Heart vs. Mind Dilemma: when to follow your heart and not your mind | 197

For many men, their introduction to personal development was the infamous “pickup community”. My friend “Worldwide Psychologist” Andreas and I speak on our experiences, good and bad, and how it led to deeper understandings in self-discovery. We also cover why we replay childhood relations, installing values into your kids, and why staying connected to yourself is important. 00:00 Discovering who you are 04:00 Discovering yourself through forums 06:45 Pick up community 08:00 Benefits of tinder 11:50 Healthy pickup coaching 13:00 Childhood trauma and healing 17:15 You have to abandon the game 21:15 Consistency and intensity pay off 25:55 Why is staying connected to yourself important 28:55 Installing values into your kids 34:50 What you emphasize is what your kids will aim to 40:45 Have more trust in yourself 45:55 You thrive during a process 46:40 Persistency in intensity

Higher consciousness through sex? If you've ever felt in an altered state from falling in love, taking MDMA, or really great sex, then you may have experienced what Timothy Leary called the “Neurosomatic Circuit”—the state of consciousness that comes with a deep connection between mind and body, typically through sustaining sexual arousal. This episode covers how sexual arousal can be used to enhance your emotional state, via lessons I learned intensively studying sexuality in my early 20s. Such as, why men need control of their urges, sexual dysfunctions and healing, how chronic tension effects on body, and tips on sustaining sexual arousal. 00:00 - Intro 02:00 - Arousal and consciousness 09:35 - Announcements 11:30 - 8 circuit model of consciousness 29:30 - Connection between mind and body 50:00 - Truth carries the most sensation 56:20 - Sustaining sexual arousal 01:03:15 - Anxiety and arousal 01:04:30 - Chronic tension effects on body 01:08:30 - Higher consciousness through sex

My friends Kris and Lily came back from a breakup to coming back together and now happily married with two kids. In order to do so, they both had to drastically change themselves and their reality. We discuss major turning points in a romantic relationship, balancing ideologies in a relationship, and some key (and possibly taboo) principles about how men and women can find deep harmony together. If you’re having relationship issues and you want to fix it, apply to Lead Your Family— small group program for men in committed relationships: https://www.ruwando.com/LYF Kris and Lily run a business together helping expats relocate to Thailand. https://cnxlocal.com/ 00:00 - From Modern to Traditional Relationship 06:50 - Turning points in a romantic relationship 15:00 - Why are rituals important for a relationship? 27:00 - Leaving your principles for a greater goal 37:00 - Learning how to surrender to your partner 43:00 - Balancing Ideologies in Relationships 49:00 - Shift in relationship dynamics 01:03:00 - Christian values of family and community 01:14:00 - Passing on your values to your kids

"A man's beauty represents inner functional truths: his face shows what he can do." (Albert Camus) Trauma (inhibitions to normal function) shows up in out nonverbal communication— facial expressions and posture. We can read one's emotions through their resting faces and micro-expressions. Here's how to read, and modify yours from trauma to ease and confidence. 00:00 - Intro 01:40 - Body language - first impressions 06:05 - A man's looks demonstrate what he can do 11:05 - How to understand trauma 18:40 - Your face mirrors your feelings 22:37 - Left side of face vs right 32:15 - The four circuits of consciousness 44:30 - Why you should have good physical awareness 49:25 - Tips on how to not contract 52:10 - The Inner Smile exercise 56:50 - Welcoming all the sensations 58:50 - How to control your tension

Why do you get nervous? Do you “choke” in important moments? i.e. Meeting someone you’re attracted to, public speaking, conflict or competition? How to “conquer your inner weakness” really comes down to how to change your stress response. The episode breaks down how to change your stress response. We’ll start with the biologically process of acute stress, and how to “practice right emotions” so the next time you’re faced with an important moment— in business, love, or life— you’ll have a winning response, rather than a self-sabotaging one. 00:00 - Intro 01:46 - Announcements 10:50 - Why do you get nervous? 15:55 - Steroid hormone stress 22:40 - Understanding your physiology 36:00 - Emotional distress vs. chronic stress 39:45 - The winner vs. the loser effect 45:45 - Practice right emotional response 1:05:00 - Why breathing calms your brain 1:08:50 - Recap

Mrs. Meepagala rejoins the pod after 100 episodes. (She was on ep100 before we had kids). We speak on power dynamics and imbalance in relationships, mother and father figure differences, the beauty of surrendered woman, and our personal experiences with “trad” gender roles. If you’re a man in a committed relationship that’s not going the way you want, you may want to join my small group program: https://www.ruwando.com/LYF 00:00 - Intro 00:43 - Motherhood and work during baby years 05:27 - Challenging part of becoming a parent 07:10 - Why is family support important during pregnancy? 10:55 - Beauty of surrendered woman 13:20 - Do young women understand hormonal cycle? 15:41 - Nuclear family and masculine values 20:45 - Power of surrendered state 33:48 - Intrinsic motivation vs proving yourself 38:14 - Choosing motherhood or entrepreneurship 44:10 - Male vs female competition and confidence 52:11 - Mother and father figure differences 59:28 - Finding ways to relax when parenting 1:03:28 - Power dynamics and imbalance in relationships

A few months ago the Economist wrote an article on the political gender gap— how men are becoming more conservative, and women more liberal. While this seems like a recipe for conflict, in many ways this is a return to human nature. This episode covers the evolutionary roots behind political leanings, the reasons for recent cultural shifts, and some fascinating studies about how your political leading may reveal itself in a brain scan. https://www.ruwando.com/LYF https://www.ruwando.com/archetype 00:00 - Intro: Cultural shift to left 3:20 - New Course: Lead Your Family 5:50 - Biological difference between liberal and conservative 14:40 - Biology behind liberal brain 18:15 - Karl Marx and Nietzsche 30:22 - Why is there a political gender gap? 37:17 - Why are young men more conservative? 01:02:59 - How to balance the polarities 01:14:57 - Are you truly worthy of respect? 01:26:12 - Are you making the right decisions? 01:30:24 - Recap

Marine heals PTSD with brain mapping and plant medicine. Brain-mapping is a relatively new technology that trains a person to recreate neural patterns. Veteran marine Luke Jensen speaks on how he healed his PTSD through brain-mapping and plant medicine and how these modalities can help people with unwanted emotional patterns like anxiety and depression. We discuss the Marine Corps, PTSD psychological vs spiritual side, post-war rituals, war and the concept of nationality, Germanic paganism and more. Check out Luke's work: https://www.tiwazawakening.com/ 00:00 - Intro 00:03 - Recalling marine journey 08:05 - Marine corps and legal issues 15:40 - (Afghanistan) war and corruption 19:37 - War and the concept of nationality 25:38 - War zone and politics 32:53 - After war psychological crisis 34:20 - PTSD as modern phenomenon 44:39 - What is brain mapping? 53:50 - Brain mapping and plant medicine 58:05 - Stress response and brain mapping

Almost all internal conflict can be described as the Heart vs. Mind Dilemma— Your thoughts want one thing and your feelings want another. The episode covers how to solve this dilemma: When to listen to your head over your heart? When to listen to your heart over your mind? How do you calibrate your intuition? 00:00 - Heart vs. Mind Dilemma 01:35 - Announcements 04:13 - Distortions of the head and heart 06:05 - Why logic kills creativity 08:50 - Should we follow our heart or mind? 14:00 - When to listen to your heart over your mind 16:08 - When you shouldn't listen to your feelings 24:41 - Do you empower your heart? 30:59 - Is your intuition calibrated? 36:38 - Synergy of heart and mind 46:05 - Recap

The desire for dominance is within all men. A man has to be connected to his dominance in order to be a useful lover, father, leader, teammate. But how does a dominant man act? What does it mean to be dominant in relationships, without being a jerk? This episode covers the psychology behind informal power dynamics, how to be a more dominant male, the real importance of dominance in relationships, how a dominant man takes responsibility, why a dominant man makes woman feel safe, why a dominant male takes risks, how handling tension is a sign of dominance, signs of a dominant man (in relationships), and deep down why dominance is within all men. 00:00 Importance of Dominance in Relationships 04:31 Dominance and Approval 08:14 What does it mean to be dominant in relationships? 13:57 How to be the dominant person in relationships? 15:15 Dominant man takes responsibility 16:40 Handling tension is a sign of dominance 19:08 How does a dominant man act?