An Interview with My Mom: Patsy Fleener | Episode 311

Did you know that grandparents who babysit their grandchildren were found to live 37% longer? As grandparents ourselves, this stat is impressive, but not surprising! We’ve experienced firsthand how investing in the lives of our grandchildren brings so much joy and purpose. Taking on this role has truly been one of our greatest gifts during this season of life.Even so, we know that the shift from “Mom and Dad” to “Grandpa and Grandma” takes some adjusting.It might feel like you’ve just gotten used to the empty nest season, and now you have to adjust to a whole new shift in your family dynamic! You have to be intentional about spending quality time with each grandchild, learning how much help the parents need or even want, and knowing when to hold your two cents until they’re requested. My guest for this important conversation has navigated all of this personally, and she’s here to share some words of wisdom. Lori Wildenberg is a licensed parent and family educator, author, and national speaker who is passionate about helping families build connections that last a lifetime and beyond. She has written seven family life books, including Grandparents Make Grand Partners. Lori is the grandma to soon-to-be six grandchildren.In this episode, you’ll hear:The greatest challenges parents and grandparents encounterHow to discover your unique style of grandparentingThe most important thing you can do when interacting with your grandchildrenAnd more!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes:  jillsavage.org/lori-wildenberg-315Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms

With summer coming to an end, many people are thinking back fondly of the time spent on vacation.Whether it’s road-tripping to see a new city, hiking and taking in the natural beauty around us, or sitting on the beach to soak up the sun, we can all benefit from a break from our usual schedules and routines.When we get away, we often experience a sense of peace and even gain new clarity about our lives. That’s why making space to step out of our normal is a powerful tool for growth and healing. Sometimes, when you’re seeking personal growth or positive change in your relationship, the best thing you can do is give yourself the time and space you need to truly reflect on your situation, gain a fresh perspective, and determine the best next step forward.This is why we started hosting our Marriage Intensives. During this dedicated, private 3-day retreat, we help couples break free from unhealthy patterns, work on areas that need attention in their relationship, and regain the intimacy they desire.In this episode, you’ll hear:Why you should take the time to step outside of your normThe value of dedicated time for growthHow an intensive can help change harmful patterns in our livesAnd more!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/stepping-outside-normal-314Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms

Have you ever walked through a season of life when finding the time to open your Bible seemed impossible? When the busyness of life—or perhaps struggles with your mental health—become overwhelming, it can be hard to slow down, quiet your mind, and spend meaningful time with God.Through many dark seasons of my own life, I’ve struggled to read Scripture and pray. Perhaps you, like me, have longed for a way to connect with God that meets you where you are and ministers to your soul in a different way.What if there were gentle faith practices that offered the hope and help you need when life makes you weary—without demanding that you follow a strict structure? My guest discovered these practices herself during a season of grief and anxiety.Becky McCoy is a writer, retreat leader, and spiritual director trained at Adelynrood Retreat Center. As a young widow who has processed her grief and learned to live with anxiety and depression, Becky uses her experiences to guide women in discovering gentle, trauma-informed ways of being and believing.In this episode, you’ll hear:Alternative spiritual practices for dark seasons of lifeThe beauty found in observing creationHow to practice stillnessAnd more!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/becky-mccoy-313Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms

Most parents hope to maintain a close, loving relationship with their children as they grow into adulthood. Unfortunately, the relationship they imagined doesn’t always become reality. When that happens, the disappointment can run deep, leaving parents wondering what went wrong and how to bridge the growing distance.Many of these relationships are marked by complex emotions like tension, grief, hurt, and even anger. Honestly, that’s one of the reasons I dedicated the first half of my book, Empty Nest, Full Life, to guiding parents on how to navigate the tricky process of developing new relationship dynamics with their children as they launch into the adult world.My latest guest on the podcast has done the same with her latest book. Dr. Kathy Koch is the founder of Celebrate Kids, and is known as a trusted guide for parents raising kids of all ages. She offers steady encouragement for parents in seasons that often feel uncertain. With a PhD in educational psychology and reading, Dr. Koch helps parents understand their children more clearly.In this episode, you’ll hear:The importance of waiting for our advice to be invitedHow parents can utilize the empty nest season to establish new routinesThe importance of being a safe person for our adult children to approachAnd more!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/kathy-koch-312Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms

My mom, Patsy Fleener, showed me what it looks like to have a beautiful, full life. I’ve always strived to be more like her, and I can only hope to have a life as full as hers when I’m her age!Mom came to town recently to see one of her grandchildren in a show, and I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to record a conversation with her while she was around.It’s always a treat to get to spend quality time with my mom, and I hope you’ll enjoy this conversation as we talk about some of the most important life lessons she’s picked up over the years, how she met my dad, Duane, and why I was inspired to dedicate one of my books to her.In this episode, you’ll hear:Lessons learned along the way in a marriage that spanned over five decadesWhat it looks like to have a full lifeStories about me from childhood (including a near-death experience with a spider!)And more!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes:  jillsavage.org/patsy-fleener-311Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms

“I’ve been seeing someone. It started a while ago. I tried to stop it, but…I didn’t.”“Do you love her?”“I don’t know. I think I might.”The words above will resonate with many who have walked through betrayal and its aftermath.If you’ve been part of our community for a while, then you’ll know that Mark and I have written many books about our experience healing from infidelity.My guest for this episode is an author who has walked through a similar hard season in her own life. But rather than writing about her real-life story, she chose to channel her experience into fiction. Through her writing, she explores the emotions, challenges, and pain of betrayal in a way that she hopes will encourage others.Danna Demetre is a Christian author, speaker, and wellness educator. She has a deep and enduring faith that has shaped her life and writing. For decades, she has encouraged women to pursue emotional, physical, and spiritual wholeness through biblical truth, personal growth, and resilient hope.In this episode, you’ll hear:Why forgiveness doesn’t immediately fix every hurtPractical tips for navigating betrayalHelpful tools to work through the aftermathAnd more!Danna’s journey includes so many similar details to our own. I hope you are just as encouraged as I was through this conversation.Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/danna-demetre-310Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms

When we’re trying to help others, it’s natural to offer advice, share practical strategies, or point people toward helpful resources. Those things are valuable and often necessary—but they’re also one step removed from your own experience.Sometimes, the most impactful thing you can offer is your story.It’s not easy to share your journey, with all its imperfections, hardships, and lessons learned along the way. It takes courage and vulnerability. But in exchange for this vulnerability, you can give the gift of real connection and hope that healing is possible.In the years following our own marriage crisis, we began sharing our story more openly and honestly, and something incredible happened.Couple after couple told us how much our story encouraged them, gave them hope, and helped them navigate challenges in their own marriages. We realized that our greatest qualification wasn’t having a perfect marriage. It was being willing to honestly share what God had done through our imperfect one.In this episode, you’ll hear:How even stories with “bad” endings can offer others hopeSome of the benefits of sharing your storyThe byproduct of sharing honestly and vulnerably with othersAnd more!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/your-story-309Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms

It’s time for even more God stories! When we started recording part one of this series, we quickly realized we would need more time to share our favorite God stories with you! If you haven’t done so yet, we strongly recommend going back and listening to part one here.A God story is one in which only he could connect the dots in surprising and even miraculous ways to provide answers to prayers and unexpected blessings. These are stories that inspire us and build up our faith as we look back and remember all that God has done.In this episode, you’ll hear:Why we need to learn how to both give and receiveFour more amazing God storiesThe importance of bringing your wants and needs to God in prayerAnd more!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/more-god-stories-308Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms

Trigger / Content Warning: I want to be sure my listeners are aware that in this episode we will be talking about the loss of a child and brief mentions of suicidal ideation. If these kinds of topics are hard for you to hear about, we recommend skipping this conversation.Dealing with grief can feel like being plunged into a terrible darkness and not knowing if or when you will get out. It’s a heavy burden to carry, no matter the circumstances surrounding your loss. In the midst of that pain, you may find yourself wondering if you’ll ever feel whole again, whether God truly sees and cares about your sorrow, or how you’re supposed to move forward with the ache now living in your heart.My guests for this episode know all about the process of grappling with grief.Dennis and Debbie Jordan walked through the death of their six-year-old son, Ryan, who lost his fight with leukemia. While it wasn’t easy, they wrestled with hard questions, clung to their faith, and today use their experience to help others walking through grief.In this episode, you’ll hear:How grief impacts marriagesThe importance of sharing our hurtsHow to comfort those walking through grief todayAnd more!We have been so encouraged by Dennis and Debbie’s story. We hope that anyone experiencing grief today would find hope and a path to healing.Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/dennis-debbie-jordan-307Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms

There are several instances in the Old Testament that reference setting up stones as a remembrance to God’s people of what He accomplished in that location. While we don’t often mark God’s work with piles of stone today, He is still at work all around us, in ways both big and small. Want to see His goodness? Look at the lives He is touching.When we catch glimpses of ways that He is working, usually how we least expect it, we like to refer to those as “God stories.” These moments might be when prayers are answered, when the Lord gives direction, or when He orchestrates details in a surprising way!God stories help us encourage one another, build our faith, and see the miraculous ways that He is working to meet our needs. We’re excited to share some of our most powerful God stories, and we hope you’ll share yours with us in return.In this episode, you’ll hear:How to use a “God box”How God orchestrated details to get us simple things like bread and milkThe value in sharing our God storiesAnd more!Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: jillsavage.org/god-stories-306Text us or leave a voicemail!Check out our other resources:Mark and Jill’s Marriage StoryMarriage CoachingMarriage 2.0 IntensivesSpeaking ScheduleBook Mark and Jill to SpeakOnline CoursesBooks Marriage Resources:Infidelity RecoveryFor Happy MarriagesFor Hurting MarriagesFor Marriages Where You’re the Only One Wanting to Get Help Mom Resources:New/Preschool MomsMoms with GradeschoolersMoms with Teens and TweensMoms with Kids Who Are LaunchingEmpty Nest Moms