309: Why Can’t I Orgasm?

Sexless marriage doesn't have to be a life sentence. Belah Rose joins Kyle, Alana and Tiera to share how one husband went from 15 years of nothing to his wife initiating twice in a week, and the simple first move that can start your turnaround. Watch the episode on YouTube!! Our Products: Finishing Well Orgasm Course!! Out Of Sync Audio Course Resources: Delight Your Marriage website ⁠My Counselor Online⁠ ⁠Better Help⁠ ⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: 0:00 – Hook & open 0:20 – Welcome and Facebook group 0:50 – Today's verse: Hebrews 12:1–2 1:16 – Meet Belah Rose of Delight Your Marriage 2:29 – Belah's story: from divorce to helping marriages 8:32 – How marriages end up sexless 13:20 – Out of Sync course 15:11 – What counts as a sexless marriage? 15:24 – Coaching husbands vs. wives 20:20 – What emotional safety really means 24:14 – "My husband wants it all the time and I'm not interested" 27:24 – Won't she think I'm only changing for sex? 30:47 – How couples start undoing sexlessness 36:10 – Practical first steps 41:07 – What "wholeheartedly cherished" looks like 43:32 – What if I don't even know my wife? 46:57 – Wrap-up: the power of making the first move 49:08 – Where to find Belah 49:52 – Closing prayer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Looking sexy and feeling sexy are two different things, and the KS Team breaks down why. Learn how the brakes-and-accelerators work, why more lingerie won't help if your foot is still on the brake, and grab a simple exercise to try with your spouse this week! Tune in!! Watch the episode on YouTube!! Our Products: Finishing Well Orgasm Course!!!! Out Of Sync Audio Course Resources: Kait Tomlin's ⁠IG post My Counselor Online⁠ ⁠Better Help⁠ ⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: 0:00 – Episode sneak peek and Welcome 0:41 – Today's verse: John 6:40 0:57 – Looking sexy vs. feeling sexy 5:48 – The myth of "I'll feel sexy when…" 9:00 – What actually makes us feel sexy (and what makes a wife feel seen) 12:17 – Finishing Well course 13:12 – The accelerator and brake analogy 15:25 – Spectatoring 16:44 – Hormones, cycles and desire 23:00 – Common brakes and accelerators 25:56 – Faith, purity culture and "Can Christian women be sexy?" 31:10 – Song of Songs and receiving a compliment 32:20 – How to feel sexier this week 38:07 – Things to do together 39:28 – Prayer and takeaways 40:16 – Closing prayer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Think your spouse’s habits are a green flag, a red flag, or just a “nothing burger”? Tune in to hear the KS team chat through some scenarios that our Instagram followers once wondered, "Is this normal?" Some of them are going to surprise you... Watch the episode on YouTube!! Our Episodes: Joey Odom episode: Less Phone More Intimacy Is Your Phone Ruining Your Marriage? episode Morgan Cutlip: Mental Load Our Products: Finishing Well Orgasm Course!!!! Out Of Sync Audio Course Figuring Out What I Like Guide Resources: ⁠My Counselor Online⁠ ⁠Better Help⁠ ⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: 00:00 – Open and welcome 00:31 – Show intro and today's verse (Ephesians 4:15) 01:02 – Instagram questions and a sponsor break 01:35 – Setting up the green, yellow and red flag game 03:12 – Sleeping in separate rooms because of snoring 04:16 – Tangent on nose strips 04:50 – Different bedtimes (11 PM vs. 3:30 AM) 07:03 – Husband plays video games after work 09:45 – Too much phone time (the daughter yelling "daddy") 10:46 – Husband cooks and preps meals, wife cleans up 11:16 – Never having an orgasm with penetration 12:00 – Couples who don't watch the same shows 14:30 – Promo for the Out of Sync course on mismatched libido 15:50 – Wife rejects intimacy before a work trip, then helps herself when he's gone 16:36 – Two king-size beds pushed together 18:38 – Trusting your husband about porn or cheating 19:20 – Wife wants to be led but won't give up control 20:12 – Wife leaves her shoes everywhere (and the shoes-in-the-house tangent) 22:19 – Couples who don't talk while eating 24:10 – Getting ready for bed at different times 24:50 – Husband loses his erection during long foreplay 25:36 – Wife doesn't know what turns her on 26:10 – Closing round: a green flag in each host's marriage 27:10 – Wrap-up and sign-off 27:41 – Closing prayer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ever wondered if finishing at the same time is the secret to great sex?? Or how to even do it? Tiera, Alana, and Kyle keep it real about timing, communication, and trying practical ways to get in sync- without turning the bedroom into a performance! Watch the episode on YouTube!! Our Products: Finishing Well Orgasm Course!!!! Out Of Sync Audio Course Resources: ⁠My Counselor Online⁠ ⁠Better Help⁠ ⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: 00:00 — Intro, podcast mission, and the new orgasm course 01:25 — Audience poll on whether couples finish together 03:17 — Why do couples want to orgasm at the same time? 04:02 — Assuming everyone finishes together before marriage 05:16 — Learning each spouse’s path to orgasm 06:10 — Talking about arousal, interruptions, and cues 07:05 — Giving the slower-to-orgasm partner a head start 08:06 — Same-time orgasm is optional, not better sex 09:04 — Coordinating timing beyond penetration 10:16 — Preparing for transitions and staying present 11:35 — Communicating before the finish line 13:40 — Planning for when timing doesn’t match 14:06 — Treating it as teamwork and experimentation 15:40 — No single position makes it happen automatically 16:01 — Tips for slowing down and reducing sensation 17:44 — Using a stop signal to delay climax 19:26 — Reducing stimulation by stopping movement 20:10 — Communicating clearly and keeping what works 21:02 — Adjusting pace and reading each other’s cues 22:19 — Listener tips and real-world examples 25:25 — Learning each other’s rhythms with practice 26:30 — Why some couples take turns instead 27:15 — Final takeaway: mutual enjoyment over finishing together Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode mentions self harm and infidelity. Please listen with care. Carl and Laura Lentz kick off our 'Real Marriage' series! It's a raw, honest conversation about infidelity, rebuilding trust, and the hard work of healing! This is a conversation about what it really takes to rebuild a marriage from the inside out. Pre-order their new book now! 10 Conversations That Heal The Hurt Preorder Watch the episode on YouTube!! Our Products: Finishing Well Orgasm Course Out Of Sync Audio Course Resources: Codependent No More Lights On Podcast 10 Conversations That Heal The Hurt Preorder ⁠My Counselor Online⁠ ⁠Better Help⁠ ⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: 00:00 — Episode Hook: Facing Betrayal 00:15 — Kingdom Sexuality Podcast Introduction 01:02 — Sponsor Break 01:15 — Meet Carl and Laura Lentz 03:42 — How They Met 05:15 — Early Marriage and Sexual Expectations 08:10 — Betrayal, Infidelity, and the Breaking Point 12:45 — Choosing Healing Over Immediate Decisions 16:34 — Helping Their Children Through the Crisis 17:34 — Public Scrutiny and Starting Over 23:41 — The “Street Pharmacist” Story 25:24 — Rebuilding in Private 29:11 — Therapy, Trauma, and Doing the Work 31:59 — Rebuilding Emotional and Sexual Intimacy 39:38 — Navigating Different Desires 42:51 — Learning How to Love Each Other Better 46:10 — A Myth About Christian Sexuality 48:18 — Rapid-Fire Questions 49:21 — Where to Find Carl and Laura 49:51 — Closing Prayer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you have ever wondered whether a Christian woman can use a vibrator to help her orgasm, this conversation gives you a biblical framework instead of shame or guesswork! Plus Tiera and Alana even give you a sneak peek into what the toy section looks like in the Finishing Well orgasm course! (Use code FINISHING30 to get 30% off for a limited time!) Watch the episode on YouTube!! Our Products: Finishing Well Orgasm Course! code FINISHING30 for 30% off for a limited time! ⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: 00:00 — Opening: Faith, Sex, and Orgasms 00:31 — Course Reminder, Verse, and Sponsor Break 01:03 — Is It Okay to Use Sex Toys in Marriage? 03:19 — Questions Couples Should Consider 03:51 — Communication, Consent, and Prayer 04:26 — Needing More Stimulation Is Normal 05:28 — Reassurance for Husbands 06:01 — Can Vibrators Create Dependence? 07:08 — There’s No “More Spiritual” Way to Orgasm 07:38 — Inside the Course: Toy Education and Demonstrations 09:12 — How the Course Supports Couples 09:49 — Course Sale and Enrollment Details 10:50 — Participant Testimonial 12:24 — Closing Thoughts and Prayer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Multiple orgasms aren’t a gold standard - they’re simply one possible part of a sex life and can be a fun thing to work towards! If you can have one orgasm and you’re curious about exploring more, tune into as the KS team chats multiples and about their new Finishing Well orgasm course! Code FINISHING30 to get it 30% off! Watch the episode on YouTube!! Our Products: Finishing Well Orgasm Course: FINISHING30 for 30% off for a limited time!! ⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: 00:00 — Opening banter 00:08 — Welcome and episode introduction 00:33 — Series and course introduction 01:04 — Psalm 100:5 02:08 — Sponsor break 02:39 — What multiple orgasms are—and aren’t 03:16 — Defining multiple orgasms 04:20 — How seasons of life affect sexual exploration 05:40 — Why multiple orgasms are possible 06:45 — Creating the right conditions 07:24 — Practical ways to explore 09:03 — Communication with your spouse 09:38 — Course overview 11:18 — Prioritizing marital health 11:49 — Offer and bonus course 12:20 — Closing prayer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Husbands - this is the part nobody tells you: your wife’s orgasm is not a project. Because guess what? Pressure kills arousal!! Men, tune in to hear how you can support your wife in this process. Use the code FINISHING30 to get our new Finishing Well Orgasm Course for 30% off! Watch the episode on YouTube!! Our Products: Finishing Well Orgasm Course: code FINISHING30 for 30% off ⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: 00:00 — Welcome & course introduction 01:12 — Why husbands are part of the journey 01:57 — Creating safety, not pressure 03:41 — What pressure feels like in practice 04:11 — Learning your wife’s needs and anatomy 05:52 — Celebrating progress beyond orgasm 07:13 — Showing up with a positive attitude 08:20 — How husbands can introduce the course 08:59 — Going at a comfortable pace & the guarantee 10:18 — Closing prayer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

"Why can’t I orgasm?" For a lot of women, the answer is not a simple fix, and it is definitely not “something is wrong with you.” This episode kicks off a limited mini-series on the female orgasm and gives you a clearer path forward if you’ve ever wondered what your body needs to get there!! Plus, you'll hear the team talk about their new orgasm course: Finishing Well! Get it for 30% off with the code FINISHING30 for a limited time. Watch the episode on YouTube!! Our Products: ⁠Finishing Well Orgasm Course: use code FINISHING30 to get it 30% off for a limited time! ⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: 00:00 — Why orgasm may not be happening 00:05 — Welcome and episode series introduction 01:10 — Verse of the day 01:40 — You are not broken 02:15 — Why the course was created 02:45 — Alana’s story 04:21 — Understanding your anatomy 06:38 — The accelerator-and-brakes framework 08:44 — Identifying what may be holding you back 09:52 — What the course includes 10:55 — Why a personalized approach matters 12:02 — Time commitment and next steps 13:19 — Closing prayer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Christians have been talking about sex for years, but somehow orgasm still feels like the topic we’re supposed to whisper about. But no longer. Tune in as the KS team announces their biggest project yet: ⁠Finishing Well: The Orgasm Course.⁠ Use the code FINISHING 30 to get it 30% off for a limited time! ⁠Watch the episode on YouTube!!⁠ Our Products: ⁠Finishing Well Orgasm Course: use code FINISHING30 to get it 30% off for a limited time!⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Join Unite & Ignite ⁠⁠⁠ Want more from Kingdom Sexuality? Come hang out! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Approximate Time Stamps: Opening and episode intro 01:04 — Sponsor message 01:38 — Introducing the Finishing Well course 04:27 — Why Christians should talk about orgasm 10:01 — Where to find the course and trailer 11:03 — Launch-week offer and bonus course 11:34 — Why the course is priced this way 14:27 — Final offer and closing prayer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices