
Grief After Suicide: Tiny Courage—The Ask You’ve Been Avoiding
Courage doesn’t have to roar; in life after suicide loss, one small ask can unlock support, information, or relief.
Journal prompt: “If Future-Me spoke up today, she’d ask me to…”
What we mean by a “small ask” (so we’re on the same page):
A small ask is specific, short, and time-bound—one clear request that lightens the load. Examples:
- Support: “Could you check in with me Sunday evening?” / “Would you sit with me on the phone for 10 minutes—no fixing, just listening?”
- Information: “Can you point me to the right form/link for X?” / “Who handles scheduling for Y?”
- Logistics/Relief: “Do you have 15 minutes Tuesday to help me sort this?” / “Could you pick up milk when you’re at the store?” / “Can you walk with me into the event and help me leave early?”
Keep it to one ask, one time window, one person/service. Clean is kind—to them and to your nervous system.
A Flicker (Hope) — Relief after a sent message
Often the worst part is holding it. Notice the ease that arrives once the ask leaves your body.
To Rebuild (Healing) — Choose your micro-ask
Pick one:
- Information: “Can you point me to the right form/link?”
- Support: “Could you check in with me this weekend?”
- Logistics: “Do you have 15 minutes Tuesday to help me sort this?”
Take a Step (Becoming) — Send it cleanly
Keep it short, kind, and specific. End with one option for timing. If the answer is no or later, you still gained clarity (and energy).
Choose-your-energy menu:
- Hollow (low): Hollow — Draft the ask in notes only. One sentence. Save.
- Healing (medium): Healing — Send one ask to a safe person or service.
- Becoming (higher): Becoming — Send two: one personal, one practical (e.g., admin/help).
Food for Thought Today:
Asking isn’t burdening; it’s distributing weight. Every clean request tells your nervous system you’re not alone—and teaches your circle how to show up the way you need.
Exhale. Keep what serves you; leave the rest. I’ll be here again tomorrow. 💜
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