I'm WLW, But I'd Never Date A Woman

What is it actually like the first time you’re with a woman?In this episode, Alix & Kayla talk about first times with girls — the magical ones, the awkward ones, the confusing ones, and the ones that quietly change everything. Drawing from listener stories, polls, and their own experiences, they explore what it means when desire finally makes sense, why some first times feel life-changing and others feel messy, and how fear, alcohol, shame, curiosity, and timing all shape our queer awakenings.From being a “ ‘straight’ girl” at a gay bar to sober sex, baby gay panic, internalized homophobia, and the relief of realizing you’re not broken — just queer and nervous — this conversation is honest, funny, and deeply relatable.Whether your first time was magical, chaotic, or still hasn’t happened yet, this episode is for anyone navigating queerness, curiosity, and the moments that quietly rewrite your story.01:45 – Today’s Topic: First Time With a Girl03:00 – Listener Poll Results: Magical vs Awkward First Times05:30 – How Old Were You the First Time?06:45 – Did You Come Out After?08:00 – Game Time: First-Time Confessions10:40 – Identity Crisis vs Peace After the First Time12:00 – Listener Story: First Time With a Woman After Only Dating Men14:45 – Feeling Like a Teenager Again16:45 – Why Exploring Identity Matters (Even If It Changes)18:00 – Is the First Time Scarier Without “Knowing What to Do”?20:20 – Listener Story: A Bad First Time That Still Meant Something23:20 – What Counts as “Lesbian Sex,” Anyway?26:00 – Intentional vs Party Hookups29:00 – When It Finally “Clicks”31:00 – Listener Story: Calm, Clarity, and First-Time Love33:00 – Dating Men vs Dating Women: The Intimacy Wall36:45 – Wishing You’d Figured It Out Sooner38:00 – Listener Story: Awkward, Nervous, Perfectly Imperfect40:15 – Why the Build-Up Is Often the Hardest Part42:30 – Hooking Up With Someone Who’s Never Been With a Girl45:00 – Sober Sex, Alcohol, and Lowered Inhibitions47:45 – “Who’s the Problem?” Baby Gay Panic Edition52:00 – Internalized Homophobia vs Externalized Heterophobia54:00 – Closing Thoughts: You’re Not Broken, You’re Queer🔔 Subscribe on YouTube for more episodes🎧 Listen on SpotifyFollow WNS on InstagramFollow WNS on TikTokFollow KaylaFollow AlixVisit our retreat center in Nicaragua!Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

What does body image look like when you’re queer, partnered, confident… and still unlearning everything you were taught?In this episode, Alix & Kayla get deeply honest about body image, desire, and self-perception inside queer relationships. They talk about comparing yourself to your past body, feeling pressure to look “gay enough,” navigating femme and masc expectations, and how confidence, strength, and self-expression shape attraction far more than size or shape.From almond moms and Gen Z style anxiety to masculinity, femininity, fitness, sex, and learning how to dress—and live—for yourself, this conversation explores what it really means to feel at home in your body when the rules you grew up with no longer apply.This is a candid, funny, and thoughtful episode about queer identity, lesbian relationships, body neutrality, confidence, and the slow, imperfect work of decentering the gaze and choosing yourself.00:00 – Intro: Married, Codependent, and Back in the Jungle01:00 – Queer Camp Update + Life in Nicaragua05:30 – Today’s Topic: Body Image in Queer Relationships06:40 – “My Body Had to Be ___ to Deserve Affection”09:00 – Comparing Your Body to Your Past Self11:00 – Unlearning Food, Rest, and Exercise Guilt13:35 – Body Image in the Queer World vs the Straight World17:00 – Confidence, Self-Expression, and Attraction19:00 – Dating Women: Feeling Bigger, Stronger, or More Visible24:30 – When Body Image Wasn’t the Problem at All26:00 – Weight Gain, Health, and Changing Body Shapes28:00 – Masculinity, Femininity, and Wanting a Different Body31:00 – Being Femme, Being “Hot,” and Decentering Men34:00 – Getting Dressed for Yourself (Not the Gaze)37:15 – Listener Hot Takes on Body Image39:30 – Masc vs Femme Bodies & Internalized Misogyny42:00 – Aesthetic Attraction vs Romantic Attraction44:00 – Power, Confidence, and “The Hotter Partner”46:20 – Are Queer People Expected to Be More Body-Evolved?49:45 – Gender Identity vs Learned Body Shame52:40 – Who’s the Problem: Men, Women, or the Patriarchy?58:30 – The One Thing We All Fixate On01:00:00 – Why We Do This to Ourselves🔔 Subscribe on YouTube for more episodes🎧 Listen on SpotifyFollow WNS on InstagramFollow WNS on TikTokFollow Kayla Follow AlixVisit our retreat center in Nicaragua!Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

In this episode, Alix & Kayla unpack one of the most controversial queer takes on the internet: being attracted to women, sleeping with women, but not wanting to date or marry them. Is it preference, internalized homophobia, avoidance, or just honest self-awareness?Through listener submissions, they dive into WLW stereotypes, deal breakers, attachment styles, emotional intensity, codependency, and why queer relationships can feel so confronting. This episode is funny, nuanced, validating, and guaranteed to spark debate.00:00 – Intro: married, not related, very codependent02:00 – Listener love, sister wives & queer community updates06:00 – Deal breakers: kids, lying, cheating & location10:00 – Hygiene, finances & political differences16:05 – Topic intro: “I’m into women but wouldn’t date one”17:10 – WLW stereotypes: neediness, codependency & you-hauling21:00 – Hookups vs dating & honesty vs leading people on25:20 – Intimacy, fear & emotional closeness with women29:50 – “Women are what I desire, men are what I tolerate”35:30 – Right person vs wrong person39:00 – Independence, merging lives & feeling suffocated44:00 – Avoidant attachment & relationship panic49:30 – Who’s the Problem: toothbrush edition 56:30 – Final thoughts & listener call-to-action#WLWPodcast #QueerPodcast #LesbianPodcast #BiVisibility #WLWRelationships #QueerDating #AttachmentTheory #QueerDiscourse #WivesNotSisters #LGBTQPodcastConnect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

What happens when you come out online—and thousands of people decide they’re done with you?In this episode, Alix & Kayla unpack cancel culture, internet outrage, and the emotional, financial, and personal fallout of coming out publicly. From losing 50,000 followers to navigating homophobia disguised as “wellness,” they explore why the internet struggles with nuance, change, and coexistence—and why scrolling past the beans might save us all.This is a raw, thoughtful conversation about queerness, yoga culture, social media power, cancel culture, and learning how to live outside the echo chamber.00:00 – Intro: married, queer, and back online02:10 – Cancelable or not? Internet apology culture05:15 – Cancel culture vs real accountability07:45 – Allegations, platforms & public judgment12:50 – Cancel culture fatigue & social currency14:30 – Coming out online & losing 50,000 followers18:40 – COVID, internet culture & rising hostility22:45 – “Colonizer,” “predator,” and wellness backlash25:05 – Is social media a workplace? Queerness at work32:20 – Why follower loss still matters38:30 – Yoga, religion & spiritualized homophobia43:00 – Inclusivity with an asterisk47:00 – The Bean Soup Theory & online outrage52:15 – Echo chambers, empathy & coexistence01:04:00 – Who’s the problem? Public figures & politics#QueerPodcast #CancelCulture #LGBTQPodcast #InternetCulture #ComingOutOnline #WellnessIndustry #QueerVoices #YogaCulture #SocialMediaTalk #WivesNotSistersConnect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

In this episode, married queers Alix & Kayla debate one of the most polarizing topics in LGBTQ+ culture—from gay bars and lesbian parties to allies, baby gays, and the future of community spaces. It’s thoughtful, funny, deeply personal… and ends with the messiest Who’s the Problem yet (yes, it involves towels).This conversation explores queer history, safety, allyship, feminism, chosen family, and why context matters more than hard rules.00:00 – Intro: married, queer & back for the new year02:10 – “Everyone’s a little bi?” identity & labels04:30 – The real question: straight people in queer spaces07:45 – Coming out in 2009 & first gay bar experiences12:05 – Why queer spaces feel intimidating (and necessary)15:10 – Straight friends, allies & knowing the culture18:45 – Lesbian spaces vs gay male spaces22:10 – When inclusion goes too far (and when it doesn’t)25:45 – Queer Camp: who it’s for and why it changed everything31:30 – Bars vs retreats: sex, safety & intention36:30 – Can you even “police” queerness?41:45 – WHO’S THE PROBLEM: The Towel Incident 🫠49:50 – Final thoughts & listener call-in#QueerPodcast #LGBTQPodcast #QueerSpaces #Allyship #LesbianPodcast #StraightInGaySpaces #QueerCommunity #ChosenFamily #Feminism #WivesNotSisters #WhoIsTheProblemConnect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

Why does it feel like every WLW couple is breaking up right now?In this episode, Alix and Kayla unpack the recent wave of WLW breakups—from emotional burnout and attachment styles to visibility pressure, queer dating dynamics, and why sapphic relationships can feel so intense. They discuss common breakup patterns, listener perspectives, and how queer relationships navigate communication, community overlap, and healing after a split.00:00 – Intro & why WLW breakups feel different03:10 – Emotional enmeshment in queer relationships07:40 – Why “let’s stay friends” often backfires12:50 – Identity loss after a WLW breakup18:30 – Attachment styles & emotional mirroring24:40 – Boundaries, no-contact & healing30:20 – Grief, longing & nervous system repair35:10 – What actually helps you move on40:00 – Closing reflections#WLW #QueerPodcast #LesbianBreakups #Sapphic #QueerRelationships #WLWDating #QueerCulture #LesbianPodcastConnect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

Is it cheating… or just crossing a line?Alix and Kayla kick off the new year from Nicaragua by playing "Cheating or No?" —breaking down gray-area relationship scenarios like shared playlists, DMs, flirting, emotional affairs, and “we weren’t official” loopholes. They read listener-submitted cheating stories that include coworker crushes, wedding-night confessions, secret double lives, and queer awakenings sparked by one kiss. Honest, funny, and unfiltered conversations about boundaries, emotional intimacy, and why cheating isn’t always about sex.00:00 Intro from Nicaragua + lost episode recap02:50 Game: Cheating or No? (playlists, DMs, flirting, nudes)07:09 Listener cheating stories begin08:00 Emotional affair with a coworker13:45 Best friend confesses love before the wedding22:18 “It wasn’t cheating because it was a girl”28:20 Secret double life & poly vs monogamy35:10 “We weren’t official” situationship disaster40:20 Who’s the problem? Personal cheating story46:00 Is staying with a cheater worse than cheating?#CheatingOrNo #QueerPodcast #WLW #LesbianPodcast #RelationshipAdvice #EmotionalCheating #Situationships #QueerStories #DatingBoundariesConnect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

Are homoerotic friendships a canon queer experience? 🌈Recording from their new studio in Nicaragua, Alix and Kayla dive into homoerotic WLW friendships—the kind that blur the line between “best friend” and “something more.” From red/green flag dating games to listener submissions about twin-bed cuddling, forehead kisses, shared Google Docs, and lifelong “what ifs,” this episode unpacks queer longing, closeted intimacy, and the friendships that change us forever. Plus: a late-addition deep dive into Wicked as the ultimate WLW-coded friendship.00:00 Intro from Nicaragua + new studio setup01:20 Listener submissions & why this episode exists02:40 Red Flag / Green Flag / Beige Flag (WLW edition)06:10 Common outcomes of homoerotic friendships08:45 Listener Story #1: “The book I never got to finish”15:30 Personal college story & grief, queerness, and longing19:40 More submissions: roommates, Google Docs, future fantasies28:55 Shooting your shot vs. staying silent38:30 High school crushes & delayed coming out46:20 Who’s the problem? (Spoiler: society)49:10 Wicked, Glinda & Elphaba, and WLW-coded friendships#QueerPodcast #WLW #HomoeroticFriendships #LesbianPodcast #QueerStories #Situationships #ComingOut #QueerCulture #WickedMovie #SapphicConnect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

Family, queerness, religion, and the holidays—this episode goes deep. Alix and Kayla open up about navigating strained family relationships, missed weddings, religious rejection, reconciliation, and what it really takes to protect your peace as a queer couple during the holidays.From engagement fallout and parents not showing up, to rebuilding trust, setting boundaries, and creating chosen family traditions in Nicaragua—this is an honest, emotional, and deeply relatable conversation for anyone who’s ever felt unseen by their family.00:00 – Intro: married, not related, definitely codependent02:30 – Highs, lows & weirds of the week05:20 – Dreaming up a queer camp & chosen family07:00 – Family estrangement, phone anxiety & emotional triggers11:15 – Holidays, big families & complicated dynamics13:30 – Engagement fallout & family refusing to attend the wedding18:30 – Feeling invisible as a queer couple23:00 – Acceptance vs. avoidance in family systems29:00 – Therapy, boundaries & rebuilding relationships32:45 – Healing moments, unexpected growth & hope38:30 – Redefining holidays & creating new traditions43:00 – Religion, queerness & family rupture51:00 – Confrontation, truth, grief & clarity01:02:30 – Choosing peace, boundaries & moving forward#QueerPodcast #LGBTQPodcast #ChosenFamily #QueerMarriage #HolidayBoundaries #ReligiousTrauma #FamilyEstrangement #LesbianPodcast #HealingJourneys #QueerStories #WivesNotSistersConnect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

In this juicy, long-form episode, Alix and Kayla go deep into Caitlyn Jenner’s childhood, gender dysphoria, Olympic fame, marriages, parenting issues, transition timeline, political contradictions, and why the public remains so divided. Honest, funny, compassionate, and unfiltered.00:00 – Intro, reviews & coming-out stories01:20 – Why listeners say the show helped them come out04:40 – Caitlyn Jenner: pronouns & how she refers to her past06:30 – Childhood, dyslexia & early gender dysphoria08:20 – Athletics, college injury & the decathlon path11:50 – Olympic fame & America’s “golden couple” narrative13:10 – Marriages, kids & early controversies18:25 – Gender dysphoria during marriage & first transition attempt22:30 – Meeting Kris Jenner & the rise of the Kardashian empire34:20 – Parenting patterns & strained family relationships48:00 – Transition timeline, Diane Sawyer interview & media frenzy56:40 – Missteps, public criticism & political contradictions01:02:50 – Why the queer community is divided on Caitlyn Jenner#Podcast #LGBTQPodcast #QueerStories #CaitlynJenner #TransHistory #PopCultureDeepDive #Kardashians #LGBTQCommunity #QueerMarriage #IdentityJourneyConnect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!