383: Understanding and Supporting Your Anxious Middle Schooler

Mother’s Day can be sweet, stressful, or just plain disappointing—sometimes all at once! In today’s episode, Karen and Emily get real about unmet expectations, social media comparison, and the emotional weight this day can carry. They also share stories from their own celebrations—some simple, some funny, and some that didn’t go as planned. Whether you're anticipating brunch with your people or dreading a day that feels heavy, this conversation will remind you: it’s okay to name what you need and celebrate in a way that feels meaningful to you.Episode Recap:1:37 - Mother’s Day can be a mixed bag of emotions3:35- There’s a lot of pressure surrounding celebrating well7:00- Social media can quickly steal your joy9:05 - How can we communicate what we want for Mother’s Day effectively?12:30 - What if you want a special day but you know your family won’t plan anything?16:21 - How do you navigate a difficult Mother’s Day? Scripture for Reflection: Romans 12:15 (NIV)“Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.”Questions for Discussion:What emotions does Mother’s Day bring up for you this year—joy, sorrow, both?Have you ever been disappointed by an unmet expectation on this day? What did you learn from it?What would your ideal Mother’s Day actually look like—and how can you communicate that clearly?How can you support another mom who may be hurting or overwhelmed this year?Resources:Don’t miss the boat! Register for Soar at Sea today: https://www.soaratsea.comDownload the BOAW app to send us your questions! https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927

Your college student has changed—and so has your family. In today’s episode, Karen and Emily talk about preparing for the emotional and practical realities of having a college student return home for the summer. From setting clear expectations to embracing the growth in your child, you'll walk away with practical tips (and encouragement) to navigate this bittersweet transition with grace!Episode Recap:3:45 - Karen shares how re-entry was with different kids coming home from college8:08- How can I temper my expectations before my kiddo comes home? 11:05 - Encourage your college student to get a job!13:00 - How do we prepare our younger kids for their sibling’s reentry?15:52 - What’s reasonable to ask of my college kid while they’re home? 21:34 - Is it ok for me to tell my college kid how their actions made me feel? If so, what’s the best way to do that?25:19 - We have to allow our children to grow and learn on their own because God is at work in their lives. Don’t try to smooth the road out for them, let them learn.Scripture for Reflection: Ecclesiastes 3:1 (NIV)"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens."Questions for Discussion:How has your family dynamic changed since your child left for college?What expectations do you need to reset—both for yourself and for your college student—before they return home?How can you communicate boundaries and responsibilities clearly without treating your college student like a child?In what ways can you celebrate and embrace who your child is becoming as a young adult?Resources:Don’t miss the boat! Register for Soar at Sea today: https://www.soaratsea.comDownload the BOAW app to send us your questions! https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927

When your husband’s job pulls him away from home, it can leave you holding the weight of family life alone—and it’s exhausting. Today Karen is answering questions from moms whose husbands are frequently gone due to their line of work. From managing toddler tantrums and homeschooling to navigating resentment and self-pity, Karen shares hard-won wisdom from her own years in the trenches. Don’t miss Karen’s honest encouragement about what it means to trust God and stay grounded through the hard seasons! Episode Recap:2:35 - Karen’s husband Greg travelled extensively with his job during their early family years6:10 - How did you manage the inconsistency in your husband’s work schedule? 10:25 - We have to bring God into our daily walk as moms, He will sustain us11:30 - My husband works in a traumatic field, how do I support him without letting the darkness and stress of his job affect our family?15:05 - How do I help my husband get on board with what I’m doing at home since he’s away so often18:23 - Emily’s tips for keeping preschooler occupied while mom homeschools other child21:15 - I’m a working mom and my husband is in residency. I struggle with resentment and self-pity, how did you handle these emotions? Scripture for Reflection: Psalm 73:26 (NIV)“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”Questions for Discussion:What do you find most difficult when your husband is away—emotionally, practically, or spiritually?Have you ever struggled with self-pity or resentment in your parenting journey? What helped you move forward?Karen talks about letting go of the “scoreboard” in marriage and not expecting equal contribution all the time. How does that idea sit with you?What are some practical ways you could invite God into your hard season right now?If you’re parenting a strong-willed toddler, which of Karen and Emily’s ideas could you try this week?Resources:Download the BOAW app to send us your questions! https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927Don’t miss the boat! Register for Soar at Sea today: https://www.soaratsea.comCheck out the Scoreboard of Life session within Karen’s The Six Truths of Motherhood curriculum: https://store.birdsonawiremoms.com/collections/available-for-purchase/products/six-truths-study-guide

Today we’re talking about Good Friday —and reflecting on why something so awful was called ‘good.’ Karen walks through the events leading up to the cross, explains why Jesus had to die, and answers some common (and hard!) questions your kids and teens might be asking. Whether your children are little or nearly grown, we hope this conversation equips you to talk about Jesus’ sacrifice and bring the hope of Easter into your home this week.Episode Recap:2:10 - We don’t have to know everything, moms! But it’s our job to point our kids to answers2:36 - Recap of events leading up to Good Friday5:42 - Matthew 27:51-53 shares some incredible things that happened when Jesus died8:44 - Jesus willing endured the Cross for us - that makes Friday good!9:30 - Why did Jesus have to die? Wasn’t there another way?12:51 - Jesus was fully man and fully God, He is our High Priest13:35- Forgiveness doesn’t mean justice is ignored14:24 - How do we know Jesus’ death was real? What about the Resurrection?20:16 - What are practical ways to bring your family together around the story of Good Friday and Easter?24:00 - Don’t be afraid of your kids’ questions, dive in together and look for the truth! Scripture for Reflection: Isaiah 53:5 (NIV) “But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed.”Questions for Discussion:What makes Good Friday “good,” even though it was such a dark day?How can we engage well with our kids when they ask hard questions about Jesus’ death or the resurrection?What does it mean to you personally that Jesus said, “Not my will, but yours be done”?How can your family focus on Jesus this Easter in a meaningful way—especially if your kids aren’t naturally interested?Resources:Download the BOAW app to send us your questions! https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927Don’t miss the boat! Register for Soar at Sea today: https://www.soaratsea.com

From dealing with toddlers who constantly say "no!" to navigating three-year-old stubbornness, today Karen is answering your questions and sharing practical strategies to help you respond with consistency and grace. You’ll learn how to set boundaries that stick and understand why repetition is key to laying a foundation of obedience. Whether you're managing meltdowns or guiding a strong-willed child, this episode will equip you to keep calm and parent on!Episode Recap:2:43 - Is age two or three more difficult?4:41 - My four yr old doesn’t listen and it puts him in danger! How can I get him to take me seriously?7:15 - Toddlers HAVE to know that you are going to follow through!8:50 - I’m constantly threatening my 2.5 yr old daughter with consequences for not obeying, is she only obeying out of fear?11:00 - My 7 year old daughter has no motivation to do anything! How do I get her to get moving? 14:25 - Talk to your child’s teacher if their homework seems to take them forever at home, there could be something to pay attention to there.18:55 - Help! My husband and I are at our wit’s end with our combative 4 year old. Scripture for Reflection: Galatians 6:9 (NIV)"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."Questions for Discussion:What are some challenges you face with your toddler or preschooler’s strong emotions? How do you typically respond?How do you balance immediate consequences with teaching long-term obedience?What strategies have you found helpful for setting boundaries with strong-willed children?How can you maintain consistency when it feels like your child isn’t getting the message?Resources:Download the BOAW app to send us your questions! https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927Don’t miss the boat! Register for Soar at Sea today: https://www.soaratsea.comKathleen Edelman’s A Grown Up’s Guide to Kids’ Wiring: https://amzn.to/4lmF5VFWire Talk episode 433 with Wellesley Jongko: https://wiretalk.transistor.fm/episodes/433-you-can-set-your-child-up-for-readin

The stakes feel high when you’re parenting teenagers, but you don’t have to go it alone! Today Karen is answering questions from moms facing challenges as they are navigating the teen years. From dealing with inappropriate relationships and emotional struggles to setting boundaries and having tough conversations, Karen offers encouragement to help you parent with confidence. Whether your teen is acting out or just feeling melancholic, you'll find practical wisdom and support in this candid conversation.Episode Recap:4:06- It’s critical to be a parent rather than a friend during the teen years.6:48- My 16 yr old is texting inappropriate pictures with his girlfriend, what do we do?11:49- Strategies for connecting with a melancholic teen.16:50- My college-age child is making poor choices when it comes to grades/work ethic - what does tough love look like?23:07- How do I firmly address drug/alcohol use concerns with young adults who aren’t living at home anymore?26:21- My 16 year old is dealing with depression and thoughts of self-harm - help!Scripture for Reflection: Proverbs 22:6 (NIV)"Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it."Questions for Discussion:Do you struggle with balancing being a parent versus being a friend to your teenager?Think of a time your teen has made a poor choice. Did you manage your own emotions well while addressing the behavior? If not, what would it look like to have a re-do in that particular situation?What role does prayer play in your parenting during the teen years? What are 3 things you can be praying for your teen right now? Write them down and hold one another accountable to praying daily for those things in our teens’ lives.Resources:Check out our studio glow up on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@birdsonawiremomsDon’t miss the boat! Register for Soar at Sea today: https://www.soaratsea.comListen to Raising Emotionally Strong Boys with David Thomas: https://wiretalk.transistor.fm/episodes/347-raising-emotionally-strong-boys-with-david-thomas

From preschool power struggles to teenage arguments, this episode is full of real mom moments. Today, Karen’s answering your questions on sibling conflict, possessiveness, and strong-willed kids. Whether it’s a four year old not wanting to share, or a teenager pushing against boundaries, Karen reminds us that parenting isn’t about controlling every outcome—it’s about cultivating character, modeling grace, and being a steady presence as kids grow and learn.Episode Recap:5:24- How do I help my child get over her excessive possessiveness? 9:50 - Should I get involved over the messiness of my daughters’ room? 12:18- My teens’ argumentativeness ruins the mood of our entire family, help! 17:55- How can I help cultivate a close relationship between siblings? Scripture for Reflection: Ephesians 4:2 (NIV)“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”Questions for Discussion:Have you ever struggled with a child being overly possessive or anxious about their belongings? What has helped (or what would you try based on this episode)?How do you handle arguments with your strong-willed children, especially when they push back against authority? Is what you’re doing working? What’s one way you’ve helped your kids build or maintain a strong sibling bond?How do you balance honoring your child’s temperament with helping them grow in areas like generosity, respect, and submission?Which part of Karen’s advice in this episode resonated most with you today—and why?Resources:Check out our studio glow up on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/@birdsonawiremomsDon’t miss the boat! Register for Soar at Sea today: www.soaratsea.comWant more on parenting toward your child’s temperament? Check out A Grown Up’s Guide to Kids’ Wiring: https://amzn.to/4c34sYCListen to Karen’s episode with Abby: https://wiretalk.transistor.fm/episodes/wt-284-worth-the-fight-with-karen-and-abbyGrab a copy of Karen’s devotional for Teen Girls: https://store.birdsonawiremoms.com/collections/all-active-products/products/preorder-teen-devotionalWant to know your or your child’s temperament? Take our FREE Colors Quiz! www.boaw.mom/quiz 

Navigating hard conversations can feel like walking a tightrope, especially when it comes to extended family! Today Karen is answering your questions about setting boundaries, honoring traditions while carving out your own space, and maintaining peace without losing your voice. We hope you’ll take away some practical nuggets for the next time you find yourself facing a difficult conversation. Episode Recap:5:20 How do I know when to stand up for myself and when to bend?6:22 My husband’s family celebrates religious holidays in a purely secular way. I’m always frustrated by it when we are with them! What can I do? 10:18 We feel guilted into vacationing with extended family every year when it really doesn’t work for us anymore. It has become a source of tension between my husband and I. How do we navigate this? 15:26 How do I “uninvite” our babysitter on our family vacation??!20:00 My dad doesn’t want to see us at the holidays because he says we haven’t seen him/done enough with him all year long. How do I approach him? Scripture for Reflection: James 1:5 (NIV) "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you."Questions for Discussion:Did you relate to Karen’s story about being “afraid” of the 7 year old neighbor? Do unpleasant conversations make you nervous? Have you experienced tension around family traditions or expectations?Do you have particular family members you find it difficult to communicate with?When navigating family gatherings or vacations, what boundaries have you established that have been helpful?How can you invite God into these difficult conversations for wisdom and peace?What steps can you take to ensure your core family unit is nurtured and protected, even amidst extended family obligations?Resources:- Don’t miss the boat! Register for Soar at Sea today: www.soaratsea.com - Check out Wire Talk’s viral clip - https://youtube.com/shorts/yd-lyxHD0HU?feature=share- Take the free colors quiz - www.boaw.mom/quiz

Grief and joy don’t have to be opposites—sometimes, they go hand in hand. In this tender conversation, Annie F. Downs shares the story behind Where Did TJ Go?, a book she co-authored with her sister to help families navigate the loss of a child. Annie opens up about how her nephew TJ’s brief but impactful life deepened their family’s bond and taught them the beauty of holding joy and sorrow together. Whether you’ve experienced loss yourself or want to support a grieving family, this episode is filled with wisdom, encouragement, and hope.Episode Recap:4:26- Annie F. Downs joins us today!5:40- Prior to TJ’s death, Annie’s family was not nearly as close 8:00- Annie’s sister discovered she was pregnant with a child who had a life limiting diagnosis 10:45- Aunts and uncles get to say yes, so do it often! 12:45- How can we love on families who are raising kids while grieving? 14:30- Where Did TJ Go?  is a conduit for families to connect while grieving16:00- There is good news in sad stories, this is a Gospel story20:50- Get a bookplate customized with the name of a child you want to honorScripture for Reflection: Romans 12:15 (NIV) "Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn."Questions for Discussion:Annie talked about how grief and joy can coexist. Have you seen this play out in your own life or in the lives of those around you?How can we, as moms, create space for our children to express their emotions—both happy and sad—without feeling like they have to choose one over the other?Annie’s family found a surprising closeness through their loss. Have you experienced a hardship that has brought you closer to family? How did it change your relationships?What are some ways we can support grieving families, especially those with young children, in a way that honors their loss while also bringing hope?Resources:Pick up Where Did TJ Go? anywhere books are sold: https://amzn.to/4kxSYzTGet a bookplate customized with a name you want to honor at wheredidtjgo.comLast chance to register for the Soar Conference! Don’t procrastinate another day: https://subsplash.com/birdsonawire-ga/lb/ev/+j2j9wpqConnect with Annie: https://www.anniefdowns.com/

What is it like to raise children in the middle of a war? In this special episode, Karen sits down with Kimmie Saado, an American mom raising her five kids in Israel, to hear about the realities of life during conflict. From sirens and safe rooms to worshiping through fear, Kimmie shares how faith has anchored her family in uncertain times. Listen in as she encourages moms to raise up the next generation of Daniels—children who stand firm in faith, no matter the circumstances.Episode Recap:1:26- Kimmie is an American mom raising five kids in Israel3:03- How Kimmie and Sahar met and challenges of cross-cultural dating/engagement7:50- What it’s like to lead a Bible tour company in Israel13:20- Karen and Kimmie’s favorite places in Israel15:45- what has it been like to raise children in a conflict zone?19:39- how Kimmie’s son led their family in worship during moments of fear.22:30- how faith-filled habits help equip our kids and others to stand firm in faith.24:31- what does it mean to be a “Daniel”?28:15- what Kimmie and Sahar are doing in the States this year30:00- how Americans can pray and support the Jewish people right now37:30- we have made God so small and our problems so bigScripture for Reflection: 2 Timothy 1:7 (NIV)“For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.”Questions for Discussion:Kimmie shared a vivid story about responding to a bombing by shouting a Bible verse and also, how her son responded to bombing sirens with worship. How do you model turning to your faith in scary times? Do your kids get to witness that? What does it mean to raise a "Daniel" in today’s world? How can we instill resilience and faith in our children?Kimmie and her husband took intentional steps to prepare for challenges before those challenges arrived. How can we spiritually equip our families before trials come?Kimmie spoke about finding peace in God’s presence, even in uncertainty. What are some practical ways we can cultivate that kind of faith in our own lives?Resources:Last chance to register for the Soar Conference! Don’t procrastinate another day: https://subsplash.com/birdsonawire-ga/lb/ev/+j2j9wpqCheck out Kimmie and Sahar’s company: Israel Bible Tours: https://www.israelbibletours.com/