Nick Wright Doesn't Care How We Make The Cake | Hour 1

"Like a hobo on a ham sandwich." JuJu has a Stat of the Day, a sound bite from an old-school Senator, and an update on The Polls. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I don't remember what day it was, but it was whatever day you said there were no black people on NFL broadcasts." After he tells us a cringeworthy story about a fight with his wife over the 'cleaning girl,' Zas explains his new feud with Cam Newton. Plus, the crew goes to The Bucket for the first time this season, Tua sings karaoke, and Greg does what he can to recall what's on his own podcast this week. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I'm gonna say it's child abuse, but not for the reason you think." John Talty wrote the new book on Lane Kiffin, 'Lane Being Lane,' and shares details about Lane's constant chase, his image rehab, and the powerful people pushing narratives around him. Plus, a new game called "Awesome or Child Abuse" and Denny Hamlin calling out an unersious organization. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Show me your pack." Nick with a hard K is ecstatic that Dan is finally willing to stop congratulating himself for Pablo's work on the Clippers story and talk about nothing but football, so, naturally, Dan spends 25 minutes asking Nick why he's not interested in the Clippers story. Also, beads on chairs, QBs and race, and Greg Cote's 4th and 3rd phrases from his Top 75 Catchphrases. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I've always wanted to be roofied." Dabo Swinney keeps putting his foot in his mouth, Greg Cote is ecstatic that the Americans are succeeding at the U.S. Open, David relives a stutter from yesterday, Zaslow is mind-blown by the spread for Miami at Clemson several weeks from now, and Dan apologizes to Ricardo Montalban. Today's cast: Dan, Greg, David, Roy, Chris, Mike, and Zaslow. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Kyle Shanahan, you don't even know what day it is." Our picks are in for the first Against the Spread of the NFL season. Dan shares his thoughts on The Athletic finding no bias in Dianna Russini's reporting about Mike Vrabel, JuJu reveals his Top 5 Cheaters in Sports History That He Can Think Of, and we unveil the winners for the 2026 Suey Awards! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Does it smell like a cheap baby?" Funniest Thing from the Sports Weekend is back, Jack! Nothing this weekend made us laugh, grimace, and send shivers down our spine more than this trailer for the Nathan Fielder-made documentary about Elizabeth Holmes. Amin joins us to weigh in and share his Weekend Observations, which include his thoughts on college football, how he found out the Chicago White Sox were good this year, and his anger over influencers attempting to overtake the US Open. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"David doesn't make the rules of Judaism." With the dust settling a few days after the NBA handed out one of the biggest punishments in NBA history to the Los Angeles Clippers, the gang breaks down the reaction. Dan wonders whether Pablo would get more credit if he worked at a bigger outlet like ESPN, and whether Kawhi Leonard has hung Steve Balmer out to dry by not standing by him and accepting a settlement with the NBA. We also react to the absurdity of umpire Doug Eddings telling St Louis Cardinals pitcher Hancel Rincon not to wear his hat to the side. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Do you know what making a ruling with prejudice means?" According to Zaslow, it was not that great. He explains why the Week 1 slate of college football disappointed, despite crazy finishes in Auburn-Baylor and Michigan-Western Michigan. Is it unethical for bigger programs to start their season with glorified exhibitions against smaller programs? The NFL returns tomorrow, and Tua has been named the starter, but how long will that last? The gang also discusses whether Bill Belichick is on his way to getting fired at UNC and the interesting way David Samson eats French toast. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I ruined Shiva, alright. Get it right." Dan took too long to arrive at the Miami Hurricanes party last year, so he is making sure he is well ahead of it this year. After the Canes drubbed Stanford 45-6, Dan and the crew examine Malachi Toney's impact on the program and where his legacy could end up, how Darian Mensah compares to Carson Beck, and where expectations lie for Miami this season. David Samson returns today and joins us in the studio to tell us how Chris Cote and Roy ruined Shiva. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices