S6, Ep 10: SMBC with a known donor, Ashley Coates

In this episode, we discuss:The pressures women often feel to fit men into their lives to fulfill societal expectationJamela’s decision to pursue solo motherhood after her divorce at 37;How her mom played an active role in her decision to become a solo mom by choice;The emotional journey of mourning both her marriage and the traditional family dream;The challenges and rewards of being a single mother in African American culture;Her fierce advocacy for herself in the fertility process and how important it is to ask questions;How she leaned into her faith and her community when the path was challenging;The importance of prioritizing your self care and your own happiness, even as a mom of newborn twins;The biggest benefit of being a solo mom according to Jamela;And more!Connect with Jamela on Instagram  👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.

Born and raised in a close-knit Michigan community, Whitney always knew she wanted to be a mom. But after years of dating and only one long-term relationship in her 20s, she found herself single at 34. Instead of waiting for the "perfect" time or partner, she took control of her fertility and started her journey to solo motherhood. Through IVF, multiple rounds of retrievals and transfers, and unwavering determination, Whitney welcomed her son into the world.In this episode, Whitney opens up about the emotional and physical challenges of her fertility journey, how Instagram helped her connect with other women going through similar experiences, and how she's embraced life as a solo mom. She also sheds light on how she’s continued to follow her own professional dreams and passions, even as she’s parenting solo.Whitney’s story is a powerful reminder that when it comes to following your dreams—especially the dream of motherhood, sometimes the time is now. If you’ve ever found yourself wondering, “What am I waiting for?” this episode will resonate deeply with you.In this episode, Whitney shares:Why she decided to pursue motherhood on her own and what led to her 'aha' moment;The reactions from her family and how they supported her decision to be a solo mom;Her IVF journey: the reality of four retrievals and three transfers before achieving a successful pregnancy;The role social media played in connecting her with other solo moms and women navigating fertility;How she handled the societal responses to her pregnancy as a single woman;The joy and fulfillment she experiences now as a mom to a 1.5-year-old son;Her transition into motherhood and postpartum life;How she launched her company iWellness Center as founder and CEO.You can connect with Whitney on Instagram @wjfoley and check out her business at www.iwellnesscenter.org. 👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.

In this episode, Virginia shares:How a surprise pregnancy and subsequent miscarriage reignited her desire to have another child, this time as a single mom by choice;The reactions she received from family and friends when she chose to pursue motherhood on her own;Why she traveled from Canada to the USA for her fertility process and the factors that influenced her choice of a donor;Her experience with IUI and the challenges she faced during her pregnancy, from intense morning sickness to balancing running a business and pregnancy;The importance of creating a nurturing space as a solo parent and how she applies Feng Shui principles to her own home;The experience of connecting with other families who used the same donor and what this could mean for her child in the future.Resources mentioned in this episode:Ellis Kelly Interior Alchemy (Ginny's business, alongside her sister Natalie)October 7 Nursery Design Workshop with Virginia Drader & The Single Greatest Choice 👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.

Valerie Bauman, is an investigative reporter for Newsweek, solo mother by choice, and author of one of my favorite memoirs in the solo moms space, Inconceivable:Super Sperm Donors, Off-the-Grid Insemination, and Unconventional Family Planning. I devoured Valerie’s book during a 30-hour airport layover, and by the time I finished, I felt like I had spent the day with her, getting to know her as a friend.We dive deep into Valerie’s journey, from her experience considering sperm banks or a close friend to ultimately finding a known donor on Facebook. She openly discusses the emotional challenges of navigating this path, including a heartbreaking miscarriage, before welcoming her now 3.5-month-old baby boy. Valerie's story is a testament to the resilience and strength of women who, as she puts it, "intentionally build what they want."Our conversation also touches on important topics such as the bioethics of the sperm donation industry, the anxiety that often accompanies pregnancy, and making empowered choices as a mother. If you’ve ever felt torn between the life you want and societal expectations, this episode will resonate deeply.In this episode, we discuss:Valerie’s decision to become a mom during the pandemic and what sparked her journey;Navigating the sperm donor process and finding a donor on Facebook;The shift from considering traditional sperm banks to seeking a known donor;Her miscarriage and the emotional toll of almost accepting life without motherhood;Anxiety during pregnancy and the struggle of waiting for the other shoe to drop;The power of creating the life you want as a woman—regardless of societal norms;Bioethics in the sperm donation industry and the need for better regulation;And more!👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips. 👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.

In this episode on the mating gap and egg freezing, we discuss:The challenges created by the shortage of eligible, educated men.How the education gap between men and women affects dating dynamics.How societal expectations and outdated gender norms are contributing to this issue.Why considering partners from diverse educational backgrounds can be beneficial.The psychological benefits of egg freezing for single women.How women are making empowered choices about their reproductive futures.Marcia's insights reveal the unique struggles women face today and offer a fresh perspective on how assisted reproductive technologies are changing the landscape of motherhood. Tune in to hear more about her study, the concept of the "mating gap," and why so many women are rethinking what it means to have it all.For full show notes, visit www.singlegreatestchoice.com/podcast-feed/s7-ep1-marcia-inhorn-motherhood-on-ice 👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.

My final guest of this season is Ashley Coates, a longtime Instagram friend and solo mom by choice living in Portland, Oregon. When Ashley decided to pursue solo motherhood, she decided to ask a close friend to be her known donor. What happened next feels almost too good to be true. Tune in as Ashley shares her experience of navigating conception, pregnancy and birth with a known donor and the unexpected joy of extending her family from coast to coast. 👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.

We discuss more about…..The transition from corporate life to focusing on solo motherhood.The joys and challenges of parenting during a global pandemic.Her mother’s health crisis and its impact on her responsibilities.The process of writing her book featuring stories of 20 Australian SMBCs.Strategies for achieving a better work/life balance.Prioritizing experiences over material luxuries.Tips and wisdom for other women considering the solo motherhood path.This episode is a must-listen for anyone considering or already on the path to becoming a solo mom by choice. And if you missed her previous episodes on the SGC Podcast, make sure you tune into those by using the links below!Connect with Alisha!Follow her on social media! Website | Podcast | @solomumsociety  | @noneedforprincecharmingLearn more and check out her latest book HERE Mentioned ResourcesS1, Ep 14: No Need for Prince Charming with Alisha BurnsS4, Ep 3: Books For Your Child's BookshelfYour Dream Life Starts Here by Kristina Karlsson 👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.

We discuss more about…..Elizabeth’s journey to fostering and adoption.Balancing professional life with motherhood.The emotional and logistical challenges of fostering.dating and introducing our children to a future partner.Building and relying on a support system.Insights and advice for those considering fostering or adoption.Connect with Elizabeth!Website | Instagram | Instant Mom PodcastCheck out the Central General Store!Website | InstagramLearn more about the SGC Childbirth 101 Class for solo moms!  👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.

We discuss more about…..Emily's initial adoption research and the steps involved in the process.The emotional journey and uncertainties of getting matched.The costs and logistical aspects of adopting in the U.S.Adjusting to motherhood and balancing work with childcare.The importance of support and strong friendships in solo motherhood.  👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.

We discuss more about…..Celine's transition into embracing single motherhood.The challenges and emotional journey of egg retrieval and embryo transfer.Moving from the Netherlands to Sedona, and eventually to New York City.The vital role of community and support for SMBCs.Balancing business and motherhood, and the importance of surrounding oneself with supportive influences.Celine’s birth and postpartum experience. Connect with Celine!Follow her on social media! Instagram | Website | Media More info about coaching and community groups at  www.singlegreatestchoice.com/coaching 👩‍👧‍👦The Single Greatest Choice is here to support you in every stage of your SMBC journey through  1:1 coaching, community groups, group coaching and workshops, and retreats and SMBC family trips.