The Parenting Series: Rebecca Lazarides on Becoming Mum Without Mum

I'm very excited to share this week's episode and guest with you all. Today I'm talking with friend, film producer, author and grief educator-Lizzie Pickering. Lizzie and I met back in 2022 at the UK Commission on Bereavement and haven't left each others side since. Throughout the years, Lizzie has become a dear friend and someone I admire both personally and professionally. Lizzie's relationship with grief began when her son, Harry, died aged 6 and a half after being diagnosed with a life limiting and terminal illness when he was extremely little.Throughout those years and continuing to raise her family that consisted of her two surviving children, Lizzie knew that she wanted to walk towards her grief rather than away from it. In doing so, Lizzie has gathered an extreme wealth of knowledge and compassion that has gone on to support other bereaved parents and individuals in the masses. I feel so fortunate to walk alongside Lizzie in our lines of work and what she shares in our episode today, I think you'll see why.Lizzie and I discuss in this episode the various different but recurring themes we see in our work. We wanted to showcase how common and normal they really are to help you hopefully feel less alone and perhaps more comforted. Reading Lizzie's book 'When Grief Equals Love' is a must read. You can find Lizzie and links to her book here. Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm back after my little midseason weekly break!Today's episode is the day after my Mum's 9 year anniversary. 9 whole years of living without her in bonkers to me. I went out on a stompy grief walks to ramble about it all. In this ep I'm dishing up musings on coping mechanisms and when I learned one didn't serve me anymore. What legacy means to me and how I'm getting through this years anniversary.Apologies for the wind, nature wasn't so forgiving for this recording! Or perhaps it was my mum just messing with me!Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We have arrived at the final part of the mini series of parenting without a parent. For this final episode, we're hearing from you, the GG community. Thank you to every person who sent in a written or verbal submission! Having your contribution to this mini series was vital and I can't thank you enough for your honest and vulnerable sharings!Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to part 2 of the parenting without a parent series!This week I'm speaking with Rebecca, a previous group circle attendee and now dear friend on her experience of becoming mum without mum. Rebecca shares with us her story of finding out she was pregnant shortly after her mum's sudden death and what pregnancy and motherhood was like during that time and continues to be. We discuss:Finding out your pregnant in a time of deep griefThe pressure on mum's to sustain a healthy pregnancy whilst enduring griefThe hidden pain points in expectant motherhood and grief such as midwife appointments, seeing other mums and their mums and so much moreThe fantasies, whether true or not, that we can create in speculation of what pregnancy and motherhood might have been like with our mums here How living with grief shapes mothers and how they parentHow and where you can get support both during pregnancy, early years and beyondAs you can see, this episode is jam packed! I am so grateful to Rebecca for sharing her experience and her extensive research and passion for this topic. There is no one else I felt right to do this episode with and I'm so glad we can share it with you. Rebecca, you've moved the needle for me, truly. A chapter in my future life that once filled me with dread, in some ways no longer does and that's with thanks to you. You are living testimony that though we live with this great pain, we can and will still be loving, doting, whole mothers. You are a beacon. References made in the episode:Rebecca's article interview: https://www.ealingtimes.co.uk/leisure/25166970.spirit-community-helped-ealing-new-mum-rebecca/How to refer/get support in the UK: https://www.england.nhs.uk/mental-health/perinatal/Hope Edelman - Motherless Mothers book. Rebecca has also privately set up a Motherless Mothers Whatsapp group chat. If you would like to join this group chat, please do get in contact with me via [email protected] or comment on the social media post for this episode and we will be in touch!Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the parenting without a parent series of the podcast! This topic has been one that has been widely requested throughout the years of GG and I'm finally getting round to it and can't be happier to have started this conversation with today's guest.For the first ep in this series, we're meeting Will Hunter Howell. Will is a bestselling author and the creator of The Pretty Painful Grief Book, a journal full of carefully crafted prompts to help you navigate your own grief journey. Having lost his Dad in a plane crash on his 3rd day at university, when he was just 19, this journal is the result of Will's own experiences with life after loss. An unapologetic space for you to stop pretending you're okay and start feeling it all—every raw, messy, f*cked-up emotion that comes with losing someone you love.Will shares with us in this episode what it was like for him to lose his dad at an incredibly young age and in incredibly tragic circumstances. Will walks us through his experience of becoming a Dad and the nuances it presented for him and still does. The question's we might ask ourself when it comes to our parenting styles - the styles we might pull on from our parents and the ones we leave behind. How we memorialise and tell our children about their ancestors and who they come from. Lastly, how we tend to our own grief whilst navigating becoming another human beings protector, provider and safe space. Will is so candid in this episode and I loved every minute of our chat, I hope you do too! Find and purchase Will's book via the links below:Book: Available on Amazon or linktr.ee/prettypainfulgriefbook Instagram @prettypainfulgriefbookTikTok @prettypainfulgriefbook***Please forgive the slight clicky noises throughout this ep. I tried my best to fix it but alas. It's the conversation that matters!***Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Grief Anon has made it's way to the pod! After some consideration, I've decided to bring Grief Anon from the Substack to the pod.This is the episode where you write in your griefy questions, queries or overall sharings and I do my best to give my two pence. In this weeks grief anon, here are the submission's we heard:"When does the totally being knackered by grief end?""I lost my partner a month ago and am so lonely. All I want is a partner for connection but feel so guilty. I don't know if dating now is too soon/selfish""How do you deal with changing relationships, i.e friends, family etc, with the loss of your person?"Some really nuanced and important submissions here and I really hope I did my best! As always, please give your support and additional opinion over on The Grief Gang socials. Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What happens when the loss of a parent in childhood leaves more questions than answers? In this episode, I'm chatting with Alvin Carpio, film maker and campaigner as we explore his journey to the Philippines in 2022 to retrace the life of his late father who died when Alvin was 9 years old.Through the lens of childhood bereavement, we follow Alvin in his film 'Rites' on his emotional pilgrimage to the country his father called home. Piecing together memory, his father's and his own identity and what continuing a bond with him now looks like. Alvin shares with us in this episode the layers, complexities and journey of what it is like to be a bereaved child and how that experience has shaped him throughout his life.About Alvin: Alvin Carpio is a campaigner and filmmaker. He is the founder of the School of Social Justice and director of rites, a short documentary film about childhood bereavement, grief, and healing. Born and raised in Newham, East London, Alvin’s work is currently focused on how people can face their demons in order to achieve liberation — drawing from his own journey of confronting grief to find freedom and purpose.Watch Rites:I really hope you enjoyed this episode and through Alvin's story have perhaps felt inspired to explore what storytelling is to you. To watch Rites for free on Youtube on Father's Day, follow the link below to register: https://schoolofsocialjustice.com/register-for-rites/As mentioned in the episode, it is now confirmed that the World Premiere of Rites will take place on Friday 13 June 2025 at a beautiful, state-of-the-art cinema at UCL East, One Pool Street Cinema, in Newham, East London. If you would like to attend, please email [email protected] with the subject like: “World Premiere”.Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to season 8 of The Grief Gang podcast! It feels really great to be back (even though I waffle on in the beginning saying how anxious I've been to return!)I wanted the first episode to be a Griefy Walks. You guys apparently love them and they feel like a voicenote from a friend, which I also love too. It's a bit of a catch up episode since last season with some sprinklings of chat around grief and spirituality, identity and speculation about who I could have been if grief hadn't punctuated my 20's. A very reflective episode as I approach my 28th birthday in the coming days.Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Christmas episode 2024! The episode where we hear from you, the listener. Thank you to everyone who wrote in or sent a voicenote for this special yearly episode. You make this episode magical!I am sending every one huge love and light as navigate this Christmas. Whether it's your first or tenth Christmas without your loved one, know that you are not alone. I hope this episode can really highlight that for you.Whatever you do today, I hope you can find a moment to stop, reflect and remember. Do what you need to get through, we've got this.Thank you all for a wonderful season 7 and 2024. This community means everything to me, thank you for letting me into your lives in so many ways. I'll see you in 2025 for season 8!Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm back for the second to last episode of season 7, and this one is a griefy walks. Where I basically just stomp around my town with my phone in my hand and see what on earth comes out. Expect rambles, birds tweeting and me coo'ing over cute doggies.But todays griefy walks has a main message. With Christmas one week away, I wanted to gently remind you that whether you're team f*** off Christmas or team embracing it, both are absolutely valid. Being all in or not doesn't quantify or equate anything, you're just doing what you need to do to get by. Listen to your heart and lean in to whatever it's asking. Whether that calling is to wrap yourself up in tinsel or the duvet.I'll see you all next week for the final ep, The Christmas episode!Big love,Amber xxxConnect with The Grief Gang community:Enquire about Grief Gang 1:1 and group circle mentoring hereBook onto a Grief Gang group circle hereInstagramTwitterFacebookYoutubeTikTokSubstackWebsiteIf this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. Share this episode with someone who might need to hear it today!Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/thegriefgang. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.