You'll Rue the Day (S13E09)

We made it! It's the end of the season. Join Conde Nasty and Hersula the Sea Bitch as one more season finally draws to a close. We laugh. We cry. We drink margaritas. The queens face off in a Britney Spears-themed lip sync battle before [SPOILER] is crowned the new queen. It's been a long and lovely season, and we'll see you all for All Stars 6!

Please close your tray tables and put your tucks in the upright and locked position as Glamazonian Airways Flight 13 is beginning its descent into the finale. But before we can crown a new winner, we have to put the final four through some very familiar paces. Music video? Check. Tic Tacs? Check. Tearful messages to our younger selves? Check and double check.  Join Hersula, Conde Nasty, and guest Valkyrie to assess the top four queens, the season as a whole, and whatever the hell else they feel like.

Recording for the first time in person for over a year, Hersula and Conde Nasty are here to whittle down the top five into a final four and generally readjust to speaking to each other face to face. Like this season, it's a long journey.

Hersula and Conde Nasty, joined by special guest Tara, are all over the map this week. With topics ranging from why Tamisha Iman is still right to armchair psychoanalysis, nothing is off limits (or coherent). And then we try our hands at gently roasting the gurls, something this week's contestants should have considered trying.

It's time for the queens to sell themselves in a vaguely defined product challenge. (At least it's not a soup can you wear like a barrel in a 1930s cartoon.) This week Conde Nasty and Hersula are joined by recurring BFF Buffy Cummers to assess the commercials and watch the queens claw their way through another runway, this time dressed as BEASTS. Which queen will be sent back to the wilds of working a gay bar on a Tuesday night for tips? Listen and find out...  

It's the makeover challenge, and since it isn't safe to bring in a group of unsuspecting civilians, they queens are making over each other! Join Conde Nasty and Hersula to judge the queens, and later, we'll bust out the Ouija board and scare up Clara the Cow to see what she thought of Tina Burner deciding today was the day to try a new color scheme.

It's the most wonderful time of the year: Snatch Game! BFF Valkyrie joins Conde Nasty and Hersula to break down all the truly questionable decisions the queens made on this year's panel. Then the queens try to fascinate the judges with their fashion on the runway, and one queen is left without a leg to stand on.

Oblivia is back, and they. have. opinions. Join them and Conde Nasty and Hersula to attend the only musical still running right now. That's right, it's the Rusical! After the curtain falls on their tribute to social media, the gurls brighten up the runway in dazzling array of yellow looks. And, yes, Michelle. It was yellow.

No matter how chaotic and uncertain the world may be, there remains this unchanging constant: most improv performances are kind of awkward to sit through. Join Conde Nasty and Hersula as they politely watch the girls try their best before stringing together some beaded eleganza on the runway.

Conde Nasty and Hersula welcome back Buffy Cummers to break down this week's episode that sees the girls dance through a disco documentary and walk the runway serving their takes on the eternal classic, the Little Black Dress.  More importantly, this episode serves as a long, detailed, and entirely deserved love letter to one Tamisha Iman. Until we meet again in All Stars...