Ep18: Finding Equanimity through Community, Self-Compassion, & Stealth Metta with La Sarmiento

Host Ying Deng (ADHD Asian Girl) interviews meditation teacher La Sarmiento, a vipassana practitioner since 1998 and immigrant, non-binary, queer Filipinx American committed to accessible teachings that alleviate suffering. La shares how they meet the current moment by creating inner and outer space, limiting stressful media intake, and prioritizing rest so they can serve from a resourced place. They define equanimity as holding “10,000 joys and 10,000 sorrows,” cultivating joy, laughter, and connection alongside awareness of suffering, and grounding experiences in historical context. Sustaining practices include sangha/community, nature, dancing and singing, looking people in the eye, and “stealth metta,” plus acting locally with small kindnesses. La discusses identity, radical acceptance, self-compassion as neuroplastic re-patterning, mindful language that preserves agency, non-identification with emotions, accountability and repair when harm occurs, and offers closing well-wishes for all beings. 00:00 Welcome to ADHD Gathering 00:18 Meet La Sarmiento 01:45 Finding Space Now 03:53 What Is Equanimity 06:12 Joyful Sustaining Practices 09:24 Stealth Metta Story 11:32 Identity and Resilience 14:49 Building Self Acceptance 19:34 4 Engaged Practice Check-In Questions 23:09 Absolute and Relative Truth 25:59 Hope in Affinity Groups 29:33 Working With Judgment 32:52 Closing Blessings Listen now on Apple Podcast and Spotify Find this episode’s transcript here. This is part of a mini series of me asking my teachers and friends “how do we face this momemnt collectively”, you can find the other episodes in this mini series here. Resources: Booking a free coaching discovery call with Ying, an award winning ADHD coach & meditation teacher featured on Self Magazine Download a free ADHD emotional regulation menu Guest’s Bio: La Sarmiento (they/them) has been practicing Vipassana meditation since 1998. They are a teacher with Banyan Together and a contributor to the Happier App. They were a retreat teacher with Tara Brach and the Guiding Teacher of the BIPOC and LGBTQIA+ Sanghas with the Insight Meditation Community of Washington, DC (IMCW), a mentor for the Mindfulness Meditation Teacher Certification Program, and the Lead Teacher of the Virginia Inward Bound Mindfulness Education (iBme) Teen Retreats. They completed the Spirit Rock Community Dharma Leader Training in 2012 and teach retreats around the US.  As an immigrant, non-binary, queer, Filipinx-American, La is committed to creating access to and sharing teachings and practices that alleviate suffering, cultivate true happiness, and support the liberation of all beings, especially through song and laughter.  La lives outside of Baltimore, MD with Tytheir life partner Wendy and rescue pup Bader and enjoys building Lego and writing dharma spoof songs on their ukelele. 

Host Ying Deng interviews Amy Jones, a certified functional nutritionist and ADHD life coach, about late ADHD diagnosis and practical nutrition supports for ADHD. Amy shares her 40s diagnosis after years of anxiety, depression, burnout, and resistance from doctors, sparked by her son’s ADHD/ASD diagnosis, which reframed her shame and self-understanding. They discuss why feeding oneself is executive-function heavy, how missed cues, hyperfocus, and medication can lead to under-fueling, blood sugar crashes, and impaired executive function, irritability, brain fog, cravings, and dysregulation. Amy emphasizes planning for low-capacity days by mapping energy patterns, using external cues (alarms, sticky notes), keeping easy snacks accessible, and treating meals as “assembly” rather than cooking. She contrasts holistic vs functional nutrition, including targeted testing (genetics, gut, hormones/cortisol) and nutrients like B12, magnesium, iron, and zinc, and calls for shifting nutrition narratives away from morality toward accessibility and systems. 00:00 Welcome to ADHD Gathering00:18 Meet Amy Jones00:37 Late ADHD Diagnosis Story04:50 Food and Executive Function07:35 Blood Sugar and Brain Fuel11:22 Coaching Break and Offer12:20 Emotions Energy and Nutrients15:40 Plan for Low Capacity Days18:43 Mini Meals and Fasting Myths22:51 Functional Nutrition Explained25:43 Easy Food Systems at Home30:27 Rethink Nutrition Narratives32:14 Final Takeaways and Goodbye Listen now on Apple Podcast and Spotify Find this episode’s transcript here. Resources: Booking a free coaching discovery call with Ying, an award winning ADHD coach & meditation teacher featured on Self Magazine Download a free ADHD emotional regulation menu Guest’s Bio: Amy is a Certified Functional Nutrition Practitioner, Certified ADHD Life Coach, Registered Holistic Nutritionist, and former Ontario teacher who spent nearly 20 years in education before moving into functional nutrition and ADHD coaching. She’s also a late-diagnosed ADHD adult and a mom of two neurodivergent kids, which shapes the way she understands food, executive function, and energy. Amy supports neurodivergent adults, parents, and overwhelmed humans understand why food becomes harder when ADHD, decision fatigue, sensory load, and low-capacity days affect daily functioning Find Amy here: Amy’s website https://www.amyjonesnutrition.com Amy’s Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/amyjonesnutrition/ Amy’s othe social media links: https://amyjonesnutrition.mykajabi.com/links

Host Ying Deng welcomes Ryan Baker Barrett, a Board Certified Behavior Analyst with ADHD who coaches ADHD teens and adults, to discuss how behavior analysis can support executive function while staying mindful of masking and shame. Ryan shares his late ADHD realization through experiences like “sticky shifting,” reading challenges, and time blindness, and explains his “roadmap” approach to assessment that focuses on foundational needs such as rejection sensitivity and realistic expectations rather than rigid, granular skill checklists. Ryan talks about parenting and self-regulation, emphasizing transparency, compassion, and accommodating real-life disruptions. Ryan describes blending behavior analysis with acceptance and commitment therapy tools like cognitive defusion (“I’m having the thought that…”) and values-based action to address both environmental supports and internal narratives. The conversation ends with highlighting ADHD strengths like hyperfocus and creative problem-solving. 00:00 Welcome to ADHD Gathering00:18 Meet Ryan Barrett02:19 Masking and Choice03:42 Ryan’s ADHD Diagnosis Story08:53 Sticky Shifting and Reading10:13 Executive Function Roadmap13:31 Parenting and Self Regulation17:39 Shame and Self Talk20:51 Blending ABA and ACT23:31 Self Compassion in Practice26:47 Realistic Goals and Skills29:56 Values, Discipline and Routines34:16 Hopeful ADHD Narratives36:56 Final Thanks and Outro Listen now on Apple Podcast and Spotify Find this episode’s transcript here. Resources: Booking a free coaching discovery call with Ying, an award winning ADHD coach & meditation teacher featured on Self Magazine Download a free ADHD emotional regulation menu Guest’s Bio: Ryan Baker-Barrett is a Board Certified Behavior Analyst with over 10 years of experience helping parents of kids with ADHD, along with teens and adults with ADHD, navigate life’s ups and downs. As an ADHD dad raising two boys with ADHD himself, Ryan brings more than clinical expertise to his work — he brings lived experience. He knows firsthand what it’s like to build systems that actually stick, to celebrate the wins that don’t always look like “normal” milestones, and to parent (and live) with a brain wired differently. That perspective shapes everything he does: practical, compassionate support for families and individuals figuring out what works for them. Find Ryan here: Ryan’s website: https://www.appliedbehavioral.health/ Ryan’s meditations: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLhC4jOaa8yeDX_hspr1NCue9YTFZbNB1X Ryan’s LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/ryan-baker-barrett Ryan’s other social media links https://linktr.ee/appliedbhp

ADHD, Activism, and Hope: Dian Dian on Community Organizing, Risk, and Micro-ActionsHost Ying Deng (ADHD Asian Girl) welcomes Dian Dian, a Seattle-based community organizer and researcher with a PhD in women’s, gender, and sexuality studies, who coordinates research and campaigns with the Massage Parlor Organizing Project and supports overseas Chinese queer women. Dian reflects on navigating today’s political crises through historical perspective and deep experience with activism, noting that doing tangible work for vulnerable immigrant workers brings steadiness. They discuss how marginalized and neurodivergent identities often draw people into organizing spaces that can be more accommodating, and compare movement work in China and the U.S., including growing risks, safety strategies, and censorship concerns. Dian shares sustaining practices, encourages bottom-up community politics and small, concrete actions, and offers approaches to conflict rooted in curiosity, listening, and story-sharing, emphasizing presence and care. Listen now on Apple Podcast and Spotify 00:00 Welcome to ADHD Gathering00:29 Meet Dian Dian02:10 Navigating a Chaotic Moment05:00 Identity and Organizing07:29 China vs US Activism09:08 Risk and Concrete Action14:55 Daily Practices That Sustain15:49 Redefine Politics18:19 How to Get Involved22:24 Micro Actions and Connection24:33 Hope and What Is Necessary28:23 Talking Across Differences33:00 Closing Reflections and Care Find this episode’s transcript here. Resources: Booking a free coaching discovery call with Ying, an award winning ADHD coach & meditation teacher featured on Self Magazine Download a free ADHD emotional regulation menu Guest’s Bio: Dian Dian is a community organizer and researcher working at the intersections of gender, sexuality, migration, and labor. They received a Ph.D. in Women’s, Gender, and Sexuality Studies from Emory University. Dian has been involved in LGBTQ+ and feminist movements since 2009. Now based in Seattle, they serve as research and campaign coordinator at MPOP (Massage Parlor Organizing Project) and support community building among overseas Chinese queer women through UPWOMXN (United Proud Womxn) Find Dian Dian on: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/foxdian The organization Dian Dian supports: Upwomxn.org linktr.ee/mpop_sea

Host Ying Deng interviews mindfulness teacher and nature-based practitioner Lisa Pedscalny about how to face “this moment” by discerning media intake and intentionally resting attention on both human systems in transition and the sustaining wisdom of the natural world. Lisa, a highly sensitive and neurodivergent naturalist on Vancouver Island, shares how spring rhythms (recorded back in February), interdependence, and cycles like compost mirror human renewal and inform sustainable engagement. She outlines non-negotiable “pillar practices” (nature time, contemplative practice, connection/community, and nourishment through food, rest, and movement) plus Maitri—unconditional friendliness toward oneself—framed as asking, “What does it mean to be the friend I most need in this moment?” They discuss love as a responsive practice, value-driven service through sanghas and Tara Brach’s Choosing to Love, sources of hope in peaceful actions and nature’s resilience, and close with a guided “coming to our senses” embodiment practice. Listen now on Apple Podcast and Spotify 00:00 Welcome to ADHD Gathering 00:18 Meet Lisa Pedscalny 01:57 Navigating This Moment 06:53 Sensitivity and Self Care 08:39 Pillar Practices Toolkit 11:44 Maitri Self Friendship 16:08 Tending the Soil Metaphor 18:06 What’s Mine to Do 21:48 Love as a Verb 24:31 Begin Again Practice 27:19 Resistance and Hope Stories 31:49 Embodiment: Coming to Senses 39:26 Closing Thanks and Farewell Find more podcast episodes. Find this episode’s transcript here. Resources: Booking a free coaching discovery call with Ying, an award winning ADHD coach & meditation teacher featured on Self Magazine Download a free ADHD emotional regulation menu Guest’s Bio: Lisa Pedscalny is a mindfulness teacher rooted in nearly twenty years of Vipassana practice and a lifelong relationship with the natural world. Her teaching grows from that lived connection, blending deep contemplative practice with close attention to the more-than-human world. A graduate of the Mindfulness Meditation Teacher Certification Program with Tara Brach and Jack Kornfield, Lisa facilitates trauma-informed retreats, courses, and sangha gatherings through Forest Floor Mindfulness and serves on the teaching team for Tara Brach’s yearlong program, Choosing to Love. Her work integrates mindfulness, embodiment, and ecological connection as pathways of healing, belonging, and sustainable engagement with the wider web of life. As a nature photographer specializing in fungi, Lisa brings the same attentive presence to the forest floor, inviting others into the simple, joyful practice of looking closely and discovering that mindfulness often arises naturally when we slow down and meet the living world with curiosity. She lives and practices on Vancouver Island in British Columbia, Canada, where time outdoors continues to shape and inform both her life and her teaching. Find Lisa on: Her website https://www.forestfloormindfulness.com/ (Lisa has a new bi-weekly practice group starting September 2026!) YouTube Instagram Facebook SoundCloud

On this episode, the host, Ying Deng, interviews Born I / Ofosu Jones-Quartey, a meditation teacher, hip hop artist, and author whose work blends music, mindfulness, and radical self-compassion, including his album Komorebi and book Lyrical Dharma. Discussing how he’s meeting the current moment, Ofosu describes shifting emotions—sadness, rage, hope—and frames them within a Buddhist view of relative and absolute reality and the “great freedom” of experience, which helps him avoid despair and return to equanimity. He explains self-compassion as cultivating a “wise friend inside,” which was slowly developed while dealing with OCD and depression, with the help of therapy & medication, and overcoming cultural stigma. For engaged practice, he focuses on making contemplative art and encouraging self-love, and he highlights hope in authentic self-expression, allyship, and intergenerational community. He shares upcoming Hip Hop Sound Bath tour dates and the inaugural Neurospicy Retreat with Jeff Warren, and closes with a brief self-compassion meditation practice. Listen now on Apple Podcast and Spotify Timestamp: 00:00 Welcome & Guest Intro 03:21 Great Freedom Explained 06:47 Self Compassion Practices 11:29 Building the Inner Friend 12:12 OCD and Healing Tools 19:11 Engaged Practice Through Art & Community 24:19 Hope in Community 29:01 Upcoming Tour and Neurospicy Retreat 31:36 Guided Self Compassion Practice 35:19 Gratitude and Closing Find more podcast episodes. Find this episode’s transcript here. Resources: Booking a free coaching discovery call with Ying, an award winning ADHD coach & meditation teacher featured on Self Magazine Download a free ADHD emotional regulation menu Guest’s Bio:  Born I / Ofosu Jones-Quartey is a meditation teacher, hip hop artist and author whose work sits at the intersection of music, mindfulness, and radical self-compassion. As a teacher was more than two decades of practice. He blends mindfulness with contemporary creative expression to make inner healing accessible to all. His latest projects include the contemplative hiphop album, Komorebi, and the book Lyrical Dharma, Hip-Hop as Mindfulness. Across retreats, performances, and community gatherings, Born I supports people in remembering their inherent worth and living with presence and courage. Find Ofosu on Instagram @bornimusic Check out the Neurospicy retreat happening in July 2026, led by Ofosu and Jeff Warren Check out Ofosu’s book, album, and upcoming tours here.

Host Ying Deng launches a mini-series on “how do we face this moment?” and interviews Ash Lounsbury, an ecopsychologist and enrolled citizen of the Osage Nation with ecotherapy training, meditation experience, and research on bird divination. Ash describes holding spring’s renewal alongside political and climate “polycrises,” reflects on privilege, neurodivergence, and “autistic joy,” and explains ecopsychology as the study of human relationships with nature (humans are nature). They discuss sustaining practices like sangha/community, small nature-connection rituals (sunrise, birdsong), and Ash’s bird divination workshops as meaning-making. Ash shares examples of collective action and resistance in Asheville (protests for protecting the urban forest, opposition to data centers & surveillance cameras, mutual aid) and leads a “sphere of influence” practice at the end centered on the inquiry: “How can I sustain my wave of change?” Listen now on Apple Podcast and Spotify 00:00 Welcome 00:38 Meet Ash Lounsbury 05:32 What Is Ecopsychology 06:57 Nature as Daily Practice 08:20 Sustaining Practices and Community 10:28 Bird Divination Explained 14:10 Service and Collective Action 18:30 Hope and Resistance Stories 21:31 Sphere of Influence Practice 28:57 Final Quote and Where to Find Ash Find more podcast episodes. Find this episode’s transcript here. Resources: Download a free ADHD emotional regulation menu Booking a free coaching discovery call with Ying, an award winning ADHD coach & meditation teacher featured on Self Magazine Guest’s Bio: Ash Lounsbury is an ecopsychologist and enrolled citizen of the Wahzhazhe (Osage) Nation. Ash holds a non-clinical Master’s in Ecopsychology from Naropa University and Level 1 and 2 certificates in ecotherapy from the Earthbody Institute. Her graduate research culminated in a dissertation on the intersection of ancient bird divination and contemporary ecotherapeutic modalities. Ash sometimes writes about myth, ecohealing, queerness, and birds.With over a decade of meditation experience, she’s had the honor to support Tara Brach and Jack Kornfield’s virtual meditation community members. In 2025, she co-founded Earthwild Ecology Club where she co-facilitates virtual ecopsychological workshops. Wake! Ecohealing  https://wakeecohealing.com/ Earthwild Ecology Club https://www.earthwildec.org/ IG: @wake.ecohealing

Ever feel like ADHD advice is just an endless list of productivity hacks that never quite address why everything still feels hard? That’s because most frameworks focus narrowly on attention and task completion—missing the full picture of what it’s actually like to live in an ADHD brain. In this episode, award-winning ADHD coach and meditation teacher Ying proposes a different lens: ADHD as an ecosystem. Drawing from her environmental science background and coaching hundreds of ADHD adults, she maps five interconnected dimensions—cognition, emotion, somatics, narrative, and execution—all embedded within larger systems of relationships, work, culture, and time/space. This isn’t a research paper or universal ADHD experience; it’s a multidimensional model that sees you as a whole person, not just a collection of executive function deficits to manage. The five dimensions: 03:48 Emotion — Intense highs and lows, deep empathy and attunement, rejection sensitivity shaped by lifelong negative feedback. Emotional regulation isn’t optional; it’s foundational. 04:50 Cognition — Out-of-the-box thinking through unexpected associations, interest-based attention that enables hyperfocus, and the “carrot bunch” effect: pulling one task reveals an interconnected web of related tasks, creating both creative insight and potential overwhelm. 06:41 Somatics — Sensory sensitivities to light, scent, taste; emotions showing up as body signals (tense neck, heat in chest, cold hands) before words arrive. Movement, food, breathing, and meditation become essential tools for regulation. 09:00 Narrative — The stories we tell ourselves about rejection, routine, success, and identity. Shaped by years of feedback, these narratives can be deliberately reframed through mindfulness and behavioral experiments—like shifting “routines are boring” to “routines are how I cultivate secure attachment with myself.” 13:16 Execution — Challenges with starting and finishing, but sustained motion in between. The wrapping-up phase suffers when novelty wanes. Project rotation keeps each one feeling fresh by cycling through multiple interests. 14:46 Systems — Personal routines, relationship structures (monthly deep-dive friendship calls instead of constant small talk), work environments (neurodivergent managers, autonomy, direct communication), cultural expectations, economic structures. Most systems are built for neurotypical brains; understanding this changes what you optimize for. 18:43 Why this matters: Tips and tools can only get you so far. They help you manage what’s on your plate, but without examining system-level issues, ADHD management always feels like an uphill battle. Ying’s approach: change the outer environment to work with your ADHD brain instead of forcing yourself into neurotypical systems while managing the emotional fallout. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing everything “right” but still struggling, this framework might help you design a life that actually matches your brain’s natural way of operating—not someone else’s. 20:30 Other frameworks: Russell Barkley’s executive inhibition model, dopamine and reward system approaches, and interest-based nervous system perspectives offer complementary scientific lenses. Listen now on Apple Podcast, Spotify and Youtube. Click here for podcast episodes. Resources: Booking a free coaching discovery call with Ying, an award winning ADHD coach & meditation teacher featured on Self Magazine Download a free ADHD emotional regulation menu Check out more podcast episodes Check out this podcast episode’s transcript To Learn More: The Creativity of ADHD from Scientific American https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-creativity-of-adhd/ Russell Barkley’s executive inhibition model https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/9000892/ Evaluating Dopamine Reward Pathway in ADHD https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2958516/ ADHD & the Interest-Based Nervous System https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-brain-chemistry-video/?srsltid=AfmBOooXLZLjGKdoPK5ig8hu4CReic5ULg6QzMuVHjL_aDD5lu_efgXM

Ever feel like mainstream success advice – wake up at 4am, run marathons, host constantly – sounds exhausting? That’s because it’s most likely provided by people with endless physical energy. In this episode, award-winning ADHD coach and meditation teacher, Ying shares the concept of overexcitability from Polish psychologist Dabrowski’s theory of positive disintegration, exploring five categories of overexcitability/intensity needs: psychomotor, sensual, intellectual, imaginational, and emotional. For many late-diagnosed ADHD adults, especially those who experience the world with vivid depth, understanding which needs actually sustain you (versus which ones hit diminishing returns) changes everything. Ying shares her own discovery that she’s “Type B ambitious”: deeply driven to grow, learn, and contribute, but without that relentless physical energy the success culture glorifies. Through personal reflections on relating, travel, social media use, and how she structures her time, Ying explores how her intellectual overexcitability (that thirst for knowledge) is actually the foundation of what counts as bonding, novelty, and fulfillment for her. If you’ve ever felt like you’re ambitious but don’t fit the hustle culture mold, this framework might help you design a life that actually matches your brain’s natural way of operating, not someone else’s. 00:00 intro and update 01:45 what is overexcitability 06:10 rethinking how I met my needs 08:47 type B ambitious, ambitious without the psychomotor overexcitability 12:02 my coaching philosphy: accomplish more by doing less 13:40 intuition need important but not included in the overexcitability model 14:53 rethinking how I structure my weekends, evening, travel 16:02 novelty needs, which one doesn’t have diminishing marginal return 19:08 what needs am I trying to satisfy on social media 20:59 summary Listen now on Apple Podcast, Spotify and Youtube. Click here for podcast episodes. Resources: Booking a free coaching discovery call with Ying, an award winning ADHD coach & meditation teacher featured on Self Magazine Download a free ADHD emotional regulation menu Check out more podcast episodes Check out this podcast episode’s transcript To learn more about Dabrowski’s theory, check out:Dabrowski Center’s podcast episode on Overexcitabilities and Dabrowski’s theory. Book recommendation: Living with Intensity Another podcast episode ‘Meeting Intensity Needs’ from AuDHD Flourishing, which partially inspired this podcast episode of my own.

Join meditation teacher and ADHD coach Ying, aka me, for a grounding mindfulness practice that uses nature as your anchor. This gentle, sensory-rich meditation is perfect for ADHD brains seeking a concrete way to experience and practice non-judgmental awareness. I first learnt this practice from my good friend, also a great meditation teacher, Lisa Pedscalny. What You’ll Need:Any natural object (rock, leaf, flower, pinecone, feather, etc.)Or simply use your hands if no natural object is available What You’ll Experience:Explore mindfulness through sight, touch, and physical sensationPractice radical acceptance using nature as your guideLearn to observe without judgment – the essence of mindfulnessEnd with the beautiful poem “Wild Geese” by Mary Oliver This practice adapts traditional mindfulness techniques to be more accessible for neurodivergent minds by providing tangible focus points and multi-sensory engagement. Whether you’re new to meditation or looking for ADHD-friendly practices, this guided session offers a peaceful way to connect with the present moment. Timemark:00:00 Intro to the Practice01:03 Guided Meditation Perfect for:✨ ADHD brains seeking concrete meditation anchors✨ Anyone wanting to connect with nature mindfully✨ Those struggling with traditional “empty mind” meditation✨ Building self-acceptance and non-judgmental awareness 💚 If this practice resonates with you, please share it with someone who might benefit and subscribe for more ADHD-friendly meditation content! Remember: There’s no “perfect” way to meditate – just your way. You belong in the family of things. 🦆 More from Ying:→ Book a coaching discovery call with me, exploring mindful, strategic, and multi-dimensional coaching designed to help you accomplish more by doing less: https://calendly.com/ying21/discovery→ ADHD-friendly digital tools: https://adhdasiangirl.com/product-category/tools/→ Join my newsletter: https://adhdasiangirl.substack.com