SisterSmart Leadership podcast

42: The Cost of Emotional Labor

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Emotional labor at work is one of the biggest invisible barriers holding women leaders back, and most have never even named it.

As women in leadership, we often take on the invisible work of managing team emotions professionally: smoothing over conflicts, holding the team together, noticing what no one else does, and absorbing the stress of everyone around us. This invisible work takes real skill and real energy, but it rarely shows up in performance reviews or promotion conversations.

In this episode, we unpack why emotional labor falls so unevenly on women leaders, what it is really costing you in terms of energy, visibility, and career advancement, and exactly how to lead with warmth and still protect yourself from burnout.

You will also hear about a leader who was passed over for a VP role despite being the emotional backbone of her entire department, and how she shifted from carrying the load to leading sustainably without losing any of her warmth.

01:48 --- What emotional labor actually is and how it goes far beyond the original definition

04:12 --- How one leader was running two jobs and why she got passed over for VP

06:30 --- The three real costs of unmanaged emotional labor: energy depletion, visibility gaps, and burnout

09:15 --- Why you should not stop caring and how to lead strategically instead

11:24 --- Gender socialization and the double bind women face with emotional caretaking

12:45 --- Four practical moves to stop emotional labor from holding you back

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE

  1. Arlie Hochschild, The Managed Heart (1983) on emotional labor
  2. Google's Project Aristotle on psychological safety

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