Coaching with Sarah: How To Ask For Help From the Right People (And Then, How to Accept It)

Part of burnout recovery is learning when to respond to what your body and life are telling you, even when that response brings some discomfort.In this episode, Cait and Sarah talk openly about a shift in how they work together and what’s ahead for FRIED. As their roles and priorities have evolved, Sarah is stepping back and Cait is focusing her work more fully on leadership, organizational, and systems-level burnout.Cait shares how she came to see that her work is strongest when she is creating change at a broader level, working with leaders, teams, and organizations. Sarah reflects on realizing that supporting others through burnout had taken the place of rebuilding her own life, and what became clear once she chose to redirect her energy back toward herself.The conversation reflects the longer arc of burnout recovery. It speaks to how clarity often comes later than expected, how rebuilding tends to happen in stages, and how fit becomes clearer through experience rather than planning. What Cait and Sarah describe will feel familiar to anyone who has had to respond to a change they did not anticipate but ultimately knew they could not ignore.Episode Breakdown:00:00 Conscious Business Uncoupling and Burnout Recovery Alignment03:29 Why Burn Bold Shifted From Individual Burnout Recovery to Workplace Burnout04:28 The Values Bridge Assessment and How It Exposes Misalignment08:29 Codependency in Helping Roles and Burnout From Borrowed Purpose11:18 Ending a Business Partnership Without Blame or Failure18:59 Why You Cannot Force Alignment Through Planning Alone28:34 Why Transitions Feel So Hard According to Chinese Medicine31:43 Workplace Burnout vs Misalignment and Why Not Everything Is Toxic38:16 Using Your Voice and Finding the Work That Fits42:34 Why Burnout Recovery Still Requires Support and GuidanceLinksBook Cait to Speak at your Event or OrgSchedule a Speaking Inquiry with CaitCait Donovan is a keynote speaker, author, and host of FRIED: The Burnout Podcast, specializing in burnout, mis/match, and sustainable performance at work. She partners with corporate leaders, teams, and professional associations through keynotes, workshops, and leadership sessions that treat burnout as data, not failure, to help organizations reduce burnout without blame or shame and build healthier, high performing cultures.To bring Cait to your organization or event, book an inquiry call here: https://bit.ly/bookcaitPodcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Burnout recovery does not start with fixing yourself. It starts with understanding job fit, burnout at work, and whether there is a true values match between who you are and what your work and life demand.Cait Donovan returns with a #straightfromcait episode that marks a turning point in how she thinks about burnout and in the writing of her next book. After years of explaining burnout as a complex web shaped by childhood, culture, health, personality, and work, she hits a wall. Information alone does not change behavior. What people need is a clearer way to see why burnout keeps showing up and what actually drives it beneath the surface.That insight leads to a powerful reframe. Burnout at work is often the result of poor job fit and ongoing misalignment, not personal weakness or bad leadership. Cait unpacks how mismatches around autonomy, expectations, and success quietly drain energy over time. More freedom does not always help. Promotion does not always equal growth. What happens when your role conflicts with your values or asks for something you cannot sustain? And how often do we accept those mismatches without ever questioning them?This episode also sets the direction for what comes next on the podcast. Cait shares how future conversations will focus on creating better alignment through values match, mattering, hope, and leadership at work. The invitation is simple and challenging. What would change if fit mattered as much as performance? And how much burnout could be prevented if mismatch was addressed before it turned into exhaustion?Episode Breakdown:00:00 Burnout as a Mismatch Problem02:29 Job Fit, Autonomy, and Burnout at Work04:47 Values Match and Redefining Success05:43 How Better Alignment Reduces BurnoutLinksBook Cait to Speak at your Event or OrgSchedule a Speaking Inquiry with CaitPodcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Burnout is less a breaking point than a slow unravelling of identity and the seven messy phases high achievers cycle through on the way back to themselves.We’re revisiting a conversation with Dr. Mandy Lehto that still holds relevance for anyone who has pushed past their limits and felt the ground shift beneath them. Mandy and Cait talk through burnout as a gradual process shaped by denial, urgency, over-efforting, and grief, rather than a single moment of collapse. Mandy’s “seven-ish” buckets offer language for patterns many high achievers recognize but rarely name. When the strategies that once drove success stop working, how do you begin to make sense of what comes next?Burnout is framed here as an identity reckoning rather than a problem to fix or outwork. It often surfaces when performance quietly replaces self-trust and effort becomes the main source of worth. What happens when pushing harder no longer brings clarity or relief? What does it ask of you when the body stops cooperating with the plan?The episode invites a different relationship with healing. One that allows uncertainty, grief, and slowness to exist without turning them into another project. Wholeness does not arrive as polish or resolution. It shows up through honesty, embodiment, and the growing ability to stop performing for approval. For anyone navigating the space between who they were trained to be and who they are becoming, this episode offers perspective, language, and permission to stay with the process.Episode Breakdown:00:00 The Seven Phases of Burnout Recovery for High Achievers01:35 Denial and the Push-Harder Pattern That Starts the Slide06:38 Triage Mode and Why Your Worth Can Feel Tied to Productivity15:19 Reluctant Surrender and the Grief of Losing Your Old Identity19:10 The Humbling and What Acceptance Actually Looks Like30:31 Achievement Addiction, Dopamine, and the Crash After Big Wins39:02 Chutes and Ladders and Practicing Self-Acceptance in Real Life42:28 Wholeness Equals Whole Mess and Reclaiming Your Energy47:14 When Support Helps Most and Why Recovery Becomes an Inside JobIf today’s episode sparked ideas for your team, Cait is available for keynotes, workshops, and leadership sessions. Learn more here: https://caitdonovan.as.me/inquireConnect with Mandy Lehto:Visit Mandy's Website Follow Mandy on InstagramConnect with Mandy on LinkedInBook Cait to Speak: https://bit.ly/bookcaitPodcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

What if you could step into a room filled with the people who hold the keys to the big stages, the book deals, and the most powerful platforms for your voice? The Gateway Gathering Pitch Fest is a visibility accelerator for thought-leaders. Whether you’re ready to pitch or just want to discover what’s possible, join us January 13 – 15. Visit: https://bit.ly/friedgatewayWhy do millennials seem more exhausted than everyone else, and what does that say about the world they came of age in? Cait Donovan and Tess Brigham challenge the idea that burnout is caused by laziness, entitlement, or bad time management and instead look at the conditions that shaped an entire generation’s relationship to work, money, and ambition.Millennials were taught to chase fulfillment through work while absorbing the expectation of constant availability, rising debt, and shrinking financial stability. That combination created a version of success that looked good on paper but often felt unsustainable in real life. Burnout, in this light, reads less like a personal breakdown and more like a rational response to a system that never powered down.The conversation also reframes generational tension as misunderstanding rather than failure. Gen Z’s boundaries and openness around mental health are not rejections of effort. They are adaptations shaped by watching what relentless grind actually costs. What looks like resistance may be awareness.This episode asks a quieter but harder question: what happens when the path you committed to no longer fits who you are or the life you want? Burnout becomes an invitation to reassess rather than a reason for shame. Less judgment, more curiosity, and the courage to question stories about success that were never designed to hold up under the weight they now carry.Episode Breakdown:00:00 Why Burnout Is a Generational Issue, Not a Personal Failure01:15 Tess Brigham on Her Quarter-Life Crisis and Early Burnout09:25 Why Millennials Experience Burnout Differently Than Other Generations19:26 Student Debt, Financial Pressure, and the Burnout Equation30:11 Mental Health, Boundaries, and What Gen Z Is Doing Differently39:03 When Burnout Signals It’s Time to Reassess Your PathConnect with Tess Brigham:Visit Tess' Website Follow Tess on Instagram Connect with Tess on LinkedInConnect with Cait:Initial Call with CaitBurnout Recovery works better with support. UNFRIED is our small group (6 people max!) coaching program to help guide you through your recovery. Find out more here: http://bit.ly/unfriedIf this episode resonated and you’re not sure where to go next, the FRIED Episode Finder can guide you to the next right listen: https://bit.ly/friedfinderWhat if you could step into a room filled with the people who hold the keys to the big stages, the book deals, and the most powerful platforms for your voice? The Gateway Gathering Pitch Fest is a visibility accelerator for thought-leaders. Whether you’re ready to pitch or just want to discover what’s possible, join us January 13 – 15. Visit: https://bit.ly/friedgatewayPodcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

What if you could step into a room filled with the people who hold the keys to the big stages, the book deals, and the most powerful platforms for your voice? The Gateway Gathering Pitch Fest is a visibility accelerator for thought-leaders. Whether you’re ready to pitch or just want to discover what’s possible, join us January 13 – 15. Visit https://bit.ly/friedgatewayStress pushes high-achieving women toward alcohol and alcohol quietly erodes sleep emotional stability and clarity.Cait Donovan welcomes back Casey McGuire Davidson, host of the Hello Someday podcast and a trusted voice for sober-curious women, to examine a pattern many women experience without fully naming. Alcohol is often positioned as relief, reward, and sophistication, yet over time it can leave women feeling more anxious, more reactive, and less resilient in their daily lives.Rather than treating drinking as a moral issue or a personal failure, the focus stays on information and awareness. How does alcohol affect sleep and emotional regulation? What shifts when hormones change in midlife? How much of what feels like stress, burnout, or anxiety might be amplified by something we were told would help? Removing alcohol, even briefly, becomes a way to see your real baseline and understand what your body and nervous system are actually asking for.This episode is an invitation to experiment with curiosity instead of judgment. What might you learn about yourself if you stopped numbing for a month? What becomes possible when rest feels deeper, moods feel steadier, and choices feel more conscious? Dry January is framed less as a challenge and more as a chance to gather clarity and decide what truly supports the life you are building.Episode Breakdown:00:00 Meet Casey McGuire Davidson02:00 How Stress and Alcohol Reinforce Each Other06:00 Alcohol’s Impact on Sleep, Anxiety, and Emotional Regulation18:05 Perimenopause, Hormones, and Changing Alcohol Tolerance23:55 A Practical and Sustainable Approach to Dry JanuaryConnect with Casey McGuire Davidson:Casey’s Website Follow Casey on Instagram  Connect with Casey on LinkedIn Get The Free 30-Day Sober Guide To Quitting DrinkingHire Cait to Speak:Initial Call with CaitIf you’re tired and can’t quite name why, this is a good place to start. Cait’s free Core Values guide helps you figure out what’s draining you and what’s worth protecting. Grab it here: https://bit.ly/corevaluesfreebieWhat if you could step into a room filled with the people who hold the keys to the big stages, the book deals, and the most powerful platforms for your voice? The Gateway Gathering Pitch Fest is a visibility accelerator for thought-leaders. Whether you’re ready to pitch or just want to discover what’s possible, join us January 13 – 15. Visit https://bit.ly/friedgatewayPodcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Winter fear can feel like burnout recovery slipping away but this episode reframes fear and depletion as a natural part of winter rather than a sign of winter burnout or failure. In this #sarahshares episode, Sarah Vosen speaks directly to the quiet panic that surfaces when low energy and fear return during the darkest part of the year. When light fades and energy pulls inward, burnout recovery can feel fragile. Fear often replaces simple exhaustion, especially when the nervous system is already depleted. Sarah offers a grounding reframe. That fear is not proof you are backsliding. It is information. Winter exposes depletion more clearly, which can feel unsettling, but it also invites a different response.Instead of pushing through or overriding low energy, the conversation centers on safety, rest, and conservation. What does safety actually feel like in your body? What helps you settle when fear is loud and rest feels out of reach? Winter is not asking for progress or productivity. It is asking for care, containment, and trust that restoration often begins when you stop fighting the dark.Episode Breakdown:00:00 Embracing Winter's Wisdom05:06 Understanding Fear in Winter09:47 Seeking Safety and Self-Care17:10 Navigating Hibernation and RestorationRelated episodes you might want to listen to next:Irrational Fears are a Sign of DepletionBurnout and SleepDig deeper:Burnout isn’t a personal failure or a lack of resilience. It’s a signal that something in the system, expectations, roles, pace, or support, is out of alignment. Conversations like this one help surface the human experience of burnout, while the broader work continues to explore how organizations can respond more intelligently and sustainably.To explore burnout, leadership, and sustainable performance through a workplace and organizational lens, connect with Cait Donovan: https://bit.ly/bookcaitLearn more about Cait’s speaking work: https://www.caitdonovan.com/speakingShort on time? Watch this 3-minute overview: https://bit.ly/caitdreel2025Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Burnout recovery starts when you stop treating self-sufficiency as strength and learn how to ask for help without shame.In this Coaching session, Sarah Vosen sits down with Samira, a longtime listener facing burnout rooted in over-responsibility, financial stress, and a habit of doing everything alone. Rest has started to bring back some energy, yet doubt remains. What if it is still not enough? What if needing support means something is wrong?At the heart of this conversation is the realization that self-reliance often begins as protection. When early attempts to ask for help led to disappointment, independence became the safest path. Over time, that strategy can quietly turn into isolation and exhaustion. Sarah reframes resilience as something built through receiving rather than pushing harder and invites Samira to see that she can learn how to ask for help and build it as a skill.They also explore how support works best when expectations are clear and realistic. Not everyone in our lives can meet every emotional need. Some people bring calm. Others bring practical relief. Releasing unmet expectations can soften resentment and make space for real support to land.This episode invites reflection on long-held beliefs about strength and worth. What changes when asking for help feels neutral rather than shameful? What becomes possible when support is treated as nourishment rather than failure? Burnout recovery begins at the roots, and sometimes the bravest step is allowing yourself to receive.Episode Breakdown:00:00 Burnout Recovery and the Cost of Self-Reliance03:09 Why Asking for Help Feels Unsafe08:58 Letting Go of Unmet Expectations in Relationships11:54 Asking for Help as a Skill That Builds Resilience14:47 Restoring Emotional Roots to Heal BurnoutLinksDive deeper:Burnout isn’t a personal failure or a lack of resilience. It’s a signal that something in the system, expectations, roles, pace, or support, is out of alignment. Conversations like this one help surface the human experience of burnout, while the broader work continues to explore how organizations can respond more intelligently and sustainably.To explore burnout, leadership, and sustainable performance through a workplace and organizational lens, connect with Cait Donovan: https://bit.ly/bookcaitLearn more about Cait’s speaking work: https://www.caitdonovan.com/speakingShort on time? Watch this 3-minute overview: https://bit.ly/caitdreel2025Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

AD: What if you could step into a room filled with the people who hold the keys to the big stages, the book deals, and the most powerful platforms for your voice? The Gateway Gathering Pitch Fest is a visibility accelerator for thought-leaders. Whether you’re ready to pitch or just want to discover what’s possible join us January 13 – 15. Visit https://bit.ly/friedgatewayAD: The right support changes everything. Our Director of Coaching, Sarah Vosen, combines expertise and compassion to walk beside you: https://caitdonovan.com/coachingAre you burned out and lonely? That stops today! We know that burnout takes a different shape when the life you worked hard to build no longer feels like it belongs to you and you’re pushed to rebuild meaning from the inside out.Cait welcomes back author and coach Hailey Paige Magee, whose work has supported thousands of burned out and lonely folks who are recovering people-pleasers and high achievers as they redefine their relationship with success. Their conversation focuses on the moment burnout stops looking like exhaustion and starts revealing a deeper misalignment. Hailey speaks candidly about the quiet collapse that happens when your identity no longer fits the life around you and the grief that rises when you can no longer pretend everything is fine.The heart of the episode centers on stopping you feeling burned out and lonely by finding reconnection with community.How do you return to community after a long stretch of self-protection? How do you stay rooted in yourself without slipping into performance or old habits? And what becomes possible when belonging has nothing to do with achievement? Cait and Hailey explore these questions and offer a grounded reminder that meaning grows through honest relationships, not algorithms or accolades.#communitywellbeing, #burntoutandalone, #lonelienessEpisode Breakdown:00:00 Burnout, Misalignment, and Identity Collapse06:02 Social Media, Success, and Loss of Purpose12:02 Grief as a Turning Point in Burnout Recovery14:56 Rebuilding Connection and Community37:08 Evolving Identity and Rediscovering Meaning42:06 From Me to We in the Next Phase of RecoveryLinksPrevious episode with Hailey: https://redcircle.com/shows/e4c0db0a-98a4-47e6-a2b0-6a291469e1d6/ep/d8fec203-3b47-4c8a-9a30-edaf876d1316Cait Donovan is a keynote speaker, author, and host of FRIED: The Burnout Podcast, specializing in burnout, mis/match, and sustainable performance at work. She partners with corporate leaders, teams, and professional associations through keynotes, workshops, and leadership sessions that treat burnout as data, not failure, to help organizations reduce burnout without blame or shame and build healthier, high performing cultures.To bring Cait to your organization or event, book an inquiry call here: https://bit.ly/bookcaitLearn more about Cait’s speaking work: https://www.caitdonovan.com/speakingShort on time? Watch this 3-min video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZ7Ib-hllQAPodcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Many people mistake burnout for personal failure, but the real issue is the quiet mismatch between the energy you actually have and the expectations you keep pushing yourself to meet.Sarah Vosen gets to the core of why so many burned-out high achievers feel defeated: the math of your life stopped working long before you noticed it. When your energy drops but your expectations stay at their old setting, even simple days feel impossible. The conversation challenges listeners to ask what they believe they “should” be able to do and where those beliefs came from in the first place. How often are you measuring yourself against a past version of you? And what changes once you base your plans on your real capacity instead of the fantasy of unlimited output?This episode is an invitation to rebuild self-trust by telling the truth about what you can actually give right now. Burnout recovery begins when you stop assuming your worth hinges on productivity and start giving yourself permission to operate from reality. Sarah offers encouragement, clarity, and accessible next steps for anyone ready to release the shame of falling short and move toward days that feel doable again.Episode Breakdown:00:00 Understanding Burnout and Its Real Impact on High Achievers02:55 How to Adjust Expectations for Better Burnout Recovery05:45 Realistic Ways to Assess Your Energy, Time, and Capacity09:13 Why Consistent Self-Care Supports Burnout Healing11:54 How to Find the Right Support for Burnout RecoveryLinksYour team's energy and well-being are worth investing in. Hire Cait to speak at your company, association, or event: https://caitdonovan.com/speakingPodcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Fall can hit like a quiet emotional landslide as grief, guilt, and old heaviness rise to the surface and ask for release.Sarah Vosen talks about why this season often feels heavier than we expect and how that weight points to emotion that never fully moved through the system. She highlights the way sadness, guilt, and that familiar tightness in the chest show up when the pace naturally shifts and the body finally has room to speak. What if those uncomfortable waves are your body reaching for relief instead of signaling something you did wrong? And how would your days shift if you treated that heaviness as guidance instead of something to outrun?This episode offers a steady invitation back to release. Sarah focuses on the simple acts that help the body soften and recover its flow: tears that want to be felt, breaths that need more space, warmth when the cold settles in, hydration when everything feels dry, rest when your system begs for it, and the inner clarity that comes from paying attention to what you truly need. Fall isn’t a season for pushing harder; it’s a season for loosening your grip. Sarah gives listeners a grounded, compassionate framework for honoring that rhythm so they can move through this time with more ease and far less judgment.Episode Breakdown:00:02 Why Fall Triggers Grief, Guilt, and Emotional Burnout03:10 How Chinese Medicine Explains Fall Emotions06:55 How Unprocessed Emotions Create Seasonal Burnout10:22 Deep Breathing Techniques for Emotional Release in Fall13:41 Embracing Natural Cycles and Letting GoDive deeper:Burnout isn’t a personal failure or a lack of resilience. It’s a signal that something in the system, expectations, roles, pace, or support, is out of alignment. Conversations like this one help surface the human experience of burnout, while the broader work continues to explore how organizations can respond more intelligently and sustainably.To explore burnout, leadership, and sustainable performance through a workplace and organizational lens, connect with Cait Donovan: https://bit.ly/bookcaitLearn more about Cait’s speaking work: https://www.caitdonovan.com/speakingShort on time? Watch this 3-minute overview: https://bit.ly/caitdreel2025Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm