I Thought This Would Make Me Confident… It Didn't

Do certain situations still trigger fear, shame, or panic even when you know you should be fine? You are not broken. Old trauma can keep social anxiety active for years. In this episode I talk with Rehana Webster, EFT founding master and creator of the Trauma Buster Technique, about childhood trauma, severe trauma, and how one core incident can keep anxiety patterns going. We explore how tapping can help reduce the body's stress response, why getting to the root trauma matters, and what can change when the real issue is finally addressed. What you'll discover: 🔹 Why unresolved trauma keeps getting triggered in social situations 🔹 How to find the core incident behind a fear pattern 🔹 How tapping can reduce the emotional intensity 🔹 Why working around the problem can keep you stuck 🔹 What becomes possible when the root issue is resolved 💡 Quote from Rehana: "The only pain you experience is thinking about what the trauma is."   Start here: Free 7 Secrets to Social Confidence https://bit.ly/socialconfidencepodcast This short mini-course explains: • why social anxiety happens • why forcing exposure often backfires • how the fight-flight-freeze response creates anxiety symptoms • how tapping can help release the emotions and beliefs that trigger anxiety It's designed to help you understand what's actually driving social anxiety and give you a first experience with the tapping approach. -------------------------------------------------- About Seb Seb struggled with severe social anxiety himself for many years. Since 2009 he has helped people work through social anxiety using a calm, structured approach that combines psychology with EFT tapping. No forced exposure. No pressure to perform. No "just push yourself" advice. -------------------------------------------------- Scientific research on EFT tapping https://eftuniverse.com/research-studies/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36438382/ https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1195286/full

Do you feel confident in some situations… but suddenly freeze in others? Like you're fine one-on-one, but put you in a group, around someone you like or in a specific setting… and everything changes? In this episode, I'll show you why that happens, and what's really going on beneath it. It's not random. And it's not because something is wrong with you. You'll learn how certain situations activate old emotional patterns, and how to start working through them in a way that actually feels manageable.   Start here: Free 7 Secrets to Social Confidencehttps://bit.ly/socialconfidencenow This short mini-course explains:• why social anxiety happens • why forcing exposure often backfires • how the fight-flight-freeze response creates anxiety symptoms • how tapping can help release the emotions and beliefs that trigger anxiety It's designed to help you understand what's actually driving social anxiety and give you a first experience with the tapping approach. -------------------------------------------------- If you'd like practical tools you can start using right away: Fast Social Anxiety Reliefhttps://www.social-anxiety-solutions.com/fast-social-anxiety-relief/ -------------------------------------------------- About Seb Seb struggled with severe social anxiety himself for many years. Since 2009 he has helped people work through social anxiety using a calm, structured approach that combines psychology with EFT tapping. No forced exposure.No pressure to perform. No "just push yourself" advice. -------------------------------------------------- Scientific research on EFT tapping https://eftuniverse.com/research-studies/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36438382/  https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1195286/full

Do you still feel insecure, awkward, or self-conscious in social situations, even though you're no longer that teenager? In this episode, Sebastiaan explains how social anxiety can be tied to identities formed during puberty, like feeling like the outsider, the weak one, or the one who doesn't fit in. Start here: Free 7 Secrets to Social Confidencehttps://bit.ly/socialconfidencenow This short mini-course explains:• why social anxiety happens • why forcing exposure often backfires • how the fight-flight-freeze response creates anxiety symptoms • how tapping can help release the emotions and beliefs that trigger anxiety It's designed to help you understand what's actually driving social anxiety and give you a first experience with the tapping approach. -------------------------------------------------- If you'd like practical tools you can start using right away: Fast Social Anxiety Reliefhttps://www.social-anxiety-solutions.com/fast-social-anxiety-relief/ -------------------------------------------------- About Seb Seb struggled with severe social anxiety himself for many years. Since 2009 he has helped people work through social anxiety using a calm, structured approach that combines psychology with EFT tapping. No forced exposure.No pressure to perform. No "just push yourself" advice. -------------------------------------------------- Scientific research on EFT tapping https://eftuniverse.com/research-studies/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36438382/  https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1195286/full

In this episode, you'll hear a Club member, Tapani, describe: • Panic attacks fading • Baseline anxiety dropping from a nine to a three • Triggers losing their grip • Overthinking decreasing • Feeling more like themselves again These weren't dramatic breakthroughs. They were small shifts, repeated week after week. Social anxiety doesn't disappear overnight. It gradually loses intensity and stays gone longer. If you're wondering whether change like this is possible for you, this episode gives you a grounded picture of what that path actually looks like. Start with our free 7 Secrets To Social Confidence here

Enrollment for the Social Confidence Club is now open.https://bit.ly/socialconfidenceclub It's for people who want to work through social anxiety gradually without forced exposure. Before you decide, watch this short video. It explains:• how the live sessions work (including staying anonymous)• what participation actually looks like• what people typically notice changing over time Most members mainly watch replays. You don't have to be on camera.Everything is optional. Enrollment closes March 3, 2026. See how the Social Confidence Club works:https://bit.ly/socialconfidenceclub

Four years ago, I interviewed Tapani after he had already made significant progress with his social anxiety. His lifelong blushing had reduced dramatically. Life was opening up in ways that once felt impossible. Recently, he shared in our community that the last time he felt more than a little anxious was months ago. His anxiety barely bothers him anymore. And he described learning not just how to deal with social anxiety, but how to approach life differently. That made me curious. So we recorded this follow-up conversation to explore what actually holds up over time. What does long-term change from social anxiety really feel like? Not dramatic confidence. Not becoming a different personality. Not turning into the most charismatic person in the room. Instead: • Anxiety dropping from an 8 or 9 to mild physical tension • Blushing no longer dominating daily life • Social situations feeling ordinary again • Strangers no longer registering as threats • Relief that continues to deepen quietly If you've ever wondered: "Does this actually last?" "What if I improve… and then it fades?" "Is this realistic for someone like me?" This episode is for you. We talk about: • Fear of blushing and reputation anxiety • Anticipatory anxiety and how it changes • Why pushing anxiety away makes it worse • Acceptance and nervous system regulation • Why progress compounds gradually • What "feeling normal" really means This isn't a story about instant transformation. It's an honest look at how social anxiety can loosen its grip over time, and what life feels like when your system gradually updates instead of being forced. If you're considering whether this path might fit you, you'll find more details here. Take your time. Move when it feels right.

Enrollment for the Social Confidence Club is currently open. If you'd like to see how it works and whether it's a fit, you can start here: 👉 https://bit.ly/socialconfidenceclub Enrollment closes March 3. In the first two episodes, we looked at: • Why social anxiety keeps coming back • How it actually changes In this one, we make it practical. If you've ever wondered: "Where do I even start?" "What if I'm a tough case?" "What if I lose motivation again?" This episode lays out a structured path that fits how real change actually happens. We look at: • Why guessing what to tap on creates overwhelm • Why motivation always dips • Why progress builds gradually • Who this path makes sense for This isn't a quick fix. And it isn't dramatic. But it can be steady. Next week, I'll walk you through how the Social Confidence Club puts this structure into practice. If you prefer watching the video version, you can find it at: https://bit.ly/socialconfidencemasterclass  

Enrollment for the Social Confidence Club is currently open. If you'd like to see how it works and whether it's a fit, you can start here: 👉 https://bit.ly/socialconfidenceclub Enrollment closes March 3. In the last episode, we looked at why social anxiety comes back. In this one, we look at what actually changes it. If you've ever thought, "Maybe it just doesn't work for me," or "I don't want to get my hopes up again," That doubt makes sense. In this episode, I explain: • Why you can't out-think social anxiety • Why short-term relief doesn't always change deeper patterns • Why old emotional memories still win the prediction battle • How those predictions can gradually update Change isn't dramatic. It isn't overnight. But it can be steady. Part 3 will be published here on February 20. If you prefer watching the video version, you can find it at https://bit.ly/socialconfidencemasterclass

Enrollment for the Social Confidence Club is currently open. If you'd like to see how it works and whether it's a fit, you can start here: 👉 https://bit.ly/socialconfidenceclub Enrollment closes March 3. You try something. It helps for a while. Then the social anxiety returns. And when it comes back, it doesn't just feel like fear. It feels like failure. If you've ever wondered why social anxiety keeps coming back (even after therapy, exposure, or other techniques) or have thought: - "Is there something wrong with me?" This episode is for you. We explore why managing anxiety is different from retraining your nervous system's perception of threat, and why temporary relief doesn't mean you're broken. Part 2 will be published here on February 15. If you prefer watching the video version, you can find it at https://bit.ly/socialconfidencemasterclass.

Enrollment for the Social Confidence Club is currently open. If you'd like to see how it works and whether it's a fit, you can start here: 👉 https://bit.ly/socialconfidenceclub Enrollment closes March 3. The Social Confidence Club opens for registration the last week of February. After that, we close the doors for a year to fully focus on the group. All practical details (structure, schedule, testimonials) are on this page. You can also watch video testimonials from former Social Confidence Club members here.  This episode gives a clear, calm explanation of what the Social Confidence Club is and what it isn't. If you've lived with social anxiety for years and have tried things like therapy, exposure, CBT, or tapping, you may have had some relief that didn't last. This video explains why that happens and how a different, nervous-system-based approach can support more stable change over time. In this orientation, I explain:  • what makes the Social Confidence Club different from courses or quick fixes  • why social anxiety isn't a logic problem, but a nervous system issue  • how gradual change happens without forcing, rushing, or exposure pressure  • what participation actually looks like, including anonymity and replays  • who this approach is and isn't a fit for This episode will help you understand the approach and decide calmly whether it makes sense for you. Do you feel awkward in social situations? Do you struggle to be yourself around others? And do you fear being judged, being seen anxious, and embarrassing yourself? You're not alone. I've been there. It sucks. Big time. But there's hope. I've been fortunate enough to overcome my Social Anxiety... ... and I've helped hundreds of socially anxious clients overcome their struggles too. Thankfully, there's a gentle, powerful, and effective solution to beat it. It won't happen overnight, but with certain techniques and strategies, you can reduce your Social Anxiety quickly. And with persistence, you can become completely anxiety-free. Without needing to force yourself to awkwardly face your fears. Ready to get started on your journey to Social Confidence? Here are your first steps: 1.) Follow this Podcast and always get the latest episodes! 2.) Go to https://bit.ly/socialconfidencepodcast and receive access to a short transformational video to reduce your anxiety immediately. AND you'll also get my FREE "7 Secrets to Social Confidence" Mini Course. 3.) Let's connect! ●     SUBSCRIBE to my YouTube channel ●     Facebook ●     Instagram ●     X ●     TikTok ●     LinkedIn All the best on your journey to effortless social ease. 💪 Warm regards,Seb