Travis Jay: Girl Dads and Exes Controlling The Narrative

In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-host Cilla Kessie and special guest co-host comedian, actor and writer Travis Jay, who’s bringing the male perspective as more and more dilemmas from dads land in the inbox.The first dilemma is from a father whose teenage children want nothing to do with his new partner after their mum told them he had an affair. Her children have welcomed him warmly, but his own kids are cold and distant. Should children even be told about affairs? And if an affair did happen, does that change what they deserve to know?The conversation quickly heats up. Travis argues that if he didn’t cheat, he should fight the narrative. That sparks debate about loyalty, accountability and whether kids ever really know the full truth about their parents. The panel also get into a bigger question, do women cheat as much as men, or are we just not talking about it?The second dilemma comes from a dad struggling with his ex moving on. He insists it’s not jealousy, but he’s uncomfortable with another man spending time around his daughter and wants to meet him. His ex says it’s too soon. The panel question whether if it’s too soon to meet the dad, it’s too soon to meet the child. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and special guest co-host Dr Lalitaa Suglani, an award-winning psychologist, high-functioning anxiety coach and author.Together they unpack two dilemmas around anxiety, ADHD and the pressure to cope in blended family life. The first dilemma comes from a stepmum who lives with high functioning anxiety and depression. Every other weekend, before her stepchildren arrive, her body goes into panic mode. Racing heart, tight stomach, irritability and overwhelm. She finds herself avoiding the situation by leaving the house, but she wants to understand why this happens and how to manage it better. Nathalie challenges her perspective, while Dr Lalitaa explains what is happening and shares practical tools to regulate the nervous system, create boundaries around space, and slowly build tolerance rather than forcing herself to cope.The second dilemma is from a mum with ADHD who feels constant guilt. She loves her child deeply but struggles with burnout, overstimulation and frustration, especially when her stepchild is there too. She worries she is failing and overcompensates out of guilt. The panel open up about ADHD, shame and executive dysfunction. Nathalie shares her own experience with ADHD, Kate reflects on parental burnout, and Dr Lalitaa breaks down how overstimulation impacts regulation, attachment and self belief.The episode also includes simple breathing techniques to calm the nervous system and practical strategies for managing high functioning anxiety in real time.Check Out Dr Lalitaa Suglani's book High-Functioning Anxiety Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla for a conversation that starts close to home.Cilla drops a bomb about a personal family situation she’s been navigating, and the ladies rally around her, reminding her just how strong she’s been through everything. Blended families aren’t just about step parents and children, they include extended family too, and sometimes that’s where things get complicated.The first dilemma centres on a sister-in-law who ignores her brother’s child because she doesn’t like his wife. The mum is worried it’s now affecting the child and doesn’t know how to handle the tension without making things worse.The second dilemma is wedding drama. A bride feels her sister-in-law, who is also the event planner, is making the big day about herself and taking over decisions. She hasn’t said anything to her partner yet and is questioning whether she’s overreacting.Kate, Nathalie and Cilla dive into boundaries, communication and when you have to speak up even if it feels uncomfortable. And for once, the panel don’t all agree. Cilla and Nathalie challenge Kate’s view, leading to a honest and divided conversation. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions around coercive and post separation abuse. In this episode of Blended, Kate is joined by Nathalie and special guest co-host Legally Nik, family and child protection lawyer, who is back to help the panel unpack some of your most complex legal dilemmas.The episode begins by revisiting the conversation from a few weeks ago with @Jessrunsforsurvivors, diving deeper into narcissistic ex-partners and coercive control. Nik explains that coercive control is illegal but incredibly difficult to prove. She breaks down what it looks like in court, how the legal system approaches it, and shares practical advice on communication tools such as yellow rocking and creating safer boundaries.The second dilemma focuses on frustrations with the Child Maintenance Service. A listener feels it is unfair that when starting a new family, payments are only reduced by a small percentage. Nik explains why the system works as it does, why nobody is ever completely happy with it and why the law ultimately prioritises the child above all else.The final dilemma is from a mum who wants to take her child on holiday but is being told she needs the father’s permission because they have different surnames. Nik clarifies the legal position, explaining that surnames are irrelevant and consent is still required where parental responsibility is shared.As always, Kate and Nathalie ask the questions many blended families are thinking and Nik provides the legal clarity behind the emotions.For more support contact Legally Nik Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla, who shares an update on a family situation she previously opened up about and how she handled a recent interaction with that family member. They tackle a tricky dilemma, a woman who separated from her husband admits she never felt fully accepted by her stepchildren. She showed up, she tried, but she remembers distance and rejection. Now, years later, her ex stepson has invited her to his wedding, describing her as a big part of his life. She is shocked. She does not remember it that way. She is asking whether she is obligated to go, and whether she needs to honour his version of the past when her experience felt so different. Kate, Nathalie and Cilla unpack what it means when memories do not match, why children may remember your presence differently than you do, and whether closure has to look like attendance. They explore the right to protect your peace, the power of simply showing up, and how blended relationships can leave lasting impact even when they felt strained at the time. This episode is about perspective, boundaries and the complicated legacy of step parenting.   Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions around coercive and post separation abuse.In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Cilla are joined by Jess, known online as @JessRunsForSurvivors. Jess creates content around co-parenting with someone with narcissistic traits and is a patron for the charity Mums in Need, which supports women facing post separation abuse and coercive control.Jess shares part of her own story and what life has been like navigating co parenting with someone displaying narcissistic behaviours. She explains the complexity around narcissism as a disorder, why it requires clinical diagnosis, and why obtaining that diagnosis is often difficult.The panel then tackles two difficult listener dilemmas.In the first, a stepmum is worried that her stepdaughter’s behaviour dramatically shifts after time spent at her dad’s house. The child returns hostile towards her stepsister and stepdad, repeating phrases that feel planted. The stepmum fears the dynamic is slowly destabilising her home and does not know how to protect her family without escalating the situation.In the second dilemma, a woman describes how her ex presents as charming and composed publicly, yet attempts to undermine her behind the scenes. He has contacted her workplace claiming concern about her mental health and continues to interfere in subtle but damaging ways. Kate and Cilla admit they find parts of these stories difficult to comprehend, questioning how anyone copes with this level of manipulation. Jess offers practical tools and strategies including grey rocking, tightening communication, regulating tone, and even using tools like AI to draft neutral responses in high conflict situations. For more support follow @jessrunsforsurvivors and check out Mums In Need Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Mother’s Day has always meant something special to Blended. Please Note: This episode was recorded on Thursday 26th February, before the recent conflict in the Middle East. As mums and as a podcast that talks about family life, our hearts are with everyone affected by the devastating events that have unfolded since this recording. This episode is the first ever remote recording of Blended, Kate recorded from Dubai on while Nathalie and Cilla joined from London.After putting a question box out to the Blended Instagram, the messages flooded in. One major theme was the pressure around buying gifts for the ex. Several stepmums shared that their partner expects them to organise Mother’s Day cards and presents for the bio mum, sometimes even extravagant ones. The panel discusses boundaries, emotional labour and whether managing that relationship is really the stepmum’s responsibility.They also tackle the complex dynamic of stepping into a family where the children’s mum has passed away. What happens when you are doing the daily parenting but feel you cannot be publicly celebrated in case it upsets extended family? Kate shares her own experience and how she has navigated that delicate balance.Alongside the dilemmas, the ladies open up about how they will be spending Mother’s Day themselves and why this date continues to matter so much to the show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

 One stepmum feels ignored in her concerns. Another feels invisible in her relationship. This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Nathalie are joined by therapist, bestselling author, TV presenter and podcast host Anna Williamson for an honest conversation about child anxiety and what happens to intimacy when life changes overnight.Anna speaks openly about her own mental health journey and why it led her to her training as a therapist and write the books she has. Her perspective shapes two powerful listener dilemmas.In the first, a stepmum believes she can see clear signs of anxiety in her stepdaughter. She notices changes in behaviour, emotional withdrawal and subtle warning signs, but her partner insists she is projecting. Is she overstepping or is she the only adult paying attention? Anna breaks down what anxiety can really look like in children, the role phones and social media may play and how to raise concerns without damaging your relationship.In the second dilemma, a stepmum admits her relationship has completely changed since the children moved in full time. What used to be spontaneous and passionate now feels interrupted and distant. She jokes that the kids have a spidy sense for knowing exactly when she and her partner are about to get it on. The panel discuss how blended life can quietly erode intimacy, why resentment builds and practical ways to protect your relationship when parenting takes over.Don’t forget to rate and review, also we love hearing from you so follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When you choose to stay after an affair but the affair created a child, what does moving forward really look like?This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla to unpack two deeply emotional dilemmas about families that didn’t break apart but were permanently changed.In the first, a wife shares how she and her husband worked through his infidelity but now there is a child from the affair. At a recent BBQ she felt embarrassed, exposed and emotionally overwhelmed. She never imagined becoming a stepmum this way, yet her husband wants everyone to come together as one family. In the second dilemma, the extended family invites the Love child’s mother to gatherings. The panel reacts strongly as they discuss boundaries, respect and whether forgiveness of a partner automatically means full acceptance of everything that came from the betrayal.Kate admits she finds this one hard. She and Cilla debate what forgiveness really means in practice and can you truly separate an innocent child from the pain attached to how they arrived? Nathalie questions whether forgiving without consequence risks repeating the cycle.This episode is honest, emotional and challenging because sometimes healing isn’t about leaving, It's about learning how to live with what happened.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and special guest co-host Chuckie Online, presenter, DJ and podcast host, for a powerful conversation from the perspective we don’t hear often enough, the stepson.Chucky opens up about growing up with both a loving dad and a loving stepdad, and how their dynamic shaped him. He reflects on the unique balance between his mum, his dad and his stepdad, and how he never even realised he was in a blended family because it simply felt normal. He also shares the emotional impact of losing his stepdad and how the family navigated that grief together.The episode then turns to a listener dilemma. A mum is terrified that tension between her teenage son and her husband is escalating. Her son is taller now, more defiant, and when her husband raises his voice at her, her son steps in, chest puffed and ready to fight. She fears that if things ever turn physical, there will be no coming back from it.Together, Kate, Cilla and Chuckie discuss boundaries, communication, male ego, teenage triggers and the absolute line that cannot be crossed. They unpack what teenage boys are really reacting to, how past experiences can heighten protective instincts, and why protecting the relationship before it reaches breaking point is critical.An honest, emotional episode about loyalty, respect and what happens when power struggles threaten family stability.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.