You Create Your Own Reality

The world of social media is all I've known since I was 15. It has always had its pros and cons but over the past few years I really noticed how badly it was consuming me. I worked hard after losing Francesco to find validation and serenity in myself. Even with all that growth, I still found myself going back into my bad and unhealthy habits. To help others, you have to be able to help yourself. That's why I've decided to keep the promise that I made to myself.

Today I answer 14 of your most commonly asked questions hoping to give a little input on the way I feel and how my grieving process is looking today.

I sat down with Sal Carollo this week, and we spoke about the grief he felt from losing not only his mother to cancer, but his cousin Francesco as well, all in the matter of a year. He talks about some of his coping mechanisms, his experience being a caretaker, ways that he likes to honor his mother, and some of his favorite last memories with her. Everyone experiences grief differently, but the one thing that I know we all share in common is that the grief hurts, and it is okay to NOT be okay.

I don’t believe that when we die it is just "lights out". I believe that there is so much more to life and death, so much, that our brains would never be able to process the full truth if we had it. In this episode I discuss the three major “signs” that I received from my boyfriend who passed away. These signs changed my perspective on afterlife, and I hope it does the same for you too.

I wanted to open up the conversation about mediums, because I want to see where everyone stands on this topic. ARE MEDIUMS LYING TO US? If they aren't lying, how did they get this special gift, and why wasn't I one of the chosen ones? I need answers..... Hopefully our crazy experience can help put things into perspective for you.

I sit down with my mother, who opened up about her decision to leave my father. She packed her bags, and moved back in with her mother (my grandma) to start over, and give me a better life. We talk about the strength that takes, the red flags she encountered, and how it changed her to be more independent, and resilient. We then talk about Francesco, how he impacted her life, and how he will always be the son in law she always wanted.

With my grief, I HATED when people would tell me to "just move on". For the longest time I thought there was something wrong with me. I kept trying to "move on" to make everyone else around me happy, but it just wouldn't work. What I learned with time, is that there wasn't something wrong with me, there was something wrong with the advice that was being given to me. There is no such thing as moving on from a loved one, and I am so sorry if someone made you feel otherwise. When someone makes such an impact on your life they become a part of you, even if they aren't here physically. The memories they left you and the values they taught you will carry on within you forever. We don't ever move on, we move forward.

I had so much time to reflect after Francesco passed away. Taking time off social media allowed me to understand my life in a way I never did before. With my own personal experience with grief, I did a lot of reflecting, and learned so much about who I am. I started to understand the things that I do that I love, and the things I've done that I don't ever want to do again. "To make no mistakes is not the power of man; but from their errors and mistakes, the wise and good learn wisdom for the future"

Have you ever stopped yourself from doing something because you feared the judgement of others? Maybe you even felt limited by the norms that society has built for us. I had an extremely hard time fitting back in with society, and even just feeling "normal" after losing my soulmate. It took a shift in my mentality, and unlocking the power that I carry, setting my authority in my own life. We may feel like our brain controls us, but once you realize you control the brain, your life changes.

In this interview I sit down with Francesco's father Joe LoPresti. I started dating his son in 2013, and at the time not being raised with the same culture caused a huge barrier between his parents and I. Today, we sit down to talk about the beautiful evolution of our relationship after having gone through something so traumatic together. I dive into Joe's subconscious thoughts to understand his journey while his son battled cancer, as well as his thoughts now while he tries to navigate this world without him. Thank you for allowing Joe to be vulnerable by opening his heart on a subject so sensitive to him.