When the Relationship Stops Feeling New

One of the scariest parts of a breakup or divorce is not always losing the relationship. Sometimes it’s realizing you lost yourself inside it. If you’ve caught yourself thinking, “When did I stop making room for me?” you’re not alone and you’re not broken.  I learned the hard way after my third divorce: losing yourself doesn’t usually look like a single big decision. It looks like a thousand small yeses you never meant to say.In this episode, I get into the real reasons men can lose their voice and themselves in relationship.  I share the story of “Chuck” who gave up music, friendships, and freedom trying to keep a relationship together, only to be left with anger, resentment, and a deeper feeling of shame. I give you five practical steps you can use right now, whether you’re rebuilding after divorce or breakup or already in a new relationship and noticing old habits creeping in. Check out the The Part of Yourself You Lost in Your Last Relationship, episode.Send us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44

After my second marriage ended, I spent a lot of time thinking about what I could have done differently. I thought that meant I had learned what I needed to learn. Then, in my next relationship and marriage, I repeated patterns I thought I’d already worked through. That was hard to face.Looking back now, I can see that some of what I called processing was actually reviewing the evidence against me and beating myself up. I could explain what had gone wrong afterward, but I hadn’t learned how to recognize my patterns while they were happening.This week, I’m beginning a new podcast series, Breaking Patterns That Keep You Stuck. I share more of that experience, along with a conversation with a client who had become convinced he would always fail in relationships. I also explore how to move from replaying your mistakes to understanding a pattern—and choosing something specific to practice.Check out the Why You Keep Thinking About What You Should Have Done Differently, episode.Send us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44

For a long time, I knew how to enjoy the exciting part of a relationship. The chemistry. The anticipation. The fun of getting to know someone. But when those feelings started to settle, I’d put a lot of energy into trying to get them back. I had a lot more to learn about sharing everyday life. The evenings when we're tired. The responsibilities. The times when one of you needs a little more patience or support.What I appreciate now is how much connection can grow in those ordinary moments. I think about that with my wife Karen. We’ve seen each other through different seasons, and we’re still discovering things about each other. I value that in a way I couldn’t have when I was younger.In this episode, I share a story about a young couple preparing for marriage — and a question that helped them look more deeply at the life they wanted to build. I also explore five ways to nurture connection after the early excitement settles. And this applies whether you’re married, in a committed relationship, or rebuilding after breakup or divorce and thinking about what you want to bring into your next chapter. Check out The Relationship You Build After the Honeymoon, episode. Send us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44

The fastest way to wreck a relationship is to believe love means you should always agree. When we hold on to that idea, one disagreement can feel like a dealbreaker, or we start agreeing just to keep the peace, and wake up months later realizing we’ve disappeared. In this episode, I revisit a story about “Jack and Diane,” a couple whose marriage got rocked by political change and what happened when a counselor asked them a question that shifted everything. Then I give you a clear framework for deciding what you are actually dealing with: preferences you can enjoy differently, shared-life differences that need workable agreements, and core values or essential life choices that may reveal true incompatibility. I also talk about where to draw the line. You’ll leave with simple language to use to speak up, have better questions to ask, and a three-part system you can use the next time a disagreement hits. Check out the You Can Love Someone and Still Have Differences, episode.Send us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44

What happens when the fear of losing someone turns into trying to control them? October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and in this BONUS episode you'll hear an honest conversation about emotional wounds, controlling behavior, and taking responsibility for how we show up in relationships.My guest is George Stoimenov, author, men's coach, and the voice behind the Men’s Corner podcast, based in the UK. Drawing from his own healing journey and his work with men in the justice system, George shares his perspective on patterns that can lead to abusive behavior—and the work it takes to change them.Understanding where these patterns come from doesn’t excuse the harm. It can help us recognize what needs to change—and begin building healthier, safer relationships. Check out the Domestic Violence: When Fear of Losing Her Turns Into Control With Author and Coach George Stoimenov, episode.Link to George's website: Mens CornerLink to George's podcast episode: Domestic Violence, Attachment and MasculinityLink to George's book: The Father-Wound and the Blueprint for Masculinity Send us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44

Disappointment will happen in a relationship. A change of plans. A response you weren’t expecting. A moment when you needed support and felt alone. Sometimes when disappointment happens—your mind immediately goes into what it could mean.“I don’t matter.” “She doesn’t love me.” “Maybe this isn’t going to work.”In this episode, as I continue my series, When Love Gets Real, you'll hear "Mitch & Megan's" story and how Mitch's interpretation of disappointment had him running for the exit door in relationship until he met Megan and decided to make a change.I also explore what to do when your partner disappoints you—from communicating your needs to making a repair, and recognizing when a boundary is needed. Check out the What Do You Do When Your Partner Disappoints You? episode.Send us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44

The minute a relationship stops feeling new can mess with your head. One day you’re laughing, flirting, and feeling like things are easy. The next day she’s disappointed, you’re annoyed, and your nervous system starts whispering, “Here we go again.” Then you start trying to get that new feeling back. In this episode, I’m beginning a new podcast series, When Love Gets Real, with the episode When the Relationship Stops Feeling New. I tell "Ryan's" story, a guy who usually leaves at this point—and what happened when he tried having the conversation he’d been avoiding. I talk about some of the reasons why we might want to leave at that stage,  and what to do when the relationship stops feeling new.  Check out the When the Relationship Stops Feeling New, episode.Send us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44

You can’t build real intimacy while you slowly lose yourself out of the relationship. In this episode, I ask a question that cuts through all the noise: can you be yourself with the person you love, not the polished version, not the always-agreeable version, but the real you? I also share a coaching story about Avante (not his real name), a man who tried to do everything right, made himself always available, and still lost the relationship, and his confidence along the way. I’ll walk you through some practical questions to ask your self to see if you're losing yourself, and what to do next if you have been.Check out the Can You Be Yourself in This Relationship? episode.Send us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44

A lot of men have people in their lives—but very few have a place where they can speak honestly about what they’re going through without feeling judged, embarrassed, or expected to have it all figured out.For a little over a year, I’ve had the privilege of facilitating conversations like these through MensGroup. I’ve seen what can happen when men put down the armor, discover they’re not alone, and begin supporting one another through the real stuff of life.In this week’s episode of the Men on the Path to Love podcast, I’m joined by MensGroup Community Manager Jim Heidema for a conversation about why these spaces matter, what happens inside a men’s group, and what men can gain when they stop trying to handle everything alone. Check out the What Happens When Men Finally Talk?: An Introduction to MensGroup, episode.Link: MensGroupSend us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44

Your gut notices the thing that “doesn’t sit right” way before your brain wants to admit it. I'm talking about that moment early in dating when a boundary gets crossed, a story feels off, or you catch yourself making excuses because the chemistry is strong and you really want it to work. In this week’s episode,  I talk about why so many smart, good men ignore relationship red flags early on.I'll show you what to pay attention to, and how to decide whether a possible red flag moment is a call for a conversation—or a repeated pattern that calls for a decision.I share my own relationship experience where I saw the red flags—but was so invested in what I wanted the relationship to become that I kept explaining them away. You'll also hear "Jimmy's" story about no matter how many warnings he got from others (and himself) he still ended up with someone who wasn't right for him. Check out the Stop Ignoring What You See Early in a Relationship, episode. Send us Fan MailSupport the showEmail: [email protected] Guide: 5 Steps to Understand Why Your Last Relationship Didn't WorkFree Guide: 7 Standards Every Man Needs Before Dating AgainWebsite: https://menonthepathtolove.com/Support The Show: Click HereFacebook: Bill SimpsonInstagram:@MenOnThePathtoLoveLinkedIn: Bill SimpsonSubstack: @billsimpson44