S6 E7 You Write The Rules w/Robin Davis

On this episode, I dined on pasta alla gricia with my guest Robin Davis while we spoke about the tricky balance of being in a relationship while cultivating and celebrating a solo life. Like me, Robin is an American in Paris. She's also a writer, producer, and a soon-to-be-published author!  I really enjoyed this episode because all of the prior guests I've spoken to this season were single and living alone, so it was interesting for me to get the perspective of someone who loves living alone but is in a happy and healthy romantic relationship.  During our conversation, I, surprisingly, found it hard to change my mindset about relationship milestones and expectations. While editing the episode I realized that I asked Robin different versions of the same question because it didn't fit the "proper steps" of a romantic relationship progression.  Robin so graciously reminded me that we write our own rules for our lives and the way we want to live it. As long as we live with integrity, are happy, and stay true to ourselves, we're on the right path regardless of what it looks like.   

Two episodes in one week! Look at meeeee! This is my way of apologizing for the long break between episodes. So all is forgiven now, yeah?  In this episode, I talk about how what started as a way to center myself (and, let’s be honest, keep me off the streets and out of the wine bars) turned into something way bigger. I didn’t realize it at the time, but every solo dinner I made was laying the foundation for the life I have now. Cooking for myself became more than just something to do to pass the time. It was how I learned to listen to what I truly needed, how I built self-trust, and how I started making decisions that aligned with the life I wanted, even when I didn’t fully know what that life looked like yet. To my surprise, asking “what do I want for dinner?” was really me asking “what do I want for myself? For this life?” And that’s when everything started to shift and evolve in ways I still kinda can’t believe it has.

In this episode, I had the absolute pleasure of chatting with Tanisha Townsend, the founder of Girl Meets Glass, a wine lifestyle and education agency, and woman whose honesty, humor, and intelligence I admire deeply. I made fried chicken and mashed potatoes, she brought a beautiful bottle of Blanc de Blancs, and we got to talking! Tanisha brought her wit and no-nonsense attitude to the conversation in a way that left reflecting for days on some of the gems she dropped like, like: “Are you actually ready for what you really want?” and “If someone watched your habits for a week, would they reflect the life you say you want?” We also explore how living alone has given Tanisha the space to envision, build, and expand her business. It’s not that she couldn’t have achieved everything she has otherwise, but having the freedom and space (mentally and emotionally) to pour fully into herself and her vision made all the difference. I’m always moved and inspired by women who stand tall in their truth, show up fully, own their choices, and walk boldly toward the life they deserve.

Je parle français dans cet épisode. Pas le meilleur français et pas sans fautes, mais au moins je l'ai fait, et pour cela, j'en suis contente. Bien sûr, le fait d'avoir cette conversation avec une amie m'a beaucoup aidé. Dans cet épisode, "Pour que je m'aime encore", j'ai parlé à mon amie Farah, parisienne qui y est née et y a grandi. Elle est l'une des personnes les plus rayonnantes, réfléchies et profondes que j'ai pu rencontrer ici à Paris. Elle a raconté comment vivre seule pour la première fois dans sa trentaine lui a permis de s'épanouir et de s'aimer. De la décoration de son propre appartement avec beaucoup de couleurs à son rituel du dîner, en passant par le fait de se permettre de ressentir les flux et reflux de la vie, sans honte. C'était une conversation édifiante, amusante et honnête que j'ai beaucoup appréciée et et j'espère que ce sera la même chose pour toi.

In this week’s episode of Dinner for One 2.0, I touch on the stigma surrounding solo living, especially for those of us in our 30s and beyond. There’s still this outdated narrative that if a woman lives alone, she must be lonely, jaded, or just waiting for the right partner to “complete” her. But we know that’s not true, right? Living alone doesn’t equal loneliness, and it definitely doesn’t mean your life is incomplete. In fact, living solo has made me so much more intentional with the people and experiences I invite into my life. I also talk about the Dinner for One Supper Club, which initially I thought would be a five dinner series and has turned into something much bigger. I created this monthly gathering as a space for single women living alone to connect, share meals, and celebrate the lives we’re building. It’s a reminder that living alone can actually inspire us to step out of our comfort zones and form deeper connections, the opposite of being lonely.   

My first guest of the season is my friend Jessica Hodge, an Australian sommelier living in Paris. This episode turned out to be quite an interesting one because I initially expected Jess to share similar feelings and ideas about creating and embracing a life of living alone, even if it’s temporary. Well, listener, I was wrong. That said, I thoroughly enjoyed our conversation, and perhaps most importantly, I walked away with a valuable reminder about assumptions and expectations. It's crucial not to assume that the people close to you share the exact same ideas or feelings about everything. That doesn’t mean your friendship is any less meaningful, it’s quite the opposite actually! It means you have an opportunity to listen more and ask thoughtful questions. And you know what happens when you do that? You’ll learn something new about that person and probably about yourself, which can, ultimately, help you evolve your own perspective as this conversation did with mine.

And I'm back!  To be honest, I thought the last episode published in June 2023 would be my last, but clearly I was wrong.  When I started this podcast in 2018, I was in my early 30s grappling questions: "How can I survive this colossal life shift?",  "What does survival even look like?" "Can I stay in Paris?" "Will I stay in Paris?" For all intents and purposes, I survived and did some cool shit. Some would even say I thrived. My podcast became pretty popular, I published my first book,  launched a monthly supper club, started doing pop-ups at different restaurants in Paris, interned in a restaurant kitchen, co-hosted a dinner in Milan, and even prepared my first private dinner. A lot has been going on.  Now as I approach a very significant age milestone, new questions have started to plague me:  "What does it mean to truly live?" and "How can I design a life that really resembles me?"   So this new version of Dinner for One, version 2.0, isn't revolving around a love story gone bad. Instead, it is about self-discovery and continuing to bloom where you're planted even when life’s path looks a bit blurry. 

It's been a long time since the last episode, but I’m back! From my Parisian kitchen to your ears, join me on a trip down memory lane with some of the best moments from the Dinner for One podcast.

Ten years ago today, June 12, 2013, I landed at Charles de Gaulle airport in Paris with a spousal visa in hand, a diamond ring on my left ring finger, and a husband waiting for me at the arrivals section. I thought I had it all.  Fast forward ten years, June 12, 2023, and my life looks very different. It doesn't resemble at all anything that I expected, but I am convinced everything that has happened led me to this moment. Maybe it was all meant to me?  Alongside the disappointment and tears, there were moments of immense joy, belly-splitting laughter, and taking on projects that led me to where I am today and I've learned some valuable lessons along the way.  In this episode, I discuss what I believe is my purpose in life and ten things I've learned over the last decade. Stick around because there are a few announcements towards the end.  I apologize in advance for the sound, I didn't realize it was so low and  while I can't really control the rain, I hope it doesn't ruin your listening experience. 

In this episode, I’m in conversation with another pal of mine, Rosie Clifton. The goal of this episode was to talk about French parenting styles vs British, or even more broadly, Anglo-Saxon parenting styles. And while we did touch on that, the two biggest and most important lessons I took away from this chat were that I really need to CHILL THE F OUT and appreciate just living in France. As you’ve probably figured out, overthinking is my superpower. I had many questions about being a parent in France, raising French kids, and preconceived notions about how hard it must be. Rosie’s approach was just kinda like listen, you’re here, you’re you, you have to be confident with what you’re transmitting and who you are and tout va bien (everything is gonna be okay), which is so true and can be applied to many aspects of life. Especially living in France. After you’ve been living in France for a while It’s easy to make sly comments about French people and the country but the fact of the matter is that it’s not a terrible place to live, despite how it may seem due to the recent strikes, and there are a lot of benefits that come with living in a country with a strong social welfare system and a history of fighting for it. The main benefit is that you can enjoy life and spend quality time with your friends, family, and half-French children if you have any. Thank you Rosie for helping me view France in a different light and easing my anxiety around my non-existent children. That said, if I ever have any and they start getting sassy with me in French I’m sending them your way. And thanks for putting up with me in the group chat too.