464 – The Cigarettes of Damocles

In which Nightcrawler has a type; the Hill is a bad place to raise your kids up; Colossus introduces Marrow to art; we come out against autotrepanation; Mikhail Rasputin never learns; Destiny leaves clues from beyond the grave; and The Twelve looms.

In which Lenore Zann joins us to talk Rogue, Canadian politics, and her upcoming memoir!

In which “Astonishing X-Men” is something of a misnomer; Death has a good look; sometimes you just need a guy who swoops; Miles stops worrying and learns to love Nate Grey; Telekinesis is silly looking; “Wolverine” dies; and nothing really changes.

In which X-Force is kind of silly; that really isn’t what “quantum” means; polite and lawful are two entirely different things, and Sam Guthrie is only one of them; Selene vogues; and the Hellfire Club plays the dead girlfriend card.

In which Gambit is fundamentally goofy; t’ieves love research; Magneto was ripped; Professor Xavier remains a jerk; Miles attempts to convey something very fundamentally visual in an audio format; Marrow is adorable; the X-Men pretty much disband (again); and a miniseries is the opposite of a vacation.

In which the 1990s were very long; if you die in the simulation, you die in real life; Adrienne Frost is a bad person with good clothes; we judge the number 57; things just keep happening; and Penance somehow gets even more complicated.

In which Magneto may be right but is also wildly impractical; X-Force goes on a sneaking mission; Magneto isn’t mad, he’s just disappointed; Rictor and Shatterstar return; Strong is not a common surname in the Marvel universe; and being a mutant on TV doesn’t mean you’re one in the comics. X-PLAINED: How Jubilee became a vampire The most X-treme youth of them all X-Force 94-95 X-Force Annual 1999 Genosha Butler disambiguation Clown jobs A team-up predicated on an awkward breakup Hammer Town Delphi Memory boxes Several potential continuity error Names Genoshan robots Archie A hierarchy of potential fates Vershiagen Industries and/or Vershlagen Industries V2 Hanrancha Stronghold Martin Strong Freddie Michelle Balters (Neurotap) (more) (again) Communication with X-teams A sudden and depressing resolution Continuity across media Why Gambit doesn’t (usually) throw tarot cards NEXT EPISODE: The Return of the Hellions (kinda) The visual companion to this episode will be up later this week! Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

In which Synch is better with your powers than you are; Generation X gets some actual training; Artie and Leech are fully feral; everyone gets the hots for Paladin; Zeus has probably fucked a motorcycle at some point; many countries have valleys; and Adrienne Frost is terrible.

In which Devin Toohey joins Miles to discuss X-Men’s DC Comics cousin Doom Patrol, and their bastard Amalgam child, X-Patrol! X-PLAINED: X-Men vs. Doom Patrol Meet Your Doom Doom Patrol Amalgam X-Patrol Elasti-Girl (Amalgam) Shatterstarfire Beastling Ferro Man Dial H.U.S.K. X-Patrol #1 Exciting X-Patrol #1 Niles Cable Dr. Doomsday Superhero aviation Brother Brood Raveniya Niles Dayspring Technoorganic lettering Claw mechanics Magneto on X-Force Real-life Dazzler and Lila Cheney analogs NEXT EPISODE: Generation X goes to Madripoor! Want to hire J&MXPtXM producer Matt Hunter to produce your podcast? Email him! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!

In which Tommy Lee Edwards draws a damned fine everything; death gods get taken a lot less seriously when their avatars are seagulls; warm and cool colors get in a fight; Domino has no time for this bullshit; Cable and Domino wait ’til the kids are asleep; Sunspot’s alibi is too complicated; X-Force forges a pouches path; Engines are nothing but trouble; and Ry’lor the Destroyer puts himself in time out. X-PLAINED: The Norse Pantheon of 2099 X-Force #91-93 One of the best X-covers ever Our favorite Siryn story Jesse Aaronson, penitent chef Sean Cassidy, penitent dad A realistically anticlimactic breakup Cassidy/Rourke history Bring Your Daughter to Crimes Day Napoleon Sanders An epistolary montage The dusty pink word balloons of Tom Waits A missed Manos-portunity The Chaos Engine Halloween Jack Domino’s varied musical tastes Ry’lor the Destroyer Kodo the Komodo Bedlam’s extremely situational powers Astarte and Electryon Horniness as a superpower The Temple of the Dying Sun Cable & Corsair’s (lack of) history Hope, Hope, Hope, Hope, Hope, and Hope NEXT EPISODE: Miles and guest host Devin talk X-Patrol, 1996's X-Force / Doom Patrol mash-up! Want to hire J&MXPtXM producer Matt Hunter to produce your podcast? Email him! Check out the visual companion to this episode on our blog! Find us on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here! Buy rad swag at our TeePublic shop!