188 Intentional Use of Tension

One of the key ways to strengthen our intuition as a highly sensitive in business and leadership is through the core practice of using the energy management tool of autowriting. As an untrained HSP, our early environment training can easily override or influence the sensitivity genes and keep us stuck in unhelpful past patterns. Instead, we can choose to do “”the real work”” of a trained HSP and use energy management tools to create a change in our nervous system response and therefore more deliberately access our highly sensitive strengths such as intuition. This core practice can support us with tapping into higher guidance in order to manage end-of-year chaos, family dynamics or drama, challenges in your business, or any other concern, struggle or worry. When we use energy management as a true sense of self-nurture and with the intention of forward movement, then our intuition can be channelled to powerfully create the real change and impact we are each meant to bring to the world. In today’s episode, I continue the conversation from our last episode – where I celebrated our 200th episode and included a surprise gift for you! – and discussed one of our most important highly sensitive strengths – our intuition. Today we talk about the energy management tool of autowriting which can really support HSPs in business and leadership with strengthening our intuition intentionally so we can receive guidance to take action on what will most support us as we continue to navigate challenges during these exceptional times. I share how the core practice of using energy management tools consistently makes everything easier when it comes to your business or any form of leadership that you’re looking to bring into the world. Whether that is access to easier creative marketing, ability to more easily create a genuine connection in a selling conversation, greater access to aligning the team that’s meant to support you, or whatever it is that you are focusing on right now. Be sure to listen until the end where I guide you through an autowriting experience to support you with receiving guidance on a current struggle, concern, worry or maybe an area of confusion or unknown.   “Using energy management tools is going to create a change in our nervous system response. Especially if you’re using energy management tools as a true sense of nurture with the intention of forward movement.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 4:38: What is needed to strengthen intuition 7:35: Why use energy management tools like autowriting 12:37: How intuition makes everything easier 14:29: How I use autowriting 19:19: A guided autowriting exercise   “When we’re using energy management tools, like autowriting, proactively and intentionally, the purpose is to make things lighter, to make things easier for ourselves.“ – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Listen to Podcast Episode 200: The HSP Superpower of Deliberate Intuition: https://www.businessmiracles.com/podcast-episodes/deliberate-intuition/ Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: http://www.differentthebook.com/ Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com/ Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com/ Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/201    

If there is one thing that we can claim as an HSP superpower, it would be our intuition. When deliberately strengthened this is our edge in any business or leadership endeavour we engage in, and it is highly important that we learn to strengthen our intuition as a core practice. It is one of the things that can set you up to truly be able to work less while making more impact and income. However, another aspect of the sensitivity gene, our early environment, also plays a part in how we respond in our everyday living and running of our businesses. Often, what you are calling your intuition is actually coming from your early environment training, and it is crucial for us to learn to decipher between the two to avoid getting stuck in limiting beliefs that do not serve us. This is a major component of the work we do in the Highly Sensitive Leadership Training Programs, so much so that we engage in intentional intuitive planning as a full community several times a year. In this special milestone episode, I shine the spotlight on our keystone superpower of intuition as highly sensitives in business and leadership. I talk about how we can easily confuse true intuition with early environment training, which when not examined can set us up to repeat unhelpful past patterns instead of pulling us forward into creating meaningful impact through our businesses. I share information from a study by Christine Ma-Kellams and Jennifer Lerner that examines whether an intuitive mode of thought or a systematic mode of thought is more accurate. The results might surprise you! Listen in to hear how you can deliberately strengthen your intuition to really work for you as a superpower through these exceptional times, and stay tuned until the end for a special mentor challenge!   “Just because you have the ability to take in stimulation at a much higher degree doesn’t mean that you are set up to automatically be able to take in that stimulation in a way that’s positive.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 3:38: How to strengthen your intuition as a core practice 6:31: Ways to decipher the difference between sensitivity genes and early environment information 11:29: How to train our intuition to work for us and guide us 14:37: What makes it easier to trust our intuition as highly sensitive leaders   “A major component of that training and the work that we do here in the highly sensitive leadership training programs is to decipher between the sensitivity genes and early environment information.” – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: http://www.differentthebook.com/ Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com/ Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com/ Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/200  

There is just so much that is in motion in the world right now and so much that is unpredictable. Constant change is guaranteed; to try to resist this constant change is only going to make it that much more difficult to navigate. Here’s the good news: managing change as an HSP in business and leadership is a skill that can be learned. When you commit to this process as a core practice, your self esteem strengthens, you’re more easily able to access acceptance and you develop a genuine confidence to manage and master ongoing change as a highly sensitive leader. You can then stop using energy to try to keep change from happening and instead channel that energy into creating the results you want no matter what is transpiring around you. In today’s episode, I share how we are currently experiencing constant change and unpredictability and that the times we are in are not going to be over anytime soon. I discuss the importance of managing our reactions to change as highly sensitive entrepreneurs and leaders and how, now more than ever, we need to commit to the path of mastery in order to grow and succeed through these times in our businesses and our relationships. To better understand this path of mastery, I talk about attachment styles with a focus on shifting from the anxious attachment style to the secure attachment style. I explore the ways that resistance to shifting from anxious to secure shows up, sharing examples I often see with members I mentor in the Highly Sensitive Leadership Training Programs and how by leaning in, joining together, and with the power of aligned community we can truly transcend the ongoing, ever-changing times we are collectively living through.   “There is way too much that’s unpredictable, way too many people behaving unpredictably that to try to resist the constant of change is only going to make it that much more difficult for yourself.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 5:13: How to strengthen our reactions to change 5:53: What can crisis look like to highly sensitive people 6:59: What are the highly sensitive attachment styles and how do they respond to change 10:04: Ways that highly sensitives engage in the struggle between choice and action 12.11: How does resistance show up in highly sensitive leadership training 15:35: Final takeaways   “As we give deliberate attention to mastering our reactions to change as highly sensitives, our reaction will shift and change. The more we practice over a longer period of time, the more our self esteem will strengthen and more easily we will be able to access acceptance and a new sense of confidence to be able to manage and master change as a highly sensitive leader, and particularly a highly sensitive leader who embraces their essential self.” – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: The Highly Sensitive Leadership Revolution: http://www.differentthebook.com Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/199    

There’s a lot of energy moving right now all around the world, and although your particular flavor of turmoil and chaos may differ depending on where in the world you are, as a highly sensitive your nervous system is feeling it. Whether you’re experiencing political drama, family overcommitments as the holidays approach, challenging business stressors, or even threats to your personal safety all of this can feel especially difficult to manage in the moment. Yet we have the opportunity to practice privilege of agency and take personal responsibility to manage your nervous system reactions to your circumstances. You can make a choice to take action and use energy techniques to ground you and energy management to support you in continuing to take steps to create what it is that you desire and in the way that you desire. In this podcast episode, I share the difference between energy management and energy techniques. I discuss the Bowan Family Dynamics theory and my subjective connection between being highly sensitive and being the absorber of the family. I talk about how this leads us as HSPs to be especially susceptible to nervous system overwhelm as a reaction to what’s happening in the world at this time. If you are an untrained highly sensitive, then you are likely experiencing this energy as stress and are defaulting to fight, flight, freeze, or fawn – or getting triggered into your default coping mechanisms of pushing, hiding, or combo plattering between the two. Yet if you are a trained highly sensitive leader, you can make a choice to take personal responsibility right now and turn to both energy techniques and energy management to ground yourself. Listen in as I share 3 powerful energy techniques to bring calm to your nervous system so you can be of the highest service through business as a highly sensitive leader, especially during times of intensity.   “We do not buy into the highly sensitive shadow pathway that everything is happening to us. Instead, we take measures to activate privilege of agency and locate where there is empowerment within choice.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 2:25: Why are energy-shifting techniques important 5:14: How does the Bowen Family Dynamic Theory apply to highly sensitive people 9:18: What is the difference between energy management and energy techniques 10:49: Which energy techniques can we use to calm down 18:35: How to use energy management tools   “The absorber of the family is the person in the family who’s designated to hold all of the feelings and specifically anxiety.” – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: http://www.differentthebook.com/ Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com/ Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com/ Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/198

Using your HSP strengths to build genuine connections in your business can support you in business networking, leadership, team communications, and any difficult conversations in your business or personal life. Creating a genuine connection requires mutual trust and understanding as well as vulnerability on both sides. It creates a deeper level of understanding and allows us to grow and learn more about ourselves through learning more about others. The untrained HSP waits for others to take the lead and allows their automatic trauma responses to dictate their relationships, but the trained HSP takes the lead and sets the energy, sets the stage and does it differently. In this podcast episode, I discuss what assumption of positive intent is NOT as well as what it IS and how it specifically relates to making genuine connections as an HSP in business and leadership. I share how assumption of positive intent gives you access to your HSP strengths and I provide the 3 keys to follow in order to form meaningful genuine connections and how this leads to more income. Be sure to listen until the end for a short exercise where I support you in discovering a current situation where you can begin to use these 3 keys to transform your business relationships starting right away.   “Assumption of positive intent is the opposite of our HSP shadow of judgment of others.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 1:45: What does it mean to assume positive intent 2:46: How to assume positive intent in five steps 4:21: How does the assumption of positive intent apply to making genuine connections 6:07: What does a genuine connection look like “Assumption of positive intent is not avoiding conflict.” – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: The Highly Sensitive Leadership Revolution: http://www.differentthebook.com Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/197  

Each of us highly sensitives has our own set of beliefs, perspectives, and experiences that shape how we see everything, including interactions with other people. It can be all too common for us to make quick assumptions and react when someone says or does something we perceive to be intentionally mean or hurtful, especially if it triggers an automatic trauma response. This reaction (or maybe even over-reaction) is due to our assumption of poor intent. In situations like this, an untrained HSP will very likely overreact in some way, maybe lashing out or shutting down as a way to protect and attempt to keep safe. However, trained HSPs can choose to master the skill of assuming positive intent and avoid falling into this trap. In this episode I discuss the topic of assumption of positive intent, sharing more on what it is and why it is so important for us to be in practice with this skill in all our relationships as HSPs, especially in business. I talk about why we struggle with this skill and what we can do about it, outlining five steps that we can take to assume positive intent. Where this can especially come in handy for us as highly sensitives in business and leadership is networking, sales conversations, team hiring, team delegation, and any difficult conversation. Research shows that adopting this positive mindset can can help reduce misunderstandings and conflict with others and overall can also lead to a happier, more harmonious life. And I would add as a result, an experience of less effort, more impact and more income as a highly sensitive leader.   “Assumption of positive intent is the opposite of the HSP shadow of judgment of others.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 2:28: What does it mean to assume positive intent 3:21: Why do people assume positive intent in others 4:56: Why do HSPs struggle with the assumption of positive intent in others 7:55: How to assume positive intent in others 10:41: Why you should question your gut reaction   “Assumption of positive intent is also the opposite of our HSP shadow of judgment of self and tendency to be self-critical.” – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: The Highly Sensitive Leadership Revolution: http://www.differentthebook.com Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/196

As highly sensitives, we all have unhelpful patterns. It’s part of the process of shifting out of our HSP shadows and stepping into our HSP strengths. For those of us HSPs who choose to be in business and leadership, this shift is necessary in order for us to achieve more peace, productivity and impact. What will support you with stepping into your strengths and identifying current unhelpful HSP patterns is exploring HSP types. This will allow you to further know yourself as a highly sensitive leader more deeply as well as enhance your dominant HSP strengths. In this episode I identify the four different HSP types for you. I also share in detail the strengths and the unhelpful shadow energy drain for each type. Through listening to the different characteristics that make up each type, you will be able to identify which type, or likely a combination of more than one type, most resonates with you. Armed with this knowledge you can use it to uncover your own unhelpful HSP patterns and explore alternatives to enhance your dominant HSP strengths in order to be more creative and productive and then therefore more profitable and impactful in business and leadership.   “We all have unhelpful HSP patterns. It is part of the process of going from being an untrained HSP to a trained HSP. It’s part of the process of shifting from HSP shadows to HSP strengths and it is a constant process.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 1:54: How to shift unhelpful highly sensitive patterns 2:50: Why is it important to shift unhelpful highly sensitive patterns 3:44: how to identify unhelpful highly sensitive patterns 5:55: What are the different HSP types   “We want to shift our unhelpful HSP patterns all so that we can have more peace in our minds…so that we can be more creative and more productive, make more of a difference for others – more impact – and experience more of what we want – more income – and what that brings to each of us and our own individual life experiences.” – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: The Highly Sensitive Leadership Revolution: http://www.differentthebook.com Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/195

A common cognitive distortion that HSPs fall prey to is all or nothing thinking, which causes you to see the world more negatively than it really is, and is linked to anxiety, depression, and even PTSD. As highly sensitives in business and leadership, it is important to engage in the retraining of your nervous system and develop high functioning skills based on your HSP strengths so you can grow resilience, alleviate anxiety and move forward towards your desires and dreams in spite of any chaos or disruption that is happening around you. All so you are able to walk through and lead the way for yourself, your family and friends, your team, and your clients. In this episode, I talk about the common tendency for highly sensitives to fall into either/or thinking, and how this is often the result of our lifelong experience of feeling othered and misunderstood. I explain that this pattern of thought, that most often is not based on facts, is an opportunity for us to develop high-functioning HSP skills based on our HSP strengths so we can shift into the both/and approach. I share three steps to support you in making this shift and empowering yourself and others to operate from this approach. All so that you can be of highest service not only to yourself, but to others and for the overall betterment of the world.   “It’s very fascinating that the belief transformation tool tends to be kind of like the black sheep of the energy management tools.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 1:51: What is all-or-nothing thinking 2:20: What is cognitive distortion 3:21: Why is either-or thinking common for HSPs 5:55: How to move from either-or to both-and thinking 7:09: How does the process of metacognition begin 15:19: Tips for using the both-and approach 18:01: What happens when anxiety alleviates   “We tend to favor the Order Form to the Universe, Autowriting and Scripting, and then it’s like, ugh, yeah, that BTT. The BTT sitting over in the corner, sad.” – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: The Highly Sensitive Leadership Revolution: http://www.differentthebook.com Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit – Stop the Overwhelm: http://www.stoptheoverwhelm.com/ Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/194

As an HSP in business and leadership, it is important to learn how to first shift from sympathy to empathy, and then from empathy to compassion. To do this we need to actively engage in identifying and experiencing our full range of emotions, and then manage our response to those feelings using nervous system management tools in order to access lightheartedness and flow into hopeful action in spite of. All so we can be of highest service to ourselves, those we serve, and everyone around us. In this episode, I go into depth about the difference between sympathy, empathy, and compassion. I discuss how compassion is where we as highly sensitives in business and leadership are able to make the greatest difference and impact because compassion is the willingness to take action in service to positive change, which is often why we’ve chosen to be in business in the first place. I also share how lightheartedness supports us in being able to make the shift from empathy into compassion and what you can do to access hope and lightheartedness to stay out of the trap of limiting beliefs and HSP shadow behaviors.   “Our nervous system is wired to take in stimulation at a much higher degree, which means we are able to really intuit what another person is thinking, what they’re feeling, what they’re experiencing, and when we’re in a strength perspective, that allows us the ability to understand and share the feelings of that other person.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 1:45: What is empathy 3:40: What is the difference between sympathy and empathy 4:25: What is compassion 7:53: How to flow into hopeful action “Compassion is more engaged than simple empathy because it involves the willingness to take action.” – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: The Highly Sensitive Leadership Revolution: http://www.differentthebook.com Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/193

In a time when so many people are operating from fear when it comes to investments and income, it is more important than ever to step forward and show up as leaders in our families, communities, businesses, and organizations. Not through coping, but from empathetic compassion to demonstrate to others how a different way is possible. That you can hold things lightly, care deeply, and act with clarity, even (and especially) with investments and income generation, in order to achieve the financial peace that you desire. In this episode, I discuss the importance of lightheartedness when it comes to your investments and to generating income in your business as a highly sensitive. I share how your nervous system responds to what you feed it, and since we have a higher nervous system response than the other 80%, the non-highly sensitives of the world, the key to our success lies in using both inner and outer core practices to keep our vibe up and access hope over worry. This is our role as a Royal Advisor in these tumultuous times.   “We have control over what we feed our nervous system.” – Heather Dominick Listen and Learn: 2:35: Why people worry 7:22: How to find financial peace 10:50: What to ask yourself when you want to make change in your life 17:26: How to make use of the royal advisor role “The limbic part of the nervous system responds to what we feed it, worry or otherwise. HSPs have higher nervous system response.” – Heather Dominick   Links and Resources: Get your copy of Heather’s book DIFFERENT: The Highly Sensitive Leadership Revolution: http://www.differentthebook.com Get your copy of the HSE Training Kit: Survive to Thrive: http://www.shiftfromsurvivetothrive.com Get your copy of the HSE Assessment and Success Guide: http://www.myhsetype.com Learn more about this episode of Business Miracles at https://www.businessmiracles.com/192