Zach and Mike # 5

REUNITED AND IT FEEEELS SO GOOOOD............THE BOYZ ARE BACK!!! RIGHT?!......RIGHT?!!!!!!.....Fuck all y'all. We were in a good mood and now you guys ruined it. Anyway, we're back after a hiatus and we missed each other and you guys. How have you been? Let's talk about you.......We'll never leave you again (until we're both too busy to do this podcast...........again)See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this one your favorite two wormy, gross, cannibalistic, humanoid, underground, dweller dipshits ,"hit the vault" (is that a thing?.....sure) and dug deep to find a hidden classic! It was from last year and the references are outdated (but references from a day ago are outdated nowadays, ammirite?)We also called it "Back On My Bullshit", way back then but you'll get over it. We had to. Basically, its the same brand of horse jibber nonsense you've come to know and love but just called something else. It was either this or nothing........so stop complaining........I swear I'll take you back to your mothers if you're gonna keep acting like that!!We hope you enjoy. We're also sorry that we haven't been as consistent lately. We've been busy doing shit but we love this dumb thing and all of you so we'll be back at it soon.Toodles. Smooches. More shit like thatP.S. we record this thing at a studio space and you can hear another band playing super shitty and LOUD the whole goddamn time. So, there's that.....See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Michael Conrad and Noah Bailey talk with Mike about their new comic Double Walker, the Misfits, DIY, Twilight Zone and lots of discussion about trying to be an artist in the 23rd centurySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week we're back with a guest and its Ben Roy. Ben defines the term, "multi-hyphenate". He's a stand-up comedian, actor, musician, podcaster and all around great human. Check out Bens band Spells, his podcasts, 97.9 THE RAT RACE or The Grawlix Saves the World, his tv show, "Those Who Can't", now streaming on HBOMAX or his new standup record, "Take The Sandwich", available wherever you stream shit.Ben basically stops by to rub all of that in Zach and Mikes dumb faces and make them feel stupid for being lazy sacks of shit. Its fuckin' radSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

onthisepisodeyourdipshithostsarelateandcouldntgettheirshittogethertointerviewaguestontimesotheyfuckeditallupandthenjustwentwithtalkingtoeachotherbeacusetheycantevendoafuckingpodcastright.Real fuckin' hard to do a goddamn podcast, huh?So, this one is late. And its just us....again. Shit happened. The week got busy. Blah, fuckin' blah. No good excuseWe're sorry.We don't deserve youPlease keep listening.-Zach and Mike (the pork and bean boyz)See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today it's just Zach and Mike so.......(ahem)I see the crystal raindrops fallAnd the beauty of it allIs when the sun comes shining throughTo make those rainbows in my mindWhen I think of you sometimeAnd I wanna spend some time with youJust the two of usWe can make it if we tryJust the two of us(Just the two of us)Just the two of usBuilding castles in the skyJust the two of usYou and IWe look for love, no time for tearsWasted water's all that isAnd it don't make no flowers growGood things might come to those who waitNot for those who wait too lateWe gotta go for all we knowJust the two of usWe can make it if we tryJust the two of us(Just the two of us)Just the two of usBuilding them castles in the skyJust the two of usYou and II hear the crystal raindrops fallOn the window down the hallAnd it becomes the morning dewAnd darling when the morning comesAnd I see the morning sunI wanna be the one with youJust the two of usWe can make it if we tryJust the two of us(Just the two of us)Just the two of usBuilding big castles way on highJust the two of usYou and IJust the two of us(We can make it, just the two of us)Let's get it together baby (yeah)(Just the two of us)Just the two of us(We can make it, just the two of us)(Just the two of us)(We can make it, just the two of us)(Just the two of us)(We can make it, just the two of us)(Just the two of us)(We can make it, just the two of us)(Just the two of us)(We can make it, just the two of us)(Just the two of us)......you're welcomeSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week the Bizarro World Bacon Brothers get a chance to talk to Ryan Cownie. Ryan is an amazing standup comedian thats hailed from Los Angeles, Austin and Nebraska. They discuss massage chairs, long walks, flashbacks in movies, hanging out with your dad, being vegan, Leonardo DiCaprio and much, much more.Check out Ryans standup special, "I Cant Die" (Mike and Zach did the music) on Standup Records.Hey, can I borrow some money? I'm talking to you. Yes, you. I have this new dumb job and they're holding my check for a week, so fucking stupid. I'll get you back. I'm good for it. Or, I guess you can be a dick about it. Whatever. This is bullshitSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today, our guest is the Grammy award winning producer, Stuart Sikes. Stuart has worked with such artists as Rocket From the Crypt, Catpower, John Spencer Blues Explosion, Jack White, Loretta Lynn, The White Stripes, A Giant Dog, The Riverboat Gamblers, Drakulas and much much more.We talk about Jesse "The Body" Ventura, Gallagher, mud bugs, old movie theaters, Lee Harvey Oswald, our disdain for sports (Mike says "golf stick"), how Zach and Mike are fancy boys and Zach comes up with a new catchphrase thats sure to sweep the nation. Stuart is surely slumming it on this one and lowering his standards by talking to your favorite deep fried, beer cheese and chili guys.Do you have a Grammy? I didn't think so.............bitchSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We here at the Z&MM3 (we're too cool to spell it all out) haven't ran into too many other people that do what we do (bullshit artists) that we haven't yet met. But, as Ed MacMahon famously said, "I'm not paying that much for no stepped on shit, man! Come on, Jack!! I NEEEED IT!!! GIVE IT UP OR I'M GONNA FUCKIN' CUT YOU!!!!".........no, thats not it.......... it was, "strangers are just friends you haven't met yet", I don't know, some jackass crap like that.Anyway, this week we didn't know our guest, Nick Wheeler of The All American Rejects. Nick is a prolific writer and producer as well as guitarist in a huge band and we talk about being busy during COVID, Lego and the proper way to say LEGO (not LegoS, dipshit), television shows and Zach and Mike both contemplate each others deaths, but, like, in a fun way. Mike also manages to not embarrass Zach too much in front of their new friend (you can't take that guy anywhere).Its basically musicians talking about musician shit (the exact way we while away our lives in backstage rooms) so listen in and contemplate your place in this world........too much? I'm sorry. I've been listening to "This Mortal Coil", lately. I also haven't been wearing my crystal.I'm watching that "Moneyball" movie right now. It's pretty good. Seen it? I fuckin' hate sportsSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today we get a rare chance to sit down with Zach's bandmate, Tim Mcilrath , from Rise Against, in the second part of our, "Rise Against Roundup", YEEE-HAW!!!!.........no? Its my intro and I'll do want I want.........FUCK YOU!!! (runs away flailing arms)Tim and Zach have traveled the planet together for a long time now and have done a whole lot of cool shit with one another. They're also family and they both love to chat and shoot shit when they get together. Add Mike to that party shit gets RRRRRREEEEEEEAAAAAALLLLLLLLL..............actually, its just three musicians that have spent most of their lives on the road having a normal conversation but, I (clap)! AM (clap)! HERE (clap)! FOR (clap)! IT (clap)! HONEEEYYYYY!!!!!They talk about the new Rise Against album coming out June 4th, college, dogs and Tim somehow gets the two tater-tots with cheese boyz to talk about sports (no small feat).In all seriousness, Tim is an amazing person (as you'll hear) and musician. His genuine nature and overall dignified wisdom really contrasts with your hosts and just basically shows what hokey-pokey, okey-smokey, bucktoothed farthole, two-bit, sheep shit, boring, lazy, Patrick Swayze, mudhole stompin', Styx, chicken fried, cut-offs, flip-flops, mullet havin', knife weildin', small town gossipin', pimple poppin', gum smackin', lake draggin'. knife fight havin', threes company watchin', stupid name havin', premature baldin', cross eyed, jacuzzi water drinkin', weekend warrior, crooked lawyer, fedora wearin', over sharin', motor mouth, from the south, Don Knotts, Big Lots, jean shorts, pillow forts, Voldemort, Godsmack, Nickleback, give the dog a bone, dollar store, food stamp, leave that thing alone, cussin', fussin', diaper wearin', colicky, shitty, itty-bitty-titty-committee, cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed, stupid, worthless, goddamn, freeloading sons of bitches, big mouth, know-it-all, asshole, jerk, (you forgot) ugly, lazy, disrespectful, "no dad, what about you!?", type of dipfucks that they are.Hope you like it.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.