A Harrowing Monologue with Helen Bauer

It's a hilarious meander around the mind of Matthew Crosby this week, from the University lecturer he was obsessed with, to his first fight; which in turn frightened his colleagues at the library. Just brace yourself for the last segment of the podcast, because Tom's lucky dip 'first' contains details which the more sensitive listener may find disturbing (but also very funny!) You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy

What a smashing episode it is this week. Radio X presenter Toby Tarrant brought arm fulls of hilarious anecdotes, from baby sitting business cards to cruise ships full of obscure celebrities and even a very poorly judged, self administered haircut! Plus, Maisie & Tom dive into the lucky dip bucket for tales of gossip amongst the cleaners and a poorly judged message of affection scrawled on a school locker. You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy

When you hear what comedian Helen Bauer had for breakfast before this episode was recorded, the rest of it will make sense. You won't be prepared, but it will make a little more sense! How harrowing do you think a monologue at school in English and Drama can be? Listen in and find out!! You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy

They say that there's comedy in the most tragic of circumstances and Joanne's stories prove that this week. In an absolutely hilarious episode, Joanne talks Maisie & Tom through her experiences of young love and crucially, young loss. Brace yourself for first breakups, first kisses and so much more! You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy

That's A First goes international this week, linking up with London Hughes in Los Angeles! There are some absolutely cracking stories including her first stand up gig, her first house party and the story about the first moment she realised she was famous is UNBELIEVABLE! You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy

Representing the country as dancers, Love Island, Strictly, I'm A Celeb.... There's not a lot that the Pritchard brothers haven't given a go! Find out about their various firsts from wardrobe malfunctions to extreme brotherly violence. You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy

What a cracking episode this week. Vogue was more than happy to tell Maisie & Tom all about her first modelling jobs and the bizarre things she had to wear, as well as the things that her parents said she couldn't have as a kid, so she found elsewhere... (you'll never guess where she got chewing gum from!) You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy

Fabulous comedian, singer and impressionist Jess Robinson jumped onto the internet to talk to Maisie & Tom this week! THE voice of Melania Trump and many others from "Spitting Image" told all about dodgy art outside charity shops, unfortunate childhood snack requests and jammy job successes. You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy

I'll have the deer penis please... Said no one ever. Maisie & Tom caught up with The Hairy Bikers as they hunkered down in a hotel room in London and found out all about some of the more odd things they've eaten. Hear tales of childhood medical emergencies and live cooking show nightmares as the hirsute chef duo reveal all. You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy

If you have even a feint memory of the mid-2000s, this weeks episode is right up your alley. Beth Cornell (Litany) is from Harrogate, the same home town as Maisie. She was even in the same school year! Find out all the pitfalls of a Year 7 residential in Yorkshire and relive Litany's meeting with an anonymous, executive pillock from the music industry. You can follow Maisie & Tom! Twitter: @MaisieAdam & @tomlucy Instagram: @maisieadam & @tomjameslucy