EP7. Surviving Domestic Abuse with Karen Messina McDonnell

Jess Ramsey, MAT, CPC, ELI-MP, is the President & Founder of Jess Ramsey Coaching. As a learning facilitator and relationship coach, she helps couples get out of Stucksville and reclaim the joy-filled, passionate relationships they thought they were getting when they said, “I do.” She knows that juggling full professional lives, children, and other adult responsibilities can sandbag relationships, but she also believes that it doesn’t have to. She helps people see how to make their partnerships a source of joy again by teaching them research-based strategies to strengthen their emotional connections and reduce unresolved conflict. Spending nearly 20 years as an educator and professional coach, Jess has extensive experience empowering people to grow into the versions of themselves they most want to become. She earned her coaching certification from one of the highest-ranked programs in the world (iPEC), and she’s spent years studying what works in relationships from experts in the field (Drs. John Gottman, Brene Brown, Gary Chapman, and Harriet Lerner). When not coaching or teaching, you might find Jess walking in the woods with her surly Australian Shepherd puppy or painting rocks with her partner, Jason, and his precocious six-year-old daughter. To learn more about Jess Ramsey Coaching and Jess, please visit: jessramsey-coaching.com  

Hello everyone. I hope you are all doing very well. Last week I interviewed Domestic Abuse Coach Karen Messina McDonnell, who works with survivors of abuse. If you haven’t listened to the interview, I strongly suggest you listen to it before today’s episode, as it will give you a better understanding of what it is like to be in an abusive relationship and the lasting effects it can have on people. Karen mentioned that when she was being abused by her husband, it was the intervention and support of a friend that helped her change her circumstances, leave her abusive husband, and transform her life. But we don’t all have friends who live next door, who can see into our homes or hear our fights and who can offer us the help we need right then and there. Some of us might rely on people a fit further from us, a good-hearted colleague, a boss, a teacher, a friend…to be that person who notices and offers us support. So if you are one such person, if you are worried that someone you know might be in an abusive situation at home, I want to share with you some tips on changes to keep an eye out for, so that you can offer them your support. Also, if you are going through abuse right now, or if you are living with the effects of a past abusive relationship and are looking for support but don’t know who to turn to, do not hesitate to contact me via email at [email protected], or to reach out on FB & Instagram @barbararubiocoach 

Today I bring you an interview with the lovely Karen Messina McDonnell, a Certified Life and Survivors of Abuse Coach helping Professional Women Survivors OWN their POWER. She is also the host of the amazing and really helpful “Coaching Survivors of Domestic Abuse’ podcast. Karen is herself a survivor of domestic abuse, which is how she was able to connect with, advocate for, and help women going through abuse for over 20 years while working as a paralegal in court. She later decided to shift the focus of her work from the victims to the survivors, helping women who are STILL suffering from the emotional trauma that domestic abuse caused them. Karen lives and works in New York but, through her online coaching practice, she helps professional women around the world to heal their trauma by discovering and owning their power. Not only is she super qualified and experienced but she is also a lovely, lovely woman and I am really excited to have her on the podcast with us today. https://www.karenmessina.com/ (website) https://anchor.fm/karen-messina  (podcast)

Our guest today is Mike Staunton, International Personal Financial Coach, CEO and Founder of Money Like Mike. Mike is originally from North Carolina, though he currently lives in Melbourne Australia. His mission is to teach others how to take control of their money, something he had to learn the hard way through mistakes that cost him a lot of time and money! So much so that when he was in his early 20s, he had $100,000 in debt and NOTHING to show for it! Now in his 30s, he has been able to create the financial freedom that he once dreamt of and that consists of traveling, bike riding, leaving the 9-5 rat race, serving others through his coaching and volunteering at places that are close to his heart. In today’s conversation Mike and I talk about the role of money in relationships and we discuss some healthy financial practices that might just save your relationship from breakup! You can contact Mike  on his website: https://www.moneylikemike.com/   on FB: https://www.facebook.com/mikestaunton.moneylikemike and on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/money.like.mike/

In this episode, I bring you the very talented and inspiring Dr. Pernilla Nathan. Pernilla is both a Doctor in Psychology specializing in trauma and cultural diversity issues AND a bad-ass entrepreneur creator of the gorgeous ELLA SKYE computer accessories brand for female professionals. She has found a way to build two thriving businesses that focus on quality, performance and inclusivity.  In this conversation we talk about building two very different businesses, developing human relationships and the power of tuning into and integrating our GUT and Logical brains for the benefit of business and personal relationships.  https://loveellaskye.com/ https://www.drpernillanathan.com/

In today’s episode we have Enara Iribar. Enara is an Ambassador and Consul at Internations, an online networking platform that connects expats everywhere in the world with local people, events, employment opportunities, and now even dates! Enara’s background in business management and her love of international environments has helped her become one of the key leaders in the Internation’s online events community. She currently organises the very popular Online Speed Dating events, which are attended by people all around the world. These events are a great opportunity to have fun, date in the times of COVID and maybe, even find a special someone!! If you want to know more about Enara or about Internations you can find her on the links below: LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/enarairibar Internations: www.internations.org

Today I share a conversation with my husband, Kennedy Okonkwo, which was aired on his podcast 'The Answer' earlier this year. In this conversation, we discuss how we go about arguing, the lessons we have learnt through past experiences and the 6 Step approach we use when we are triggered to ensure we can deal with our issues and resolve them in the most positive and mature way.  If you are in a relationship and find that: -  you fight/argue a lot - you never resolve your conflict - issues keep piling up  - there doesn't seem to be a way forward in the relationship... ...then maybe our 6 step approach to conscious arguing, or your own modified version of it could be the solution! Listen to the full episode and leave a comment + review if you found it useful! :-) Follow 'The Answer Podcast' with Kennedy Okonkwo here: https://open.spotify.com/show/0UzDd0uItLnVXrXGWMKi7Q  

Today we have Dee Shepherd with us. Dee’s story is both a unique and inspiring tale of how it is possible to overcome adversity by developing and committing to a conscious relationship with ourselves and tapping into the power that facilitates transformation within. 2 years ago, at age 45, Dee was given 5 years to live. Having been wheelchair-bound for about 10 years and suffered from myriad ailments, she was confronted with a hard choice: to give up and accept the death sentence OR the much harder decision to fight against all odds and find a way to heal. Her strong will and determination to improve her health condition stunned her doctors, as she began to recover, walk and even workout without the need for medication. This is how she earned the nicknames of ‘Super Dee’ or ‘Miracle Dee’. Today she has fully recovered from all the conditions that affected her for so long AND works to help other women tap into their inner power to transform their lives too. https://www.deevineshepherd.guru/

Today I'm sharing the story of how Barbie met Ken, or how I met my husband! It took an abusive relationship, acknowledging some mental health issues it had created (anxiety, paranoia, insecurity), and healing the trauma, for me to finally find the winning formula. This formula is what I now teach in my coaching practice as 'My Lifecode for Relationships'.  I hope you enjoy the whole story and learning how both Kennedy's and my journey aligned to finally recognise each other and build the conscious relationship that we enjoy today.