Integrated Loser

In this episode, I sit down with Phillip Cohen for a deep and dynamic conversation about patriarchy, therapy, and internalized narratives. We explore how patriarchal conditioning shapes both men and women—often in ways we don’t consciously recognize.* Are women aware of the internalized stories influencing their lives?* How does patriarchy present in therapy?* Is it possible to step outside of the given cultural narratives and truly know what we want?Phillip, a self-professed patriarch, shares his perspective—including the ways he’s worked to dismantle his own conditioning. We challenge each other, push back on assumptions, and examine how these ingrained beliefs shape relationships, personal identity, and even therapy itself.It’s a conversation filled with honest reflection, intellectual friction, and a few laughs along the way. Whether you see patriarchy as an oppressive force, an old stubborn consciousness, or just the default narrative we’ve inherited, this episode invites you to question, challenge, and rethink the stories that shape us.🎧 Listen now and join the conversation in the comments! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherrylannaduncan.substack.com

Ladies, we need to talk.What if the way we've been conditioned to experience love is all wrong? What if the intoxicating highs and devastating lows that so many of us chase in relationships are not love, but something else entirely? What if true erotic energy isn’t something that comes from a man, but from within ourselves?This week on the podcast, I sat down with the brilliant Phillip Cohen to unpack a concept that has been stirring up deep conversations across my social media and personal reflections: Love love, not the man, for you will forever be in his power.It's a line from Dangerous Beauty, a film about the political and personal power of courtesans in Renaissance Venice. But more than a historical reference, it’s a wake-up call to modern women. How often do we hand over our own power in relationships, mistaking the rush of emotions as proof of love? How often do we fall into the narrative that tells us we need a man to "wake us up"—just like the fairy tales taught us?Phillip and I dive deep into the roots of these beliefs, exploring everything from the fairy tale scripts we’ve all internalised (Sleeping Beauty, anyone?) to the ways patriarchal conditioning has shaped not just women’s expectations, but men’s roles in relationships, too.We discuss:* The difference between erotic energy and romantic love* Why women have historically married their sense of desire to a man, instead of cultivating it independently* The paradox of modern feminism and its impact on relationships* How both men and women are trapped in outdated relationship dynamics—and how to break free* Practical steps to reclaim your own erotic, creative energy without making your partner the centre of your universeIf you’ve ever found yourself losing parts of who you are in a relationship, if you’ve felt the intoxicating pull of passion only to watch it fade into resentment and obligation, or if you’ve wondered why love stories always seem to follow the same frustrating patterns, this conversation is for you.This is not about abandoning love. It’s about understanding it differently. It's about loving love itself—as an experience, an energy, a force within you—rather than placing your power in the hands of another person.Intrigued? Listen to the full episode here and let’s continue this conversation.Drop a comment below—what does this phrase mean to you? Love love, not the man. How does it land? What parts of your own story does it stir up?With love Cherryl This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherrylannaduncan.substack.com

In this episode of 'That Conscious Bitch: The Podcast,' I and psychologist Phillip Cohen dive deep into the transformative power of owning your darkness. Explore why integrating your shadow self can make you more interesting, whole, and trustworthy. We'll uncover the irony of why those who embrace their flaws are often the ones we feel safest around.We'll also tackle the allure of seeking validation and excitement outside of relationships, diving into love addiction and the chase for that initial high. Learn how avoiding pain might make you miss out on true love, and why affairs often become misguided escapes.Finally, discover what draws you to certain people and how recognizing and integrating these qualities within yourself can transform your life, relationships, and work. Join us for a profound exploration of the psychology of love, fear, and authenticity. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherrylannaduncan.substack.com

Contact Phillip via email for a session [email protected] This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherrylannaduncan.substack.com

If you're a creative looking to unblock limiting beliefs around your work, contact Ophelie here https://www.opheliecabanero.com/ This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherrylannaduncan.substack.com

Join my guest Johannes Hoyos, Founder of Campfire Company and host of Transformational Gatherings and I, as we talk about what it means to be vulnerable, as a man, as a woman, as a human and all the ways we agree and don't agree on this topic.If you're interested in hosting your own transformational gatherings for your company, you can contact Johannes through his website herehttps://www.campfire-company.com/stories#transformationalgatherings #personalgrowth #psychology #funpodcasts This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherrylannaduncan.substack.com

"Stressed Out? Talk “to someone! - This week on "That Conscious Bitch", host Cherryl Duncan sits down with the one Dr Philip Janda, psychoanalyst and co- founder of Fitfirm. Together, they unravel the mystery of why everyone seems to be walking around with a constant sense of stress and anxiety. From the relationship between emotions and stress to the behaviour behind it all. So, whether you're a stressed-out ball of emotions or you know someone else who is, tune in to this episode of "That Conscious Bitch" and get ready to learn why you're a hot mess - and what you can do about it!You can learn more about what Philip does here https://fitfirm.de/de/ This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherrylannaduncan.substack.com

Cherryl speaks to Ithar Adel; Pop DJ, Philosopher and Author about living life with a little more joy, despite how dire things are in the world. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit cherrylannaduncan.substack.com