GBU 529: How To Go To Hell

Today, we’re talking hell, and how to go there. You might be surprised to learn there are a bunch of different hells. Like when a dog goes to dog heaven. But worse. We also talk about thoughtcrime, hedonism, the dictionary, limbo, and before we leave, you can play along with our quiz at the end. See how you score on Hell!Our work here is supported by patrons, so if you’d like to get ALL of our episodes, not just the freebies, join us here for six bucks (or, if you’re smart, use The URL In The Episode to pay only five!) Your patronage comes with a free membership to America’s Best Discord Server and funds our continued research, writing and recording.* natalie & drew This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe

We learn about the new trend where influencers try to lay the biggest logs they can, detailing their diet and techniques as they do so. We also investigate the theory that murder isn’t real, learn why cops can’t solve crimes, and a few other ideas along the way.* drew & natalieSubscribe to Garbage Brain University and you’ll get over 400 patron-only episodes, as well as access to our subscriber-only Discord community. You’ll also help us continue to write and record these episodes. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe

From robotic bidets that pee on themselves to corporations who want a camera and sensors inside all of our toilets, the world seems increasingly interested in our bodily outputs. We tell you who’s watching and how much they’re charging you for the privilege. Also: how to become the state’s cheapest lawyer, the infiltration of anti-homeless architecture, and the snack you’ve never seen which was apparently eaten by millions.Become a patron and you’ll get every episode of The Great Mistake plus 400+ more patron-only episodes!• natalie & drew This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe

Today, we talk dwarves, gnomes, the armpit caterpillar, lotion, spaghetti, how to drive fast, how to achieve serenity, why serenity is boring, convenience, the desire/shame cycle, being in trouble, and much more.• natalie & drew This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe

Today, we talked spiders, power outages, air quality, borders, why nobody's going to save the USA, capitalism, the CIA, OnlyFans, incels, AI girlfriends, crack, and the surprising lives of people who physically have no brains.* natalie & drew This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe

We talk about why “grandma hobbies” isn’t so much a trend as something you might want to do as a matter of being alive in the same way other human beings are alive. We also dig into one man’s near-death Jesus-based experience, incels, the wheel of reincarnation, the “slippery slope,” kompromat, Spotify, arts and crafts, and why Amazon sells counterfeit soap.• natalie & drew This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe

Today, we talk Baby Keem, Morrissey, Aleister Crowley, solar power, air conditioning, Prison Planet Theory, the “elites,” plastic, and why you should stop reading the news. If you’d like to hear more, unlock over 400 patron-only episodes by subscribing. You’ll also get access to our members-only Discord server!• natalie & drew This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe

Why are everyone's parents so weird? What happened before the moon was in our orbit? And how do we commit class war in a way that complies with Terms Of Service? We talk about these ideas and more in today's Drew & Natalie Have A Normal Conversation.• natalie & drew This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe

We tell you about psychic dogs, squirrels who spy on human beings, and how technology companies are doing a denial-of-service attack on all of us. Free for all to listen.If you haven’t patronized us yet, do it now! Your patronage gives you access to all 462 episodes of our shows (most are patron-only) and our private Discord server.• natalie & drew This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe

* Welcome mats are a conspiracy* Instagram reel mind control* Why they're trying to make us wear cameras* Why people don't realize they're people yet* The end of the world, as predicted on TikTok* Our reincarnation plans* How to get trillions of listeners to your podcast* We gazed into the abyss: what happened next will surprise you* Why men say eyelashes are gay* The world of Looksmaxxing* Gangstalking and how to do it- natalie & drew This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe