68: Why You Keep Repeating Relationship Patterns Even After Therapy & Self-Work

Send us Fan MailSix weeks. No dates. No physical relationship. Just words, vulnerability, emotional connection—and a text romance that cracked something open in me I didn’t know needed healing.In this deeply personal episode of Rooted & Rising, I share how an unexpected six-week connection became a mirror for the places I had stopped fully loving myself.For years, I had carried stories of being too much, not enough, not lovable enough—and a fear of being abandoned. Without realizing it, I had started looking outside myself for the love, validation, and sense of worth I had stopped giving myself.Then someone came along who saw me, heard me, held space for me, and helped me access parts of myself I had forgotten.This isn't a story about what he couldn't give me. It's about what the connection gave both of us—and what it awakened in me.We’ll talk about self-love, self-worth, fear of abandonment, emotional intimacy, breaking old relationship patterns, reclaiming your authentic self, and what happens when you stop searching outside yourself for what has been within you all along.Sometimes a person doesn't enter your life to complete you. Sometimes they arrive to remind you of the parts of yourself you've forgotten how to love.You were never missing something out there. You were missing you.Stay rooted. Keep rising.Support the show

Send us Fan MailThe Lion’s Gate is open. 8:8. The portal where courage gets to outrun caution, and the unknown stops being something to survive and starts being something to meet.Every threshold in your life — the relationship, the career leap, the friendship shifting shape — has asked you the same question: brace, or believe? Today, on the day the gate cracks open, we’re pondering it out loud. What if the thing you’ve been calling fear was never about the unknown at all? What if it’s just excitement, still wearing its armor?Walk through this one slow. Let it ask you what it’s asking.Support the show

Send us Fan MailThis week’s episode isn’t on time, on track, or on par — and that’s the point. I gave myself the freedom to stop performing, stop chasing, stop pushing to build and create and do. What happens when you just be? What are you missing when you’re always in motion? An unfiltered, unscripted reflection on performance culture, FOMO, and choosing presence over productivity — even when it means showing up without a plan.Support the show

Send us Fan MailHave you ever looked at your life and wondered why certain patterns keep repeating? The same relationship dynamic. The same money story. The same quiet feeling of not being quite enough — no matter how much work you do on yourself?That loop is not a coincidence. It is a story. And the story has a source.In this episode, Tara Mychelle gets personal about the generational pattern she discovered running beneath her own life — a pattern of women contorting themselves to be chosen, passed quietly from grandmother to mother to daughter without anyone ever realizing it was water they were swimming in.Through her own healing journey, Tara shares the perspective shift that changed everything: the moment she stopped asking why she was not being chosen, and started asking what story was running underneath that question.This episode is for anyone who is ready to stop carrying what was never theirs to carry.Because it was never your secret to keep. It is your story to heal.Support the show

Send us Fan MailMost people think manifesting isn’t working. What’s actually missing is the feeling.In this episode of Rooted & Rising, host Tara Mychelle breaks down the real mechanics of manifestation — and it’s not about vision boards or gratitude lists you check off on autopilot. It’s about feeling the energy of what you want as if it’s already done, and then training yourself to recognize the daily evidence that it’s already in motion.Tara introduces the framework of micro wins and macro wins — and why the small moments in your day are not coincidences. They’re confirmation. They’re the universe showing you the track you’re on.In this episode you’ll learn:how to feel into a goal before it arrives, why your gratitude practice might be missing the most important ingredient, what micro wins are and how to start seeing them every day, how small daily evidence stacks into the macro life you’re building, and why manifestation is really just trained attention.If you’ve ever said “manifesting doesn’t work for me” — this episode is for your answer. Support the show

Send us Fan MailHave you ever understood your relationship pattern completely… and still repeated it anyway?In this episode of Rooted & Rising, Tara Mychelle explores the hidden gap between self-awareness and real emotional change — and why understanding your attachment patterns, situationships, or self-sabotaging behaviors doesn’t automatically break the cycle.This episode dives into:situationshipsanxious attachmentemotionally unavailable relationshipsself-awareness without actionhealing relationship patternsnervous system safetyemotional avoidancefear of commitmentfear of being fully seenself-abandonmentrepeating toxic relationship cyclesTara explores why so many thoughtful, emotionally intelligent people stay stuck in “almost” relationships even after doing deep self-work, therapy, healing, journaling, or personal development.This conversation is about the difference between:understanding a patternand actually choosing differentlyIf you’ve ever felt:“I know better, but I still repeat it.”“I understand the pattern but I still feel stuck.”“Why do I keep going back?”“Why does healthy love still feel uncomfortable?”…this episode will resonate deeply.Tara also expands the conversation beyond dating into career, identity, leadership, emotional safety, and the ways “almost energy” can quietly shape every area of life.Support the show

Send us Fan MailAre you trusting divine timing… or avoiding the truth?In this episode of Rooted & Rising, Tara explores the powerful relationship pattern of using “faith,” patience, surrender, or spirituality to stay in emotionally unavailable relationships and situationships long after clarity is needed.This episode dives deep into:situationshipsemotionally unavailable partnersfear of asking for commitmentself-abandonment in relationshipsspiritual bypassing in datingattachment patternswaiting for someone to choose younervous system conditioningfear of rejection and vulnerabilityIf you’ve ever said:“I’m just trusting the timing.”“I don’t want to force anything.”“If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen.”“I’m surrendering.”…this episode may help you recognize when faith has quietly become fear, avoidance, or emotional self-protection.Tara breaks down the difference between grounded faith and passive waiting, why ambiguity can feel emotionally safer than clarity, and how to stop shrinking yourself inside relationships that never fully choose you.This conversation is for anyone healing anxious attachment, navigating situationships, questioning relationship patterns, or learning how to choose themselves instead of waiting endlessly for potential to turn into commitment.Support the show

Send us Fan MailDo you expect rejection before it even happens?In this episode of Rooted & Rising, Tara explores the hidden relationship pattern she calls “pre-rejection” — the subconscious habit of emotionally bracing, pulling back, softening your needs, or choosing emotionally unavailable people before love ever has a real chance to grow.If you’ve ever said:“I’m not getting my hopes up.”“I’m just going with the flow.”“I don’t want to pressure anything.”“Maybe I’m asking for too much.”…this episode may explain why.This conversation dives into situationships, attachment patterns, fear of intimacy, anxious attachment, nervous system conditioning, emotional self-protection, relationship anxiety, and the hidden ways people sabotage love before rejection even happens.Tara breaks down:Why emotionally unavailable relationships feel familiarWhy uncertainty can feel safer than commitmentHow fear of rejection shapes dating choicesWhy you may soften your needs in relationshipsThe nervous system science behind emotional bracingHow to stop choosing “almost relationships”What it looks like to start receiving healthy loveIf you’re tired of living in ambiguity, overthinking relationships, or waiting for the other shoe to drop, this episode will help you recognize the pattern and begin shifting it.Support the show

Send us Fan MailIf you keep ending up in situationships, emotionally unavailable relationships, or “almost” connections that never fully become commitment, this episode is for you.In this episode of Rooted & Rising, Tara Michelle breaks down the hidden emotional payoff behind almost relationships, why uncertainty can feel addictive, and how attachment patterns, nervous system conditioning, fear of intimacy, and fear of being fully chosen can quietly shape your love life.This is a deep conversation about emotional availability, dating patterns, self-worth, trauma responses, commitment, healing relationship cycles, and learning how to stop bonding with potential and start choosing clarity.If you’ve ever wondered:Why do I attract emotionally unavailable people?Why do situationships feel so hard to leave?Why does healthy love feel unfamiliar?Why do I fear commitment and vulnerability?How do I stop repeating relationship patterns?This episode will help you understand the deeper pattern underneath “almost” love.Plus, Tara shares practical steps to break free from ambiguity, redefine relationship standards, and begin creating healthier, rooted, emotionally safe relationships.Support the show

Send us Fan MailCalm can be the scariest feeling in dating when your body is used to bracing. If you have ever stepped away from someone steady because the spark felt “off,” we get into the real reason that happens and it is not a character flaw. It is often nervous system conditioning built through situationships, inconsistency, and emotional whiplash that trained you to read activation as connection.I unpack the difference between adrenaline and intimacy, and why rooted love can feel quiet, slow, and even confusing at first. We talk about how the highs and lows of uncertain relationships keep you scanning for signals, decoding texts, and chasing clarity, then how that cycle can start to feel like chemistry. When a partner is emotionally available and consistent, your system may not shout “yes” right away. Sometimes it whispers, exhales, and waits for you to catch up.You will also hear a simple practice to help you discern peace versus numbness, plus a powerful question to journal on: what sensations do you associate with connection, and where did you learn that? If you want to go deeper, I share my e-guide From Almost There to All the Way: A Bold Guide to Ending Situationships and Choosing Commitment, linked in the show notes.If this landed, subscribe so you do not miss what is next, share it with a friend stuck in an almost-relationship, and leave a review to help more people find Rooted in Rising.Support the show