207 – How One Bullsh*t Comment Freed A Young Man From A Cult & The Extreme Response From Family

Today we meet Jake, a 26-year-old former Jehovah’s Witness. Jake discusses his upbringing in the religion, being a fourth-generation member on his mother’s side and third-generation on his father’s side, and the pressure to conform. He shares his experiences with a limited worldview, internal conflict about “worldly” people, and the impact of his father’s alcoholism and abuse on his family life, leading to his own depression. The conversation covers his eventual “waking up” to the organization’s flaws, the realization and acceptance of his identity as a gay man, and the subsequent shunning by his family and the organization. Finally, Jake talks about his journey of healing, self-discovery, and pursuit of education and future political aspirations after leaving the cult of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel

In this episode you’ll meet Vicki as she shares her deeply personal experiences growing up as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses and the profound impact it had on her life. Vicki recounts how her mother’s fervent dedication to the faith led to Vicki’s childhood being manipulated and controlled, including being hidden from her biological father and enduring physical and sexual abuse within the home, which was covered up by the organization. The narrative highlights the damaging effects of shunning and the difficult journey of deprogramming and finding her own path to healing, eventually leading to a reconciliation with her father and the creation of her own supportive “chosen family.” Vicki’s story provides a raw and deeply personal account of growing up within the Jehovah’s Witness organization, experiencing severe abuse, and the long, difficult path to recovery and self-discovery. Her narrative highlights the profound impact of cult involvement on individuals and families, particularly concerning child custody, abuse cover-ups, and the psychological effects of shunning and indoctrination. Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. The song that Vicki chose to represent her story is Bad For Me by Meghan Trainor and Teddy Swims You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel

In this episode Dennise recounts her upbringing with a strong-willed mother who rigorously enforced cult doctrines, leading to a childhood filled with anxiety, emotional, and physical abuse. She details her early disbelief in the dogma, her forced baptism and pioneering, and the isolating effects of her family’s strict adherence. She also explores her disfellowshipping after seeking freedom in another state, a subsequent brain tumor during pregnancy, and her parents’ attempt to deny her life-saving blood transfusions due to religious beliefs. Ultimately, Dennise shares her journey to healing and finding happiness after leaving Jehovah’s Witnesses and relocating, highlighting the lasting psychological impacts but also the joy of authenticity and forming healthy relationships. Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel

This episode explores Dianna’s life, starting with her family’s unconventional path into the faith, with her grandmother and later her mother and siblings becoming baptized, though her parents initially struggled with aspects like smoking. Dianna describes her own baptism at age 15, feeling it was the expected next step rather than a deep connection. She discusses her social life, including friendships within the Kingdom Hall and at public school, and her experience with pioneering. The interview details her marriage to a fellow Witness, his appointment as an elder, and the eventual downfall of their marriage due to his inappropriate relationship with another woman in the congregation, culminating in a tragic event involving the other woman’s husband. Finally, Dianna reflects on being disfellowshipped, reinstated, and ultimately drifting away, finding freedom and joy in her life outside the organization, particularly through motherhood and embracing her open-mindedness. Dianna’s story is a compelling account of the impact of a high-control religious environment on an individual’s life. It highlights the themes of familial and social pressure, the superficiality of relationships within the organization, the detrimental effects of judgmentalism and control, and the challenges and joys of breaking free and finding personal identity and genuine connection in the outside world. Her experiences with shunning, the tragic events surrounding her divorce, and her journey of waking up and embracing a more open-minded and accepting perspective provide valuable insights into the realities of leaving a cult. Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel

This episode is an interview with Alex, formerly one of Jehovah’s Witnesses, who shares his deeply personal experience of being raised in the organization and the profound impact it had on his life. He details his family’s multi-generational involvement, highlighting the emphasis on being “God’s chosen people” and the resulting feelings of being “special” yet also judgmental and isolated from the “worldly” people outside due to the black and white thinking and discouragement of those outside relationships. The core of his story revolves around his struggle to reconcile his inner desires and the forced external appearance of a loyal Witness, ultimately leading to being “shunned” after a seemingly minor infraction, a traumatic event that triggered severe depression, alcoholism, and a long period of self-destructive behavior, before finding a path toward self-discovery, genuine connection, and challenging the destructive beliefs he was raised with. Alex’s story provides a powerful and deeply personal account of the profound and lasting impact of growing up in and eventually leaving the Jehovah’s Witness organization. It highlights the psychological toll of strict doctrines, manipulative practices, and the trauma of shunning. His journey underscores the difficulty of navigating the outside world without the necessary social and emotional tools and the importance of self-discovery and building authentic connections in the healing process. The inclusion of a song reflecting on his relationship with his father adds a poignant layer to the narrative, emphasizing the enduring pain and complex emotions associated with familial separation due to religious beliefs. Alex’s story is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the possibility of finding happiness and purpose after leaving a high-control religious group. The song featured at the end is “Sometimes Your Best Still Hurts” by Mrs. London’s Butler and the song and his channel can be found on YouTube at: https://youtu.be/iq_RoSyYoig?si=1XDKPNrRT9eIcw9C Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel

This episode provides a powerful and heartbreaking account of growing up within the restrictive and often damaging environment of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Carol Anne’s story highlights the immense pressure of maintaining a generational heritage, the severe consequences of shunning, and the prevalence of abuse and trauma within families intertwined with the organization. The organization’s handling of serious issues like grooming and molestation, often prioritizing internal control over reporting to authorities, is a significant point of concern. Carol Anne’s experience of living a double life, suppressing her identity, and the limited social and educational opportunities are clear consequences of the JW lifestyle. Despite the profound challenges and betrayals she faced, particularly from her family, Carol Anne’s journey towards deconstruction, healing, and building healthy relationships offers a hopeful conclusion, emphasizing the possibility of breaking negative cycles and finding genuine happiness outside of the organization. The narrative serves as a poignant reminder of the human cost of authoritarian religious control and the importance of individual agency and self-acceptance. Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. The song that Johanna chose to represent her journey is Surface Pressure from Encanto. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel

Johanna was raised as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Her story encompasses a childhood marked by secret abuse, a home environment with a dangerous and alcoholic father, and what could be considered a shocking and early marriage, ultimately leading to her being shunned by the Jehovah’s Witnesses. • Secret Abuse: Johanna was molested by an older cousin for about a year and a half when she was around 8 or 9 years old. This was kept a family secret, and she was told not to tell anyone, not even her father. Her mother, upon finding out, questioned Johanna in a blaming way, asking “Why did you let him do that to you?”. This incident highlights a significant secret abuse that Johanna endured without adequate support or protection from her family. • A Dangerous Dad: Johanna’s father is described as an alcoholic who became increasingly violent as she got older. There were instances where he would smash things, break into the house after being locked out, and Johanna would overhear him threatening to kill the entire family. The family would sometimes leave for short periods due to his violence, but were discouraged from permanently leaving by elders in the congregation. Ultimately, her father died by suicide using a homemade gun, and Johanna believed his plan involved killing the entire family as he had six bullets for six family members. This paints a picture of a dangerous father who created a volatile and fear-filled home environment. • A Shocking Marriage: Johanna got engaged at 15 or 16 and married at 17 to a 22-year-old fellow Jehovah’s Witness. This occurred partly as an escape from her difficult home life, as her mother and stepfather did not want her there. The circumstances surrounding the engagement, where her mother suggested marriage as a solution to them being forbidden to talk, and the young age of Johanna, particularly within a non-Witness context, could be considered shocking. Johanna herself acknowledges her naivety about relationships due to her sheltered upbringing. • But Johanna is shunned by Jehovah’s Witnesses. Today she shares her story for herself and for her son that was featured on a previous episode. Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. The song that Johanna chose to represent her journey is Surface Pressure from Encanto. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel

It’s been almost 8 years, a whole lot of work, and here we are sitting at episode 200 of the Shunned Podcast. Episode 100 featured 100 things you need to know to heal from Jehovah’s Witnesses, and this episode will feature a lot of ways that the cult may have impacted you that you never thought about. If you watch or listen to this episode, I’ll be surprised if you don’t walk away with something to think about, if not many things, for your own life. We’re going to talk about how we relate to others as we navigate a post JW world but we’ll also discuss how we relate to Jehovah’s Witnesses. Then we’re going to talk about our relationship with self, and drop a lot of points for consideration. After that we’ll talk about the teachings and culture of Jehovah’s Witnesses and some of the more directly related impacts of their beliefs. And some might enjoy a bonus episode of my views that are often a bit unconventional on things like Norway, the ExJW community as a whole, violence and Jehovah’s Witnesses, and maybe a little interview of myself as well if they want. I’m a cult recovery coach with my own lived experience as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses and I’ve worked with hundreds and hundreds of individuals since 2019, often working with roughly 6 individuals daily in hour long sessions, diving into people’s lives, helping them to heal and move forward into a life that is reflective of who they are and who they want to be. I also have three podcasts, This JW Life which is my story told in such a way as to help others process their own. We translated that into Spanish to help in that community where it’s known as Esta Vida Como Testigo De Jehovah. And This JW Life was also turned into a book called Becoming Jehovah, which is available to read for free online, links to everything mentioned here will be in the podcast or YouTube description. Today I’m the host of the Shunned Podcast where I help other people to tell their stories their way, which I’ve been doing since 2017 as one of the OG podcasters still out here doing their thing. My channels have been viewed, listened to, downloaded over 1.5 million times at this recording. I have also developed an ExJW cart to take out to do street activism, and last year I went out to do a one man audio protest at a regional convention. I’ve also been privileged to speak at the University of Louisville in a psychology class, at the inaugural When Rights and Religions Collide conference, and I’ve done online and in person speaking for the International Cultic Studies Association. Oh, and I created fun trivia quiz website that I’ve been able to get active Jehovah’s Witnesses to interact with at JWTrivia.com that is in three languages and that introduces active Jws to new concepts if they take the simple quiz. I even ran a private Facebook group of ExJWs with a couple thousand members that was aimed at positivity and moving forward for a few years, and I’ve always been active in various Facebook groups and subreddits to try to offer a word of support or encouragement since I left Jehovah’s Witneses in 2015. In fact, we’re coming up on my 10th Shunniversary this September. So when you listen to what I’m about to break down, these are my observations and lessons that you can take away from my experience in this community. Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel

Life for Chelynn didn’t exactly get off to an auspicious start when her parents were marked as bad association in the congregation of Jehovah’s Witnesses as they had her. While is is hard enough to grow up exposed to a cult, further losses only compounded the tough path that she would have to walk. Facing the loss of more than one man that she loved, and addiction to various substances beginning with meth in high school, Chelynn has had to fight for everything that she’s had. Today she fights, not just for herself, but for her little boy as well. The prize? A happy life for herself, a loving environment for her little boy, and to give him things that she never had. Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel

It’s hard enough growing up different than everyone else because your family is in the cult of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Everyone wants to fit in, to belong, to feel seen and heard and validated. But what if you individually were singled out in the very isolated cult environment at the ripe age of 12 because of rumors started by children and carried out by adults? What if everyone labeled you as though you were demonized in some way over silly childhood games? What if you did the one thing that you thought you could do to get them to see you differently, and it didn’t work? This is the story of Alex. Support the show and get bonuses as well by donating to the cause on our Patreon page, Patreon.com/shunned Are you struggling in some area of life? Feeling stuck? Need an accountability partner or some encouragement? Need to talk to someone that understands cult life? Reach out and let’s talk. I have affordable programs to help as a certified life coach with a focus on cult recovery. Click HERE for more information. Want more resources? Go to my other website exjwHelp.com Leave us a review on iTunes Find shunned podcast on Youtube, including new VIDcasts here. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram. You can listen to the Shunned Podcast Spotify playlist here for all of the songs chosen by guests of the show. This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment. Read my FREE online book, based on This JW Life, called Becoming Jehovah, in both English and Spanish by clicking here An ExJW podcast and ExJW YouTube Channel