Codependency & The Mother Wound with Alyssa Zander

Reclaiming Your Identity & Relishing in Your Weird with Lisa Petrik What happens when the experiences that once shaped your identity become the very things you must unravel to discover who you truly are? In this deeply personal conversation, I sit down with Lisa Petrik, identity coach, author, and hypnotherapist, to explore the subconscious programming, childhood wounds, relational patterns, and life experiences that influence how we show up in love, intimacy, and relationships. Lisa shares her unconventional journey into hypnotherapy, including her struggles with celiac disease, disordered eating, and the early experiences that shaped her sense of worth and belonging. We explore how childhood conditioning and the relationships modeled by our parents can follow us into adulthood, influencing everything from people-pleasing and seeking external validation to the ways we navigate romantic relationships. We also venture into more vulnerable territory, discussing sexual trauma, shame, and Lisa's experience with celibacy as a pathway to reclaiming her power, rebuilding trust in her body's wisdom, and developing deeper discernment around intimacy. Following profound personal losses, including the deaths of her mother and brother, Lisa shares how grief became a catalyst for sobriety, spiritual awakening, and a radically different relationship with herself and life. Our conversation also explores masculine and feminine dynamics, attachment styles, self pleasure, sex magic, celibacy, ADHD, Cornell 7 and SA, plant medicine journeys, the emotional conditioning men experience, the cock-heart connection and ultimately why vulnerability, emotional availability, and leading with the heart are essential ingredients for deeper connection. At the heart of Lisa's work is a powerful invitation: stop outsourcing your identity, happiness, and sense of worth to other people. Rather than remaining defined by our wounds or circumstances, we have the capacity to alchemize our experiences into opportunities for growth, self-awareness, and expanded consciousness.

What does it look like to put female pleasure at the center of female wellness? In this episode of Universal Intimacy, guest host Meleza Morris sits down with Kim Aviv and Ada Trujillo, founders of Mila, to explore the evolving landscape of female intimacy and the movement toward more intentional, pleasure-centered wellness.Together, they discuss the importance of prioritizing women's pleasure, challenging the narratives that have historically sidelined female desire, and raising the standard for the products women use to care for their intimate well-being. With a commitment to high-quality ingredients and thoughtful formulation, Mila is helping reimagine what feminine wellness can look and feel like.This conversation explores the intersection of intimacy, innovation, and empowerment—and what becomes possible when women's pleasure is treated not as an afterthought, but as an essential part of well-being.Mila brings skincare and K-beauty's design sensibility to intimate wellness – a category untouched by innovation for 15+ years. Kim and Ada are making it aspirational, routine, and no longer taboo, with clinically premium ingredients and elevated, ritual-driven products. Kim Aviv is co-founder of Mila, bringing skincare and K-beauty's design sensibility to intimate wellness. Her path wasn't linear: from ballet to Cambridge on scholarship, then finance and technology, including serving as COO of a fintech company that scaled to roughly $4.5 billion in assets under management, with a common thread of solving problems others had given up on. Israeli-born and Cambridge-educated, Kim's mission with Mila is to restart the conversation around intimate care entirely. Ada Trujillo, Spanish-born and raised, was a Division I and professional basketball player before moving into consumer branding, most recently leading brand and marketing at waterdrop Microdrinks after Microsoft. As a longtime consumer in the category, she never understood why intimate wellness lagged behind beauty, skincare, and F&B in ingredients, design, and experience – a question that became conviction, then Mila, where she now applies her expertise in consumer branding and DTC growth to make intimate care aspirational and no longer taboo.Mila:⁠ https://heymila.co/⁠ Meleza Morris is a Miami-based bilingual relationship professional, certified intimacy coordinator, and event facilitator dedicated to creating safe, meaningful human connection. Recognized by SAG-AFTRA through the Intimacy Professionals Association, she has coordinated intimacy for film and television with empathy, professionalism, and consent at the forefront. Trained at the William Esper Studio, she brings expertise in LGBTQ+ communities, non-monogamy, and diverse relationship dynamics. With over a decade of experience across luxury hospitality, live events, and transformational experiences, she excels at designing spaces where people feel seen and supported. Her work blends emotional intelligence, clear boundaries, and compassionate leadership. Meleza's grounded presence helps create the trust and safety needed for genuine connection and personal growth.Meleza can be found at: ⁠https://anomale.love/

In Episode 30 of Universal Intimacy, professional photographer and exploratory psychonaut Matt Kosterman shares the deeply personal journey that took him from a seemingly traditional life of marriage, fatherhood, and business success into a profound unraveling of everything he thought he knew about himself. Following the birth of his oldest daughter, Matt began questioning the choices and patterns that had shaped his life. What followed was a period of tremendous upheaval—including divorce, foreclosure, bankruptcy, estrangement from his family of origin, and a growing realization that beneath his external success was a profound lack of personal intimacy. He describes being disconnected from his own emotional life and, ultimately, from himself. That unraveling became the catalyst for a journey of exploration, healing and self-discovery. Matt takes us through the modalities that helped him begin turning toward the places he had spent much of his life avoiding—from experiential treatment at The Meadows, where he explored codependency and the inner child, to Landmark Forum and a wide-ranging exploration of psychedelics and plant medicine, including mushrooms, MDMA, ayahuasca, 5-MeO-DMT to Tantra and somatics. Beneath all of these modalities was a deeper lesson: healing isn't simply about understanding yourself intellectually. It's about becoming embodied enough to actually feel yourself. Matt shares how unresolved emotional experiences began revealing themselves through his physical body, including frozen shoulder and pelvic pain, and how somatic practices and dearmoring helped him begin accessing and releasing tension, emotion, and protective patterns that had been held beneath conscious awareness. The conversation also explores the role of community and witnessing in transformation. Rather than healing in isolation, we begin to discover ourselves through relationship—with our bodies, our communities, and the people willing to walk alongside us. Ultimately, this episode isn't about psychedelics as an escape from ordinary life. It's about what happens when we use profound experiences as doorways—and then do the much harder work of bringing what we've discovered back into our 3D reality. In this episode, we explore: The unraveling of a traditional definition of success Divorce, bankruptcy, foreclosure, and the identity crisis that followed Codependency, the inner child, and confronting childhood patterns How therapy and alternative healing modalities opened new pathways of self-discovery Psychedelics and plant medicine as tools for exploring trauma and the unconscious Somatic awareness and learning to listen to the body's intelligence Dearmoring and the relationship between physical tension and emotional experience Why community and witnessing can be essential to integration This is a conversation about what happens when the structures of our lives fall away—and we finally become curious about the person underneath them! https://mattkosterman.com/

How does your nervous system affect intimacy, trust, vulnerability, and the way you connect with others? In this episode of Universal Intimacy, Josephine Lauer sits down with Anat Peri, Inner Child Expert, somatic healing practitioner, TEDx speaker, and founder of Training Camp for the Soul®, for a powerful conversation about nervous system regulation, inner child healing, somatic healing, and relationship patterns. Our childhood experiences can shape how we respond to intimacy, vulnerability, conflict, trust, and emotional connection as adults. But understanding these patterns intellectually isn't always enough. Anat explores what happens when we begin working with the body and nervous system, allowing emotions and sensations to be experienced rather than simply analyzed. Through her TCS Method™, Anat brings together somatics, emotional intelligence, nervous system regulation, and inner child reparenting to help people recognize patterns of self-abandonment and develop a deeper relationship with themselves.  🎙️ Guest: Anat Peri Inner Child Expert | Somatic Healing Practitioner | TEDx Speaker Founder of Training Camp for the Soul® Learn more about Anat Peri: www.trainingcampforthesoul.com

Josephine sits down with relationship coach and founder of Codependency Alchemy, Alyssa Zander, for a deeply honest conversation about the patterns that shape how we love, relate, attach, and abandon ourselves. Together, they explore codependency beyond its traditional definition—including the ways we learn to outsource our worth to relationships, achievement, validation, and being needed. Alyssa unpacks the mother wound and how unmet childhood needs for safety, protection, and attunement can follow us into adult relationships. They dive into inner child and shadow work, somatic healing, boundaries, sovereignty, and the often-codependent impulse to “fix” or coach our partners. Because healing isn't about getting someone else to change. It’s about learning to become a safe, sovereign home for yourself—and reclaiming the parts of you that were once abandoned, judged, or hidden away. A conversation about codependency, the mother wound, relational responsibility, and the radical intimacy of coming home to yourself. Alyssa Zander is a relationship coach, speaker, and the creator of Codependency Alchemy, an online community helping thousands of people heal codependency, anxious attachment, and relationship patterns through shadow work and inner child healing. Her work has reached millions through social media, her top-ranked podcast, and her writing on Substack, where she helps people build healthier relationships by first changing the relationship they have with themselves. Alyssa soul's mission is to heal the mother wound, and to share practical ways for us all to bring compassion to the parts of us we judge. website: https://www.codependencyalchemy.com 

In this episode of Universal Intimacy, Josephine sits down with Temple of Loha team members Hayleigh and Lauren for an intimate, candid conversation about anxiety, trauma, sobriety, spirituality, somatic healing, dating, and the messy, beautiful process of becoming more fully ourselves. Together, they unpack the ways women can seek external validation through relationships, substances, achievement, and being desired. They explore reparenting the inner child, creating boundaries, and learning to become a secure and trustworthy home for themselves. The conversation turns toward modern dating culture, including the strange psychology of dating apps and the ways they can become more about entertainment, validation, or distraction than genuine connection. They explore the idea of “creationships”—relationships rooted in self-sovereignty, spaciousness, and conscious co-creation rather than traditional relationship scripts. Josephine also opens up about the collaborative culture inside Temple of Loha: what it means to create a professional container where people are encouraged to grow, speak honestly, hold boundaries, and become more embodied versions of themselves. This is girl talk with depth—a conversation about the uncomfortable, hilarious, liberating work of becoming a woman who no longer needs to abandon herself to be loved. 

Can Human Design help you discover who you truly are beneath conditioning? In this thought-provoking episode of Universal Intimacy, Josephine Lauer sits down with Elton Anderson Jr. (L10)—Human Design educator, speaker, former celebrity photographer, and conscious leadership mentor—to explore how Human Design becomes a powerful tool for self-discovery, spiritual awakening, authentic living, and personal transformation. After surviving a near-death experience while traveling abroad, Elton's life changed forever. His journey led him beyond external success and into a profound exploration of identity, purpose, consciousness, Human Design, and authentic self-expression. Together, Josephine and Elton discuss how Human Design goes far beyond personality typing. Instead, it offers a roadmap for understanding your energetic blueprint, breaking free from cultural conditioning, and living in deeper alignment with your true nature. 

In this deeply nourishing and soul-expanding conversation, Josephine Lauer sits down with intimacy guide, author, and intuitive teacher Shezza Sheryl, also known as The Intimacy Oracle, to explore how astrology can become a powerful map for understanding love, relationships, desire, and our deepest longings. Together they unpack why the relationships we crave often mirror our greatest opportunities for growth, healing, and embodiment. They explore the sacred role of longing, why suffering can become a catalyst for transformation rather than something to avoid, and how cultivating genuine self-love creates the foundation for conscious partnership. Josephine and Shezza also discuss the often-misunderstood practice of celibacy—not as deprivation, but as a potent season of devotion, self-discovery, and energetic refinement that can radically transform how we relate to intimacy. One of the most captivating moments of the episode unfolds as Shezza offers Josephine a live Intimacy Oracle Reading, intuitively weaving astrology, energetic insight, and spiritual guidance to illuminate what is unfolding in Josephine's love life in real time. Whether you're navigating dating, healing from heartbreak, calling in partnership, or simply seeking a deeper relationship with yourself, this reading offers wisdom that extends far beyond one person's story. In this episode, you'll discover: How astrology can illuminate your relationship patterns and romantic journey. Why longing isn't something to fix—but something to listen to. The transformational gifts hidden within suffering. The difference between self-love as a concept and self-love as an embodied practice. How intentional celibacy can deepen intimacy with yourself and future partners. A live Intimacy Oracle Reading revealing intuitive guidance for Josephine's love life. Shezza Sheryl is the author of Sexy New Earth and creator of the Divine & Alive Tantra course, blending astrology, intuition, Tantra, and embodied wisdom to help people awaken to love from the inside out. If you've ever wondered whether the universe is trying to tell you something about your love life, this episode offers a beautiful invitation to listen. Learn more about Shezza Sheryl, her work, and her offerings at https://shezzasheryl.love/.

This video presents a first! A Sym-podcast, a fusion of a podcast with a Symposium, an ancient Greco-Roman practice of oratory arts and rhetoric; individuals with various opinions gathering together to discuss a theme they are passionate about. And of course we are here to discuss the theme of Eros! The participants, who include an intimacy coach, a bard, a scientist, a psychic/astrologer, a theater director and a somatic practitioner, a community organizer and Josephine, engage in a collective dialogue to examine how desire and erotic life force move humanity.   The Symposium Tradition • Definition: The symposium is described as a gathering of loved ones who speak from the heart about topics they have studied and deeply care about. • Purpose: It functions as a way to engage constructively and share diverse ideas, countering the divisiveness of modern "us versus them" culture. • Feminine Inclusion: The group highlights the historical role of the hetaira (educated courtesan) in hosting such gatherings and aims to rewrite history by centering the feminine perspective.   Key Themes The Nature of Eros: Eros is discussed as afundamental, elusive, and powerful connective force in the universe, originating from chaos in ancient myth. Repression and Embodiment:Several participants note that modern society often represses erotic life force, leaving individuals numb and disconnected from their own desires. Self-Love: The practice of self-love is presented asthe cultivation of "filling one's own cup," enabling individuals to move past longing and instead offer their authentic selves to the world. The Role of Ritual and Science: how ritual, somaticwork, and conscious movement help individuals traverse discomfort, heal past trauma, and reawaken their bodies. The scientific perspective provides aframework for understanding neurochemistry, such as the role of oxytocin and vasopressin in human pair-bonding and social behaviors. Technology: The group reflects on the paradox oftechnology, noting that while virtual reality and digital tools can be "nauseating" or toxic, they also serve as mirrors that can offer insight into intersubjective reality. The conversation concludes with a shared sentiment that by utilizing diverse tools—myth, ritual, science, and community connection—individuals can chart their own paths, reclaim their humanity, and live in greater alignment with their desires.  

Josephine sits down with teacher, facilitator, and guide Dawn Cherie to explore the intersection of sacred intimacy, aging, caring for elderly parents, death and the evolution of modern love. Together, we unpack what it truly means to expand the capacity of the heart and why relationships remain one of our greatest paths for spiritual growth. Dawn shares profound insights on what prevents many of us from experiencing the depth of connection we long for, how to find the relationships that are truly right for us, and why sacredness is often found in the subtle moments we overlook. We also dive into topics rarely discussed with honesty and reverence: menopause, perimenopause, wise womanhood, caregiving, and the cultural narratives surrounding aging. Dawn offers a refreshing perspective on how prayer, tantra, devotion, and intimacy can become powerful practices for cultivating vitality, purpose, and aliveness throughout every stage of life. Drawing from her decades of work in sacred relationship, ritual, movement, and transformational facilitation, Dawn invites us into a new blueprint—one that honors love, embodiment, wisdom, and the sacred nature of being human. In this episode, we explore: • Why relationships are a path of spiritual awakening • What limits our capacity for love and intimacy • The subtle nature of sacredness and devotion • Prayer, tantra, and the "anti-aging" secret to vitality • Menopause, perimenopause, and reclaiming wise womanhood • Caregiving, loss, and life's unexpected initiations • The evolving dynamics between men and women today • Creating a new blueprint for conscious relationships • Why intimacy work matters now more than ever   This conversation is an invitation to live more fully, love more deeply, and remember the sacredness woven through every stage of life.