298: Loving the Fantasy of Someone

You probably know or have met someone with ADD, ADHD, or autism—or maybe you’re one of those people. These neurological differences, known as neurodivergence, make up an estimated 15-20% of the population. Whether or not you fall into this category, it’s likely to impact your life, and we’re here to help you navigate it. In this episode, Abi and Justin sit down with their friend and psychologist Ruth Outram. Together, they share their journeys with neurodivergence, the impact it’s had on their lives and relationships, and how they’ve turned what could have been kryptonite into a superpower. They also dive into the pros and cons of labels and explore how understanding their struggles has been empowering and liberating. Lastly, Abi drops a bombshell and briefly opens up about her autism diagnosis and how learning she was on the spectrum changed her life forever. If you want to better understand yourself or those around you, this episode is filled with insight and compassion. Don’t miss out! You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!

It’s easy to fall in love with the idea of someone. The fantasy we create in our minds is often one of very few imperfections. Unfortunately, the perfect person only exists in our imagination. Building a relationship around a fantasy cannot only be disappointing, but it can be incredibly destructive.  In this episode, Justin and Abi are joined by friend and fellow Life Consultant Rachel Hughes to discuss the world of relational fantasy known as limerence. They explore how fantasizing about who someone is can cause you to bond to the idea of them, create unrealistic expectations, perpetuate a one-sided relationship, and cause you to overlook their nuances altogether. They also delve into the importance of humanizing people and recognizing the red, yellow, and green flags we all have.  If you want to learn about a more holistic approach to relationships that will help you foster balance in the way you relate to others, this episode is right up your alley! AND REMEMBER TO CHECK US OUT ON YOUTUBE! You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!

In part two of this dialogue, Abi and Justin are once again joined by Habit Coach Jenna Zint to discuss the vital role boundaries play in fostering healthy relationships with yourself and others. Together, they tackle creative solutions for navigating seemingly powerless situations, eliminating blame and accusation in boundary setting, becoming self-aware of our patterns and triggers, and removing punishment from the process. They also explore how to create a balanced life through boundaries, avoiding the extremes of either giving nothing of ourselves or giving every last ounce to those who ask. This episode is packed with strategies that will bring relief to all your relationships. You won’t want to miss it!"   AND REMEMBER TO CHECK US OUT ON YOUTUBE! You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!

Boundaries has been a buzz word for a while now. As with any popularized emotional health tool, there have been wild misuses and misunderstandings of this deeply valuable concept. However, when used properly, boundaries can help create a thriving, connected life filled with love and respect for ourselves and others. In part one of this dialogue Justin and Abi sit down with Habit Coach Jenna Zint to discuss her strategic use of boundaries in her life. She opens up about how she gained confidence through a challenging learning curve with her mom. Together, they explore how to stop resenting people for having needs, how to say ‘No’ while still communicating value for someone, how to create balanced relationships, and how to healthily communicate feedback as a way to love and care for everyone involved.  If you’re needing clarity and courage around boundaries and want insight into how others approach them, this series will knock your socks off! AND REMEMBER TO CHECK US OUT ON YOUTUBE! You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!

Do you want to know a vital key to making your life better? It’s probably not what you think it is. Most of us believe that judging ourselves and others is a catalyst for change, but it’s quite the opposite. In fact, judgment can be the most damning opponent to experiencing a fulfilled life. But it doesn’t have to be that way. In this episode Justin and Abi are joined once again by their good friend Gabby to discuss compassion and its role in healing, growth, and enjoying life. They talk about the impact of the judgment stick we use, the shame highs and shame lows that keep us from feeling loved, and the common humanity that we all share. Lastly, they examine the destructive belief that if people have compassion for themselves, they’ll live stagnant and passively towards life. If you could use a fresh and hopeful perspective on how to approach life, this episode is just for you. Oh and it’s funny…so you’ll get a good laugh as well. ;)   AND REMEMBER TO CHECK US OUT ON YOUTUBE!   You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife   Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!

Nobody that’s been married will deny that it’s difficult. When we get together with another person, we’re faced with communication breakdowns, different cultural backgrounds, opposing value systems, and worst of all, having a mirror that shows us the messiness of our own heart. Though it’s tough, with a few keys, it can be a liberating experience for both parties.   In this episode, long time friends Pietze and Johnny join Justin and Abi to discuss the ways taking personal ownership has been a game changer in their relationships. They talk about the hurdles they’ve had to overcome in order to be honest with themselves and each other and they open up vulnerably about the ways they’ve hurt one another.   If you’re needing some perspective on how to win at marriage or could use some hope on how to navigate the choppy waters of any relationship, this episode is perfect for you.   AND REMEMBER TO CHECK US OUT ON YOUTUBE!   You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife   Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!

We all impact the world around us for better and for worse. It can feel difficult to take an honest look at ourselves and how we affect others, but what if self-reflection is the stepping stone to having the best experience of this life? In this episode, Justin and Abi discuss the reality of having to look at ourselves honestly. They explore the positive benefits this has on developing deeper connections, a heart of humility, and an abundant life experience. They also ponder how this might play out in eternity while discussing how our choices here might affect us there. If you want to get inspired about the life right in front of you, this episode does just  that!  AND REMEMBER TO CHECK US OUT ON YOUTUBE! You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!  

Conflict isn’t fun for most of us. For many of us, we’d rather avoid it altogether. Since many of us haven’t seen it modeled well, it can often lead to further disruptions in relationships and seemingly make things worse. But what if we had a better understanding of its benefits and how to do it well? In this episode Gabby, a good friend of Abi and Justin, joins the conversation. Gabby shares about her journey of avoiding conflict, the impact it had on her life, and the brave tweaks she made in her beliefs and actions that changed the game for her altogether. If you want insight on why you react to conflict the way you do, and could use some inspiration on how to navigate conflict moving forward, this episode is chock full of insight, and entertaining laughs that will help the medicine go down! AND REMEMBER TO CHECK US OUT ON YOUTUBE! You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!

Whether or not we’re aware of it, we all have emotions we don’t want to feel. Some of those emotions are so intolerable that we’ll do anything we can to avoid them. Unfortunately, avoiding these emotions won’t resolve them. It simply perpetuates them. But don’t fear, there’s hope to face them! In this episode, Justin and Abi are joined by their friend Ruth Outram, who is currently finishing her doctorate in Clinical Psychology. Together, they discuss the intolerable emotions we all have, where they come from, and how we can learn to approach even the most difficult feelings. If you want a better understanding of the feelings and reactions you’re having, this episode is filled with gold! AND REMEMBER TO CHECK US OUT ON YOUTUBE! You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!  

In today’s culture, masculinity has two predominant expressions on opposite ends of the spectrum. One expression is the dominant protector that views emotional health as weak. On the other end is the nonthreatening connector that avoids challenges at all costs. But what if there was an expression of masculinity that was a healthy blend of protector and connector? In this episode, Justin sits down with special guest Jeremy Morris, founder of Wild Courage. Jeremy shares stories of fostering a tribe of men who have found the courage to face their fears of vulnerability while maintaining their capacity to face adversity head-on. If you’ve been looking for an example of a balanced model of masculinity that is connected to its heart and willing to face any fight on behalf of those it loves, this episode is a MUST! Don’t miss out. AND REMEMBER TO CHECK US OUT ON YOUTUBE! You can WATCH us at https://www.justinandabi.com/theconnectedlife Don’t forget to RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE, AND SHARE!