EP 230: You Haven’t Lost Your Spark

EP 230: You Haven’t Lost Your Spark If you’ve been moving through life on autopilot, feeling flat, numb, or disconnected from yourself this episode is for you. Not because something is “wrong” with you… but because your nervous system is done carrying what was never meant to be permanent. Burnout isn’t a personality flaw. Losing your spark isn’t a failure. And this season isn’t here to punish you it’s here to wake you up. In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships, I break down why so many women feel like they’ve lost their spark and why trying to “get back to the old you” is actually keeping you stuck. This isn’t about romanticising your life or forcing gratitude when you’re depleted. This is mindset + embodiment + shadow work the holy trinity. I walk you through the five shifts that actually bring your spark back every time by restoring self-trust, reclaiming your energy, and reconnecting you to your aliveness. Here’s a few things I unpack in this episode: Why Autopilot Is a Nervous System Response Burnout vs Self-Abandonment Why Productivity Is Killing Your Aliveness Pleasure, Play & Erotic Energy (Without Making It Sexual) You don’t need to find your spark. You need to stop abandoning yourself. And this episode shows you exactly how. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-womanSign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning Website: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships, we're building the blueprint for your most grounded, self-led, and successful year ever. Not because the calendar magically fixes your life - but because you decide to show up as the woman who no longer drags old chaos into her new chapter. 2026 is a blank slate. A reset. A clean energetic line in the sand. And the version of you who thrives next year is built from identity, habits, emotional maturity, and standards… not "new year, new me" delusion. I walk you through the exact ways to anchor into self-belief, detox 2025 without spiralling into shame, rebuild your habits, upgrade your mindset, call in healthy love, and become the woman whose life reflects her standards - not just her Pinterest board.   Here's what I unpack in this episode:   Claiming 2026 as Your Fresh Start Identity - Evidence Reflecting on 2025 Like a Grown Woman Habits That Match Your Goals Your 2026 Vision Intentionality Over Performance Expanding Your Comfort Zone The 1% Rule Big Dreams, Small Actions Protecting Your Energy Mindset Mastery Your Environment & Community Defining Success on Your Terms Progress Over Perfection Celebrating Every Win Reinvesting in Yourself Raising Your Standards in Love Breaking the Anxious/Avoidant Loop Shadow Work on Your Standards Embodying Your Worth Choosing Intimacy Over Chaos Becoming the Woman Who Lives Her Standards   WORK WITH MICHELLE:   Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: ⁠https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman⁠   Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): ⁠https://michellepanning.com/the-experience⁠   Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: ⁠https://michellepanning.com/awakening⁠   CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: ⁠http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning⁠ Website: ⁠http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships, we’re building the blueprint for your most grounded, self-led, and successful year ever. Not because the calendar magically fixes your life - but because you decide to show up as the woman who no longer drags old chaos into her new chapter.2026 is a blank slate. A reset. A clean energetic line in the sand. And the version of you who thrives next year is built from identity, habits, emotional maturity, and standards… not “new year, new me” delusion.I walk you through the exact ways to anchor into self-belief, detox 2025 without spiralling into shame, rebuild your habits, upgrade your mindset, call in healthy love, and become the woman whose life reflects her standards - not just her Pinterest board.Here’s what I unpack in this episode:Claiming 2026 as Your Fresh StartIdentity - EvidenceReflecting on 2025 Like a Grown WomanHabits That Match Your GoalsYour 2026 VisionIntentionality Over PerformanceExpanding Your Comfort ZoneThe 1% RuleBig Dreams, Small ActionsProtecting Your EnergyMindset MasteryYour Environment & CommunityDefining Success on Your TermsProgress Over PerfectionCelebrating Every WinReinvesting in YourselfRaising Your Standards in LoveBreaking the Anxious/Avoidant LoopShadow Work on Your StandardsEmbodying Your WorthChoosing Intimacy Over ChaosBecoming the Woman Who Lives Her StandardsWORK WITH MICHELLE:Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-womanSign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experienceSign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakeningCONNECT WITH MICHELLE:Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanningWebsite: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships*, we're stepping into the most misunderstood and most misused part of feminine energy: the dark feminine. Not the TikTok version. Not the "manipulate him back" bullshit. The real dark feminine. The part of you that is bold, grounded, self-protective, deeply self-respecting, and absolutely unwilling to keep abandoning herself for crumbs.   Most women are living 90% in their light feminine… the sweet, nurturing, soft version of themselves and then wonder why they feel drained, overlooked, over-giving, mothering grown men, and acting like the emotional support animal of their friendships. The truth?   Your light feminine didn't fail you. You were simply never taught how to access the other half of your power.   In this episode, I break down how to awaken the dark feminine in a way that is empowering, not chaotic… liberating, not manipulative… and how she becomes the version of you that will literally save your fucking life.   Here's what I dive into:   Light vs Dark Feminine Dark Feminine ≠ Manipulation Being Willing to Be the Villain Raising Your Standards Feminine Assertiveness Mystery + Moving in Silence Self-Devotion — Your Level-Up Era Integration — How to Activate This Today   This episode is your permission slip to enter the era where you don't just hope for better — you enforce it. Your dark feminine isn't dangerous. She's divine. And she's been waiting for you.   WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman   Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience   Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening   CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning Website: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships*, we’re stepping into the most misunderstood and most misused part of feminine energy: the dark feminine. Not the TikTok version. Not the “manipulate him back” bullshit. The real dark feminine. The part of you that is bold, grounded, self-protective, deeply self-respecting, and absolutely unwilling to keep abandoning herself for crumbs.Most women are living 90% in their light feminine… the sweet, nurturing, soft version of themselves and then wonder why they feel drained, overlooked, over-giving, mothering grown men, and acting like the emotional support animal of their friendships. The truth?Your light feminine didn’t fail you. You were simply never taught how to access the other half of your power. In this episode, I break down how to awaken the dark feminine in a way that is empowering, not chaotic… liberating, not manipulative… and how she becomes the version of you that will literally save your fucking life.Here’s what I dive into:Light vs Dark FeminineDark Feminine ≠ ManipulationBeing Willing to Be the VillainRaising Your StandardsFeminine AssertivenessMystery + Moving in SilenceSelf-Devotion — Your Level-Up EraIntegration — How to Activate This TodayThis episode is your permission slip to enter the era where you don’t just hope for better — you enforce it. Your dark feminine isn’t dangerous. She’s divine. And she’s been waiting for you.WORK WITH MICHELLE:Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-womanSign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experienceSign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakeningCONNECT WITH MICHELLE:Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanningWebsite: http://www.michellepanning.com

EP 227: How to Level Up So Fast It Feels Illegal In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, we're diving into the identity level shifts required to level up so quickly it almost feels wrong. The truth? You're not stuck because of timing, luck, or the men you date. You're stuck because your nervous system is still wired for chaos, crumbs, and chasing and you keep choosing what's familiar over what's actually good for you. I break down the real reasons you keep looping in the same patterns and how to step into the version of you who doesn't tolerate inconsistency, confusion, or emotional breadcrumbs. This is where your "Secure Her" identity gets built not from goals, but from standards, self-respect, and micro-moments of alignment. Here's what I unpack in this episode: Why You're Stuck It's not the universe or bad luck. It's the identity you're operating from and the parts of you (anxious girl, avoidant girl, cool girl, little girl) running the show. Defining Your Next-Level Self Who is "Secure Her"? What does she tolerate? What becomes a hard no? And if the world was watching you 24/7… would you be proud? Meeting the Version of You Who Already Lives There The you with standards, follow-through, nourishment, rest, boundaries, and self-respect. What does she do that you're not doing? What has she stopped tolerating? The Brutal Gap Check Where your life doesn't match your mouth: who you text, who you sleep with, your friendships, your food, your sleep, and how you talk to yourself. Your results = your standards in action. Closing the Gap With Micro-Standards One small high-standard action per day. Don't text him back. Go to bed earlier. Speak up. Walk away from what isn't a match. Let your nervous system learn that it's safe to be the new you. Expecting Backlash + Resistance Old friends will notice. Men who benefitted from your low standards will push back. Your inner child will panic because familiar feels safe. This is GOOD. Reframing the Discomfort "I'm not losing people I'm losing patterns." "I'm not being dramatic I'm raising my standards." "It's not scary it's new." At the core, leveling up this fast isn't about becoming someone new. It's about returning to the version of you who was always there the one with discernment, self-trust, and standards that feel like a full-body yes. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning Website: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships*, we're going deep into the truth about female friendships, support, and the energetics behind the women you keep around you. Because here's the reality: You cannot build a powerful life while surrounding yourself with women who are secretly competing with you, resenting you, or only "supportive" when you're not doing better than them. And yet so many women tolerate friendships that drain them, make them shrink, or leave them feeling like they have to downplay their wins so someone else doesn't get jealous. That's not friendship. That's scarcity disguised as connection. This episode is your reminder that you deserve women who CELEBRATE you, not tolerate you. Women who want to see you shine. Women who support your growth instead of being threatened by it. Because aligned friendships don't cost you energy—they give you energy. Here's what I unpack in this episode: Jealous Friends Come From Scarcity Why some women get triggered by your success, your confidence, or your joy—and why their reaction is actually about their own lack, not your shine. The Desire to Be Supported How wanting support is not "needy," and how to consciously choose women who can hold you, cheer for you, and love you without competition. Friendships That Feel Like Celebration What it looks like to have women who genuinely want to see you win, and why being surrounded by expanders completely shifts your self-worth and standards. Energy Vampires & Dread Friendships The red flags of friendships you've outgrown, especially when you find yourself dreading seeing them, managing their emotions, or leaving the interaction drained. Why Upgrading Your Friend Circle Is Inevitable When You Grow The uncomfortable truth that not everyone gets to come with you when you rise… and how to release friendships with grace instead of guilt. At the core, this episode is about elevating your standards for the women you allow into your world. Because high-value women don't keep people around who pull them back into smallness. They choose connection that feels grounding, reciprocal, celebratory, and safe. You deserve friendships that expand you—not friendships you need to recover from. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning Website: http://www.michellepanning.com

In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, we’re diving into the identity level shifts required to level up so quickly it almost feels wrong. The truth? You’re not stuck because of timing, luck, or the men you date. You’re stuck because your nervous system is still wired for chaos, crumbs, and chasing and you keep choosing what’s familiar over what’s actually good for you.I break down the real reasons you keep looping in the same patterns and how to step into the version of you who doesn’t tolerate inconsistency, confusion, or emotional breadcrumbs. This is where your “Secure Her” identity gets built not from goals, but from standards, self-respect, and micro-moments of alignment.Here’s what I unpack in this episode:Why You’re Stuck It’s not the universe or bad luck. It’s the identity you’re operating from and the parts of you (anxious girl, avoidant girl, cool girl, little girl) running the show.Defining Your Next-Level Self Who is “Secure Her”? What does she tolerate? What becomes a hard no? And if the world was watching you 24/7… would you be proud?Meeting the Version of You Who Already Lives There The you with standards, follow-through, nourishment, rest, boundaries, and self-respect. What does she do that you’re not doing? What has she stopped tolerating?The Brutal Gap Check Where your life doesn’t match your mouth: who you text, who you sleep with, your friendships, your food, your sleep, and how you talk to yourself. Your results = your standards in action.Closing the Gap With Micro-Standards One small high-standard action per day. Don’t text him back. Go to bed earlier. Speak up. Walk away from what isn’t a match. Let your nervous system learn that it’s safe to be the new you.Expecting Backlash + Resistance Old friends will notice. Men who benefitted from your low standards will push back. Your inner child will panic because familiar feels safe. This is GOOD.Reframing the Discomfort “I’m not losing people I’m losing patterns.” “I’m not being dramatic I’m raising my standards.” “It’s not scary it’s new.”At the core, leveling up this fast isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about returning to the version of you who was always there the one with discernment, self-trust, and standards that feel like a full-body yes.WORK WITH MICHELLE:Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-womanSign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experienceSign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakeningCONNECT WITH MICHELLE:Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanningWebsite: http://www.michellepanning.com

Because here’s the reality:In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships*, we’re going deep into the truth about female friendships, support, and the energetics behind the women you keep around you.You cannot build a powerful life while surrounding yourself with women who are secretly competing with you, resenting you, or only “supportive” when you’re not doing better than them.And yet so many women tolerate friendships that drain them, make them shrink, or leave them feeling like they have to downplay their wins so someone else doesn’t get jealous.That’s not friendship. That’s scarcity disguised as connection.This episode is your reminder that you deserve women who CELEBRATE you, not tolerate you. Women who want to see you shine. Women who support your growth instead of being threatened by it.Because aligned friendships don’t cost you energy—they give you energy.Here’s what I unpack in this episode: Jealous Friends Come From ScarcityWhy some women get triggered by your success, your confidence, or your joy—and why their reaction is actually about their own lack, not your shine.The Desire to Be SupportedHow wanting support is not “needy,” and how to consciously choose women who can hold you, cheer for you, and love you without competition.Friendships That Feel Like CelebrationWhat it looks like to have women who genuinely want to see you win, and why being surrounded by expanders completely shifts your self-worth and standards.Energy Vampires & Dread FriendshipsThe red flags of friendships you’ve outgrown, especially when you find yourself dreading seeing them, managing their emotions, or leaving the interaction drained.Why Upgrading Your Friend Circle Is Inevitable When You GrowThe uncomfortable truth that not everyone gets to come with you when you rise… and how to release friendships with grace instead of guilt.At the core, this episode is about elevating your standards for the women you allow into your world.Because high-value women don’t keep people around who pull them back into smallness.They choose connection that feels grounding, reciprocal, celebratory, and safe.You deserve friendships that expand you—not friendships you need to recover from.WORK WITH MICHELLE:Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-womanSign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experienceSign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakeningCONNECT WITH MICHELLE:Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanningWebsite: http://www.michellepanning.com (http://www.michellepanning.com/)

WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning Website: http://www.michellepanning.com (http://www.michellepanning.com/)