Montego Bay, Marriage & Messy Growth #HMAY Ep. 256

PRE-ORDER FATHER YOURSELF FIRST TODAYIs wanting vulnerability the same as being ready to hold it? A newlywed (90-something days in!) loves her husband but admits his past trauma makes openness slow. Then the Holy Spirit hits her with two checks: “Can you handle what he gives you?” and “Steward well what he gives you.” We unpack what “safe space” really costs: capacity, patience, and practice. 💛We talk:🧩 Capacity ≠ desire: Wanting all the feelings isn’t the same as being able to carry them—growth over pass/fail.📦 Steward what you have: Treat disclosures like a fragile package—follow “handling instructions,” even if unspoken.🤫 Sometimes love is quiet: Hold space, resist fixing, let him finish, respond later with care.🧑🏾‍🤝‍🧑🏾 He needs his people: Spouse ≠ only container—think therapist, mentors, men’s community, real accountability.🛡️ Protect each other & the mission: Boundaries are holy; honesty and safety can coexist.How did you build capacity to be a safer place for your partner’s truth? Drop a tip for the wedding party. Episode 260 is live—tap in!

A brother wrote in after a three-year long-distance rollercoaster where tough talks turned into silence and her parents turned hostile. He prayed for an approval and called it a sign while every other sign said no. We laugh, we side-eye, and we keep it loving but honest. 😂🙏🏾We talk:🙅🏾‍♂️ Stop over-spiritualizing dating. God is not a vending machine or a green light on command.🚫🏠 Racism in your own home is a hard no. You cannot change being Black and you shouldn’t try to survive where you aren’t respected.🤐 Silence is not depth. Stonewalling and hiding are patterns, not personality quirks.🎆 Chemistry is fireworks. 🧯 Compatibility is fire safety. Choose the relationship that chooses you back.🧹 Unfollow, block, and heal. Get a real therapist and find mentors 10 to 15 years ahead in the season you want, where mutual respect is obvious.Ever turned a red flag into a “sign” and had to course-correct later? Tell us how you knew. Episode 259 is live.

A 27-year-old listener in a three-year poly relationship wants simple guardrails—tell me when you’re out with someone else, if you’re spending the night, and shut it down if they try to edge me out. He resists, agrees begrudgingly, then doesn’t follow through. She’s financially stuck, sharing a cramped place he pays for, and wonders when it’s time to plan her exit. 🛡️💔We talk:“You wrote us knowing where we stand. Our counsel is to get out.”“He wants more. You want depth. What you desire and what you accept are two different things. One has to change.”“You’re asking for safety, transparency, communication, covering, stability. Those are far easier to build with one person.”“If you truly want that lifestyle, seek voices who live it. We don’t. Our vision is covenant and wholeness.”“The goal in marriage is loving each other into fullness. Fragments won’t make anyone whole.”Have you ever stayed where your needs weren’t respected because leaving felt impossible? What boundary finally moved you toward safety? Episode 258 is live—tap in and tell us your story.

Is God’s will bigger than girl code? ✝️ When a listener in her church circle and her friend’s ex catch real feelings, the trio dynamic—and a friendship—hangs in the balance. She’s prayed the feelings away, he confessed he wants to pursue her, and everyone’s watching to see whether wisdom or worry wins. 💔We talk:“They didn’t guard their hearts.” Staying close after a breakup kept hope alive and blurred boundaries.“Church culture can blur the lines.” You can’t call dibs on people, and friendship circles can make feelings messy.“You want to be with somebody who wants to be with you.” Maturity releases what isn’t yours and resists possessiveness.“Let the Lord’s voice be the loudest in your ear.” Not girl code or guy code—God’s guidance first.“You’re free to pursue if it’s mutual.” Ask, “What’s your plan and how will this be different,” and accept that you might “lose a friend for your future husband.”Have you ever dated within the friend group? How did you balance loyalty and love? Episode 257 is live—tap in and tell us where you draw the line.

What do you do when the man you want to be feels out of reach? 💍🇯🇲 Recorded in Montego Bay while Glen and Yvette celebrate 15 years 🎉, a listener writes in before his own 10-year anniversary: he’s lost motivation, avoids hard conversations, and feels inconsistent in faith and intimacy after weight gain. Without a positive male role model, he’s under a heavy cloud and asking how to lead his family God’s way. ✝️We talk:Glen shares that year 10 was rough too; therapy in 2020 helped him initiate sex and hard conversations again. 🧠💬“Father yourself”: restructure your inner voice with accountable self-talk and kindness while you grow the man. 🗣️❤️🌱Make it practical: schedule sex 📅, commit to a 30-minute walk 🚶‍♂️🚶‍♀️, and listen to a podcast together to spark real dialogue. 🎧Progress over perfection: trim TV and gaming 📺🎮, make one right decision at a time ✅, and stop treating growth like a deadline. ⏳Partnership in real life: give your spouse room to change 🔄, ask specifically for what you need 📝, and contribute to comfort without mind-reading. 🧩Have you ever rebuilt confidence in the middle of a marriage? 💬 What first step actually moved the needle for you? Episode 256 is live from Jamaica 🇯🇲 during Glen and Yvette’s 15th-anniversary trip 🎉.

What do you owe a friend when romance enters the chat? 💔 A listener matched with a guy and told her girls how excited she was—only to learn weeks later that one of them secretly liked him, talked to him, and went on a date. The friend admitted it only after he ghosted her and showed zero remorse. Now the question is clear: where’s the line between shooting your shot and protecting the friendship?We talk:Take inventory: this isn’t the friend you share that kind of news with.Friend vs. homie: keep the group vibe if you want, but downgrade access to your heart.If someone says “I’m hurt,” you acknowledge it—even if you disagree.Loyalty matters: don’t compete with your friends for attention, affection, or “the cupcake.”Years don’t equal trust: 15 years of history doesn’t excuse shady choices.Ever had a friend cross the line on dating etiquette? 🚩 Tell us where you draw the boundary. Episode 255 is live—drop your take in the comments! #HowMarriedAreYou #Friendship #GirlCode #Podcast50% OFF of our E-Course, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Premarital Advantage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠!! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Email list⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Contact Us: [email protected] Us a Voicemail: +1 727-619-4629⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Leave a Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Every week we share with you all exactly how married we are. Now it's your turn! Leave us a voicemail at +1 727-619-4629 or send a voice message to our DM's on the #HMAY Instagram.WAYS TO PARTNER WITH US:Get special access to things we’re working on, extra content from our fam, and more on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.Support us with a one-time gift through ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠PayPal⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.CONNECT WITH US ON INSTAGRAM:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HMAY Podcast IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Glen's IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Yvette's IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Chocolate Babies IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Frank the Puppet's IG ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Yvette Unplugged Podcast ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠WATCH BELEAF IN FATHERHOOD⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Thank you so much for tuning into this episode of How Married Are You?! See you next week!

What happens when the "perfect boyfriend" suddenly explodes? 😳 A listener writes in about her kind, generous dream man—until he shouted, cursed, and loomed over her at 3 AM after she said she felt left out of his hobby-club mixer. Childhood memories of an angry step-dad came rushing back, and now she wonders: if rage shows up once, will it move in after I do? Glen and Yvette weigh safety, trauma, and how much grace is too much.We talk:🚩 He played himself—no one should talk to a partner like that, Glen says, urging her to trust the fear signal.🛑 Glen’s first instinct: leave if he scares you—therapy can’t fix disrespect you tolerate.🔄 Yvette on trauma stacking and how tiny slights pile up until the midnight blow-up feels massive.🎯 Glen explains that if he invites you, he needs you in the hobby—not policing him.🧭 The hosts’ blueprint for clear expectations, compartmentalized friendships, and mentors before marriage.Have you ever loved someone who seemed perfect—until the anger flared? 💥 What told you it was time to walk away or stay? Episode 254 is live—tap in and share your story with #HowMarriedAreYou #HMAY254!

Can a prophetic word outweigh chemistry that’s already lit the fuse? 🕯️ One listener writes in torn between a four‑year, on‑again‑off‑again love and the fear he’s missing the real woman God promised. Childhood trauma, church expectations, and a couple of busted boundaries all collide as he wonders: am I the problem—or am I over‑spiritualizing everything?We talk:🗣️ Make a decision—then make it right.🔍 Consider the source: weigh any prophecy against your own walk with God.🚧 Boundaries only work when you enforce them as the leader.🧠 Your body doing what it’s designed to do isn’t evil—how you act on it matters.🕺🏾 Love her to perfection: argue well, get therapy, keep working the plan.Ever had to choose between a “word from God” and the relationship right in front of you? 💌 Episode 253 is live—tell us how you found clarity! #HowMarriedAreYou #RelationshipRealTalk50% OFF of our E-Course, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Premarital Advantage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠!! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Email list⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Contact Us: [email protected] Us a Voicemail: +1 727-619-4629⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Leave a Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Every week we share with you all exactly how married we are. Now it's your turn! Leave us a voicemail at +1 727-619-4629 or send a voice message to our DM's on the #HMAY Instagram.WAYS TO PARTNER WITH US:Get special access to things we’re working on, extra content from our fam, and more on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.Support us with a one-time gift through ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠PayPal⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.CONNECT WITH US ON INSTAGRAM:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HMAY Podcast IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Glen's IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Yvette's IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Chocolate Babies IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Frank the Puppet's IG ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Yvette Unplugged Podcast ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠WATCH BELEAF IN FATHERHOOD⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Thank you so much for tuning into this episode of How Married Are You?! See you next week!

Can love survive emotional whiplash and a husband who leaves you on the curb? 😶‍🌫️ One listener kept chasing a woman who ping‑ponged between “just friends” and “let’s try again.” Another rushed into marriage for a missions trip—only to discover her new spouse measures quality time in bedroom minutes and once made her walk home after a joke. Both are wondering: Am I crazy for calling it quits—or crazy for stayingWe talk:🙏🏾 “You deserve a clear conversation, not constant confusion.”🛑 Why loneliness inside a relationship can hurt more than being single.👥 The lifesaving power of accountability and community—don’t partner with someone who avoids both.🔄 “Make a decision, then make it right—fear can’t drive your love life.”🗓️ Practical rescue plan: schedule date nights, schedule sex, and get real counseling before calling the movers.Have you ever begged for clarity—or begged for a simple date night? 💭 Drop your story and wisdom below—Episode 252 is live now! #HowMarriedAreYou #HMAY50% OFF of our E-Course, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Premarital Advantage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠!! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Email list⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Contact Us: [email protected] Us a Voicemail: +1 727-619-4629⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Leave a Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Every week we share with you all exactly how married we are. Now it's your turn! Leave us a voicemail at +1 727-619-4629 or send a voice message to our DM's on the #HMAY Instagram.WAYS TO PARTNER WITH US:Get special access to things we’re working on, extra content from our fam, and more on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.Support us with a one-time gift through ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠PayPal⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.CONNECT WITH US ON INSTAGRAM:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HMAY Podcast IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Glen's IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Yvette's IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Chocolate Babies IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Frank the Puppet's IG ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Yvette Unplugged Podcast ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠WATCH BELEAF IN FATHERHOOD⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Thank you so much for tuning into this episode of How Married Are You?! See you next week!

A 26‑year‑old listener feels sparks 🔥 with a 35‑year‑old pastor, but her dad and step‑mom insist, “He’s too old!” Now she’s weighing wisdom, faith ✝️, and a widening generation gap 🕰️. Can she trust her own maturity—and God’s timing—over her family’s fears?We talk: 🙏🏾 Why shared faith, values, and life vision matter more than the number on a birth certificate🚩 How repeating “much younger” partners can hint at deeper immaturity or control issues📝 Using premarital coaching and mentors to see compatibility with clear eyes—not just butterflie 👨‍👩‍👧 Balancing family concerns with wisdom from couples who live the kind of marriage you want🌱 Spotting true maturity through character and growth, not calendar yearsEver crossed a 10‑year age gap? ⏳ What convinced you it could work—or that it couldn’t? Episode 251 is live—tap in and share your story in the comments! 50% OFF of our E-Course, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Premarital Advantage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠!! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The Email list⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Contact Us: [email protected] Us a Voicemail: +1 727-619-4629⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Leave a Review⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Every week we share with you all exactly how married we are. Now it's your turn! Leave us a voicemail at +1 727-619-4629 or send a voice message to our DM's on the #HMAY Instagram.WAYS TO PARTNER WITH US:Get special access to things we’re working on, extra content from our fam, and more on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.Support us with a one-time gift through ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠PayPal⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.CONNECT WITH US ON INSTAGRAM:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠HMAY Podcast IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Glen's IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Yvette's IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Chocolate Babies IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Frank the Puppet's IG ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Yvette Unplugged Podcast ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠WATCH BELEAF IN FATHERHOOD⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Thank you so much for tuning into this episode of How Married Are You?! See you next week!