to show up on my body. Work in Washington, D.C. was challenging too; eating huge portions, hiding to eat, lying to cover it up – it was exhausting. I always made excuses to leave social events early. When someone at church asked what I put before God, I immediately knew my answer: food. At my lowest point, after consuming a bucket-sized family meal, I passed out in my car at a toll booth and was taken by ambulance to the hospital. Through multiple sponsors and countless relapses, I eventually found true recovery. Today, FA serves as my guardrail, preventing me from driving off the cliff of food addiction. My relationships have improved, and I’m no longer hiding. I have so much gratitude for this program. It is my blueprint for living.

From vodka at 13 to nightly binges of flour and sugar in adulthood, my life was ruled by addiction. At 23, weighed down by blame, insecurity, and shame about being gay, I attempted to take my own life. At 24 years old, I found sobriety in A.A. After decades of struggling with food, weighing over 240 pounds, I discovered Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA). In FA, I began a journey of abstinence that transformed my life – body, mind, and spirit. In FA, I stopped blaming others and learned how to be honest with myself. I reconnected with a higher power and returned to a healthy weight. I even went back to school at 48, earned a degree, and experienced a rewarding final chapter in my career before I retired. I have also endured profound loss. I lost both of my parents within six weeks of each other, and not long after, my brother and sister. I was able to walk through grief abstinently, supported by the tools in FA and with a higher power guiding me. At 64, I live one day at a time, forever grateful for the Twelve Steps and the many, many gifts of recovery.   #lgbtq #grief #spiritualcondition #sober #abstinent #workingthetools

The oldest of six children with parents who were overwhelmed, but tried hard, she found comfort in food from an early age. Despite being an average student at a healthy weight, she struggled with self-doubt and a fear of failure. After leaving home, food became her go-to coping mechanism for fear, doubt, and insecurity. Throughout her recovery, she faced many health challenges — including multiple sclerosis, tuberculosis, and numerous surgeries. When she found Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), she thought she could manage on her own. However, true change only came when she followed suggestions, got a sponsor, and used the tools of the program. She now has deep and meaningful relationships, and she finds joy in the simple things. Her story is an example of the advice to “stay until the miracle happens.

My earliest recollection is from the age of four – being shy and awkward, always afraid to join other kids at play. I was a picky eater and would take a long time to get through what was on my plate. Still, I began to put on the pounds, and I got it in my head that losing weight would change everything. I’d be confident, outgoing, and finally feel like I fit in. So, I went on a diet. Then, I binged. At first, it was just Friday nights, like a little “date” with food. Then it was the whole weekend. Before I knew it, I was binging every night. By 19, I was deep in bulimia – hiding food, purging, taking laxatives, anything to keep my weight down. I kept looking for a “magic fix,” but nothing worked. One doctor told me to eat in moderation, and another told me to go to a 12-step program. I went, but I didn’t think I was that bad – until I was. Years went by. I lost jobs. I even ate out of garbage bins. I joined another program, but I manipulated it to eat what I wanted. I worked the steps, but not really. And my life? It didn’t change. In 2009, I found Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA). I was skeptical, but something clicked. I got a sponsor, and I’ve been abstinent ever since. At first, I complained about the structure – the weighing, the meetings, all of it. Eventually, I stopped fighting it, and when I did, everything changed. Today, I’m fully engaged in life – not just in a smaller body, but with a healthier mind and spirit. I show up for my family, connect with people, and have real friendships – real confidence. Food no longer controls me, and I finally feel free. #bulimia #bulimic #bingeeater #bingepurge

From a young age, she learned that food could quiet her inner storms. As a teenager, desperate to control her weight, she experimented with appetite suppressants—only to find that quick fixes led to deeper pain. She cycled through restricting, bulimia, and over-exercising, each attempt a futile escape from an overwhelming addiction that robbed her of being the mother and wife she longed to be. She lived a double life of promiscuity, drugs, and smoking. When life felt unbearable, food was her refuge. In recovery, however, her story took a dramatic turn. Today, she not only enjoys a healthy body but also thrives in deeply loving relationships with her husband, children, and extended family. With the unwavering support of her Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) community lighting the way, she has broken the cycle of addiction that has plagued her family, embarking on a powerful journey of self-love and discovery.

From a young age, her life was doom and gloom. Food was her reprieve, protecting her from uncomfortable emotions. She endured sexual trauma as a young child, a difficult family, and mental illness. In elementary school, she began dieting and eventually tried restricting food. It was unsustainable over the long-term. At the age of 21, she found Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA). There, she saw people change their relationship with food. Coming in at 325 lbs, she lost 175 lbs in just over a year. In FA, she has walked through the highs and lows of life. She stayed until the miracle happened and lives in freedom today.

At 78, he’s lived through war, marriage, career highs—and a 30-year secret battle with bulimia. Although he was raised in a middle-class family with healthy eating habits, he internalized early messages that “thin is good” and “fat is bad.” He grew up with food scarcity, body shame, and pressure to be thin, which led to a decades-long cycle of bingeing and purging, hidden even from his closest loved ones. For years, he felt alone, believing bulimia was a “women’s issue.” He hit rock bottom when he lost his business and marriage due to bulimia. He then received an unexpected call from a member of Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), who encouraged him to attend a meeting, which changed everything. There he found the community, tools, and sponsorship that broke the cycle for good. Today, with over 20 years of abstinence, he shares how recovery restored his health, his relationships, and his peace of mind.