🎄Holiday season 3: family conflicts

Feeling constantly anxious, tense, or overwhelmed, a state that can be more than just a hard time—it could be toxic stress. This type of stress, we experience as all-consuming, making it hard to relax. However, with the right support and practical tools, you can regain balance and shape confidence and resilience that lasts. What is toxic stress? Toxic stress is a prolonged state of stress. It’s the result of ongoing overwhelming and unmanageable challenges. It appears arises in situations where people feel stuck in difficult circumstances, like prolonged  adversity, neglect, trauma, or illness, lacking adequate support from family and members of their community. Toxic stress can be the result of childhood adversity, yet is also can also profoundly affect adults. Many adults may not recognize toxic stress symptoms until they escalate, sometimes leading to conditions like PTSD.   How to recover from toxic stress?   Create a support system Seek professional support Practice relaxation techniques Legs up the wall activating the parasympathetic nervous system to relax and calm down Focus on what you can control Stay active Participate in support programs Validate your feeling @drschwank @unesurcent

Living on a constant high speed train is mentally and physically exhausting, not only for the hyper anxious individual, but the entire surrounding. Most of the time, the anxious person is too preoccupied with the handicapping anxiety, that they’re not seeing and mentally understanding their behaviour’s impact on others.  This can lead to lots of frustration, misunderstandings, feeling hurt, extra vulnerable, even more anxious by trying to fix the situation, aggressive, as well as negative inwards, namely depressed.  It’s simple to talk about it from the outside, how to adjust and transition out of a hyper anxious state of mind, but super difficult to change behaviours, especially when chronically being on heightened anxiety.    How can yoga can help hyper anxious people?    It is its powerful connection between body and mind. Yoga can calm the hyper anxious mind by moving meditation. It is accessible for people of all ages, different physical fitness, and is possible to be practiced in any place, without the need of equipment. Yoga can be retrieved in situations of acute stress. Its bridging of body and mind is an extremely effective intervention, in such circumstances of acute stress.   @drschwank @unesurcent

Many of us have experienced a situation of anxiety, may it be public speaking or your driver’s license ride. When there is lots on stake and personal, family, and societal expectations tied to it, we tend to over estimate the amount of time people spend being present and having an opinion about it. High achievers, with high intrinsic motivation, tend to overthink, overanalyse, and catastrophize events and their outcomes.   In order to reduce the symptoms of worrying; what often happens is that people run away from their fear even more. Aimless, like chased by a perpetrator, a wild animal. In such situations of hyper vigilance, we need to send the body and mind a signal of calm. This is however immensely difficult to remember, in a state of such acute (chronic) stress.   What helps fast? -Breathing deeply -High intensity exercise -Legs up the wall, other inversion position -Grounding exercises, shavasana -Meditation: body scan -Grounding foods: root vegetables, warm soups, date milk with cardamom & cinnamon   Listen to the podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/se/podcast/dr-simones-mind-space/id1532493956   @drschwank @unesurcent

Many children and their parents discuss and struggle with the same topic over and over: keeping school and generally for adults, their “stuff” organized. In order to be successful in school and generally in life, we very clear need how to organize individual people, small and big groups. The better we keep track of things, the less time we’d actually need and the less physical and mental effort would be required. We’d be able to allocate our resources to other things, which are most likely more stimulating and intellectually more demanding and interesting. It saves us a lot of mental space, that’s then free to be used  in more creative ways. This is also one of the explanations, why we often miss out on qualitative time, not “contaminated” with re- or post-organizing.   Write a to-do list -Plan your outfits and outfits of your child -Always return things to the place they belong -Routines rock as always -Have a routine in getting ready in the morning and evening unpack your belongings for yourself and your child -Engage all family members in keeping their belongings organized -An organized room, apartment keeps you accountable and sets a scene to be all planned out -Use a decluttering and gifting to charity approach for the entire family to avoid piling up too much stuff -Go with the flow, if organization doesn’t work out one day -Let children play and have them after playing and pulling out everything return the toys     @drschwank @unesurcent

A time of excitement, anxiety, and increased stress for all family members. Expectations, visions, milestones, and goals. As a family, each member contributes to supporting each other. Every member has a responsibility to make the common goal successful. This approach gives each member autonomy to achieve the envisioned milestones. Discuss with everyone how you’d like to achieve the goal. Who’s going to do what. By setting tangible goals, each one can feel engaged, motivated, and can be held accountable. And in all of this, never feel to be an add on, but a honest member.     References https://raisingchildren.net.au/toddlers/behaviour/understanding-behaviour/about-self-esteem   @drschwank @unesurcent

It’s holiday season and for many parents around the world, this implies travelling with kids. Maybe you visit a family member alone with your child. How to cope with solo travelling?   Some recommendations: AA as -Travel Compact -Don’t bring too many toys. New places are like lot we s of new toys -Pack using lists to organise and minimise unnecessary multiples -Comfort before price: take that taxi instead of bus etc -Ask for help, don’t be shy -Bring enough funny snacks for the train, flight, car ride -Hydrate yourself and your child well -Stay relaxed, your child will be too -Go with the flow -Humour always helps   @drschwank @unesurcent

Many parents around the world struggle with sleeping patterns of their children and often themselves too. What to do? Especially, when on holiday break? It’s a challenging endeavour and can make one get to physical and mental exhaustion. It’s important to listen to oneself and one’s body’s signals. Having a different sleeping schedule comparing to the everyday life is rather normal during the holidays. Don’t we adults have that too? Why do we expect anything different from our kids? Yet, it doesn’t take away the wonders and questions of self doubt if we’re doing something wrong.   Some recommendations for better sleeping hygiene: Routines rock, BUT adjust them to your situational needs!! Rituals and symbols are a good way of easing into sleeping Go with the flow Keep your own healthy sleeping routine and lead by example A prior to bed ceremony can help the mind settle in Use symbols such as washing your and your child’s face (a bath), creaming the body, light a candle or use a room sent to set the scene for coziness 💤💤💤 @drschwank @unesurcent

What to do as working parents when daycare/ schools are closed?   The holidays weather in the northern hemisphere is usually quite a challenge. Especially, with smaller kids who can’t yet be put on skis. Many parents decide to skip the chaos up in the Swiss mountains, but where to go to get some urgently needed sunlight and not too much hassle?   Parents of small children in the lowlands of Switzerland are best equipped, if they have a day bag packed. Ready for an easy start to head out into the sun. Overall, gloves, winter boots, hat, and sunglasses ready at hand.   Activities around the lake of Zurich: -Uetliberg (check webcam and crowded!) -Felsenegg cable care & tea house (open on weekends) -Albis great view, lots of sun, and awesome slide ride hill (car or postcard only) -Any place higher up near by, such as: Einsiedeln, Rigi, even St. Gallen   Catch a train and off you go!     @drschwank @unesurcent

Spending time with loved ones can be one of the greatest joys of the winter holidays. But family time can also result in conflict.   Long manifested challenging family dynamics can cause friction between members of ones and cast a shadow over happy gatherings.   There is always the family members that don’t get along. Holiday stress can amplify the already tense situation among family members, especially if out-of-town visitors are staying with you. Even joyous family gatherings can add stress by creating more work for those who are hosting relatives or traveling out of town for family gatherings. @drschwank @unesurcent  

Prioritizing guilt free self care is essential. Self care is often misinterpret  as a luxury “problem”. The opposite is true, it’s an intentional practice that nurtures your emotional, spiritual, physical, and intellectual well-being.   As many are parents; especially mothers, experiencing reoccurring guilt is a big topic. Guilt for not spending enough time with the children, not giving the child top priority, nor being fully present and dedicated at work. The omnipresent feeling of guilt is exhausting and can be defined as contaminated time.   Self care implies establishing habits that allow to sustain long-term, not just recover from moments of exhaustion.    Seeking help from a mental health coach or therapist to a make a significant difference in managing seasonal pressures. @drschwank @unesurcent