Why Do I Feel Invisible As A Spouse?- E51

Why does it always seem so hard to take time away from the kids in this life? If it's not your feelings of guilt, or the schedule, it's childcare challenges. In this episode Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) discuss the recent ways they have been able to navigate taking time away from the kids and the challenges that have come up. 

It's in the daily ins and outs that we notice the little ways the career impacts our lives, good and bad. The way our kids play, the conversations we have at home, and the way we schedule our lives. Here's a couple of stories from Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) on how the career has had impacts on their lives recently and reflections on how first responders can support their families in their adjustment. 

Having kids you always hear from others, "Enjoy it! It goes by so fast!" and "You'r so lucky to get so much time home with your kids!"  So why does it feel so hard to enjoy on some days? And why do the days feel so long!?  In this episode Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) talk about personal experiences with their own kids and some of the most challenging parts of their days. 

As a first Responder spouse we have to manage a lot from the schedule conflicts, sacrificed time together, unpredictable events and emotions, and so much more. Why is it that it often feels as though our challenging role is not seen? Do you ever feel like your sacrifice is invisible at times? In this episode, Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) discuss the chaos of home life and reflect on that invisibility spouses often feel. 

In the first responder family life, scheduling can be such a challenge. It's hard to find time to do every day things not to mention time away together for your marriage. In this episode, Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) discuss how they find the time with their spouse and challenges that always seem to get in the way. 

It's never out of sight out of mind over here in first responder marriages. Even when they are gone the plans we make with family, friends, and even the meals we prepare, seem to all have to take their schedule into consideration. We keep them at the front of our minds. This is sweet! Until t turns into feelings of rejection, or hurt, or resentment. Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) discuss the simple things spouses do in their everyday lives that can have big impacts on their feelings and relationships. 

Too many spouses are feeling the extra weight of the first responder profession right now and feeling alone with it. If you're feeling exhausted by the constant mandatory overtimes and new demands of the department... you're not alone. Listen in as Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) discuss all that's gong on for so many first responder families right now and know that you're not alone. First responders are getting hit hard and that means we as a family FEEL it. 

As a First Responder spouse we often go in and out of survival mode depending on whether we are single parenting or co-parenting.  This may cause us to actually adopt two different parenting styles or ways to run the household. It can often feel like our life pauses a moment and then they return and we're back. The transition in and out of this is a challenge for the whole family. In this episode, Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) do some deep reflecting on all the challenges this may pose for first responder families and how it plays out in their own. 

As a first responder spouse you may or may not feel pressure to be "one of the good ones." What does that actually mean? Or what should it mean? Have you ever felt the need to hold in your own emotions about how things are going simply because you know how emotionally taxing their career is? In this episode, Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) discuss the potential experiences spouses may have around these topics and what that might look like in a marriage. Added bonus, Dr. Rachelle discusses her "marriage contact." 

When you are the spouse of a first responder you take on a lot of additional responsibilities at home. It can be hard to accept this reality since it wasn't your career choice. However, it can be very helpful to mentally commit to your own "shift" in order to survive. In this episode, Dr. Rachelle (Fire Wife) and Dr. Alma (Police Wife) discuss committing to the "shift," why it is not helpful to compare who's "shift" is more challenging between you and your first responder, and why this topic may come up in the first place.