People Pleasing and Sales

Welcome to the show! https://www.captivatetheroom.com   General Overview Conversation Summary: The host, Tracy Goodwin, delivered a solo podcast episode about the negative impact of the "mask of people pleasing" on sales and communication. She defined this "voice mask" as a set of protective vocal habits that cause a speaker to neutralize their personality, block genuine connection, and sound tentative. Goodwin argued that in a sales context, this focus on being liked rather than serving the client led to a loss of authority and business, as the speaker was often perceived as indifferent or lacking confidence. She supported her points with anecdotes from her coaching practice, explained that these masks stemmed from deeper issues like imposter syndrome, and proposed that the solution was to release the need for approval and focus on creating an authentic "voice experience" for the listener. Key Points The "mask of people pleasing" was identified as the most common and destructive vocal pattern in sales, causing individuals to neutralize their personality and block connection. People pleasers in sales mistakenly believed they must be liked to make a sale, which led them to hide their passion and expertise, resulting in a flat delivery that was perceived as indifference. The vocal habits associated with this mask, such as sounding tentative or ending statements with a rising intonation (lilt), undermined the speaker's authority and subconsciously asked for permission. These vocal masks were described as habits built on deeper insecurities, imposter syndrome, and a lack of self-worth, which surfaced in high-stakes situations like selling or job interviews. The recommended solution was to stop focusing on the outcome of being liked and instead concentrate on serving the client and revealing one's authentic self through their voice.

Welcome to the show! https://www.captivatetheroom.com   General Overview Interview Summary In an interview on the "Captivate the Room" podcast, Professor Okhee Lee discussed her personal and professional journey, from growing up in a remote South Korean village to becoming a leading academic in STEM education at New York University. She detailed her work focused on multilingual learners, advocating for an asset-based approach that recognizes their inherent capabilities. A significant portion of the conversation centered on her transformative experience with voice coaching, which she began at age 60. Lee explained how this training helped her overcome layers of self-imposed silence rooted in her cultural background, gender, and profession. She articulated a profound connection between finding her physical voice and claiming her identity, which empowered her to advocate for herself, win numerous awards, and become a more impactful public intellectual. Interviewee Background Okhee Lee was a professor in the Steinhardt School of Culture, Education, and Human Development at New York University. Her expertise was in STEM (science, technology, engineering, and mathematics) education, with a specific focus on promoting equity, justice, and language learning for all students, particularly multilingual learners. Her work involved integrating science, language, and computational thinking to address major societal challenges. She was the recipient of many honors and awards for her contributions to the field. Key Points Okhee Lee's work shifted the educational paradigm from viewing multilingual learners through a deficit lens (e.g., "limited English proficient") to an asset-based perspective that values their diverse knowledge and languages. She advocated for making complex STEM concepts tangible and accessible by grounding them in real-world phenomena, such as studying garbage to understand decomposition and the conservation of matter. Her personal journey was one of determination, where she had to "beat the system" by earning high test scores to convince her family to let her study in the U.S. instead of getting married. At age 60, she undertook voice coaching which she described as a profound, identity-shifting experience. It helped her unpack and overcome layers of self-silencing stemming from being an Asian American woman in a male-dominated academic field. She argued that speaking and listening are fundamental skills that are critically undervalued in society and academia, unlike reading and writing, which often serves to silence certain groups. Finding her voice physically allowed her to find her voice academically and personally, leading her to assert her right to be recognized for her work and to actively mentor others.

Welcome to the show and to the series that I'm ending 2025 with.  I'm rolling out my top 5 episodes of 2025. This was one of my personal favorites.  Everyone has a wounded voice and they don't realize it.  If we just heal the wound, the don't actually fix the voice, the voice has to be dealt with as well. I hope you enjoy this series and best wishes for a very happy holidays.   Have you taken my voice mask quiz? https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/621a5513edca630018200027   Are you ready to rewrite your voice wounds and finally find your real voice? Here are two options to work with me.   The Voice Code https://www.captivatetheroom.com/voicecode   Voice Mastery https://www.captivatetheroom.com/voicemastery    

Interview Summary: In this interview, host Tracy Goodwin spoke with leadership coach Maree Burgess. Maree discussed her career transition from nursing to banking and finally to leadership consultancy. The conversation centered on the qualities of effective versus ineffective leaders, with Maree identifying the fear of asking for help and imposter syndrome as key deficits in struggling leaders, often leading to micromanagement. They explored major challenges for leaders, including time management, the culture of "busyness," and the prevalence of unnecessary meetings. Maree introduced a pyramid model for team performance (Minutia, Task, Outcome, Impact) and shared anecdotes from her coaching practice, including her work with senior medical professionals. The interview concluded with a discussion on the importance of authenticity and how voice coaching helped Mari remove her own professional "masks."   Maree Burgess is the leadership coach, trainer, facilitator, speaker, and author dedicated to turning managers into exceptional leaders. Her career began as a nurse in a major trauma hospital, where she developed the calm presence she’s known for today. A move into banking revealed the critical role of strong leadership and engaged teams, sparking an obsession for good leadership that led her to launch her consultancy over 20 years ago. Maree now works with leaders and teams to level up through her proven Nine Accelerators for Success framework. Her blend of practical expertise, strategic insight, and genuine care empowers clients to operate with clarity, confidence, and impact, unlocking their potential and creating teams people love to be part of. LINKS W: www.mareeburgess.com   LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mareeburgess/   Instagram: maree_burgess YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@mareeburgess    Key Points Ineffective leaders often failed because they either did not recognize they needed help or were too afraid to ask for it. Imposter syndrome was a significant issue, even for highly credentialed individuals, and it often led to a need for control and micromanagement. Great leaders focused on empowering their team members, understanding their capabilities, and providing the necessary support to "lift them up." The biggest challenge for leaders in 2025 was not a lack of time, but how they used their time. Maree emphasized delegation and eliminating non-essential tasks and meetings as critical skills. The tendency to be "busy" was often used as a "badge of honor" but also served as a protection mechanism to avoid more difficult, strategic work where one might fail. Meeting culture in many organizations was habitual and inefficient; leaders needed to challenge the necessity and duration of meetings to improve productivity. She presented a four-level pyramid model of team performance: Minutia (drowning in busyness), Task (working in silos), Outcome (aligned and effective), and Impact (achieving the unachievable). To maintain focus on important work, she shared the mantra of an Australian Olympic rowing crew: "Will this make our boat go faster?" Notable Quotes "The ones that fail are often the ones that either don't recognize or are afraid to ask for help." (20:00) - Stated when explaining the primary deficit of leaders who struggle. "So when people feel like an imposter, they've got to be across everything. Once they're across everything, they're micromanaging." (0:26) - Said while linking the feeling of being an imposter directly to the negative leadership behavior of micromanagement. "I obsess about delegation, the untapped leadership skill that no one really gets. Right?" (24:43) - Mentioned in the context of time management and how leaders can free themselves up for more impactful work. "Meetings make people lazy. You can rock up to a meeting and not participate." (30:27) - Part of her critique of inefficient and habitual "meeting cultures" within organizations. "I've always had the belief that my voice is really important And how I use my voice really helps with what I do." (50:09) - Explained as her motivation for seeking out voice coaching to become more authentic and effective. Kicker Quotes "No one comes to work, I believe no one comes to work to do a bad job, but that's how it's perceived for whatever reason." "The great leaders understand how to elegantly move people on quickly in ways that even the person being moved on, thanks or at least helps them lift up." "Meetings really annoy me. And also meetings fill time. So even though people complain about it, everyone is... using busyness as a badge of honor."  

Welcome to the show! I've got a little bit of a recap for you on some of the shows I've done lately with more detail about how the voice plays a role in getting what you want, specifically in sales.   Key Message Your subconscious voice patterns and "masks" are costing you money and preventing authentic connection, even when you think you're being genuine. Main Points The Hidden Cost of Voice Masks Even successful people leave 30% of potential buyers behind due to subtle voice issues One small voice adjustment can dramatically impact results: Jade's story: Conversion rate jumped from 40% to 80% after removing one protective sound Another client: Achieved 78% conversion rate at live events after fixing minimizing patterns Common Voice Masks That Kill Sales 1. "I don't want to sound salesy" Results in minimizing and flattening offers Makes you sound unconfident about your own programs Buyers lose inspiration and curiosity 2. "I don't want to bother people" Creates rushed, indifferent delivery Sounds like you're hurrying to get through interactions Makes listeners feel unwelcome 3. Outcome-driven/problem-solver patterns Being "vocally somewhere else" while speaking Creates disconnect between words and presence The Subconscious Protection System Your nervous system tries to keep you "safe" by avoiding judgment, rejection, or abandonment These protective patterns show up as voice masks that repel listeners You can't hear these patterns yourself because your subconscious doesn't want you to Why This Matters More Than Ever In an AI world, authentic human frequency is crucial Many people have "buried" their natural feeling sounds Without authentic vocal connection, you sound flat and AI-like Bottom Line The gap between thinking you're being authentic and actually connecting authentically through your voice is costing you sales, leadership effectiveness, and relationships. Small voice adjustments can yield massive results. Contact: [email protected] for voice assessments and improvement work.

Welcome to the show! I've got a great guest with me today, a little bit of an analysis, especially around what's stopping conversions, voice stories and beliefs around what is working vs. what is protection and voice masks and how they cost sales.   Interview Summary This interview was a live voice coaching session between host and voice expert Tracy Goodwin and her guest, business owner Beverly Simpson. [01:38]  Tracy analyzed clips of Beverly's voice from a previous podcast appearance and an Instagram Live video, identifying vocal patterns that stemmed from a deep-seated need to prove her worth. [02:21]  They discussed how childhood experiences, particularly criticism from her father, created "voice masks" that caused her to sound like she was pushing, convincing, and justifying her expertise. Beverly shared her own vulnerabilities, including the fear of becoming egotistical and the deeper fear of not being "great enough." The conversation explored how these vocal habits, while contributing to her success so far, were now limiting her ability to connect authentically with her full audience and step into her next level of leadership. Interviewee Background Beverly Simpson was a former actor and a former district fitness manager for a national gym in Manhattan, where she was responsible for significant revenue and team development. For the past decade, she has been running her own business, where she helps personal trainers and other health and wellness professionals start and scale their own profitable online businesses.  

Welcome to the show! Today, I've got Rachel Coons with me and we are breaking down authenticity and taking it to the next level. I recently saw Rachel at a business conference and she told me she did one of the tactics I told her to do and it didn't work...and here's why...   Don't miss signing up for my next Masterclass.  Head over to https://www.captivatetheroom.com/voicereclaim Interview Summary Tracy Goodwin interviewed business owner Rachel Koons to demonstrate the nuances of voice coaching. [45:28] They began by revisiting a previous live coaching session where minor adjustments to Rachel's vocal delivery on a video led to significantly higher conversions. The core of the conversation focused on analyzing a recent, unsuccessful voice message campaign Rachel ran. [15:45] Tracy identified that Rachel's tone sounded rushed, detached, and apologetic for selling, which created a disconnect with potential customers. Through a live workshop, Tracy helped Rachel uncover the underlying mindset of feeling like she was "bothering" people and guided her toward a more authentic, confident, and caring vocal approach to use in her upcoming launch. [15:56] Interviewee Background Rachel Koons is a wife and mother of four who, two years prior, founded a business to help other mothers with their finances. [07:12] She started with a membership focused on a grocery-saving method she created and later expanded to cover budgeting, investing, and making money from home. [08:17] At the time of the interview, her membership community had grown to nearly 1400 members. Key Points Rachel explained that her first coaching session with Tracy helped her realize her online persona did not match her true self, and that shifting to a more authentic delivery felt better and was more effective. She learned that "talking head" videos, while receiving lower surface-level engagement, generated warmer leads and higher conversions because they fostered a genuine connection with her audience. [13:38] She shared her disappointment with a recent voice message campaign where she contacted 50 potential customers but only converted two, despite feeling she had been authentic. [15:45] Rachel admitted that during that campaign, she was rushed and focused on completing a checklist, which contributed to a tone of disconnect. [17:52] She revealed her core discomfort stemmed from not wanting to pressure people, which inadvertently came across as vocal indifference and a feeling that she was "bugging" her audience. [19:12] After hearing her own message analyzed, she recognized it lacked personal connection and sounded generic. [23:47] Rachel identified that she often wore a "mask" of being a serious coach, fearing her naturally fun and "cheerleadery" personality would not be taken seriously on the topic of money. [37:22] By the end of the session, she expressed renewed excitement to use voice messages in her next launch, with a new focus on creating a genuine, caring connection rather than simply making a sale. [39:42] Notable Quotes "Honestly, that experience for me was just realizing that what I was saying and how I was portraying myself online wasn't matching up with what I thought I was doing... [11:36] It didn't feel like I was showing up as a showman. [11:52] It felt like I was showing up as Rachel Koons helping." (11:22) - This was said as she reflected on the impact of her first live coaching session with Tracy, where she was coached on a viral video. "Who cares about engagement if you're connecting with your followers and you're increasing conversions?" (13:35) - Rachel said this while recalling a key piece of advice from Tracy that shifted her focus from vanity metrics to the quality of connection, which ultimately drove sales. [13:38] "I felt in these voice messages was like I was popping in, I was intruding on them... [20:41] it was like me bugging almost." (20:33) - She offered this as an explanation for her mindset while sending the low-converting voice messages, which directly influenced her apologetic and disconnected tone. [17:27] "I want people to know that I can be super fun, but I also can get to the deeper stuff as well. [37:22] So I put on this mask of I can't be that fun cheerleader." (37:12) - This quote came during a moment of self-realization, where she explained why she suppressed her natural personality, fearing it would undermine her credibility as a financial coach. [37:22] Kicker Quotes "Now I'm like, oh, I'm so excited to do launch because I feel like it's going to feel better for me... [40:03] and I don't care if people join or not. That's not the end goal here. It's that I feel like I am helping the people that I'm meant to help." "I do feel like I'm at a point in my business where I'm over the numbers. [43:28] I'm over just the masses. I am way more focused on the right people calling in the right people, connecting with those individuals than I was before." [44:08] "This is the solution that you've been looking for and I know that, and I am committed to helping you on your journey." [33:46]

Welcome to the show! Today, I've got Kath Patrick with me and you are going to be blown away how she sees the voice as the deal breaker with her clients and so much more!   Kath Patrick https://www.nonprofitpowerpodcast.com  www.linkedin.com/in/kathpatrick-strategicsense Kath Patrick helps non-profit leaders solve the problem of chronic under-investment in their work. Her clients learn how to turn the money and policy decisionmakers in their world into willing investors who are happy to pay for the full value of the results you create.   Kath’s journey as a lifelong advocate and nonprofit leader at the local, state and national level has taught her what works and what doesn’t to deeply engage decisionmakers and build powerful influence with them. In the process, she’s discovered that a lot of the things leaders were taught to do, really don’t work. She helps her clients let go of what’s not working, and build the skills they need to deeply engage decisionmakers and get them fully invested in the life-changing work you do.   Kath is also the host of The Nonprofit Power Podcast, where every week she explores the secrets to building powerful influence with the decisionmakers that matter. Episode Overview Guest: Kath Patrick Host: Tracy Goodwin Theme: How voice, delivery, and human connection directly impact influence, funding, and results in the nonprofit and leadership space. This episode dives deep into how nonprofit leaders unintentionally “lose the deal” — not because of weak data or logic, but because of how they sound. Kath and Tracy unpack how tone, pace, vocal masks (Professional, Needing to Prove, Foreshadowing), and lack of emotional connection derail influence with decision-makers. It’s a conversation that bridges the Psychology of the Voice® with policy, power, and persuasion. Core Themes & Insights 1. The Real Reason Nonprofits Lose Funding Kath reveals that the downfall isn’t poor programs — it’s miscommunication. Leaders assume decision-makers understand their world, when in reality, they don’t. The result: data dumps, jargon, and monotone delivery that fails to inspire action. “Facts and data don’t engage… until the decision-maker understands why it matters.” 2. The Voice as the Hidden Dealbreaker Tracy connects Kath’s experience to voice psychology — the way tone and subconscious habits sabotage outcomes: Foreshadowing mask: expecting rejection before speaking. Needing-to-Prove mask: over-explaining and overperforming to earn approval. Professional mask: stripping away humanity to sound “credible,” which instead kills connection. “They’re brilliant with donors — and they crumble in front of decision-makers, turning into a walking PowerPoint.” 3. Connection Beats Data Both emphasize that storytelling, emotion, and presence win the deal — not rapid-fire facts. Decision-makers engage once they feel the transformation and visualize the impact. “If you don’t connect, why would they care at the level you do?” 4. High Stakes = Old Habits Under pressure, even seasoned leaders revert to protective habits: Speaking faster to “get it over with” Reading the room reactively instead of adjusting intentionally Trying to sound impressive instead of authentic Kath’s antidote: practice surprising them in the first two seconds — “Say something unexpected. Ask a question. Anything but a generic intro.” 5. Authenticity as the New Professionalism Tracy and Kath dismantle the myth that being “professional” means being robotic or emotionally flat. True influence comes from being fully human — voice, emotion, and all. “You’re not doing a keg stand on the conference table. You can be real and professional.” Key Takeaways Voice determines trust and investment. The sound of authority isn’t about volume or polish — it’s about connection. Emotion is strategy. Decision-makers fund what they feel compelled by, not just what they understand. Speed kills impact. Talking fast signals nerves and causes disconnection. Authenticity converts. Bringing humanity into the room is what turns influence into partnership. Timestamped Structure Time Segment Highlights 00:00–02:00 Intro Tracy’s voice philosophy + Kath’s alignment with her work 02:00–08:00 Kath’s mission The problem of chronic underinvestment + how decision-makers create barriers 08:00–16:00 Decision-maker psychology Why rules and control exist; how to influence from empathy 16:00–24:00 Voice mistakes Foreshadowing, proving, and professionalism explained 24:00–30:00 High-stakes behavior How stress reactivates protection habits and voice masks 30:00–35:00 Redefining professionalism “Professional ≠ disconnected” — authenticity as power 35:00–40:00 Kath’s origin story From teenage activist to policy strategist 40:00–47:00 Teaching influence Why connection and emotional storytelling secure investment 47:00–48:00 Closing reflection Tracy and Kath discuss how voice is the invisible thread behind success Memorable Quotes “Don’t take your 20-minute monologue and shove it into 10 minutes — surprise them in the first two seconds.” “Facts and data don’t convince anyone; connection does.” “Why would you try to sound more like AI when the only thing AI can’t do is make people feel?” “Professional doesn’t mean perfect — it means present.” “If they’re not listening, I don’t care how much data you give them — they won’t hear it.”

Welcome to the show!  I've got a great guest and a great episode for you today. Dr. Stephanie Lopez with me today. Dr. Steph is a former NASA Psychologist and the founder of The BRAVE Method. She’s known for guiding women to break through anxiety, heal, and get out of fight or fight for good. Broken to Brave Podcast: https://brokentobrave.buzzsprout.com Free Training: www.brave-method.com/anxiety Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/drstephanielopez/    Interview Summary In this interview, host Tracy Goodwin spoke with Dr. Stephanie Lopez, a former NASA psychologist turned healing coach. [04:32] Dr. Lopez discussed her unique perspective on anxiety, defining it as the mismanagement of emotions that resulted from a lifetime of being taught to suppress feelings and cut short the natural emotional cycle. [08:39] She explained how this suppression led to anxiety, people-pleasing, and perfectionism.  [27:35] Dr. Lopez shared her personal journey, which began with a transformational workshop at NASA, and outlined her approach to healing, which emphasized increasing one's tolerance for feeling all emotions, understanding the somatic nature of emotional regulation, and breaking free from limiting self-identities.  [10:07] The conversation also explored the mechanics of people-pleasing, the importance of a nuanced emotional vocabulary, and the power of experiential work in creating lasting change. [25:23]   Key Points Dr. Lopez defined anxiety not as a permanent condition but as the result of mismanaging emotions, specifically by suppressing them and preventing them from completing their natural cycle. [08:49] She argued that from a young age, most people were conditioned to "cut off" their emotions, which led to a buildup of unprocessed feelings that manifested as anxiety, ruminating thoughts, and even physical pain. [11:01] She stated that "overthinking is under-feeling," explaining that attempts to control every outcome were driven by an unwillingness to feel potential negative emotions like embarrassment or incompetence. [15:34] The key to gaining control, she proposed, was to increase one's tolerance to feel all emotions. [14:36] When one was willing to feel anything, external circumstances and other people's reactions lost their power. [14:36] People-pleasing was described as an attempt to control others' feelings to avoid one's own discomfort, which paradoxically could erode trust in relationships. [25:28] She emphasized that true emotional regulation was primarily a somatic (body-based) experience, and that intellectual understanding alone was insufficient for deep, lasting healing. [24:01]

Welcome to the show! You are in for a TREAT!  One of my favorite people on earth is on the show today, Alexa Junge.  You might not recognize her name but you will recognize her work.  Alexa was a writer on Friends, West Wing, Sex and the City and so many more shows you love. Alexa is joining me because we are about to embark on a 2-day intensive to find the real stories that you are meant to tell and then be able to use your voice so that they land. You can find out more here:  https://www.captivatetheroom.com/realstory/   Interview Summary Tracy Goodwin, host of the "Captivate the Room" podcast, interviewed accomplished television writer and producer Alexa Yung. Alexa discussed her extensive career in Hollywood, sharing behind-the-scenes insights from writing for iconic shows like Friends and The West Wing. The core of the conversation focused on her philosophy of storytelling, emphasizing the importance of creating from the "inside out" by focusing on character, emotional truth, and authentic connection. She argued that these principles of dramatic writing are directly applicable to entrepreneurs, speakers, and anyone looking to create compelling content. The interview concluded with the announcement of an upcoming collaborative workshop hosted by both Alexa and Tracy, aimed at helping entrepreneurs find their authentic voice and story. Interviewee Background Alexa Junge was presented as one of the most accomplished showrunners and executive producers in television. Her credits included acclaimed series such as Friends, Sex and the City, The West Wing, and Big Love. Her work has earned numerous awards and nomination. She was noted for her unique voice and range, with her Friends episode "The One Where Everybody Finds Out" being named one of Rolling Stone's best TV episodes of all time. The interviewer, Tracy Goodwin, is an internationally known voice expert and award-winning speaker.   Key Points Effective storytelling must originate from an "inside out" approach, rooted in the emotional core and motivations of the characters, rather than being built on external formulas. The most successful humor and dialogue came from the specific character's personality. On Friends, a joke was discarded if any character could have said it, ensuring authenticity. Creating a genuine emotional connection with the audience was paramount. A story that affects someone on a physical, emotional level becomes memorable and impactful. Authenticity was more powerful than imitation. Copying what seems successful for others leads to generic content, whereas embracing one's unique perspective and story helps to stand out. The goal was not to be liked, but to be compelling. Letting one's true, "sparkly" self show through was more interesting than trying to please everyone. Understanding a character's (or one's own) "original wound" or "secret agony" was a vital tool for creating depth, even if that information was never explicitly revealed in the final story. The structural and emotional principles of screenwriting could be directly applied to business presentations, social media content, and sales pitches to make them more engaging. Notable Quotes "If you lose track of what you are interested in, it isn't going to be successful." (00:01) - Said at the very beginning, this quote established Alexa's core thesis that personal passion and interest are the foundation of any successful creative or business endeavor. "The jokes came from character. And we would say, is this a joke that any of them could make? And if the answer was yes, we would keep working." (15:42) - Alexa stated this while explaining the meticulous, character-driven writing process on Friends, highlighting why the show's humor felt so specific and authentic. "If it isn't connected to the characters underlying question of their life, it's kind of the like, why are we even writing this?" (23:40) - In this quote, she criticized formulaic storytelling that ignores deep character motivation, arguing that plot is meaningless without a personal stake for the protagonist. "If somebody's pushing or doing what they think they should be doing, you feel bad for them." (33:45) - She said this while discussing the palpable feeling of inauthenticity in presentations and marketing, noting that it evokes pity rather than engagement from the audience.