Ep 114 The Emotional Shift from Fertility Patient to Parent

In this solo episode of Fertility Café, host Eloise Drane breaks down one of the most buzzed-about topics in modern fertility: egg freezing. Once considered a niche medical intervention, egg freezing has become a mainstream option for those seeking to preserve their fertility, but what does it really involve? Eloise takes you through the entire landscape, from the medical process and emotional considerations to the financial realities and cultural shifts. She unpacks how egg freezing evolved from a last-resort treatment to a proactive choice, what it actually looks like to go through a cycle, and why access remains unequal despite growing interest. This episode is for anyone who’s ever wondered: “Is egg freezing right for me?” “What’s the real cost, and not just financially?” “How does this intersect with identity, access, and equity?” Whether you're exploring your options or simply trying to understand the conversation more deeply, this episode offers real talk, grounded insights, and the kind of honesty that Fertility Café is known for. Mentioned Resources: American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM.org) FertilityIQ.com Tune in for a thoughtful guide through the myths, facts, and nuances of egg freezing, because your timeline, your body, and your decisions deserve clarity and care.

What happens when every path to parenthood seems to close? For Erica Ferraro, the answer was egg donation—a deeply emotional and empowering decision shaped by a long, painful battle with undiagnosed endometriosis. In this powerful episode, Erica joins host Eloise Drane to share the real story behind her journey: the years of misdiagnosis, the trauma of IVF failure, and the healing that came from choosing donor conception. You’ll hear: -What it’s really like to receive an endometriosis diagnosis after two decades -Why Erica believes egg donation is a form of organ donation—and not “less than” -Honest insights on grieving genetic loss, finding the right donor, and parenting after donor IVF -How her new book, Moving Mountains for Motherhood, became the U.S.'s first professionally published infertility survival guide Whether you’re navigating your own fertility journey or supporting someone who is, this episode is a raw, real, and hopeful reminder that love—not biology—defines family. Moving Mountains for Motherhood is available now on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and more. Connect with Erica on Instagram @eri.ferraro Don’t forget to subscribe, like, and share this episode to support more honest conversations about modern family building. #FertilityCafe #EggDonation #EndometriosisAwareness #DonorIVF #InfertilitySupport #ModernParenthood Chapters (00:00:00) - Fertility Cafe(00:00:58) - Egg Donor: Moving Mountains for Motherhood(00:02:04) - I Got A Mother's Endometriosis Diagnosis(00:07:27) - The Secret to Managing Endometriosis in Your 20s(00:11:26) - Egg Donation After IVF(00:16:05) - Donor Eggs For Couple's Baby(00:21:47) - The Donor Selection in My Egg IVF(00:23:55) - The Decision Between Anonymity & Open ID(00:28:32) - Janet on Frozen Eggs vs. Fresh IVF(00:35:15) - Why I Don't Share My Egg Donor Story(00:41:06) - The Journey to Parenthood: Third-Party Reproduction(00:42:20) - The Book Moving Mountains For Motherhood(00:46:58) - E egg donation in the United States(00:50:16) - Where Can People Get A Copy of Moving Mountains For Motherhood?

In this heartfelt episode, Ashley Hengston opens up about her deeply personal path from infertility to motherhood through surrogacy. She shares the emotional highs and lows—from the grief of infertility to the complex decisions involved in choosing surrogacy. Ashley walks us through the process of matching with a surrogate, navigating medical and legal steps, and managing the emotional terrain of pregnancy and birth. This conversation sheds light on the importance of trust, preparation, and communication in the surrogacy journey. Ashley candidly discusses the emotional impact of the birth, her experience with postpartum depression, and how intended parents can stay connected throughout the process. She also shares the value of community and support groups for those navigating the often isolating road of infertility. Whether you’re considering surrogacy or supporting someone who is, this episode offers raw insight and real encouragement.   Have questions about your surrogacy journey? Speak with our expert team today: https://familyinceptions.com/intended-parents/ Stay Connected Instagram: @fertilitycafe Facebook: @fertilitycafe Website: https://thefertilitycafe.com More Resources Learn more about surrogacy & fertility: https://familyinceptions.com/ All information shared is for educational purposes and subject to change. Always consult with a medical or legal professional for personalized advice.   Chapters (00:00:00) - Fertility Cafe(00:01:09) - Ashley Hingston on Becoming a Parent Through Surrog(00:02:10) - Ashley Hingstown on Her Infertility(00:02:59) - The Process of Introspective surrogacy(00:05:53) - The Parents Who Used Surrogacy(00:08:12) - The Joy of Surrogacy(00:10:54) - When Did You Choose To Use an Agency or Go Independent?(00:11:59) - A Couple's Matching Experience(00:14:28) - The Family Blueprint(00:15:41) - The Surrogate's First Meet the Parents(00:18:25) - The Secret to Getting A Mother's Love(00:21:19) - The Secret to Surrogacy(00:22:37) - After Having a Surrogate Baby,(00:25:03) - The Surrogate's Relationship With Her Partner(00:32:54) - The Day My Surrogate Was Born(00:35:51) - The Surrogate's Postpartum Depression(00:43:28) - "I'm Not In Love With My Parenting"(00:44:32) - In the Elevator With Infertility Support Group(00:45:40) - Pregnant Woman on Her Journey(00:46:56) - Ashley on Rage Against Infertility(00:48:11) - Surrogacy 101

Why are ambitious women waiting too long to think about fertility preservation, and what's the real cost?Host Eloise Drane welcomes Dr. Suzanna Chatterjee-Morris, a dual board-certified physician in OB-GYN and obesity medicine who brings both clinical expertise and deeply personal experience to today's conversation. Dr. Chatterjee-Morris has navigated her own challenging fertility journey, including multiple egg retrievals, donor eggs, and preparing for surrogacy while maintaining a demanding medical practice. Her unique perspective as both physician and patient offers invaluable insights for women balancing high-pressure careers with family planning decisions and fertility preservation choices. This episode explores the complex reality of fertility treatment for ambitious women in leadership roles, covering egg-freezing decisions, the challenges of coordinating IVF cycles with demanding schedules and navigating fertility clinic experiences. Discussion includes the importance of early fertility preservation, advocating for yourself in medical settings, weight-related barriers in fertility treatment, and the emotional journey of third-party reproduction. Dr. Chatterjee-Morris shares practical advice about choosing fertility clinics, understanding BMI requirements, and making informed decisions about donor eggs and gestational carriers while managing autoimmune conditions. In This Episode:  (00:00) Dr. Chatterjee-Morris shares her complete fertility journey from residency decision to current surrogacy plans (08:40) The difficult transition from own eggs to donor eggs to gestational carrier due to multiple sclerosis (14:32) Balancing seven IVF cycles with demanding medical practice and patient care (20:33) Experiencing dismissive treatment and unprofessional care at fertility clinics (27:12) The critical importance of egg freezing in your twenties for career-focused women (32:34) Recognizing endometriosis symptoms early and advocating for reproductive health education (39:44) Navigating weight stigma and BMI requirements in fertility treatment with compassion (46:25) Final advice on self-advocacy and making the best decisions for your fertility journey Share with someone who may be interested, like and subscribe to hear all of our future episodes! Resources:Instagram/TikTok: @healthyobgyn Website: rivervalleyobgyn.com   Book a Free Consultation Have questions about becoming a surrogate? Learn more: https://familyinceptions.com/surrogates/ Curious about how much you could make with surrogacy? Use our Compensation Calculator: https://familyinceptions.com/s...

What would you do if a Google search from your hospital bed revealed your only path to motherhood was illegal in your state?Today Eloise welcomes Stephanie Jones, founder of the Michigan Fertility Alliance and 2024 RESOLVE Hope Award recipient for advocacy. After facing life-threatening pregnancy complications that ended her ability to carry a pregnancy, Stephanie discovered through a Google search from her hospital recovery bed that Michigan banned surrogacy contracts—her only option to grow her family. She leveraged her business expertise as an engineer and company VP to transform this personal crisis into legislative change. The conversation explores Stephanie's journey from secondary infertility through building the Michigan Fertility Alliance from scratch during the pandemic, culminating in the passage of the Michigan Family Protection Act in 2024. Listeners will gain insights into Michigan's surprising surrogacy history, the complexities of having a surrogate birth in another state during COVID, and how the nine-bill package revolutionized fertility and parentage laws for all Michigan families. In This Episode:  (00:00) Introduction to Michigan's restrictive surrogacy laws and transformation (03:01) Stephanie Jones's background and secondary infertility journey (08:46) The Google search that started it all from hospital recovery bed (12:39) Michigan's surprising surrogacy history from first to banned (18:37) Building advocacy during the pandemic while having daughter via surrogate (20:50) The complicated experience of surrogacy birth in Kentucky during COVID (26:17) Overcoming challenges to get people to care about fertility issues (31:53) Balancing business executive role with intensive advocacy work (34:29) Breaking down the nine-bill Michigan Family Protection Act (38:21) Introduction to State Strong national coalition for advocacy (41:29) The urgent need for fertility advocates to act nowShare with someone who may be interested, like and subscribe to hear all of our future episodes! Resources:Michigan Fertility Alliance: www.michiganfertilityalliance.org State Strong Coalition: www.statestrong.org Michigan Family Protection Act Information: www.michigan.gov/familyprotectionact Stephanie Jones Email: [email protected] RESOLVE National Infertility Association: www.resolve.org

Eloise Drane, host of Fertility Café and a seasoned fertility industry expert with over two decades of experience, explores the emotional transition from fertility treatments to parenthood in this insightful episode. Drawing from personal experience and professional knowledge, Eloise addresses the complex emotions that arise when the focus shifts from trying to conceive to actually becoming a parent. The episode delves into letting go of the infertility mindset, releasing control, identity shifts after fertility journeys, and the realities of early parenthood after treatments. Eloise offers compassionate guidance for navigating feelings of uncertainty, addressing anxieties, building bonds with your baby, and embracing the messy, beautiful process of becoming a parent—however you arrived there. In This Episode:  (00:00) Introduction to the mental shift from fertility treatments to parenthood (04:32) Letting go of the infertility mindset and processing mixed emotions (09:45) Releasing control and learning to trust your parenting instincts (15:20) Reclaiming identity after the fertility journey ends (20:48) Sponsor: The Family Blueprint event in Atlanta (22:17) What no one tells you about early parenthood after infertility (28:03) When bonding doesn't feel instant: normalizing gradual connections (31:45) How relationships and friendships transform after becoming a parent (36:30) Embracing the growth process of parenthood after fertility strugglesShare with someone who may be interested, like and subscribe to hear all of our future episodes! Resources: Book a Free Consultation Have questions about becoming a surrogate? Learn more: https://familyinceptions.com/surrogates/ Curious about how much you could make with surrogacy? Use our Compensation Calculator: https://familyinceptions.com/surrogacy-compensation-calculator/ Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fertilitycafe Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/fertilitycafe LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/fertility-cafe/ Website: https://thefertilitycafe.com More Resources Learn more about surrogacy & fertility:

What if freezing your eggs as a college graduation gift could be the most important investment in your future family? - Dr. Susanna Park Dr. Susanna Park, a fertility specialist from San Diego Fertility Center, joins host Eloise Drane to share her expertise on fertility testing. Board-certified in both obstetrics/gynecology and reproductive endocrinology, Dr. Park brings a global perspective shaped by her journey from South Korea to Argentina to the United States. With five-time recognition as a top fertility doctor by San Diego Magazine, she offers invaluable insights on proactive fertility assessment. This episode explores the critical timing of fertility testing, examining why women shouldn't wait for obvious signs before understanding their reproductive health. Dr. Park breaks down key fertility tests for both women and men, optimal ages to start testing, how to interpret results, and the various treatment options available when challenges arise. Listeners will gain practical knowledge on taking control of their fertility journey before problems develop. Dr. Susanna Park is a renowned fertility specialist from the San Diego Fertility Center. Dr. Park is double board-certified in Obstetrics and Gynecology, and Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility. She brings a unique global perspective to fertility care, with an impressive background that spans from Seoul to Buenos Aires to New York City, and now San Diego. She's been recognized as a "Top Fertility Doctor" by San Diego Magazine five times, most recently in 2023.   In This Episode:    (00:00) Eloise introduces the importance of proactive fertility testing (01:35) Dr. Park shares her journey to specializing in fertility medicine (02:53) Dr. Park's international background and global perspective on fertility care (06:51) At what age should people start considering fertility testing (09:54) Understanding key fertility tests and normal ranges for women (15:11) How age impacts fertility for both men and women (21:13) What constitutes a normal menstrual cycle and warning signs (26:11) Four essential components needed for natural conception (29:38) Best approaches for timing intercourse when trying to conceive (33:26) Understanding natural cycle treatments versus medicated approaches (38:34) The IVF process explained for women and egg donors (45:55) Testing approaches for same-sex couples planning families (51:28) How technology advancements have transformed fertility treatments Share with someone who may be interested, like and subscribe to hear all of our future episodes! Resources:

“It's viably gonna be one of the most intimate journeys you'll ever be on, just like your marriage, your relationship with your children. It's this infinite entanglement between you and them…” - April Whitford Today on The Fertility Cafe, host Eloise Drane is joined by April Whitford, Journey Manager at Family Inceptions with a decade of experience at the company and 25 years in family building. April, who holds an LMSW from Florida State University, shares her extensive knowledge of guiding hundreds of surrogates through their journeys, emphasizing the importance of patience in what she describes as an 18-month marathon rather than a sprint. The episode breaks down the practical aspects of surrogacy, from initial screening and matching to medical protocols and travel expectations. They discuss the comprehensive support surrogates receive, the importance of having family and employer backing, insurance considerations, and the legal process of establishing parentage. April and Eloise provide valuable insights into the logistical realities of surrogacy, including medication schedules, appointment frequency, and hospital birth plans. April Whitford, Journey Manager for Family Inceptions. April has been in the family-building space since 2000, and her passion for helping others shows in every interaction. She's committed to providing the highest level of support to surrogates and intended parents, ensuring that every journey is handled with care and compassion. With over two decades of experience, April has guided hundreds of surrogates through every step of their journeys and has invaluable insights to share about the logistical realities of surrogacy.   In This Episode:  (00:00) Importance of understanding surrogate logistics (04:18) April explains why surrogacy is a marathon requiring patience, not a sprint (05:37) The detailed screening and matching process for surrogates (11:06) Timeline expectations from match to embryo transfer (12:59) Travel logistics and arrangements during the surrogate journey (16:04) Understanding medication protocols and appointment schedules (19:33) Building a strong support system throughout your surrogate journey (24:06) Preparing family, children, and employers for your surrogacy process (31:26) Insurance coverage and protective policies for surrogates (34:08) Birth plans and hospital preparation for surrogate deliveries Share with someone who may be interested, like and subscribe to hear all of our future episodes!   Resources:April Whitford LinkedIn Family Inceptions<...

In this episode of Fertility Cafe, host Eloise Drain discusses the complexities of the fertility journey with Dr. Camille Hammond. They explore the overwhelming nature of fertility issues, the importance of accurate information, and the myths surrounding infertility. Dr. Hammond emphasizes the need for patients to advocate for themselves, seek community support, and communicate effectively with their healthcare providers. The conversation highlights the emotional challenges faced by intended parents and the significance of balancing hope with realistic expectations throughout the fertility process. It emphasizes the significance of education in reproductive health, addressing the gaps in fertility education, and exploring financial resources available for fertility treatment. The discussion also highlights the emotional challenges faced by individuals dealing with fertility issues, including shame and fear, and encourages open dialogue and support. Learn more about Camille Hammond & The Cade Foundation : https://cadefoundation.org/about Chapters 00:00 Navigating the Fertility Journey 01:41 Understanding Fertility Myths 12:26 Balancing Hope and Realistic Expectations 17:46 Communication Barriers in Fertility Care 26:13 Understanding Family Health History

In this episode of Fertility Cafe, host Eloise Drain delves into the complexities of family building through adoption and fertility treatments. The conversation explores the evolving landscape of adoption, including domestic, international, and foster care options, while also addressing the realities of fertility treatments like IVF and surrogacy. With insights from over two decades in the fertility industry, the episode emphasizes the importance of understanding the emotional, legal, and financial aspects of each path. Listeners are encouraged to consider their personal values and circumstances when making decisions about family building. Book a Free Consultation Have questions about your surrogacy journey? Speak with our expert team today! https://familyinceptions.com/schedule-a-consultation/?utm_campaign=7853368-Fertility%20Cafe%20Podcast&utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social Curious about the cost of surrogacy? Use our Surrogacy Cost Calculator: https://familyinceptions.com/cost-of-surrogacy-calculator/?utm_campaign=7853368-Fertility%20Cafe%20Podcast&utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social Stay Connected Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fertilitycafe Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/fertilitycafe Website: https://thefertilitycafe.com More Resources Learn more about surrogacy & fertility: https://familyinceptions.com/intended-parents Listen to past episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@FertilityCafePodcast/playlists Get expert insights & updates: https://thefertilitycafe.com/resources All information shared is for educational purposes and subject to change. Always consult with a medical or legal professional for personalized advice.