Episode 153: The Naughty Nine

Season's greetings, Creepazoids! This December we're indulging in a few of this podcasts favorite things (there's a Christmas song in there somewhere...). On this week's stocking stuffer, Joe and Johnny-5 take a look at King of the Hill's season nine Christmas episode "Ms. Wakefield". Days before Hank Hill's Christmas party, an old woman (voiced by Happy Days' Marion Ross) shows up to reminisce about her old childhood home. Things then take a turn when Hank discovers Ms. Wakefield intends to die in his house on Christmas, forcing him to become the bad guy whose only crime was not wanting death to cast a pall on his family's Christmas. Also in this episode, Joe briefly touches on a few recent Christmas movies he's watched this season, and we discuss the odd ambiance of mid-December holiday malaise. Fun! Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

Last time, we discussed the Christmas slasher P2. This week we follow it up with a look at that film's unofficial 2023 Hindi remake, simply titled "I Love You". Same premise, same setting, there's a holiday involved (in this case Diwali)... I don't know what surprised us more: The fact that we're even covering this movie on our podcast in the first place, or the fact that we all actually kinda liked it? For our purposes, we have a fun time comparing the two movies, and seeing what elements of the original translate to a film made halfway around the world. We fully realize three white Americans are the last people who should be discussing anything related to Diwali or Indian cinema in general, so we hope you'll bear with us as we tread some new territory for Christmas Creeps! Also! Returning guest Dr. Nick delivers a late-episode derail into video game chat about the Ace Attorney games. So never let it be said that this podcast doesn't stay extremely on-brand about absolutely everything... Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

Welcome back, spooky friends! This week, our pal Dr. Nick returns to help us discuss the 2007 slasher flick P2. It's a solid contender for Worst Movie Title Ever, but as we'll discover, the movie itself is pretty solid! It's Christmas Eve, and office worker Angela finds herself stuck in her office building with lonely security guard Thomas. Things quickly take a turn for the worst as Thomas reveals himself to be a lovelorn psycho who takes her hostage and tries to have his way with her. She escapes, and a brutal game of cat and mouse ensues. We'll dig into what makes this movie tick, how it has or hasn't aged gracefully, and the use of Christmas music as diegetic plot devices. Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

Greetings boils and ghouls! Home For The Horrordays continues this week as we bring you a Stocking Stuffer on the Tales from the Crypt episode "And All Through the House"! Based on the 1950s horror comics of the same name, Tales from the Crypt ran for seven seasons on HBO, and featured some of the biggest names in action and horror at the time. The episode we're discussing tonight comes from Back to the Future director Robert Zemeckis! After killing her husband on Christmas Eve, murderous mom Elizabeth is besieged by a deranged serial killer dressed up as Santa Claus. She can't call the cops, because there's already a dead body in the house, so she'll just have to deal with it herself! It's a gruesome, gag-filled good time. Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

Oh, you thought we weren't gonna cover Rare Exports? Think again, buddy. Home for the Horrordays continues as Joe and Bradford tackle the granddaddy of Finnish holiday horror. The scary folklore version of Santa Claus descends upon a farming community, killing caribou and kidnapping children, and it's up to young Pietari and his dad to find a way to save Christmas. Also in this episode, we taste test Coca-Cola flavored Oreos AND Oreo-flavored Coca-Cola in an effort to keep up with the gross gimmick food trends. Nothing but the best audio content for our lovely listeners! Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

We bid farewell to barbecue season as Home for the Horrordays continues! This week we're looking at Mercy Christmas, a horror/comedy about a family whose Christmas tradition is to kidnap unsuspecting victims and have them for Christmas dinner. As in eat them. Because they're cannibals. Ha ha ha! Join us as we tell the tale of Michael Briskett (yes), as he wishes for the traditional family Christmas, and gets more than he bargained for. Bradford gets angry at the family's poor cooking practices, Joe gets angry at the mountain of missed opportunities, and Johnny-5 was just angry right outta the box. Also we somehow wind up talking about Legos. Like ya do. Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

After a long summer off, we're back to ring in the most wonderful time of the year: Home for the Horrordays! On this episode we discuss the SyFy Channel original movie Icetastrophe, AKA Christmas Icetastrophe, AKA A Christmas Tale. No matter what you call it, this is a silly Day After Tomorrow knockoff in which a meteor crash lands in a small Washington town and flash freezes everything in sight. It's up to scientist Alex and townie Charlie Ratchet to save the town, while entrepreneur Crooge struggles to stay alive long enough to save his kids. Ratchet? Crooge? Yeah... It's one of those. The Christmas Carol connection is tenuous at best. Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

It's the 4th of July on this podcast, which means we're roughly halfway to Christmas! So what better way to celebrate than with the most 4th of July movie of them all: Jaws! You know Jaws. It's the granddaddy of all killer shark movies. It's Steven Spielberg's first breakout hit. It's the movie that made summer the season of blockbuster movies. And more than just being historically important, Jaws is just an all-around damn good movie. Crack open a cold Narragansett and join us as we break down everything that makes this movie tick, why it's still revered as a classic, and whether or not news of an exploding whale influenced the film's ending! Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

Summer is upon us once again, and that means it's time for a whole bunch of action movies! And in our case, that means action movies that may or may not actually have something to do with Christmas. On this episode we're looking at the 1998 Euro-heist flick Ronin! Robert De Niro and Jean Reno speed across France in pursuit of a stolen briefcase, whose contents may or may not be a danger to world peace. Also, it's Christmas! You didn't think we'd just watch Ronin for no reason, did you? Also in this episode: Bradford discusses his recent vacation to Paris, Jonathan brings up Rugrats in Paris for some reason, and we stumble backwards into the best pitch for an Austin Powers movie ever! Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0

Happy May, friends! This week's show comes to us via listener request. Life is full of twists and turns that you never expect. For instance, we never expected to be talking about the 2017 Netflix film El Camino Christmas this week, but that's exactly what we're gonna do! El Camino Christmas finds a handful of ne'er-do-well drunks, shady cops and innocent bystanders all holed up in a liquor store on Christmas Eve. Life lessons are learned, secrets unearthed, all that good stuff. Perennial Christmas favorite Tim Allen is here to force everyone to sing Christmas carols at gunpoint, which means this is the one Christmas film that accurately captures the way this podcast feels 90% of the time... Questions/Comments? Email us at [email protected] us @ChristmasCreepsVisit us on the web at ChristmasCreeps.com! Join us on our Discord channel! Intro/Outro: Happy Christmas, You Guys! (Simon Panrucker) / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0