189. echoes of an old you

attention is powerful. thinking about the things that matter to you and spending time nurturing them can change your life. isn't it logical to assume that what matters to us should get a significant amount of our time? easier said than done these days.

sobriety. old content i used to like that i still listen to just because it's preloaded into my feeds. the story in my head that good experiences will be unlocked once i improve myself.

overcoming loops of negative self talk. story telling from my early 20s.

1. write down a current struggle2. draw a big thick line separating the page3. write the answer/advice your future self who has overcome your struggle would give to you.

thanks for listening

thanks for listening

This is a conversation I had with my grandfather, Amp, my mother's father. I recorded us on a whim after a family gathering to celebrate my return to Iowa after a year-long road trip back in 2021. 4 years later and a lot has changed in my life and in Amp's life. I moved back to Iowa in October 24' to be closer to him and to the rest of my family. I was able to be a caregiver for him several times a week for about 6 months before he moved into a memory-care unit in mid March 25'. He has had some rapid decline in his ability to walk and balance, he has also become regularly confused and forgetful. He passed away on April 27th, 2025. I was able to be there in the hospital with Nani for about a day as he slowly and without pain passed away. I had no idea the way things would unfold when we recorded this conversation years ago. He sounds so incredibly full of life and I am absolutely filled with gratitude that I have this recording of his stories and his personality.I have discovered an interest and calling to work in end-of-life care. This conversation is very meaningful to me because it feels like I captured a part of Amp's essence, his personality, his charm. He is who he is, and I love every bit of him. Thanks for listening and finding some beauty in these stories from my grandfather.

thanks for slowing down, taking some deep breaths, and listening to this episode about money, society, desire, community, and just like life. :)

it's okay to start something and not finish it. to do a workout one time. to paint a painting and not want to paint again for years. to read a few pages of a book. to make a healthy meal and not want to make it again. to go to a yoga class and not go back. to post a video and not want to create a content schedule to post more. to follow your intuition and your interests as they are TODAY. tomorrow is not the time to become your best self, today is the time to live with intention.

You believe that your future holds so much potential and then it becomes the present and you have to act on your ideas of who you want to be and what you want to accomplish. This can become an experience that leads to a lack of trust in yourself. Providing evidence over and over again that you fail at becoming what you have the potential to become.Go easier on yourself. Break everything down into smaller pieces. Do one thing today that will feel good to have done when you look at it tomorrow. Start with little wins.00:00 Managing Time11:22 Internet Spaces and Communities15:42 Local communities22:16 Big media and advertising31:07 capitalism & gambling50:42 sports betting as faux investing54:50 hoards of money are stagnant01:02:00 TLDR01:04:46 Outro