38 - The Expendables 3

It's finally here, the first annual Arnold Schwarzenegger Battle Royale! Marvel as all 44 previous Arnold Schwarzenegger characters are sorted into categories and forced to fight to the death in a tournament scenario. Can Mr. Freeze overcome Handsome Stranger? Will the T-800 Terminator defeat the T-850 one? And who exactly is Bar Patron? Joined by Ry, creator of the Arnold Schwarzenegger Presents and Sven Watch themes, Rob and Jemry oversee the grand Arnold Schwarzenegger Battle Royale, and come to a surprising result.

Our podcast's coverage of Arnold Schwarzenegger films almost comes to an end in the penultimate episode of season 1. Joined by Nick Mason, we cover Arnold's latest* theatrical release, Terminator: Dark Fate, and review what we have learned so far, which admittedly isn't much. Recorded in late 2019 in a lead up to the Arnold Schwarzenegger Battle Royale, this episode features book smarts, stunt doubles and murder victims, along with an aging robot that's learned how to feel. *I'm not entirely sure when Journey to China: The Mystery of Iron Mask releases.

Joined by Avery Hutley, the podcast watches the Scoot McNairy film Aftermath and then, in the Aftermath of that traumatic event, discusses cinema sound calibration, air traffic control protocol, and the merits of military training from a long, long time ago. Oh, and the film itself.

Randy Adeva returns to the podcast for a record third time to discuss the extended SNL sketch that is Taran Killam's Killing Gunther. As with most other episodes of the podcast, Arnold Schwarzenegger makes an appearance in the film we're discussing, and is arguably the best part. Our fight to the death this week finally enters the MCU™, as The Hulk™ takes on a brain surgeon, an ice skater and a dancing clown who may or may not be named Chubbs™.

Joined by Katherine Allan of Well, Actually, the podcast reviews Maggie, the dramatic turn by Arnold Schwarzenegger that mostly features him standing around and brooding.

Erin Michelle joins the podcast this week for Terminator Genisys, a film that doesn't ever give an explanation its portmanteau title, or any of its plot, really. Jai Courtney, Emilia Clarke and Jason Clarke all hide their natural accents and join Arnold Schwarzenegger to portray less iconic versions of characters you've seen in better terminator films. You can check out both Erin and Jemry in Pretty Good Lineup, 6th – 19th of April at the 2020 Melbourne International Comedy Festival, details available here.

Matthew Vasquez joins the podcast this week for David Ayer's Sabotage, an Arnold Schwarzenegger film featuring a surprising lack of sabotage. Maybe they should have gone with a more descriptive title, like Subterfuge, or Underwhelming. In other parts of the podcast, a father, a president and a music teacher walk into a sewer. No, it's not a joke, it's an introduction to our recurring fight to the death segment.

Joined by Jordan Barr, the podcast takes another journey with a team called The Expendables that consider themselves anything but. Can the presence of Wesley Snipes and Kelsey Grammar take this movie to heights hitherto unreached by the previous films? The short answer is no.

Joined by Maddy Weeks, the podcast goes down to the bottom floor of a top secret boat jail in search of someone named Mannheim, but only finds the subject of our very special podcast, Arnold Schwarzenegger. We also watch and discuss Escape Plan, for those playing at home. Elsewhere, in fight to the death news, snowmen fight dragons, demons fight superheroes, and someone bravely sacrifices themselves for no real reason. It's all happening on this boat, folks!

Joined by Angus Gordon, this Arnold Schwarzenegger podcast watches The Last Stand, in which FBI agent Forest Whitaker chases an international drug lord in a race to the Mexican border. If you're confused as to how this premise relates to an Arnold Schwarzenegger/Johnny Knoxville small town action-comedy, join the damn club.