Overthinking and Overfunctioning? Retrain Your Brain and Settle Your Nervous System | Cameron Allen

How often do you talk yourself out of what you want?In this solo episode, I’m starting the Yes Movement: saying yes to doing something for yourself once a day, every day, through the end of the year. Then we take it into 2027.So many of us are doing something I call the quiet override. We quietly override the things we want because we’re afraid of how it will look, what people will say, or how disruptive it will be to stop doing things just to keep the peace. So we’re going to practice the opposite, one clean yes at a time.In this episode:The quiet override, and the questions that help you find where it’s coming fromMorning pages, a simple way to get clear on the thoughts and beliefs underneath (from Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way)What to do with the fear of what other people will think (Sally and Margaret, this one’s for you)The clean yes: just for you, no guilt, no justifying, no dissertationIdeas for your daily yes: yin yoga, the shoes, a night off from making dinner, school lunch, cringe moments, a Wednesday mani-pedi, a walk with your thoughtsThree questions for a good yesWhy “Do I want to keep my promises to myself?” works better than “Do I feel like it?”Free resourceJoin my free monthly Working on Becoming Workshop: https://www.amcostanzo.com/free-goal-setting-workshopReady to say a helluva lot more yeses to yourself?Book a Breakthrough Session with me, and we can figure out exactly where to begin! https://www.amcostanzo.com/breakthrough-sessionConnectInstagram: @aging.fiercelyWebsite: amcostanzo.comYouTube: @amcostanzowellnessWhat’s your yes today? Send me a DM on Instagram and tell me. And if this episode resonated, share it with your bestie, and please leave a review - it only takes a minute, and it helps me grow my community ❤️

You’re doing all the things. You’re lifting, eating the protein, maybe taking the hormones. So why do you still feel like you’re playing whack-a-mole with your own body?Dori Martin has been there. She’s a functional diagnostic nutrition practitioner, certified yoga teacher, and hair tissue mineral analysis practitioner, and when her own symptoms got worse on hormone therapy, she went looking for what her labs weren’t showing her. What she found changed how she thinks about midlife, burnout, and what our bodies need from us.We talk about why your body may not have the energy to use what you’re giving it, why the unsexy basics matter more than the next supplement, and how to stop being ping-ponged through your own life. Dori also shares how she and her partner handled a terminal diagnosis by asking one better question: what lights you up?Key TakeawaysWhen something stops working, it may be the information that failed you, not you. A sound bite can’t account for your body or your life.Hormones may not be the whole story. Dori isn’t against them, but she wants to know what your body is doing with them.Going hard at the gym can backfire when you’re depleted, because your body may be breaking down faster than it can build up.Stress isn’t only emotional. Poor sleep, dehydration, shallow breathing, and missing morning sunshine all register as stress too.The way you talk to yourself matters. Dori calls it the biggest nervous system dysregulator of all.Be the thermostat, not the thermometer. Set the tone for your day instead of reacting to it.Retrain your brain by writing down one thing that delighted you today.Dose calm throughout the day: a long exhale at a stop sign, scanning the room, or passing an object from one hand to the other.Connect With DoriWebsite: https://www.dorimartin.com/homeInstagram: @midlifeenergy.doriProgram: Foundations FabulousGet your 5 Minute Nervous System Tune UP!Connect With Anne MarieFree ResourceJoin the free monthly Working on Becoming Workshop: https://www.amcostanzo.com/free-goal-setting-workshopWant Help Getting Started?Book a Breakthrough Session with me. It’s one hour on ZoomLearn more about Breakthrough Sessions!Website:amcostanzo.comInstagram: @aging.fiercelyYouTube: AM Costanzo WellnessYour TurnWhat’s one small thing you can do for yourself today, before your to-do list gets going? Tell me on Instagram @aging.fiercely

There are nine weeks left in the year. That’s either plenty of time or no time at all, depending on how many holiday parties you’ve already said yes to.Instead of waiting for January 1st to magically turn you into a new person, let’s use these nine weeks to build proof that you can show up for yourself. This episode is about the quiet override: the moment you hear that little voice say, “I should really do this for me,” and then talk yourself out of it because someone else needs something, the store closes at six, or meditating at 2 pm feels ridiculous.We’re getting selfish for nine weeks. The good kind of selfish. So when the ball drops, you’re not starting from scratch. You’re already ahead.Your 9-Week PlanPhase 1: Set the Table (now through Thanksgiving)Pick one small thing you can do for yourself every single day. Movement, a 10-minute stretch, a 9:30 bedtime, drinking 50 ounces of water. It has to be easy enough that “I’m too busy” doesn’t hold up. Track it, and jot down how it feels. You’re building trust with yourself.Phase 2: Add One Intention (Thanksgiving through New Year’s Day)Keep your one thing, and add a daily intention. Before your to-do list comes at you in the morning, ask: How do I want to feel today? Calm. Present. Like laughing comes easy. Set a reminder on your phone or a sticky note, because you will forget. If you remember three days later, no big deal. Just set one and keep going.Phase 3: Reflect (between Christmas and New Year’s)Carve out 30–60 minutes and ask yourself three questions:What do I want more of?What do I want less of?What’s just right?Key TakeawaysIf you can only relax once everyone else is taken care of, that’s a pattern worth flipping.Small daily actions are evidence. Five minutes of movement on a packed day still counts, and what it proves is bigger than the walk.Missing a day doesn’t make you a failure. Just pick it back up.Setting an intention trains your brain to go looking for what you want to feel (hello, reticular activating system).When you’ve been practicing all along, you get back to neutral faster when life tilts.This works better in community. Share what you’re noticing.Free ResourceJoin my free monthly Working on Becoming Workshop: https://www.amcostanzo.com/free-goal-setting-workshopWant Help With Your Plan?Book a Breakthrough Session: one hour, one-on-one with me on Zoom to map out the next nine weeks and beyond. Details at amcostanzo.com.Connect with AM: Website: amcostanzo.comYouTube: amcostanzowellness Substack: Aging FiercelyInstagram: @aging.firecelyFollow along with me for the next nine weeks on Substack and Instagram. I'm doing this right alongside you!

Why do so many smart, capable women know exactly what they should be doing with their money and still not do it? In our first-ever money episode of Aging Fiercely, I sit down with Crystal Janis of Dreamz on Fire, and her answer goes a lot deeper than spreadsheets.Crystal started out in wealth management, then spent years teaching economics and personal finance at Berkeley High School. Now she works with adults, and she says most of us already know the basics: spend less than you make, have a plan, save, pay down the credit card debt, invest. The real question is why we aren’t doing those things. Her answer is that you’re not bad at money. Money is triggering a safety pattern you learned as a kid.We peel back those layers. We talk about where you learned to give your power away, and why avoiding the bank account feels like relief until it doesn’t. Crystal explains how the survival strategy that once kept you safe can quietly become your income ceiling. She shares her own “do it all, trust no one” pattern, and how she realized she didn’t want independence so much as freedom.In this conversation:Why the money skills are the easy part and the inner work is the hard partThe avoidance loop: how dodging your money reinforces “I’m not enough”The superpower hiding inside your childhood survival strategy“I’m a mess up” vs. “I messed up,” and swapping “I am” for “I feel”You can’t outrun your wounds: setting down the 200-pound boulderMoney as a mirror, and why fixing the process isn’t the same as healing the identityWhy your body fights change, and how to self-soothe through itRethinking your budget as your “money bestie,” a way to align your money with your dreamsA client who went from about $50K in credit card debt to debt free in six monthsCrystal’s number one step: 30 minutes a week on your calendar, with a buddyUsing AI to work through triggers and spot your patternsConnect with Crystal Janis:Website: DreamzOnFire.comInstagram: @crystal.rigley.janisFinancially Empowered: one-to-one coaching or a group program with two levels. You can book a free call through her website.Connect with AM:Website: amcostanzo.comYouTube: amcostanzowellnessSubstack: Aging FiercelyInstagram: aging.fiercely

What if the brain fog, the overwhelm, and that feeling of "I don't even know who I am anymore" aren't proof that something is wrong with you or that you need fixing? In this episode, I sit down with Cameron Allen, founder of Neuro Progeny, to talk about what's happening in the nervous system when we feel overwhelmed and anxious, and why that dysregulation can intensify during perimenopause and menopause.Cameron's path started with his brother, who struggled with depression after a series of head injuries. When a neurotherapy program brought him back, Cameron spent the next 22 years testing brain-based interventions and built XRegulation, an at-home program that uses virtual reality and heart rate variability biofeedback to help regulate the nervous system. It's designed to reconnect your mind and your body, because when we tune into how our bodies feel, we gain so much more awareness of our thoughts, behaviors, and patterns.We talk about why the nervous system's bigger job is conserving energy by predicting what happens next, how shifting estrogen, oxytocin, and GABA can leave women feeling disconnected from themselves, and why the vagus nerve offers another way back to that connection. What your nervous system wants is flexibility, the ability to bounce back from an emotional moment without it lingering in your body for days. He calls it state fluidity.In this conversation:The moment Cameron's brother came back, and why it became Cameron's life's workWhy your nervous system runs on prediction, and what happens when it gets it wrongHow the hormonal cycle gives women access to different brain states, and what shifts in perimenopauseWhat heart rate variability isWhy an argument can linger in your body for daysA simple way to feel oxytocin in your body right nowWhy feeling slightly frustrated is part of how the brain learnsHow "I'll slow down when..." turns into a busy identityAsking "How do I want to feel today?" before you get out of bedFinding your three true self words and making decisions from themHow the five-week XRegulation program works, from the home headset to weekly coaching with CameronWhy every state you've lived through is an asset as you ageConnect with Cameron Allen: Website: neuroprogeny.comInstagram: @neuro_cameron Book a free 30-minute consultation with Cameron through the website.Connect with AM: Website: amcostanzo.com YouTube: amcostanzowellness Substack: Aging FiercelyInstagram: aging.fiercely

What do you do when what you've always done stops working, and you catch yourself saying, "I don't know who I am anymore"? In this episode, I sit down with Ramona Kossowan, Canada's first certified Gentle Trauma Release practitioner, certified women's empowerment coach, and fitness trainer, to talk about how unresolved trauma affects our behavior in midlife, often without us realizing it, and how safety opens the door to healing. Ramona's answer is that for most of us, the nervous system is driving our behavior, beliefs, relationships, and sense of worth through adaptations we formed in response to trauma. She defines trauma as distress without resolve, and it isn't only the big events. It can be a slow erosion of your sense of self. Because we may not connect what we're feeling to trauma at all, she starts with our symptoms and when they began, often around a period like a falling out with a child or parent, or years of caring for an elderly relative. From there, her work starts with safety, the foundation that opens the door to healing. Subtle nervous system exercises give the body the message that it's safe, and that’s when the body shows what it's ready to release. As the distress comes down, a memory loses its intensity and the way we see things begins to shift on its own. Ramona notes this is a complementary method, not a replacement for medical treatment. We also get into the identities we take on to survive, why she looks at shame before she talks about food, and her advice for anyone who wants to age fiercely: don't accept limits that were pushed on you. We discuss:Why so many women reach a breaking point in midlifeTrauma is defined as distress without resolveWhy we may not realize our patterns are trauma-basedWhy safety comes before releaseHow nervous system exercises workThe identities we take on to survive: mother energy and daughter energyWhy fitness comes later, and movement that feels joyfulAdvice for aging fiercely: don't accept limits that were pushed on youConnect with Ramona Kossowan: Website: ramonakcoaching.com Gentle Trauma Release: gentletraumacoach.comFacebook: Ramona K CoachingInstagram: @ramonakcoachingLinkedIn: Ramona KossowanYouTube: Ramona K CoachingFree Resource: Is it Trauma? Explore the often overlooked symptoms of trauma: Gentle Trauma AssessmentFree Resource: When food feels chaotic, who's running the show? Find your Food Archetype: Food Archetype Opt-inConnect with AM: Website: amcostanzo.comYouTube: amcostanzowellnessSubstack: Aging FiercelyInstagram: aging.fiercely

Why don't affirmations work, even when you say them every day? In this episode, I sit down with Allison Pagano, founder of Embodied Dance®, to talk about what happens when you finally let your body back into the conversation — and it comes down to somatic movement.Allison's own path into somatic movement started in her twenties, when she was in what she describes as a depressed, shut-down state and struggling with an eating disorder. A class with an indigenous teacher during a study-abroad year in Australia introduced her to chakras and energy work for the first time, and it cracked open a question she's been chasing ever since: what is my body actually trying to tell me?We get into how to tell a limiting belief apart from your body's genuine no, why affirmations don't work when there's an unresolved belief underneath, and how she uses movement as medicine to help people release what's stuck. She also talks about her own body of work, informed by what she calls the Collard Method, which links specific areas of the body to specific emotional patterns. And she doesn't shy away from the bigger point underneath all of it: why disconnection from your body makes you easier to control, and how reclaiming that connection is its own kind of power.In this conversation:How an eating disorder in her twenties led her to found Embodied DanceHow to tell a limiting belief apart from your body's genuine "no"Why affirmations don't work when your body doesn't believe themWhy certain body areas hold certain emotional patternsWhy disconnection from your body makes you easier to controlWhat a somatic movement session actually looks likeWhy she works with small groups of five or six people, by designWho the "quiet rebels" are that she mentors into leadershipHer one piece of advice for a woman looking to age fiercelyConnect with Allison Pagano: FREE TRAINING: The Body as Oracle: Awakening the Teacher Within — a free live class on Oct. 23, 2026  for the "quiet rebels" ready to step into their next chapter. embodied-dance.com/body-as-oracle (check website for accurate start time - she’s in Sydney Australia.)Website: embodied-dance.com Instagram: @embodied.danceConnect with AM: Website: amcostanzo.com YouTube: amcostanzowellness Substack: Aging Fiercely Instagram: aging.fiercely

Have you ever tried to feel truly happy, truly abundant, truly at peace for just 17 seconds straight — and had your brain shut it down after four? In this episode, recorded live on one of my walk/runs - as part of a 30-day commitment to show up and share whatever's on my mind -I get into a practice I've heard about for years but never actually tried: the 17 second rule.It comes from Abraham Hicks by way of my own coach, Cathy Heller, and the idea is deceptively simple — get into the emotion you want to feel, fully, for a full 17 seconds, and you start shifting your momentum and what you attract. It sounds easy. It is not that easy. I talk through what happens when I try it, why our brains fight so hard against letting us feel good before "the problems are solved," and why stepping into that feeling on purpose is what it means to “step into your power.”Connect with AM:Website: amcostanzo.comYouTube: amcostanzowellnessInstagram: aging.fiercely

In this episode of Aging Fiercely, I sit down with Noreen Noble, a certified somatic integrated life coach and debut author of The Superhero Inside: Find Your Power, Own Your Story, Change Your World. We dive into somatic coaching and why healing the mind isn't enough on its own — your body holds wisdom and memory that logic alone can't reach. Noreen shares how a cancer diagnosis led her from mindset coaching into somatic work, and why self-love (not selfishness) is the foundation everything else is built on. She also walks us through the research behind her book — she studied 150+ superhero origin stories and found nine patterns that mirror how real people discover their own power.Key Takeaways1. Somatic coaching bridges the gap mindset work leaves behind. Managing your thoughts is powerful, but most of us operate from a "belief loop" formed in childhood — interpreting the present through old protective lenses. Somatic coaching adds the missing piece: noticing what's happening in your body as real information, not something to fix.2. Self-love isn't selfish — it's the foundation for everything else. The quality of your life will never exceed the quality of the relationship you have with yourself. Trying to control everyone and everything around you is often a sign you haven't yet made peace with what's happening inside you.3. Your body remembers what your mind tries to move past. Noreen shares the science and stories behind why trauma, memory, and emotion live throughout the whole body — not just the brain. Breathwork is her go-to first step for helping clients settle their nervous system and start listening.4. Your "superpower" often comes from what once felt like a wound. After researching the origin stories of over 150 superheroes, Noreen found nine recurring patterns — and realized they mirror how real people develop their gifts: through difference, hardship, training, or transformation. The things that made you feel like you didn't fit in may be exactly where your power lives.Connect with NoreenFree Resource with promo code "PODCAST": Overthinking to Inner Knowing: A 5-day journey designed to help you quiet the mental noise, reconnect with your intuition, and strengthen your ability to trust yourself.noreennoble.com/trustyourselfWebsite: Noreen NobleInstagram: Noreen NobleBook: The Superhero Inside: Find Your Power, Own Your Story, Change Your WorldConnect with AMFree WorkshopSign up for AM's FREE monthly workshop, Working on Becoming—Live on Substack the first Tuesday of every month: https://www.amcostanzo.com/free-goal-setting-workshopInstagram: aging.fiercelySubstack: amcostanzo.substack.comYouTube: amcostanzowellnessWebsite: amcostanzo.comDon't forget to subscribe, rate, and review the podcast if you found this episode valuable. It helps other people discover the show, and it only takes 30 seconds!! ♥️

What does it take to keep the same friend group together for over forty years? In this episode, I'm doing something a little different: I'm on a girls' trip with my three nearest and dearest friends, Jill, Amy, and Deb, the "core four" since fourth grade, and we're talking about what it actually takes to maintain a friendship this long.We got honest about where we all are right now: one of us divorced with no kids, one married with kids and empty nesting, me still knee-deep in carpools and school schedules, and one going through a divorce in real time while the rest of us show up for her. We talked about why we made an annual girls' weekend non-negotiable, how the sandwich generation squeeze of aging parents has made these weekends even more important, and why our friendship has stayed so drama-free and non-transactional. Plus a story about the time our middle school principal literally pulled us out of class to work through a fight, and how playing sports together as teenagers built the teamwork that's carried us through decades.In this conversation:How a friend group that started in fourth grade has lasted over forty yearsWhy we made an annual girls' weekend a non-negotiableNavigating divorce, empty nesting, and the sandwich generation togetherThe difference between a transactional friendship and the real thingThe middle school lesson from our principal that shaped how we handle conflictHow being teammates on a state championship volleyball team built lifelong teamworkOur best advice for other women on aging fiercelyConnect with AM: Website: amcostanzo.com YouTube: amcostanzowellness Substack: Aging Fiercely Instagram: aging.fiercely