The Cost Of Choosing You

Send us Fan MailKnowing it's the right thing doesn't make it stop hurting. This is a short episode of questions, for anyone still missing someone they know they can't go back to.In this episode:Why missing someone doesn't mean you're wrong to have leftThe questions to ask yourself before you decide what the missing actually meansThe difference between grieving a person and grieving who you were with themSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us Fan MailWhat Choosing Yourself Really Costs — And Why It's Worth It AnywayWe talk about "choosing yourself" "main character energy" like it's easy once you decide to do it. A one-and-done decision.Nobody shows you what the middle part looks like - the disappointing people, the sitting with guilt that isn't yours, the questioning whether you're the problem the moment someone reacts badly to your boundary. Or how that feels.In this revisit episode, I go back to "choose you" and show you the texture of it. Not the after. The during.What it costs you.Why it's worth it.Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us Fan MailTrigger warning: this episode touches on domestic violence, childhood trauma, childhood sexual abuse and incest.In this episode of RR&L, I am joined by Caroline Brunne, a woman who wears many hats, including trauma survivor coach, breathwork facilitator, author, professional speaker, and one half of the team that is Deep Breaths With Louie (aka she is Louie the Therapy Dog’s human)We discuss:Parenting as a DV and CSA SurvivorThe challenges of raising safe boys/menNervous system regulation, how we show up for others and how the energy transfers and...Of course…  LouieCaroline Brunne is a trauma survivor coach, breathwork facilitator, author, professional speaker, and Founder of INSupport Community.She guides adult trauma survivors through one-on-one coaching, classes and workshops, creating safe, empowering spaces for healing and growth. Alongside Louie, her certified therapy dog, Caroline combines coaching, breathwork and animal-assisted therapy to support regulation, resilience, and personal transformation.Drawing on her lived experience of incest, child sexual abuse, and family and domestic violence, Caroline transforms trauma into empowerment, helping survivors and their supporters navigate recovery with clarity and compassion. She prioritises inclusion, diversity, and accessibility in all her programs, ensuring people of any gender, age, or background can access support. Through her work, Caroline helps survivors reclaim their voices, embrace their whole selves, and realise they are more than their past, modelling a path toward life beyond trauma.Connect with CarolineWebsiteInstagramLinkedInand LouieSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us Fan MailThere is a quiet power I see in my clients, during divorce, and after it. Because power, real power, is what becomes available on the other side.A quiet, settled, deeply rooted kind. A kind that doesn't ask permission or require validation. It simply exists. The quiet power we can access after divorce.Knowing your worth in divorce changes everything.This episode is about the woman who is fully, finally becoming aware of everything she is capable of being after divorce and what that actually looks like in practice.What it means to choose yourself - in the big moments and the small.Why coming home to yourself is the most powerful thing you can do.Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us Fan MailNobody tells you this part. There is a plot twist to divorce.Yes, divorce is painful. Yes, it is grief and heartbreak and chaos and hard in ways you didn't see coming. All of that is true.And also (plot twist) - there is an after. One that can be, if you let it, genuinely and surprisingly good.In this episode I'm talking to three women at once. It's for you if you are...still in the thick of it and can barely see past todaystarting to come up for air and can almost see possibility of life afterwardsthrough the worst of it but still sometimes wonder, at 2am, if it was all worth it.And it's for you if you're ready to honour and celebrate what's next, what life gets to feel like after divorce, but you're not sure how.I talk about what divorce actually cracks open. What you realise about yourself on the other side and the space that opens up, ready for you and your very own plot twist - the one you get to write for yourself.Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us Fan MailUnderstanding Anxiety in Kids During Separation & Divorce, with Dr. Jodi RichardsonIn this episode, we're joined by Dr. Jodi Richardson - anxiety and mental health expert, bestselling author of Anxious Kids and Anxious Mums, former teacher, and host of podcast Well, Hello Anxiety.Jodi brings a rare mix of research, clinical experience and real warmth to one of the hardest parenting challenges: supporting kids through the anxiety of separation and divorce.We talk about:What anxiety in children actually looks like during separationAge-appropriate ways to talk to kids about anxietyHow children silently absorb parental stressPractical strategies for building resilience through one of life's most stressful transitionsConnect with Dr. Jodi Richardson: Website: https://drjodirichardson.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-jodi-richardson-15589240/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjodirichardson/Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us Fan MailThe decisions you're making today have real, long term implications and they don't disappear once the divorce is finalised.They compound. And they affect the life and the future version of you that is coming for you.In this episode, Sallyanne asks the question most of us never think to ask in the middle of a crisis: who's speaking for the version of you that's still being built?What changes when future you gets a vote, and why it matters.Because maybe someone is missing from the decision making. Not your lawyer. Not your therapist. Not the voice in your head running on fear and exhaustion.The person you'll be in a year. In five.There is no one right answer or way through the messy hard parts of divorce. It's about the difference between a decision made in survival mode and one made with a thread of awareness running through it, even a painful one.Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us Fan MailIn this episode of Reflect, Reclaim & Liberate, I talk about what my divorce coaching clients say actualllly made them go, and it almost never looked like the dramatic ending you'd expect.No affair. No blow-up. Just a slow, quiet erosion of hope, trust, and the version of themselves they used to be, often reaching its final, clear moment on the most ordinary of days.If you're in the hard in-between right now - wondering whether to stay or go, feeling like you can't point to "one big reason," or grieving a relationship you're technically still in - this episode is for you. What relationship erosion really looks like, the myths that keep people stuck in unhappy marriages, and how to start trusting your own knowing again.In this episode:What clients actually said made them finally leave (it's rarely what you'd think)The difference between falling out of love and losing yourselfWhat "grieving a relationship you haven't left yet" really feels likeCommon myths that keep people stuck in the decision to stay or leaveA few reflective questions to sit with, if you're in the in-betweenSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us Fan MailThe challenges of dating after divorce and why matchmaking may offer a more supported, intentional approach for those rebuilding their lives and looking for meaningful connection.After years in a relationship, many people find themselves asking: Who am I now? What do I want next? How do I open my heart again without repeating old patterns?In this episode of Reflect, Reclaim & Liberate, Sallyanne chats with Megan Gourlay, founder of bespoke matchmaking service Love With MeTogether they explore:The exhausting experience of the dating appsHow matchmaking offers a more intentional approach to finding connectionWhy dating after a long-term relationship requires a different kind of supportThe vulnerability that comes with putting yourself back out thereCommon patterns that can get in the way of finding love againHow to date from a place of self-awareness, confidence and choiceLove with Me WebsiteInstagramSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us Fan MailLast week was about the gifts of solo travel. This week, we're looking at the other side - the loneliness that can quietly take hold after divorce (even before you leave a relationship or marriage), and what it actually looks like to move through it and out the other side.We also talk about saying "I'm fine" for so long that you even start to believe it... when you're not.And the flip side: what a life built entirely on your own terms can genuinely look and feel like - and what it actually takes to get there.In this episode:The 'who would do that for me?' question and why it mattersWhy high-functioning, capable women are often the loneliestThe loneliness of being surrounded by people who knew the old youSmall steps to start moving yourself through itReminder: the happily solo life is real and what it takes to get thereRelated episodes: The Loneliness No-one Warned You About 5 Types of Loneliness in Relationship Breakdown, Separation and Divorce Solitude, Loneliness & Dating After Divorce with Kerri SackvilleSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & StrategistHow you can work with meBook a free intro callFree Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The MasterclassJoin the Reflect VIP Mailing ListFollow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.