Divorce Burnout Is Real: How Spoon Theory Can Help You Cope

Send us a textMost people imagine co-parenting as two exes attending school events together, making decisions hand-in-hand, and communicating smoothly.But for many separated parents, that ideal isn’t realistic or possible, and forcing it can actually increase conflict and stress.In this episode, I bust common myths about co-parenting, explain why what you think you know might be wrong, and share practical ways to protect your wellbeing while staying fully present for your kids.What You’ll Learn:Why the “perfect co-parenting” fantasy can be harmfulThe difference between co-parenting and parallel parentingSigns you might not actually be co-parentingHow to reduce conflict and redefine post-divorce parenting in ways that make sense to your familyIf you want clarity, confidence, and strategies for healthier post-separation parenting, this episode is for you.Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a textStarting over after separation or divorce often means rethinking not just your love life, but your career too. In this episode, I’m joined by Career & Life Coach Annique Teycheney to explore why job hunting feels a lot like dating - and why the key to both is knowing yourself first.We talk about values, boundaries, green & red flags, and how to recognise the roles (and relationships) that are truly the right fit for you.If you’re navigating career change, job seeking, or dating after divorce, this conversation will help you see the parallels, avoid common pitfalls, and take your next steps with clarity and confidence.Follow Annique on LinkedIn and Instagram @anniquecoachingSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a textFor anyone stuck in survival mode, deciding whether to stay or go, or rebuilding after divorce.How to rewire your beliefs, release what’s weighing you down, and create real change after separation or divorce.If you’ve been stuck in divorce survival mode—burnt out, overwhelmed, and carrying the weight of your divorce (or your should-I-stay-or-go decision) on your shoulders—this episode is your wake-up call.Manifestation alone won’t get you out of this cycle.You don’t need another vision board, affirmation, or crystal to change your life. You need clarity, rewiring, and action.In this episode, I’ll walk you through three simple but powerful exercises to uncover your own answers and create a pathway out of survival and into steady, grounded thriving.Whether you’re deciding to stay or go, navigating separation, or creating a post-divorce life you love, this is your personal call to action.Because if you want different results, you can’t keep doing the same things. You have to become different. And just sitting on the couch waiting for the universe to deliver won’t get you where you want to be.Rio Richards - Somatic PracticesBianca Marics - Managing Stress & BurnoutSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a textDivorce can keep your nervous system on constant high alert -  heart racing, mind spinning, emotions all over the place. In that state, clear, calm, strategic communication feels almost impossible.In this episode, I’m sharing why nervous system regulation is the communication superpower during separation and divorce. You’ll learn:What dysregulation actually is (and how it hijacks your communication)The signs your body has taken over the driver’s seatPractical, simple regulation tools you can use in the moment, anywhere, anytimeHow you can access these tools and build your communicaiton superpower to protect your energy, keep the long game in mind, and show up as the version of you who can handle whatever comes next.Listen in and start building your regulation muscle, so you can communicate in a way that protects your peace and your future.Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a textLeaving a relationship when nothing is dramatically wrong can feel hard.If your partner's a good person? If no one would understand why you're unhappy?Before walking away from your marriage or leaving your relationship, ask yourself this one thing.In this episode, Sallyanne explores the quiet, complicated space of choosing yourself - even when your relationship isn’t a complete disaster.You’ll learn: 💬 The one question to ask yourself when you're unsure whether to stay or go💬 Why you don’t need a big betrayal or dramatic reason to justify leaving💬 How to honour the relationship and choose your future💬 Why scaffolding yourself with support is essentialThis is a hopeful, grounding conversation for anyone standing at the edge of a decision, or moving through the big emotions of separation or divorce.Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a textYou didn't become selfish. You became self-honouring.What if being called “selfish” isn’t an insult, but a sign you’re finally choosing yourself?In this episode, we explore the powerful shift from self-abandonment to self-honouring in relationships, through separation and during divorce.If you’ve been made to feel guilty for setting boundaries, prioritising your needs, or no longer being easily controlled, this is your reminder:You didn’t become selfish. You became self-honouring.You became sovereign.Listen to hear:The difference between selfishness and self-responsibilityHow guilt and manipulation show up (louder, stronger) when you start honouring yourselfWhat self-honouring actually looks like in real life (especially in divorce and reorganising life afterwards)This is a reclamation.Of your needs. Your boundaries. Your peace.Because selfish?Maybe it’s sacred.Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a textAn episode about choosing kindness, courage and compassion through separation, divorce and beyond - especially when it isn’t coming back your way.When you’re going through divorce, kindness can feel like the last thing you’re supposed to choose - especially when others are telling you to go harder, or when the system feels harsh, scary and adversarial.In this episode, I share my own story of not finding kindness in the process… and why I decided to choose it and create it anyway.I’ll talk about what kindness really looks like in divorce, why it matters, and how to stay anchored in your values, even when no one else around you is modelling it.I’ll share 6 truths I know - from lived experience of divorce and coaching many through it - about why kindness matters and why it can create better outcomes for everyone involved.Kindness in divorce isn't weakness. It's powerful.This episode is also for anyone who works in or around family law, separation or divorce - about how we as practitioners can bring kindness to our work and change experiences and outcomes.Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a textFeeling emotionally, physically and energetically depleted during separation, through divorce, even beyond?Divorce burnout is real.This episode introduces Spoon Theory. A simple explanation and easily implemented way to help you protect your energy, avoid burnout, and focus on what truly matters.The Spoon Theory written by Christine MiserandinoSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a textWaking Up to Your Own LifeWhether you're questioning your marriage or relationship, navigating separation or divorce.If you’ve been hiding under the covers, eyes tightly shut, afraid to really look at your life, avoiding what hurts, staying stuck in the same stories, this episode is for you.I talk about: ✨ Why staying in the dark can feel safer ✨ The fear of really looking at your life ✨ The quiet decision to wake up and take responsibility ✨ How to begin letting go, gently and honestlyYou don’t have to have it all figured out.You just have to be willing to open your eyes.To WAKE UP to the possibility for your life.If this resonates: 💛 Share it with someone who needs it ⭐ Leave a review to help others find the showSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a textHow to Hold It Together While Falling Apart During DivorceHow to Keep Going in the Hardest Days of Your Divorce 💙This episode is shared in loving memory of my beautiful Mum, Helen Hartnell, who taught me how to do hard things with kindness, compassion and grace.The early days of separation and divorce are hard - it feels like your whole world is unravelling and there is no solid ground under your feet.And there are other moments through divorce when it feels too hard, too overwhelming.This episode is for those moments.How to keep going, how to hold it together while falling apart during divorce.More about Spoon Theory and divorce HEREIf you found this episode helpful:💛 Share it with someone who might need it⭐ Leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify - it helps more people find these conversations🌿 Follow the podcast to get the next episode in your feedSallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist How you can work with me Book a free intro call Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive Free Resources & Downloads- Choose You Guidebook- Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts- Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass Follow me on INSTAGRAMAll relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.