Sleeping Our Way to Nowhere

Send us a textHi gorgeous girls! It’s been awhile since we caught up and so much has happened. What’s new with us? Well, LA burned down, TikTok was banned for about 5 seconds, both of us are engaged, but also not. What else? Oh, and we’re getting a divorce.

Send us a textHAPPY NEW YEAR DIVA DIVA DIVAS! Can someone please tell us what 2024 was? Actually don’t answer that question. This week’s episode is a full Q&A dedicated to the girls who need answers or have a story that gives Hot and Bothered vibes. Chris and Cedar are giving new year, same horrible, unexplainable advice — duh! If you’re still sulking in 2024 energy please eat a banana and go sit in the sun (or tanning bed). 2025 is going to be HOT xx

Send us a textHOLIDAY EPISODE INCOMING! Cedar and Chris are stocking up on men and Birkins this holiday season and suggest you do the same! The duo reveal their holiday plans and immediately spiral while debating driving home versus flying. Carpooling? Not an option, ever. Chris reflects on his 2024, obviously is a grateful queen and has to brag about his “accomplishments”. A Christmas Miracle has happened to Cedar. In love with men — the ENTIRE population of men? What is going on? 2025 is going to be insane… Happy Holidays xx

Send us a textHi Divas! This week the two share their hot takes on Hollywood’s newest and hottest star: Luigi Mangione. Chris has a slight breakdown about his career journey while reflecting on 2024 and comparing himself to the people around him. Why is social climbing so hard?Cedar talks about her fear of possibly losing her independence while being wrapped up in a relationship — I think this has all happened to us once… or twice before. Are the two delusional? Are they girl bosses? Are they working harder not smarter? Are they afraid of love? They need answers and new therapists. x 

Send us a textOn this week’s episode, Cedar and Chris spiral as they have the fleeting thought: “What if our exes had a podcast?” Would they listen? They also discuss a recurring phenomenon: Why does the ex-fling always manage to ruin a good manic episode? And how the “genuine” concern never feels genuine. Cedar talks about dick pics — solicited vs unsolicited. Bonus points if you can get creative! Chris gets into the semantics of IG followers while Cedar reveals her detective skills. Has anyone ever tried bath salts? X 

Send us a textThis week’s episode is full of surprises. Cedar shares her experience meeting with a psychic who gives her a ton of information she was not expecting. The revelations she experienced may have affected her sexual identity… Is she coming out? A phase? What’s going on here? Chris also comes out this episode, but as a feminist (Cedar has never been more proud). The two ramble about compliments — when is too much too much? And of course there is some “gaslighting” sprinkled in the mix. As you know, do NOT take anything they say seriously x 

Send us a textThis week Cedar and Chris talk about their anxieties around the holidays: counting calories at Thanksgiving dinner, the familial guilt that heightens at this time of year, and all that fun stuff. They also touch on the misery of not only experiencing Black Friday, but working it… horrible. Chris and Cedar dive into how important it is to have alone time with your friends when you can be so seemingly wrapped up in a relationship. We all need alone time, and your friends need alone time WITHOUT your boyfriend there — I think we can all agree. The latter half of this ep features a quick Q&A from the gorgeous girlies who need their gorgeous questions answered. Enjoy x

Send us a textCedar and Chris open this week’s episode with a once in a lifetime, duet performance that will leave you sick to your stomach! But don’t worry, they quickly get right back on track as Cedar continues to profess her love for her one and only while Chris attempts to explain that inexplainable connection we are all lusting for. The co-hosts do a deep dive on “love” and drunkenly try to reassure themselves that they have cracked the code on how to determine if the feeling is healthy… or if it’s just a feeling. Other topics include: lingering, unwanted sleepovers, and a couple more delusional bits to add to their rulebook.

Send us a textThis week, Chris and Cedar air their grievances with the most recent presidential election. A short and sweet episode to talk through some of the feelings *most* of us are experiencing regarding the outcome, and wrapping it up with some of the most unserious banter possible provided by Chris Bruno himself.

Send us a textHappy Election Day! Get out and vote, but remember that no one should tell you what to do with your body… interpret that how you wish. This week, Cedar reminds everyone to be mindful of the fact that when choosing your next boyfriend, you’re also choosing him for everyone else in your life. Chris deep dives on douching —because some self-care routines cross all relationship lines. Join us for another episode of manic chaos! x